sopebabbles

[sopebabbles]

did you see her in the twilight?

the fawn limping across the road that night?

you're thinking you should've stopped right?

her dark eyes once shone so bright

but there was something that stole her light

someone stalked her in the dead of night

and the fawn was unaware of her plight

ears twitching and eyes widening at the sight

the assassin stood and smiled slight

so the fawn was unable to see his spite

his face was always covered and out of sight

never made visible even by the moonlight

the assassin's mask hardly slipped off alright

but when it did the fawn peered into his sleight

he then whipped out his shotgun in a fright

grazing the fawn's leg as she took flight

and the light in her eyes went out that night

he was a killer, was the best they'd ever seen

he'd steal her light before she ever heard a thing

he's an assassin and he had a job to do

little did he know, that fawn was an assassin too

[sopebabbles]

when do we decide life is fragile?

when natural disasters destroy thousands of homes?

when we pass a deadly accident on the highway?

when we see the homeless begging on the street?

when do we decide it’s too close to home?

when our mom’s old friend passes and she makes us attend the funeral?

when we’re taking dinner to the grieving family?

when the next saturdays are filled with repasts?

or is it when a family member is on the edge of death?

someone once so lively and alert, so beautiful

someone who once lived outside of an illness

now hanging onto, clinging to, grasping for life

when their breaths are too difficult to draw

when all the family gathers around their hospital bed

when they cry out at night for their caretaker

when they can hardly utter words anymore

when it’s already too late

that’s when it sneaks up on us—

the fragile nature of life

[sopebabbles]

now that you’re gone i cant stop seeing you

i walk around the nike store looking for you

i drive around day and night just to feel you

i listen to john mayer just to hear you

im up late trying to figure out your aim

wondering why i kept playing your game

convincing myself that there’s no flame

but my call log is flooded with your name

and im also wondering how you are

if we’re ever looking at the same stars

if you’re depressed and working on cars

if you’re under the covers writing bars

i just wanna share a redbull with you

discuss the situation from your point of view

while i lock my feelings far away from you

i guess im just trying to tell you that i miss you

[sopebabbles]

welcome home my beautiful 🥹

[sopebabbles]

dealing with the weight of my feelings for you

trying to deny it but god knows im screwed

pushing away my dreams about you

my god why it’s so hard to be around you?

yeah i know you’re not for me

and you probably never will be

but i still can’t shake what i want us to be

you lift the weight of the world off me

but you’ve got me overthinking to a degree

where anything you say makes me queasy

and my racing thoughts make me dizzy

i’ve spent years lonely and falling apart

but i still don’t understand the void in my heart

still can’t see why this is so damn hard

do you care about me or is your girl busy?

this isn’t the solution i thought it would be

and i know you’re not right for me

but even distancing myself is hurting me

why is even friendship giving me difficulty?

why couldn’t you be for me

i’ll never find anyone who’s just for me

[sopebabbles]

am i in love?

am i in love with you?

with the thought of you?

with how tall you are?

with how much you care?

with how handsome you are?

with how sweet you are?

am i in love because you want to fix my car?

because you asked me to come see you?

because you always want to hear my voice?

am i in love or am i just lonely?

am i in love or am i just attached?

am i in love or am i just unheard?

am i in love or am i just unloved?

[sopebabbles]

ummm soo.. hi!! ima be posting my poems from the past two months.

[sopebabbles]

wrote two lil something somethings lol

[sopebabbles]

love me

kiss me

feel me

hug me

i want long walks on the beach with you

i want early morning cuddles with you

i want to sip on hot chocolate at 1am with you

i want to go on long drives with you

it’s illegal how badly i want you

your face

your hands

your body

your lips

i lie awake at night thinking about you

thinking back to chilling all day with you

walking down the hall to the window with you

half-asleep and resting my head on you

couldn’t stand it but thank god i was with you

your hair

your touch

your eyes

your laugh

can’t wait to see you in my dreams

[sopebabbles]

how do i ask for love without feeling like a burden?

how do i ask being indebted to someone for the rest of my life?

why do i even need to ask?

why wasn’t i born with a life companion?

why can’t i just be loved?

why can’t the saddest person in the universe be loved by someone automatically?

why am i still wasting time on you?

why can’t i go on late night drives with you?

why can’t we talk without me feeling something?

why am i bound by rules that prevent me from falling in love?

why am i trying to prevent myself from falling in love?

[sopebabbles]

please just let me sleep

[sopebabbles]

and now i can’t sleep because of YOU like damn you for making me feel wanted and special and on top of the WORLD for a whole week and i STILL am clinging on to the hope that you want me

[sopebabbles]

it’s just like

what can i replace you with that makes immediately me smile at the thought of it like when i think of you

and THATS why ive been in denial

[sopebabbles]

i js wanted to be friends believe it or not

[sopebabbles]

i just wanted to prove to myself i could be friends with a guy and not be needy but this just made everything way worse

[sopebabbles]

and i try to act like i don’t care and i try to act like i know things and like i can handle things but i really can’t tbh

and i try to act like i know you’re into me

and you make me feel like i’m in control

and i don’t know what do with myself when im not

[sopebabbles]

and then i’m still gonna wake up tmr and hope you texted me. make it make sense.