socialstoriesforneurotypicals

[socialstoriesforneurotypicals]

AUctober Day 20: Special Interests

One thing that I have noticed about my special interests throughout the years is that they tend to be related to four common themes: diseases, animals, machines, and psychology.

For example, my interests in rabies and cholera fall under the category of diseases; my interests in cars, HVAC equipment, tornado sirens, and trains fall under the category of machines; my interest in Guinea pigs, chinchillas, dogs, and raccoons fall under the category of animals; and my interests in neurodiversity, astrology, and Myers-Briggs personality types fall under the category of psychology.

Do your special interest fall into categories? I’d so, what are those categories?

[socialstoriesforneurotypicals]

AUctober Day 19: Echolalia

Echolalia is a common form of communication used by autistic people. It refers to the repeating of a word or phrase, either continuously or immediately after it is said. This form of communication can serve many purposes, and the specific purpose that it serves depends on the individual. For me, echolalia serves 2 primary purposes. One of these is a stim. I will repeat a word or a phrase over and over because I like the way it sounds. The second way is to help me process information. Hearing a verbal instruction twice helps me to better comprehend it.

[socialstoriesforneurotypicals]

AUctober Day 17: My Sensory Profile

Many people have a misconception that all autistic people are hypersensitive to stimuli. The reality is that autistic people can be hyposensitive, and for many of us, how we experience each sense is on a sort of spectrum. Here, to provide an example, is my specific sensory profile:

Hearing: hypersensitive. I am become very overwhelmed by loud noises, or just a lot of noise happening at simultaneously around me

Visual: hypersensitive. I have difficulty going outside when it is super sunny out. I get very overwhelmed by clutter. I have to keep my screen brightness at a low level

Vestibular: hypersensitive. I am prone to motion sickness.

Smell/taste: hyposensitive. I don’t like bland foods. I need foods with a lot of flavor. I constantly smell things to provide myself with olfactory input

Touch: hyposensitive. I don’t like being touched lightly, as it feels ticklish and uncomfortable. I need pressure to be applied whenever I’m being touched

Proprioception: hyposensitive. I have a very difficult time telling where my body is in space. I struggle in large crowds because I feel like I am way too close to everyone.

[socialstoriesforneurotypicals]

AUctober Day 16: My Unmasking Story

When I was 4 years old, I was diagnosed by with autism. For the next couple years, I had a vague idea of what that meant. I heard the word thrown around occasionally by my parents; and I knew that they typically used it when they were talking about me. I knew that “autism” was the reason why I had to get pulled out of class for occupational and speech therapy, why I had an exaggerated reaction to my emotions and to loud noises, and why I did some things that other kids didn’t do, like obsessing over air conditioners or flapping my hands. At the same time, I didn’t fully understand what it meant to be autistic. That would soon change.

When I was around 11, I looked up autism on YouTube out of curiosity, and came across a video of a nonverbal autistic woman named Carly Fleischmann, who typed on a computer to communicate. Although Carly’s support needs are vastly different from mine, many of the things she said resonated with me. For example, in one clip the man who was interviewing Carly asked her why autistic people “flap their hands, cover their ears, hum, and rock”. Carly told him that these actions help her block out sensory input, which can be overloading to autistic people. She explained to him that [autistic people’s] brains are wired differently, and take in many different sounds and conversations all at once. Hearing this was like a lightbulb lit up in my head. While I knew that I flapped my hands and did other repetitive movements known as “stimming”, and that I didn’t like loud noises, I never realized that those two idiosyncrasies were connected.

I became inspired to do more research and saw posts from other autistic people, describing their unique ways of experiencing the world, many of which I related to. Certain aspects of my life started to make sense, and I began to realize that there were thousands of other human beings out there who were just like me. I learned that autism wasn’t just this lifelong condition that I was stuck with, but rather my identity.
I began to be more open about my diagnosis. I “came out” as autistic to a few of my close friends, began posting about it on social media, and even gave a talk about it to my seventh-grade class! In middle school, my autism didn’t seem to produce much of a barrier to my friendships. I went to a small grade school, so my friends either knew that I was autistic already (word gets around in a small school), or had just gotten used to my “quirks”. High school, however, proved to be a different story.

I graduated middle school with a solid group of friends and a confident mindset. Unfortunately, this group of friends broke apart once we got to high school, and so I was forced to find a new group of friends. I chose not to disclose my autism to my new classmates. Looking back, I’m not entirely sure why I made this decision, given how much I had learned to accept myself over the previous 3 years. I now know that was a grave mistake. Instead of remaining true to myself, I began to hide myself in an attempt to fit in.

I diligently observed other girls in my grade, and took note of how they interacted with each other, what they talked about, and what they liked and disliked, and then took those observations and made them part of my own personality. No matter how hard I tried though, I never seemed to be quite the right shape for the mold, which caused me to have mental health issues throughout my first year of high school. One day in the Spring, I was talking to a therapist, and she said something that really resonated with me. She told me that I was spending so much time and energy trying to be like everybody else, and that I should instead just focus on being myself. At first, I was skeptical, but then I thought about it some more. I thought about how anxious and exhausted I was trying to observe and memorize all of the social nuances, and then I thought back to middle school days, and how relaxed and happy I was just being myself, and decided to take my therapist’s suggestion into consideration.

I became more and more comfortable in my own skin. I stopped trying to force people to like me for who I pretended to be, and instead focused on those who seemed fond of who I really am. This was by no means easy. You see, being yourself is perhaps the most difficult sense of vulnerability one can experience. However, in the long run, it is so much better for you mentally and spiritually.

To this day, I still don’t have a ton of close friends. I don’t hang out with a huge group of girls every single weekend. And that’s okay. Throughout my Freshman year, I was under the impression that my friendships had to look the same as everyone else’s. After learning more about who I truly am, I realized that friendship is personal, and not everybody socializes in the same manner. There is no “right or wrong way” to make friends; how you, as an individual form friendships is valid.

I came to a realization that deep down inside, everyone appreciates individuality over conformity. Once I started being more confident in my personality, people seemed to start interacting with me more. It became easier for me to join into conversations without feeling like I was a hamburger being shoved inside a hot dog bun.

I’m not going to pretend that my mental health is perfect now. I still struggle a bit, and I probably always will. However, learning how to be my authentic self has caused the burden of these issues to lessen significantly.

[socialstoriesforneurotypicals]

Auctober Day 14: Verbal stimming

I described my verbal stims for my AUctober day 1 post, but here is a list for today:

- tongue clicking and lip popping: I do these two when I am bored or thinking about something. I actually started to lip pop when I was writing this post!

- babbling and humming: I do these when I am overloaded with auditory information. I find that they both help me tune out unpleasant sounds.

How do you verbally stim, and why do you do it in that way?

[socialstoriesforneurotypicals]

AUctober Day 12: Sensory Euphoria

According to The American Heritage Dictionary of the English Language: 5th Edition, euphoria means “an excited state of joy, a good feeling, a state of intense happiness”. Here are some sensory related things that achieve this for me:

- feeling a soft, fluffy texture

- warm, fall-like scents, such as coffee, pumpkin, apple, or vanilla

- Listening to classical and renaissance music.

- being outside when the weather is nice

[socialstoriesforneurotypicals]

AUctober Day 11: Neurodivergent Community

The neurodivergent community is comprised of a wide variety of individuals. Since starting this account, I have been fortunate enough to follow many wonderful neurodivergent influencers. Here are just a few of my favorite accounts:

- Afriendforlillybug: Lilly is an adorable nonspeaking, autistic 9-year-old whose mom runs her account. Her mom has started a nonprofit, Lilly’s voice, which helps provide AAC devices for other nonspeaking individuals

- Autmazing: Cammie is an autistic woman who has an autistic husband and 5 autistic children. Her account demonstrates that it is entirely possible to live a happy and fulfilling life when your entire family is diagnosed with autism

- theexpertally: Yulika is an autistic IEP consultant who specializes in helping to write neurodivergent affirming IEP goals

- theautisticats: although this account is inactive, their posts were immensely helpful in my understanding of myself. The page is still up as an archive

- myautisticsoul: Ollie is a non-binary, autistic human who helps others to see the beauty in having autism. They also have a marvelous Great Dane service dog named Albus

- breakwithshaiden: Shaiden is an 11-year-old black, autistic, motivational speaker. His videos are super informative and entertaining

- fidgetsandfries: Tiffy is a black, autistic woman who has two autistic sons. She writes about the nuances and challenges of being both autistic and a person of color. Also, her eldest son, Aidan, is nonspeaking, and she recently published a book about him. It’s called “A Day without Words”. You all should go check it out. There is a link in her bio

[socialstoriesforneurotypicals]

Auctober Day 10: Self Care

Self care is important for all people. It is especially important for us neurodivergent folk, as we experience higher levels of stress and anxiety in our daily lives. Here are some ways that I like to take care of myself

- Every Saturday, I have a spa day. I take a long, hot shower, and do a face and hair mask. This helps me rejuvenate after a long week

- As a religious person, I find prayer to be very beneficial for my mental health. I like to say a decade of the rosary in the morning to help me get into a peaceful mindset for the day. At night, I do prayer journaling, where I thank God for good things that happened in my day and pray about the bad things. I have found that it is good for me to take the time to reflect on my day

- I also enjoy reading and spending time outside. I love to lose myself in the world of a good book, and being surrounded by nature gives me a sense of tranquility. Bonus points if I can read AND be outside simultaneously

How do you take care of yourself?

[socialstoriesforneurotypicals]

AUctober day 9: Comfort food

I have to admit; I am a bit of an outlier in the autistic community. I don’t have very many sensory issues surrounding food, so I eat a pretty varied diet. Still, though, I do have a few “comfort foods” that I tend to gravitate towards. One food in particular is cheese. Believe it or not, cheese actually has a similar effect on the brain as chocolate. It triggers our dopamine sensors, so it can become very addicting. For me, my two favorite types of cheeses are Brie and sharp white cheddar.

[socialstoriesforneurotypicals]

AUctober day 6: Hyperfocus

As someone with both Autism and ADHD, I am especially prone to hyperfocus. I have found throughout the years that it is both good and bad. For example, hyperfocusing on a paper that I need to write is good because I am able to get the paper done quickly and efficiently. However, there are also times when I hyperfocus on my phone when I am supposed to be doing something productive, and so I don’t complete the task that I need to do. This often leads to me feeling incredibly frustrated.

In your experience, do you see hyperfocus as something good or bad? A bit of both?

[socialstoriesforneurotypicals]

Auctober Day 2: Infodumping!

Happy Auctober! Today’s theme is infodumping. Like many of you, I have been discouraged from infodumping. In middle school, my special interest was (and still is, to some extent), tornado sirens. I saw a speech therapist who forced me to talk about other topics. Meanwhile, my neurotypical friend could talk about Dylan O’Brien nonstop and no one batted and eye. Just goes to show all of the double standards that we, as autistic people, have to deal with.

But rest assured, this post is a safe place. Infodump all you want! Don’t worry about being annoying or boring. This page is meant for autism and adhd! Tell me about one or more of your special interests in the comments

[socialstoriesforneurotypicals]

Auctober day 1: Stimming

Happy auctober! Here are some of my stims and why I do them.

Hand flapping: I do this when I am happy, anxious or understimulated. When I get nervous, my hands get really tingly, and flapping them helps to relieve that feeling. Flapping my hands also provides me with stimulation when there isn’t enough in my environment

Tensing up: I do this when I am feeling an intense emotion; typically either angry or happy. Oftentimes it isn’t caused by something happening at the moment, but rather an internal thought. When I was little, my mom was actually concerned that I was having seizures because of this stim

Jumping/bouncing: I do this when I am excited or understimulated. Sometimes I get so excited that I physically need to let my energy out. Like flapping my hands, jumping and bouncing can provide me with stimulation that my environment cannot

Babbling/humming: I do both of these when I am overstimulated, particularly by noise. Making my own noises helps to block out external ones

Obviously, these are not all of my stims. There are several more, but it would take me three whole posts to list all of them. What are some of your stims? Why do you engage in them?

[socialstoriesforneurotypicals]

Why many autistic teens/adults enjoy “kids shows”

The episodes are short; usually only 10-20 minutes. Many of us have a short attention span (and may also have ADHD, making our attention span especially limited), so the short episodes prevent us from losing focus

The plot lines are very predictable and straightforward. For those of us who struggle with anxiety over not knowing what is going to happen next, plot twists, and so forth, the predictably of kids shows provides a level of comfort that more “adult” shows might not

The message and language in kids’ shows are easy to grasp. Just like in real life, many adult shows often have hidden meanings, use of figurative language, etc. Most kids' shows, however, lack these elements or have a very minimum amount of them. This makes it easier for us to follow along with the plot line and understand what is happening

[socialstoriesforneurotypicals]

The Negative Effects of Technology on ADHD

Technology has many benefits for Neurodivergent individuals. Communication apps, alarms, scheduling apps, and even mediation apps all provide wonderful tools for helping us succeed in the world. Despite these benefits, however, technology does have its downsides.

Technology is incredibly easy to hyperfocus on. Watching TikTok, scrolling through Instagram, and sending and receiving messages all provide our brains with dopamine, making it nearly impossible for us to set our phones down. Unfortunately, looking at a screen for too long can lead to headaches and irritability. Those of us who have ADHD may become so focused on our phones that we neglect to eat or drink, and become dysregulated.

To help me cope with this, I have started to apply two methods. The first one is setting a time limit on certain apps. This prevents me from scrolling endlessly for hours at a time. The second is setting an alarm for one hour after I pick up my phone. The alarm reminds me to take a break from looking at a screen and take a walk or read a book.

[socialstoriesforneurotypicals]

Working a Job that relates to your Special Interest

As a neurodivergent person, you may find it beneficial to work in a field that pertains to one of your long-time special interests. Engaging in your special interests provides you with dopamine, which in turn helps you to stay focused and motivated in your work. Additionally, you are likely to have a high level of expertise in the area, making you an ideal employee.

Speaking from personal experience, I am currently in college and am majoring in Homeland Security with a minor in Disaster Management. Natural disasters and disaster management have both been long time special interests of mine, since I was in preschool. Although my classes are certainly a lot of work, I find myself to be very motivated and oftentimes actually enjoying the work, as it relates to my special interest.

To provide another interest, my dad, who is also neurodivergent, has a special interest in Catholicism. He has been working for the Catholic Church for the approximately 30 years and is very successful in his work. I do not doubt that his success is largely contributed to his natural interest in religion.

If you work within your special interest, please comment and let me know what you do!

[socialstoriesforneurotypicals]

Strengths of Neurodivergent Workers

A few weeks ago, I posted about some weaknesses and challenges that neurodivergent people may possess in the workplace. Somebody commented and suggested that I post about some strengths instead. So, without further ado, here is a list of possible strengths that a neurodivergent worker may bring to the table:

Attention to detail. One trait of autism is focusing on the smaller details instead of the big picture. This means that we are more inclined to complete a task thoroughly, as we want to make sure every little detail is perfect

Sensitivity. Despite popular stereotypes, those of us with autism and ADHD can be highly sensitive people. This means that we are more empathetic towards our fellow employees, and may excel in jobs where a degree of sensitivity is needed, such as social work. We also have a strong sense of justice, which is a much-needed asset in today’s society

Hyper focus. Our ability to hyper focus means that if we are interested in and motivated by a task, we can accomplish it throughly and efficiently. This ability is strengthened when the task pertains to one of our special interests

These are just a few of the many work-related strengths that neurodivergent individuals possess. Obviously, there are many more. If you are anxious about hiring a worker with autism, ADHD, or something similar, know that they may end up being one of the best employees on your team

[socialstoriesforneurotypicals]

Why Autistic/ADHD People Can’t Just “Work Harder”

When those of us who have autism, ADHD, or some other type of invisible disability inform people of our condition and the struggles associated with it, we are often meant with this response: “just work harder”. While this statement may come from a place of genuine encouragement, here is why many of us take offense to it.

To start, let's take the phrase “just work harder” and apply it to other, more visible disabilities. If someone was in a wheelchair and had limited mobility, would you tell them that they needed to “just work harder” and figure out how to walk? Probably not. You can physically see that their legs do not function as able-bodied people do, so you understand that they cannot simply learn how to walk. Similarly, if you knew someone was Deaf/HOH, would you tell them that they needed to “work harder” and figure out how to hear better? Again, the answer is most likely no. With the knowledge that they are Deaf/HOH, you understand that their ears do not receive as much input as hearing people, if they receive input at all, so you know that they can’t just learn how to hear.

Because invisible disabilities are, by literal definition, invisible, many people do not take them seriously. However, just because a person looks the same as everyone else on the outside, doesn’t mean they aren’t different on the inside. Studies have shown that there are physical differences in the brains of those with autism and or ADHD than those without. In other words, our brains are wired to perceive information and act in certain ways. And like a person in a wheelchair can’t just learn how to walk, we can’t just go and re-wire our brains. You might not be able to see our disabilities, but they are just as valid, and the things that we struggle with as a result are just as real.