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job interviewer: so what would you say your biggest flaw in the workplace is?

me, sweating and losing my mind bc the job interviewer is an eldritch monstrosity with uncountable eyes whose lashes are grasping fingers, twisting and twining, reaching out to hold, to caress, to grasp, to maim, desperate for any and every kind of physical connection with my all-too-euclidean body: my pull out game could really use some practice

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Can i take a dive in your ocean….

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Who up ashing they bowl

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Breast Augmentation sounds awesome they should augment them with laser cannons

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Watching ice age with some friends and none of them agree that The Hot Weasel is hot

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Listened to I love it in the shower, life changing

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she broke up with her loser boyfriend!!!!

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you post about wanting to "get that man pregnant" and yet you then complain about children existing. i dont think you deserve to get him pregnant. i dont think youd treat him well.

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I <3 DP

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Placing my laptop on my bed while I play The Sims 4 so it can heat up my mattress like hot coals

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Gogle how.toi stop wildshap,e

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Hang his ass on the meat hook

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Call me teenage mutant ninja turtles the way I’m in that manhole

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remember if you wake up feeling sick and your whole body hurts the best course of action is to jack off and moan like a girl