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once when i was 9 in animal crossing wild world i sent a breakup letter to jeremiah telling him it was over because i found someone new…. that was better than him. i told him i was in love with Crazy Redd now and that he couldnt compete cuz “hes a kitsune and youre just a frog.”

so eventually jeremiah moved to my friend’s town…. only i didnt know that villagers will show old letters. so then one day i get a goddamn phone call. an actual goddamn phone call. from my friend and she says: “hey, i saw your letter about dating crazy redd–” and i hung up on her instantly.

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you WISH you were eating sweet mulberries from a stranger’s overgrown tree at twilight in a silent neighborhood

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I’m high as shit and I’m just carrying around this lantern like a fucking guardsman

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miguel and miniguel

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I’ve gone to the women’s restroom a lot in my life, and not once have I ever seen genitalia besides my own while there. No penis, no vulva, nothing.

I’ve literally seen a bathroom full of baby lizards, one time a whole fucking fish on the floor, and someone come out of the stall with a plate, knife, and fork like they just ate a meal before I’ve seen genitals. Why would I ever be worried about seeing some woman with her cock out

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*opens the groupchat at breakfast to backread like its the morning paper*

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Welcome to our hellsite, Redditors!

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8:54 AM

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NASA Data Sonification: Black Hole Remix

In this sonification of Perseus. the sound waves astronomers previously identified were extracted and made audible for the first time. The sound waves were extracted outward from the center. (source)

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this tweet genre is so fucking funny i need more of them

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IT’S ALWAYS SUNNY IN PHILADELPHIA 13.05 – “The Gang Gets New Wheels”

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what it’s like to own a black cat