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someonesingingalong · 7 years ago

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all we’d ever need

i should’ve been chasing you

Kelley never saw it coming.

She sits alone with her thoughts on the rooftop of their hotel. It doesn’t feel right, not one bit. She’d been so excited for camp, for much needed time together. But as soon as she walked in and locked eyes with Hope, she knew something was wrong. There was no smile, no hug, no sign of see you later; instead a guilt ridden gaze, a tug around the corner, and a deep breath.

Are you okay?

We need to talk.

You’re scaring me.

I think we should end this.

…

Kelley, I’m sorry. Say something? Please?

I don’t know what you want me to say.

It’s not about what I want.

I beg to differ.

…

Is there anything I could do to make you change your mind?

No.

Okay.

Kelley-

Don’t say my name like that.

…

I should go.

That’s it?

You’ve made yourself clear.

You don’t want to know the reason why?

No, I don’t.

But why-

Because whatever reason you give me won’t be good enough.

…

I don’t understand why; I probably won’t ever- and I’m not sure if I want to. But I do understand that this is how you feel. If you explain yourself, it’s only going to get more complicated- and I…I just don’t think I can handle that, not right now. So yeah, in some twisted way, I get this. I understand.

…

She had spoken the truth. Even now, after a whole day of processing what happened, she understands. There was absolutely nothing Hope could’ve said that would’ve made her feel better. Hope didn’t want to be together anymore and Kelley knew if she tried to fight it, she’d only make things worse for herself. She’d fight Hope and tell her that she didn’t want to lose her, that she was willing to work on their imperfections, that she loved her in all ways and always. Only then would Kelley realize that what they shared was in fact worth fighting for, and that alone would make everything all the more devastating.

The sun finally sets and the resulting darkness offers a chill. Kelley wraps herself further into her oversized hoodie and nearly jumps at the sound of a door swinging open. She’s not alone anymore, and she knows exactly who is the cause for that. Kelley’s head turns immediately and all it takes is Hope standing there for her to realize that she won’t be able to suppress her feelings forever. The tears flow with her emotions, but she brushes them away in an act of bravery and strength.

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t be here.” Kelley straightens her clothes while standing up. She apologizes, sniffling, “I forgot, I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay.” Hope manages to get out, still stunned to find the rooftop occupied.

“No, it’s not.” Kelley shakes her head and gets ready to leave, making sure she’s not leaving anything behind. “This is your thing, not mine.”

“It was our thing.” Hope interjects, the truth stinging them both.

“Was.” Kelley emphasizes. “It was our thing.” There’s a pause and Kelley already feels herself being suffocated by the silence, so she tells her, “You know what, I was just going to head back inside.”

“No, you don’t have to. This can be your thing too.” Hope weakly convinces. She’s normally alright with confrontation, but not with Kelley.

“Good night, Hope.”

Hope doesn’t even get the chance to response before Kelley can walk past her, head down and heart broken. She watches the door close behind her and suddenly there’s an empty pit in her stomach. She’s been ridden with guilt all day and now, at the one place where she clears her mind, she second guesses herself (Did you make the right decision?).

She sits alone with her thoughts on the rooftop of their hotel. It doesn’t feel right, not one bit.

Hope keeps to herself for the rest of camp. She doesn’t normally participate in the team’s outings, so her behavior isn’t surprising to everyone. She spends her free time alone and when she’s not alone, she watches Kelley from afar. She watches Kelley spend extra time with the new players in camp, partly because she’s just a friendly person and partly because Hope knows the young ones are a good distraction. She watches Kelley outrun everyone during the beep test, working herself so hard that it almost appears that she’s punishing herself. She watches as Kelley walks into the room at breakfast, her eyes tired (from crying) and breaths heavy (from practicing her shots on goal before dawn). It’s a routine Kelley falls into when she’s upset and one that only Hope knows about.

It slowly kills Hope, the way Kelley tries to mask how miserable she is. She knows she should avoid Kelley, but keeping her eyes on the younger woman makes her feel like she’s sharing her pain. Hope knows it doesn’t have to be this way; it was her decision after all. But as camp comes to an end, Hope realizes that she’s not upset with her decision, she’s upset in Kelley’s response, or lack there of.

Why didn’t Kelley want a reason?

Because she was convinced that there’s simply not a reason- at least one that isn’t good enough.

So on the last day, Hope watches Kelley leave without a goodbye (not that she deserves one) and feels like crying for the first time that camp, and she hates to admit it but Kelley’s got her convinced too.

There was never a reason.

Weeks later, Kelley settles back into her apartment, savoring each second before season starts again. She uses the time to visit with family, but mostly to reenergize herself. She’s just beginning to sleep through the night again- that is, until she’s awaken one morning by excessive knocking at her door. She doesn’t believe her own eyes when she opens the door.

“Please listen to me.”

Kelley blinks, making sure that it was in fact Hope standing in front of her at the crack of dawn. She shakes her head slowly, placing her hand firmly against the door ready to close it. Her actions speak louder than words.

Hope quickly counters, pressing her own hand against the door. “No, wait. Just hear me out. Please, Kelley? I have your sweatshirt.”

“What? My sweatshirt?” Kelley’s surprised. She gives Hope an incredulous look, not believing what had come out of her mouth. That wasn’t the answer she was expecting. When she doesn’t say anything else, Hope capitalizes on the opportunity to continue.

“Yeah, it was at my place. I’ve been doing some cleaning and I found it. Look, I know it’s not my responsibility anymore and I really shouldn’t be here, but this is your favorite sweatshirt. I know you can’t live without it and I know I could’ve just mailed it, but I thought I would bring it to you.”

“What are you doing here?” Kelley sighs, still avoiding eye contact.

“It’s your favorite sweatshirt.” Hope holds up the piece of clothing, like it were a peace offering.

“Hope.” Kelley’s voice is stern, her eyes full of warning.

“Okay, okay, I know, it’s really early.” Hope looks around nervously.

“It’s early?” Kelley says in disbelief, “Hope, you’re here in Atlanta!”

“Like I told you, I had to bring it to you. You never take this stupid thing off, so that’s how I know you won’t be able to live long without it.”

“That’s a bit extreme.” Kelley points out, but takes the sweatshirt into her own hands.

Hope tucks her arms into herself, letting out a small shiver. “Well are you going to let me in?”

Kelley’s hesitant at first and she wants to scoff at Hope’s tactic, but Atlanta was experiencing a cold front and it was freezing outside. She leaves the door ajar and walks back into her apartment and into the kitchen. Hope quietly lets her in and finds a place on the couch. Kelley comes out moments later, setting a mug on the table and handing a blanket to Hope. She mutters, “Here’s some coffee.”

“Thank you.” Hope cups the mug for warmth, taking a sip.

Kelley gets comfortable and curls up on the other end of the couch with her own cup of coffee, completely dumbfounded and still trying to process her surroundings. She just stares at Hope, not really knowing what else to expect.

“I know this is crazy.” Hope sighs.

“It is.” Kelley reaffirms, adding, “I don’t know why you’re here.”

“Your sweatshirt.”

“Well, thank you for returning it to me.” Kelley reaches over and pulls her sweatshirt over her head. She leans back, resting her head and closing her eyes. “Maybe I should rephrase this. I don’t know why I’m allowing you here.” She frowns, “How did you even find my apartment?”

“I called your Dad.”

“Are you kidding me? He’s awake at this hour?”

“I think he just landed; it sounded like he was at an airport or something.”

“I’m his daughter and I don’t even know his schedule.”

“Well between you and me, I was clearly the favorite.”

“I’m his daughter.” Kelley repeats, breaking into a smile just thinking about how well they had all gotten alone.

Hope laughs quietly too. She takes a deep breath and finally asks, “Did we make the right decision?”

“You’re the one who flew cross country, so you tell me.”

Hope leans into the couch, turning to face Kelley and admitting, “I realize that me coming here unannounced is a little unfair, but-”

“A little?” Kelley scoffs at her remark. “I think you need to leave soon. I can’t do this, Hope. I can’t sit here and have coffee with you and get my hopes up if you’re just here on a whim.”

“This is not a whim.” Hope responds firmly.

“So your plan was always to break up with me only to get me back not even a month later?”

“No, no, I was so stupid.” Hope finally tells her. “I was just protecting you.”

“Seriously, Hope?” Kelley sits upright, flustered. “How in the world are you protecting me? I’m not sure if I’ll ever get over this. I was so stunned by your decision. I never saw that coming. You’ve made me think that I did something wrong. I exhausted myself in camp. I cried every night. Every morning, I-”

“I know.” Hope immediately interrupts, “I was there too.” She crawls towards Kelley, placing a hand on her knee. “I am so sorry. I know that doesn’t fix what I’ve done to you, but I need you to know that you were right. I never had a reason for this. I was scared, I guess. But I miss you, Kelley. I don’t like who I am without you.”

Kelley listens in silence, mostly distracted by Hope’s touch. She’s afraid of making a mistake by giving Hope a second chance, but she’s more afraid of never getting over her. She admits in a whisper, “Maybe I was trying to protect you too. I didn’t fight for us because I didn’t want to push you.”

“I never should’ve put you in that position in the first place.”

Kelley places a hand over Hope’s. “I can’t pick up where we left off, but I also can’t live without you. I’m willing to work through this, but I need to know that you’re at least going to try.”

Hope feels tears brim her eyes as Kelley graciously forgives her. She smiles, leaning her forehead against Kelley’s. Her voice is soft and earnest, “I’m going to do more than try. I’m going to be everything and more for you, Kelley.”

“Hm, I don’t know.” Kelley jokes. “You’ll have to outcompete this sweatshirt.”

“Whatever it takes.” Hope laughs, her heart already on the mend. She’s never known a love like this before and she never thought she herself would get to experience it.

Hope never saw it coming.

#all we'd ever need #lady antebellum #my fics #Heart Beats

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someonesingingalong · 7 years ago

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Oh no, what do you have in mind now? 🧐

wow a baby o 'solo? that made me cry 💙💙💙

@someonesingingalong out here making us shed happy tears…while I’m out here making us shed…well, just…tears.

#leave me and happy o’solo alone

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someonesingingalong · 7 years ago

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I LOVED THE NEW UPDATE 😢😢😢😢😢❤❤❤❤❤❤

Aw thank you! I thought it was time for a little happy O’Solo family ❤️

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someonesingingalong · 7 years ago

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guiding light

when i need to get home, you’re my guiding light

Hope turns the final page of her book and reaches for the box of tissues on her nightstand. It’s the third sappy romance novel she’s finished over the last month, and she’s not sure if all the crying is from embarrassment over this newfound guilty pleasure or from her hormones being wildly imbalanced. Probably the latter (she’ll never admit that she cried over Nicholas Sparks). She wipes her tears away, rests her hands gently on her round bump, and closes her eyes. Not even five minutes goes by and she’s already agitated. She huffs in annoyance, not because she’s actually tired and wants the rest but because she’s so done with being confined to her bed since the start of her last trimester.

Bang.

Hope’s eyes open. She lifts her head towards the noise.

Bang. Bang.

Hope frowns, swinging her legs over the side of the bed. She pushes against the mattress for support and slowly stands up. She leaves the bedroom, but stops halfway down the hall when she hears Kelley’s voice.

“Why are there three holes and just two nails? That makes no sense. Did I lose a nail? I swear I was careful opening all the packages.”

Bang. Bang. Bang.

Hope hears Kelley’s voice turn into a whine.

“Dad, I don’t understand. I don’t know how to do this. Yeah…yep, I did that…I don’t know? No, it’s okay…Dad, I said it’s fine. I don’t need you to come. I’m going to figure this out myself. I can do it…okay, okay, I will. Yeah, love you too. Bye.”

Hope finally appears in the entry way of their soon to be baby’s nursery. Kelley’s in the middle of the room holding a hammer in one hand and her cell phone in the other, completely surrounded by empty plastic bags, pieces of wood, and a tool box. Hope lets out a small chuckle, “Hey.”

“Hey.” Kelley murmurs back, still occupied by the instruction pamphlet at her feet. It takes a few moments until her head snaps up towards Hope. “Hey! You’re supposed to be in bed.”

“I couldn’t sleep.” Hope shrugs, folding her arms and leaning against the doorframe.

Kelley’s expression softens, “Am I being too loud? I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to wake you up.”

“No, no, I couldn’t even fall asleep in the first place.” Hope grumbles, “No surprise there.” She begins to settle down on one of the many unopened boxes in the corner of the room.

“Whoa, what are you doing?” Kelley lays down the hammer, lunging towards Hope as if she were some delicate work of art.

“What?” Hope frowns, finally settling into a sitting position.

“You’re supposed to be in bed.” Kelley gently repeats.

“Kelley, I’m going to go insane if I spend another hour in our room. I’ve been there all day!” Hope lets out an uncharacteristic whine.

Kelley notices Hope’s eyes round with plea and she shakes her head, “Don’t give me that look. It’s doctor’s orders.”

“So?”

“So that means we have to follow the rules, Hope.”

“Oh so now you care about the rules?” Hope snorts, leaning against the wall behind her.

“I follow rules!” Kelley retorts in offense. She eventually corrects herself, “I…I just…find loop holes, that’s all.”

Hope shrugs, “Okay, well, I’m just watching you. I’m not walking around; I’m technically resting.”

“Hope…” Kelley says with warning.

“Did I mention you look sexy with that hammer in your hands?” Hope cheekily responds.

Kelley feels her cheeks fill with color. She playfully picks up the hammer and points it at her wife, “Fine, just don’t move. I’m watching you.” She smiles, returning to the messy pile before her. Hope spends the next half hour sticking to her word. She watches Kelley fiddle with piece after piece, build something, take it apart, and rebuild it all over again.

Damn.

Shit.

Fuck.

Hope interrupts, an exaggerated look of horror on her face. “There’s a little one in the room, you know.” She motions to her baby bump.

Kelley looks up from position on the floor. She glares, her bun falling out of place. “Well tell that little one chose the most impossible crib to build.”

“She? If I recall correctly, it was one of her mommies who just had to have the newest and most expensive model, the one that rocks back and forth, and is made of top notch imported wood.”

Kelley groans, “You know I can’t settle for anything less when it comes to you and our baby girl.” She returns to the haphazard looking piece of furniture at her feet. She kicks some pieces around with her feet and shakes the instructions, “Fuck IKEA!”

“Kelley! Language, seriously.” Hope scolds, covering her belly with her hands as if it were to help.

“I know, I know, it’s just this one stupid step.” Kelley begins to mumble to herself as she moves pieces around the room, “Okay, that goes there…and that goes over there, but why would that go there?”

Hope laughs, slowly standing up. She wanders towards Kelley and snatches the instructions out of her hands. “Let me see this.”

“Hey!” Kelley snatches the pamphlet back. “You said you were just going to watch!”

“You need help.” Hope reasons simply.

“You need to be in bed.” Kelley counters. She lets out a sigh as her expression falls, “I’m supposed to do this. This is, like, my only job. You’re growing a child in you and I can’t even follow directions.”

“I told you I was willing to help, babe.” Hope offers again, taking a couple steps closer.

Kelley instantly guides Hope back to the corner of the room where she had been sitting. She instructs quietly, “Sit down.”

“I’m going to help you.” Hope’s adamant in getting her way. She suggests, “Just let me have a look at the directions.”

“No, I can do this by myself!” Kelley exclaims, returning to the pile of pieces still untouched. Already flustered, she somehow trips over a couple tools, stumbling forward a couple steps. Hope can’t help but laugh, earning another glare from Kelley.

“If you weren’t so cute when you’re frustrated, I’d be upset that it’s less than a month from my due date and the crib isn’t done yet.” Hope chuckles.

“This isn’t funny!” Kelley pouts, muttering under her breath, “By the time I finish this crib, she’ll be old enough that she won’t even need it anymore. Stupid little nails and stupid little holes that the stupid little nails stupidly don’t fit.”

Hope grins, adding, “I love you, but tell me how I’m going to raise a child with a child. You’re going to leave me with everything else since you can’t even put together a crib.”

Hope’s words sting a little. Kelley knows it isn’t intentional, but she feels helpless. She takes a deep breath and exits the room without another word. She hears Hope calling after her. She ignores her until she hears footsteps following behind. Turning around, she sighs, “Hope, please you really need to be off your feet.”

“Well you can’t just walk away from me like that. It’s not fair.” Hope tells her. She feels her own guilt arise and reaches for Kelley’s hand, “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean for-”

“It’s okay.” Kelley interrupts, gently guiding Hope down the hallway and back to their room. “Come on, you need to lay down.”

Hope reluctantly gives in, lying down on the bed and resting her head on her pillow. When she notices Kelley handing her a blanket, she frowns, “You’re not staying?”

“I’ll be back.” Kelley replies.

“Kelley…” Hope notices Kelley’s subdued demeanor. She suddenly feels terrible for joking with Kelley; the younger woman is obviously more than upset about the crib. “I was joking. I’m sorry.”

“I just need some air, okay? Get some sleep. I’ll be home in a bit.” Kelley offers a small smile, kissing Hope’s forehead and leaving their room.

Later that evening, Hope awakes to Kelley gently whispering to her. She squints as Kelley comes into focus, groggily greeting, “Hey, where did you go?”

“Oh, I just walked to the store for some groceries.”

Hope looks out the window, noticing the sky darken. “What time is it?”

“It’s almost 7. I think you’re more exhausted than you think.”

“I guess.” Hope yawns, slowly sitting up. “You didn’t wait on me for dinner, did you?”

“I haven’t eaten yet, but I’m not really hungry.” Kelley admits, changing the subject quickly, “Come on, I have something to show you.” She holds her hand out and takes Hope’s hand, guiding her back to the nursery. Inside, everything is carefully in place- frames on the wall, the rocking chair in the corner, the bookshelf full of toys and books, the changing table to the side, and the finished crib at the opposite end of the room.

Hope’s at a loss for words, amazed by the completed nursery and allowing the fact that their family is truly growing sink in. She turns to the side where Kelley waits with hopeful eyes. “You did all this? How did you…but the crib…”

“I told you I could do it myself.” Kelley grins.

“But all of it? Kelley, this is a lot. Why didn’t you wake me up?” Hope tells her.

“Don’t worry about it, I wanted it to be a surprise.” Kelley enters the room, walking around it. “Okay, so picture this. You come here to comfort the baby after a nap and you can sit down in the rocking chair, which is placed next to the bookshelf. I know how much you like to read and that you’ll want to read to the baby too, so you can just easily grab a book from here. I also wanted the chair close to the window so that after you’re done reading, you can just enjoy the view of the backyard where I’ll be teaching our four year old how to dribble a ball. Can you see it now? It’ll be the perfect Sunday afternoon.”

Hope doesn’t know what to say. She shakes her head, still in disbelief, and smiles as she walks to Kelley, wrapping her arms around her. She whispers, “I love you, thank you.” She pulls away for a moment, her voice filling with seriousness. “Kelley, I hope you know that you’ll always be enough for me. I can’t even begin to describe what you’ve done for me, but all I know is that you’re all I need. I don’t need anything else, but you. Just you.” She leans down, kissing Kelley gently and bringing her close again. She jokes, “I didn’t know we were having two kids.”

“Minimum.” Kelley grins up at her.

“That’s really funny, Kel.”

“I’m being completely honest! I want a big family with you.” Kelley admits, sweetly intertwining their hands.

“Let’s revisit this conversation after this first one is born.” Hope suggests, holding Kelley close.

“Alright, fine.” Kelley compromises and then quietly says, “And since we’re on the topic of being completely honest…”

“Who built the crib?” Hope cuts to the chase, knowingly raising her brow.

Kelley relents, finally admitting, “My dad came over while you were asleep. Hey! You don’t have any faith in me do you?”

“Well if we’re being honest with each other, then yeah, I don’t.”

“Me neither.”

They look at each other for just one moment before they burst into the kind of laughter that fills the nursery and echoes throughout their home.

#guiding light #foy vance #my fics

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someonesingingalong · 7 years ago

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Don’t worry folks, I’ll bring fluff to the party.

OFC IT HAD TO BE YOU! can't you tone it down a notch like Kell said but with the angst insteaf of volume 😭😭

I can’t help it! The fics write themselves!

#coming next week

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someonesingingalong · 7 years ago

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taxi (II)

maybe we could go back, do you wanna?

Kelley squints with one eye open at the glare coming through the window. She knows Becky likes to get up at the crack of dawn every day, but she didn’t have to wake up the whole world with her. The least she could do was close the blinds. Kelley groans, grabbing the nearest pillow to shield her eyes. She tries to fall back asleep until there’s pounding at the door.

“Kelley, get your ass out of bed!”

“Come on, dude, it’s almost ten! I’m hungry!”

Kelley’s head perks up in the midst of her sheets. If she didn’t already have a migraine, she definitely has one now. She makes out the time on the bedside alarm clock and curses. The pounding continues, courtesy of none other than Pinoe. She yells, raspy voice and all, “I’ll meet you down there!”

Kelley swings her legs over the bed and stands up, or at least tries to. The ground in front of her doubles and she has to blink her vision steady before toppling over. She somehow manages to make it to the bathroom, only to take one look in the mirror and realize her t-shirt was inside out and backwards, like it was haphazardly thrown on. She tries to twist it around, but upon smelling a slightly funky odor (good god, was it dirty?), she decides to change into something entirely new.

Leaving the bathroom, she’s blinded by the sun once again and hit with the sound of her teammate’s footsteps trudging back and forth down the hall. Everything’s so bright. Everything’s so loud. She takes a step forward, feeling the straps of her bra or underwear or probably both tangled between her toes. She must’ve been tired last night. She bends down to pick up her clothes, stuffing them in her duffel, but when she looks up, her sight hones in on the two precariously placed items on her nightstand: a glass of water and a bottle of aspirin.

Kelley corrects herself. She must’ve been drunk last night.

She silently thanks Becky for her small act of kindness and walks over, pops a few pills in her mouth and downs the glass in one go. She grabs her card key and heads down to the conference room where breakfast was held. She only trips once.

As soon as she opens the door, her ears ring with all sorts of noises- more footsteps, chatter, and forks clinking plates. She manages to spot an open seat at the nearest table and pulls out the chair, immediately laying her head on the table in defeat.

“Good morning, sunshine!” Pinoe’s eyes shine with mischief as she greet her in a sing-song tone.

“I hate you.” Kelley mumbles into the table cloth.

“How much did you have?”

Kelley finally lifts her head, looking incredulously across the table. She responds to Becky. “How am I supposed to know?”

Alex snorts, recalling the first hour of their night out. “Three beers and two tequila shots, for starters.”

“For starters?! No way!” Pinoe’s eyes almost pop out of their sockets. “You’re my hero, O’Hara!” She dramatically bows down to her.

Kelley shoots her teammate a glare, “Okay, Pinoe, if you don’t want a pancake shoved in your face, I suggest you take it down a notch in volume…like to this level.” Her voice ends in a whisper. Turning to the rest of the group, she asks, “Why would you let me do this to myself?”

Allie takes her fork, pointing it back at her, “You know, in our defense, you’re the worse to keep track of. You’re like lightning fast! I don’t know, but it’s like you gain superpowers when you’re drunk.”

“Yeah, all three of us were on Kelley duty last night!” Alex gestures at herself, Allie, and Pinoe.

Emily chews with her mouth full, adding, “You lost her in like ten minutes.”

“Exactly.” Alex smirks.

“Well, it’s not like you two were any help.” Pinoe speaks towards Becky and Emily. “If it weren’t for your whole karaoke debacle with Carli, we wouldn’t have needed to search for another bar. Honestly, that second place was poppin’!”

“Okay, first of all, stop trying to make poppin’ a thing. It hasn’t been a thing since, I don’t know, forever!” Becky argues loudly, and then continues, “And second of all, it was Carli’s fault!”

Before anyone else could get a word in, Carli interrupts from a few tables over. “It was not my fault!”

Everyone rolls their eyes and Kelley can’t help but laugh. She’s not surprised. She vaguely remembers Carli going one-on-one with the DJ. She shakes her head, “Damn, I haven’t been this hungover since college.” She watches as everyone’s brows raise in unison. She sighs, “Okay, fine, since the World Cup.”

“There you go, kid.” Becky pats her on the back.

Kelley glares in return as she gets up to get a plate of food. Nothing sounds appetizing, so she ends up with half a bowl of cheerios. She sits back down, taking a handful and throwing them in her mouth.

Emily breaks the silence, “So it’s been killing me, what did you two do last night?!” She earns a shove from Becky.

Kelley swallows, but her mouth is half full still. She turns around to make sure no one was behind her. “Two?”

“Yeah, you know, you and Hope.” Emily fills in the blank.

“Hope?!” Kelley exclaims, almost knocking over her bowl.

“Jesus, Kelley, shhh!” Becky hushes her, only to receive a blank stare from her fellow defender.

Pinoe smirks, “Well it’s not a secret they went back to the hotel alone last night. We all saw it.”

“Plus, she’s been staring over here all breakfast.” Allie adds. Alex nods beside her in agreement.

Kelley sneaks a quick look at the goalkeeper, who’s in mid conversation with Carli. She whispers, “So what happened?”

“That’s what we’re asking you!” Emily reminds her.

“I don’t remember!”

Becky sighs, the truth unfolding once she opens her mouth. “Look, you were too drunk to come with us to the second bar, and Hope was heading back to the hotel early, so we thought- well we might’ve convinced her- to take you back too. She said she’d take care of you- really, it’s Hope. She didn’t mind, and if she did, she would’ve said something. Seriously, you don’t remember anything?”

Kelley’s clearly lost. She tells them, “I think the operative word here is drunk. So no, of course I don’t remember every detail!”

“Damn, the details are the best part.” Emily whines. It takes everything in Kelley not to lunge across the table.

Kelley picks her brain, thinking really hard about the night before. “I left the hotel with Alex and Allie. I got a drink at the bar, there were some girls on the dance floor, I had another drink, uhm, oh you guys were playing pool, and then Carli started fighting with that DJ, and then it got really hot, so I left to…oh, go outside, and I saw Hope, and then she was getting into a taxi and….” Kelley’s voice trails into silence, memories flooding back (oh my god, the taxi).

She stands up suddenly, this time knocking over her bowl of cereal. There’s no time to think or make a decision other than to speak to Hope. There’s still large gaps in her memories, and she’s the only one who could remedy that. She knows she’ll regret it later, but she’s already hungover and might as well get this conversation out of the way.

Kelley sits down next to Hope, instantly harassing her with questions. “What happened?”

“Good morning to you, too.” Hope continues to pick at the last bit of food on her plate.

“What happened?” Kelley repeats. She needs to know.

“Is the aspirin helping?”

“That was you?” Kelley’s eyes widen, “You were in my room?”

“Aw, thanks Hope for taking such good care of me last night.” Hope shrugs. “What are you going to do, tell Jill?”

“Is this funny to you?” Kelley is appalled at Hope’s nonchalant behavior. “What did we do, Hope? I know you know what happened. You’re too old to get drunk.”

“No thank you and now an insult? You’re bold this morning.” Hope masks her hesitation. She realizes she’s being a lot harsher than necessary, and unfair, so she sighs, “Kelley, you’re still drunk.”

“No, I’m hungover, which means I’m one step closer to being sober.” Kelley corrects, and adds, “It also means I don’t have time for this bullshit.”

Hope explains, her tone softening, “Look, I just think we should save this for another time…maybe when we’re both fully coherent, not in the middle of breakfast, and surrounded by the entire team.” Hope likes her privacy, and she knows Kelley does too.

“We slept together, didn’t we?” Kelley bluntly concludes. Carli nearly chokes and Hope feels pairs of eyes turn on them from all over the room. It’s like they were being studied under a microscope.

Hope huffs loudly in annoyance, murmuring, “Well I was basically done with breakfast, anyways.” Before her cheeks can redden anymore, she stands up, grabs Kelley’s arm, and guides her out of the nearest exit. They stand face to face in the nook of a hallway. Hope remains quiet. Kelley had started the conversation, so it was only fitting for her to continue it.

“Tell me everything.”

Hope’s stupid to think that Kelley would let her go easily. She thought she’d have more time to wrap her head around things before this. She truly doesn’t regret anything, but Kelley doesn’t need to know that. If they truly valued their friendship, then the best thing they could do was forget about what happened. But still, Kelley deserved the truth. Hope begins to recount the night before.

“I was heading back early because I was tired. I was waiting outside for my ride when you showed up. We talked for a bit, you reeked of alcohol, and I was dumb enough to get persuaded to take you back. But whatever, I’m your teammate and friend, and that’s what friends do, they take care of each other. It wasn’t that big of a deal until we got into the taxi and well…I don’t know, you just…” Hope pauses, trying to hint to Kelley what followed after. The younger woman stands her ground, leaving Hope no choice to finish. “You were halfway outside the window at one point and then you kept touching things, mostly me, and saying things…and well, we got back to the hotel…” Hope sighs, “You really don’t remember?”

“I need to hear it from you.” Kelley replies bravely. Deep down, she already knew how the night ended.

“I was trying to undress you- you managed to get your arms stuck in your shirt- and well, I couldn’t find a clean shirt for you to wear…I don’t know, I really was just trying to help you and get you into bed- well you know what I mean…” Hope’s not sure why this is so hard for her. It just happened. She looks Kelley straight into the eye, admitting, “It wasn’t like that…until it became exactly that.”

“Fuck, Hope…just stop talking.” Kelley interrupts, not wanting to hear another word. She doesn’t need further explanation. She closes her eyes for a moment and takes a deep breath. “I remember.”

Hope waits. She waits for Kelley to acknowledge her, to say anything that would remotely give her an idea of what was running through her mind. It’s not long before Kelley’s eyes lock her in.

“I was drunk!”

“I know, I know. I’m sorry.” Hope begins to apologize profusely, even if she really isn’t sorry about what they had done. “I shouldn’t have gone in the room with you, or take you home for that matter. We shouldn’t have been alone.”

“I…I didn’t know what I was doing!” Kelley stresses in disbelief.

Panic flashes across Hope’s face. She didn’t want Kelley thinking the wrong idea. She reaffirms, “Hey, I would never take advantage of you-”

“I know.” Kelley immediately cuts her off, repeating quietly. “I know you wouldn’t. I’m not saying that you ever would…it’s okay.” A weak smile forms on her lips. “I’m sure I didn’t make it easy for you.”

Hope matches Kelley’s expression, a soft chuckle escaping her. “No, you definitely did not.”

Both of them look like they’d rather talk about absolutely anything else, but the remaining conversation is inevitable. Kelley’s brave enough to speak first. She speaks so softly, she’s not sure that Hope can even catch what she asks. “Where does this leave us?”

“It never happened.” Hope won’t sugarcoat her answer. She can’t lead Kelley, or herself, into believing that this was a good thing. At the end of the day, it was a mistake.

A part of Kelley wishes that Hope’s response was different. She knows their split had been amicable, but she always liked to think that maybe they were just on a break. Even with Hope married now, Kelley can’t help but wonder if the older woman still felt anything- anything at all- for her (the answer lies in the bed sheets from the night before). She had hoped, years ago, that they’d get the chance to talk about things more, that she herself could tell Hope that she was so done being on a break. Now is her only chance.

“What if I don’t want to forget?” Kelley asks. She takes a step closer, purposely invading Hope’s personal space. She tells her honestly, “I’m not like you, Hope. I don’t do this. I don’t do one night stands.”

“I care about you, Kelley. I wouldn’t treat you like dirt, like you meant nothing to me. What happened last night was not a one night stand!” Hope pleads.

“Well it sure looked like one when I woke up this morning!”

“It wasn’t, okay? We both know it wasn’t…because there’s something between us.” Hope finally admits, taking Kelley by surprise. She never expected Hope to be so open. Things had changed. “There always has been, always will be. But we already agreed, Kell. We’re not meant to take this any further than it already has gone. We already tried years ago.”

“We didn’t try hard enough.” Kelley’s tone is full of frustration. It isn’t fair. She moves even closer, persuading Hope by the touch of her hand upon hers.

Hope immediately takes a step back, her head hung low. Her voice lowers in warning. “Don’t make me do this again, please.”

“I just want to go back, Hope.” Kelley is desperate. “If I could, I would it all over again. I would do it right.”

“I care so much about you…you don’t even know.” Hope’s voice cracks with a kind of love that pervades everywhere and everything. “But look at where we are now. It’s better this way. I’m happy- and don’t tell me I’m not because I am, okay? I’m…content.” Hope is more than aware that word has an entirely different meaning, but she doesn’t have the energy to correct it. It is what it is.

“I’m happy…that you’re happy.” Kelley slowly begins to cave. She never intended for them to fight. They were done with all that; they had grown. Yet, she’s not very convinced.

“Just let us go, alright?” Hope places her hands on Kelley’s shoulders, rubbing up and down her arms in a poor attempt to comfort her (it really just makes it worse). A lone tear escapes Kelley’s eyes, but no matter how fast she wipes it away, the trail that it leaves behind forever etches itself in Hope’s memory. Hope immediately removes her hands. “Last night was a mistake- my mistake. I won’t ever put us in this position again. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have agreed to take you home. This is on me.”

Kelley finally sees regret fill Hope’s eyes. It pains her even more, but she remembers that she’s done this once before, and she could do it again. She tells her, “Stop taking responsibility for me. This is on me, too.”

Hope nods slowly in agreement. “So we’re okay now?” She sticks her hand out, and it hangs awkwardly. Kelley looks down at her gesture and she opens her mouth to reply, but nothing comes out. She can’t believe this; this isn’t how they do things (a handshake, really?). But Hope reads her mind as usual and before she can make another move, she hears a heavy sigh and feels strong arms wrap around her tightly.

Hope whispers into her hair, “Never mind, just come here.” Kelley buries herself in the comfort of Hope’s chest because that’s all she’s ever known and how dare Hope ask her that question when she already knows what she’ll say.

(No, we aren’t okay)

#taxi part 2 #exes #my fics

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someonesingingalong · 7 years ago

Note

Oh you're a new fan?! How long have you been a fan for? Have you been to a reign game or any NWSL games?

I’ve been to a few Reign games. This league has been a fun one to get into...don’t understand how women’s soccer is only now getting time in the spotlight. Hope to see it grow!!!

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someonesingingalong · 7 years ago

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taxi (I)

elevate my heartbeat

The neon lights from the local bar reflect onto the streets outside. The cool weather isn’t unusual for January, but the occasional gust of wind makes it feel like the temperature is dropping by the minute. Hope’s hands shake as she ends the call on her phone and returns it to her back pocket. She clasps her hands together and brings them to her mouth, blowing hot air in a poor attempt to remain warm. She regrets not grabbing anything else but her oversized sweater- usually, she stays out long enough to the point of overheating in an overcrowded bar, but tonight she’s turning in early. She lets out a yawn that turns into a visible puff of cold air and realizes that camp had been more exhausting than she originally thought it would be. She knows the first one of the year is always tough, with fitness tests and all, but Hope feels her. The influx of younger players isn’t necessarily a bad thing; they have pushed them all in different ways. Their team is getting faster and stronger each day, and while they still struggle to find chemistry, Hope is certain they’ll make significant progress in no time and be an even better team than the one in Vancouver. They have to be if they have any chance at earning another star.

Hope looks at her watch; it’s a quarter past ten. Her ride back to the hotel should arrive within the next five minutes, but she can barely keep her eyes open. They just about flutter shut when she hears a door swing open followed by a stumble of steps. She’s mildly annoyed that she’s not alone anymore- she doesn’t have the energy for a conversation- but when she turns around, her expression softens. She can’t help it (she never can).

“Hope, hey!” It’s Kelley, face flushed with a nearly empty drink in hand. She walks over and Hope feels her energy roll off in waves. She stands up a little straighter.

“Hey.” Hope greets in return. A part of her knows it’s just in Kelley’s nature to be so approachable, so likeable. But another part of Hope wonders if there’s intention behind her actions. She wonders if her younger teammate purposely seeks her out; it’s more often than not that she finds the younger woman lingering around her, even if it’s just for a small fist bump or an exchange of looks. This thought alone is enough to make her palms sweaty. It shouldn’t, but there’s always been a lot of should nots between them. Should not have been roommates. Should not have been friends. Should not have left the after party in London, alone. Should not be alone tonight.

“Where are you running off to?” Kelley asks, her eyes widening with an idea. “Wait no, I want to guess. Let me guess! Don’t tell me!” She grips Hope’s arm, as if her alarmed tone wasn’t enough.

“Okay…” Hope says slowly, more concerned by Kelley’s hands and their potential to wander. She knows from experience.

Kelley lets go though and brings her hand to her chin in a classic pensive look. Hope smiles at her dramatics, completely oblivious to the fact that Kelley’s actually serious about whatever game she’s trying to play. Hope doesn’t mind though; it’s killing her wait time.

“Oh, I got it!” Kelley’s on her toes now, taking a step closer to Hope without actually touching. “You’re going to a coffee shop!”

“Yeah,” Hope’s on auto-pilot, completely distracted by the distance (or lack thereof) between her and the shorter brunette. She quickly corrects herself, “What? No, Kell, what coffee shop would be open now?”

“Well, I don’t know…I’m close though, right? You’re getting coffee, but at one of those gas stations, right?” Kelley shoots her finger guns, making some sort of clicking noise with her mouth.

Hope stares at Kelley in disbelief. Sometimes it’s hard believing she graduated from Stanford. She reasons, “Kelley, why would I be getting coffee this late? It’s ten at night. Where do you think I’m going?”

“Ahhh, yes, yes…I know exactly where you’re heading. It’s that place we all came from. You know, it’s like home but sorta not really home. There’s a bed with pillows and complimentary breakfast in the mornings and those really nice old men who greet you every time you enter or leave. It’s called, uhm…oh gosh, don’t tell me, it’s on the tip of my tongue…”

“You’re joking right?” If it weren’t Kelley, Hope would’ve walked back to the hotel by now. Where was her damn ride?

“Don’t tell me! I almost have it!” Kelley pauses shortly before giving up, “Okay fine, I give up. It’s too hard.”

“A…hotel?”

“YES! That’s it!” Kelley’s eyes shine like a kid on Christmas morning, completely unaware of her drink sloshing all over the place. “Yes! Thank you! I knew it. You and I, Hope-” She points between them wildly, “We’ve always been on the same page!”

Realization dawns over Hope, she can’t believe how tired she was to miss this. Her response is flat. “You’re drunk.”

“Am not!” Kelley shoots her a look, taking great offense.

“Yeah, you are.” Hope bends down slightly, her suspicions confirmed as she gets a strong whiff of alcohol. “Give me that before you spill the rest of it.” Hope takes away her drink, grabbing her arm at the same time. “You’re going back inside before you wander off lost and it’s New Orleans all over again.”

“Hey, I was not that drunk that night! I mean, we had to do Abby’s sendoff justice.” Kelley tries to struggle free, but after realizing she’s no match to Hope’s goalkeeping arms, she grins stupidly. She kind of likes it. Hope rolls her eyes.

There’s definitely intention.

Before Hope can drag her any further down the sidewalk, she sees an outpour of her teammates from the entrance to the bar. Alex is the first to spot them. “Oh, I found Kelley!”

“You guys leaving already?” Hope tugs at Kelley, bringing her over to the rest of the group.

“Well someone got us kicked out.” Emily glares at Carli, standing next to a timid Sam.

“What karaoke bar does not have ‘Don’t Go Breaking My Heart’? Absolutely ridiculous. That’s a classic duet!” When Carli’s riled up, the team can’t help but pick on her. It’s amusing- and it’s good for her.

Becky smirks, “You’re just mad that we destroyed you guys at pool.”

“No, I’m not! We deserve a second challenge. I vote for darts, but oh no, Pinoe insists on karaoke and you listen! We wouldn’t be here if we just stuck with darts. We never listen to Pinoe! Why would we do that now?!”

Pinoe perks up from afar, hearing her name. “Keep your panties on, Carl!”

Sam speaks calmly, “It’s really, okay, Carli…I don’t mind. It was just one game of pool. We can come back another time and-”

“Are you giving up on me?!” Carli turns to Sam, sending her a look of betrayal. “We don’t give up. You understand? I’m tired and I want to be anyone else but here, but we’ve been challenged. We don’t give up ever.”

Pinoe shouts back, “Guys, quit the bitching. Let’s go! Alex and Allie found us another bar, just a couple blocks down.” The three of them begin to lead the way.

Hope sees a bright yellow taxi turn on the street (finally). “Oh, thank god. Guys, my ride is here. Take Kelley.” She gently pushes her forward.

Sonnet looks at them, confusion etched on her face. “She’s not going back with you?”

“Hey, that’s a great idea!” Kelley looks up at her, excitement building.

“No, it’s a terrible idea.” Hope cuts off Kelley. She tries not to overthink the fact that her teammate would think she and Kelley were leaving together. Hope walks towards the taxi, placing a hand on the door handle. She’s close to her escape, but she can already tell things are only going downhill from here. “I’m going straight to bed when I get back.”

“Now you’re talking.” Kelley winks, and Hope feels warmth rising to her face and she’s never been more grateful for the darkness outside.

“Look, she’s drunk- like too drunk- to come out with us anymore.” Becky points out, “Can’t you just make sure she gets back to the hotel in one piece?”

“Oh no you don’t…” Hope shakes her head, now opening the door of the taxi. “You cannot just leave me alone with her.”

“I’ll be good, I promise!” Kelley begs, her eyes widening almost to the point that Hope can’t say no.

“See? She promises, Hope!” Becky chuckles and then continues seriously, “Please just take care of her for us, okay?”

“Well of course I would.” Hope glares, resigning. She doesn’t know where the night is heading, but she also wants to find out. She beckons, “Okay, come on, Kelley.”

“Really?!” Kelley’s eyes shine as she skips over to Hope. She gushes, “You’re so kind.”

Carli is heard yelling at them to hurry up. Becky sighs heavily, “Okay we have to go before your best friend rips us a new one.” She fishes into her pockets, “Here’s our room key. I’m guessing we won’t be back or quite awhile. You can leave it at the front desk or I’ll probably just crash somewhere else. See you later!” She and Emily jog after the rest of their team.

“Bye.” Hope barely gets out, before realizing and calling out, “Wait, Becky, why would you crash somewhere else?! I’m not staying with her!” She hears distant laughter and lets out a heavy sigh. She’s about to step into the car when Kelley startles her.

“Curb! Curb!” Kelley’s pointing towards the ground at their feet.

“Yeah, I know.” Hope says, “Come on, just watch your step.”

“You watch your step.”

Hope gives her a stern look, “Get in the damn taxi, Kelley.” She grips the younger woman’s shoulders, guiding her in.

“Help! Help! I’m being kidnapped!” Kelley jokes, struggling against Hope’s touch until she’s well situated in the back.

Hope apologizes to the driver, “Hi, thanks for waiting.” She leans further forward and whispers. “If you can get us back to the Marriott on 6th street in less than twenty minutes, I’ll tip you extra.”

They begin to move and Hope notices Kelley fidgeting. She sighs, “Will you keep still?”

“You’re no fun.” Kelley frowns, frantically touching everything all at once to spite her seatmate in the back.

Hope yawns, “Please, I’m tired.”

Kelley now occupies herself with the little button on the inside of the door handle. The window slowly rolls down, and then up….and back down….and back up. Hope closes her eyes and silently prays for patience. She hears Kelley and by the sound of her voice, she already knows her eyes are bright with no good. “Oh! I want this to be like that one movie!”

“What movi--Jesus, Kelley! Get back in here!” Half of Kelley’s body is hanging out of the window, and she knows that if she doesn’t do something in the next ten seconds, their ride would include a visit to the emergency room. She reaches across the back seat to grab Kelley’s waist.

“This is the dream!” Kelley shouts, the cool breeze sending her hair in all sorts of directions. She frowns as she feels herself being reeled back in. “Hope…” She whines loudly, “Let me live for a few more seconds!”

“Sit down and I’ll let you live for the rest of your life.”

Kelley struggles for good measure. She looks down at Hope’s strong grip, and when she lifts her head, a smirk forms. “You can’t keep your hands off me, can you?”

“No, I cannot.” Hope watches as Kelley’s brows wiggle, teasing her. She almost laughs, but keeps it together because- well, she’s an adult.

“I think it’s nice.” Kelley’s cheeky smile is both irritating and cute.

“Well I think it’s necessary.” Hope rolls her eyes, freeing a hand to reach around Kelley and roll the window back up. Kelley responds by hovering a finger around the button, the window going back down. “Roll it back up, Kelley, I’m cold.” Hope feels the temperature of the taxi continue to drop.

“Well I’m h-o-double-t-hott.”

“Not funny.” Hope’s expression is serious. When Kelley fails to listen, she raises her voice, “Quit playing with that!”

“Okay, Mom.” Kelley sticks out her tongue in a childish manner.

“Don’t test me.”

“Fine, fine, I’m sorry.” Kelley puts her hands up apologetically, but there’s a spark of trouble still evident in her eyes. She clears her throat. “You can let go now.”

Only now does Hope notice her hands, dangerously placed at Kelley’s hips. She lets go immediately without a word and moves closer to her side of the vehicle. She looks out the window and feels warmth creep up her neck. She hopes Kelley doesn’t notice (oh but she does).

It’s quiet, but only for a minute. Kelley can’t stop playing with the zipper on her leather jacket and it’s not even that loud, but Hope hears it ringing in her ears. “Psst…psst…Hope?”

Hope reluctantly turns her head to the side, whispering, “Yes, Kelley?”

“Do you want to know a secret?” Kelley asks in a hushed whisper.

“No, but you’re going to tell me anyways, aren’t you?”

Kelley giggles, sharing, “I haven’t been this drunk since the World Cup.”

Hope knows it won’t do any good trying to convince her otherwise so she brings a hand to her chest, appalled, “No! The World Cup?!”

“Shhh! Shhh!” Kelley hushes her, moving closer to Hope. “Keep it on the down low! You can’t tell anyone.”

“Your secret’s safe with me.” Hope promises.

“Pinky swear?” Kelley adds.

“I swear.”

“No, Hope, pinky swear?” Kelley emphasizes, bringing her last digit of her hand up in front of Hope’s face. It’s ridiculous.

“Kelley…”

“Come on, you gotta do it! You gotta!” Kelley whines until Hope can’t do anything other than hook their fingers together to shut her up. Kelley literally has her wrapped around her fingers.

Kelley, of course, is far from done. She sighs loudly, and then again and again. Hope sees their hotel in the far distance; she just needs to last another five minutes or so. “Do you have something else you want to say?”

“Well, not really. It’s just…well, things were so different back then.” There’s a raw honesty underlying Kelley’s voice, and Hope wants to hear more.

“It’s only been a year.” Hope responds.

“Things were so good.” Kelley’s short statement makes Hope think. Kelley wasn’t wrong. They had been on top of the world- they still were, but in a different way. The road to Vancouver wasn’t an easy one, but when they arrived, it was like life had only just begun. They played like they never played before, and loved the game fiercely. They won, but they were hungry for more. They would have that chance to make history at Rio.

Hope peruses, “I know you’re drunk right now, but if we’re going to have this conversation, I’m going to need a little context around ‘things’.”

“Everything. The tournament, the team, my role on the team-”

“Hey, you’ve earned your starting spot.” Hope cuts her short. She doesn’t understand why Kelley’s still second guessing herself.

“Sure. Maybe.” Kelley looks down, shielding herself from Hope’s intense stare. She asks timidly, “But am I ready?”

“You’ve been ready since London. You played every minute with me. I know, Kell, you’re a good player.”

“But the team is so different now. I just don’t feel connected to as many people as I did back then. I don’t know who I can lean on, both on or off the field. I can’t juggle a relationship outside my career. It’s too hard and I…I’m going to die alone.”

Hope watches Kelley’s insecurities unfold in front of her, escalating at a rapid pace. She knows she’s not exactly coherent at the moment, but she knows that these thoughts are coming from deep within nevertheless. She confronts her, “Whoa, slow down. You are not going to die alone.”

“How do you know?” Kelley stresses.

“Because…” Hope is careful with her next words. “Because you’ll have me.” The instant flicker in Kelley’s eyes makes her realize that she hadn’t been careful enough.

“Oh! Oh-”

“No-”

“-Oh! I have an idea.” Kelley scoots unbelievable close, her voice low. “If we’re both like 40 and still single, we have to get married, okay?”

“Yep, there it is.” Hope knew this conversation was inevitable, especially with Kelley in such a state. She plays along for the second time- somewhere along the ride, she’s given up on fighting all logic and reason. “Let’s elope in Vegas. That’s one everyone does!”

“That’s what I was going to say! I like it! Quick and dirty!” Kelley grins, and Hope’s breath hitches. “You know what, Hope? You are my soulmate.” Hope can’t help but laugh, now that finger guns are involved. Kelley smiles, too, cocking her head to the side, “What’s so funny?”

“You are hammered.”

“I am not! I mean it, Hope, I really do. You’re my soulmate!” Kelley’s voice increases in volume.

Hope makes eye contact with the driver in the front, and he’s laughing with them. She shifts her look back to Kelley. “I’m sorry, Kell, but I’m kind of taken.”

“Only kind of?” Kelley tests.

“I’m very much taken.” Hope repeats, holding her hand up and pointing to her ring. “See?”

“Oh.” Kelley deflates back into the seat. She realizes, “So I am going to die alone.”

“No!” Hope wants to chuckle, but she keeps her tone at bay. “No, you won’t, I promise. You have me-as a friend,” She quickly clarifies, her eyes softening. “You will always have me.” Maybe it’s the way Kelley looks back at her or maybe it’s the sudden realization that their night was just beginning that causes her heart to pound against her chest, but she had spoken the truth. She meant every word.

“Thanks, Hope.” Kelley’s hands are now playing with the ends of hers sweater (Hope’s not at all surprised). “You’re pretty lucky, you know, to have found your soulmate.”

Hope just stares at Kelley. She truly was. But she finds herself telling her, “Marriage isn’t all that it seems, Kell.”

“No.” Kelley refuses to believe, “No, it has to be with you. Anyone would be so lucky to be with you.” Hope doesn’t know how to answer; she’s in no place, anyways. Kelley’s hands have ventured to her legs now. She swallows, “Your hands, Kelley.”

Kelley responds nonchalantly, “I know.” She winks. “Now, we’re even.”

Hope is wide awake now. The taxi driver announces their arrival and Hope quickly fumbles with cash in her wallet. She grabs Kelley’s hand, leading her up the steps and through the lobby. The elevator ride is incredibly long- Hope spends the entire time prying Kelley’s hands away. They really shouldn’t be left alone any longer.

Hope finally opens Kelley’s hotel room. She sighs in relief. They had made it back without any problems (yet). She busies herself with tidying things around the room, telling Kelley, “Get ready for bed.”

“Now you’re talking.”

Hope freezes, deciding no response is the best response. She continues around the room until she hears Kelley. “A little help over here?”

Hope turns around, and she realizes that maybe she shouldn’t have let Kelley get ready alone. She sighs, helping her take off her shirt. Hope tries not to look, hastily tripping over a pile of clothes on the way to the bathroom. She fills up a glass of water and rummages for a bottle of aspirin. She returns and Kelley still doesn’t have a shirt on. Go figure.

“I can’t find a clean shirt.” (No shit, Kelley.) She looks at the items in Hope’s hands. “Are those for me?”

“What?” Hope can only stare before blinking back to reality, to responsibility. “Oh yeah, yeah…it’ll help with the hangover in the morning.” She puts everything down on the nightstand.

Kelley slowly climbs into bed. “Thanks for taking care of me, Hope.”

“You can thank me when you have a shirt on.” Hope turns around again, looking for a clean shirt- or really, a dirty one would do at this point. She hears Kelley climb back out of bed, and she feels her dangerously close.

“I don’t need a shirt.”

“You—you’re going to get cold.” Hope stutters. The minute she turns around it’s over.

“It feels pretty hot to me.” Kelley replies huskily, placing her hands on Hope’s hips. Now, she really can’t concentrate.

“F-found it! I found it! Here!” Hope whips around, taking the shirt and pushing it against Kelley’s chest.

Kelley doesn’t move, their faces only inches apart. She places a hand on top of Hope’s, still holding the article of clothing in place. “I’m not saying this because I’m drunk right now, but I love you, Hope.” She steals a quick glimpse at her lips. “Like a lot.”

“I…I know you do.” Hope barely gets out, amidst a swirl of responsibility, excessive pining, and desire. Hope feels Kelley’s touch fueled by the alcohol coursing through her veins; it commands her to no control. All Hope can think about now is that Kelley’s body is pressed up against her own and that she wants her- sober.

The t-shirt falls to the floor.

#taxi #exes #my fics

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