snappingturt3ls

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''Everyone at school is afraid of my girlfriend'' - Short Comic

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I mean, he kinda is a mad scientist, he just still has (most) of his morals intact

Love the 'Danny goes to live X place bc of needing ambient ecto to be a healthy boi', but I'm also a sucker for smart engineering Danny.

So, give this man an ecto-inhaler! Give him an ecto-patch like a nicotine patch! Give him an ecto-pump like an insulin pump for difficult battles!

His parents make weird things out of everyday objects, let Danny reforge medical accommodations to be ecto-support!

What I'm tryna say is, be free, Danny!

And not be stuck with getting shots cuz needles are bleh.

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Smallville is no stranger to "Totally not a Metahuman" neighbors.

So! When Jonathan and Martha Kent one day turned up with a Baby, supposedly an at home birth despite the baby clearly being at least a year old and Martha have never had a baby bump, most of the town just went with it.

They assumed it was an Abandoned Baby situation, and the Kent's wanted to avoid all of the legal hurdles of adoption, so whenever asked they would say "Oh yeah, Martha definitely had a visible Baby Bump a few years ago." "Of course she had an at home birth, the town doctor will absolutely testify to helping deliver Clark." "Why does he look nothing like his parents? Genetics are weird and complicated, I'm a farmer, I don't study that shit, get off my lawn."

When they noticed that Clark was just a little stronger than most kids, they wrote it off.

When they noticed he could easily catch up to sprinting dogs when playing in the fields, they just praised him for his athleticism.

When one of them saw him jumping onto the roof of their house to get a Frisbee, they just told him to be careful.

Why were they so non-chalant about all of those things? Well because they had dealt with all that stuff and more a few years ago, when Mr Fenton and his daughter Ellie moved in.

It was practically the exact same situation, only in their case Daniel was there to help teach his daughter about how to use their clear Metahuman Powers. The Kent's weren't Metahumans, and before long they realized that they were out of their depth when raising a meta baby who could leap over a Barn in a single hop. So they went to Daniel for help.

And help he did, because in the following years they would attest to Daniel being the only reason they came out of Clark's childhood with their house intact.

He taught the boy how to control his strength so he wouldn't hurt others, how to restrain himself when he was excited so he wouldn't float off into the sky, and most importantly, how to keep it a secret when others not in the Know were around.

He told the story of how he and his daughter had come to Smallville, persecuted by the government and disowned by his own parents, forced to run away from everything he had ever known to keep himself and Ellie safe. It really made Clark appreciate his own Ma and Pa more than ever.

It also helped that he had "Cousin Ellie" to play with as a kid, since he always had to he careful around the other kids. It was honestly a relief to her as well, considering she could only ever play with her Dad or the Meta-Dog that visited their home once in a while.

Years later, when Clark was raising his own kid, he looked to his Uncle Daniel for guidance.

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Gotham's New Private Detective

So! When Wes finally proved that Danny and Phantom were one in the same, he had expected to feel so much better about it.

Instead all he could feel was bile rising up his throat, every time he thought back to that fateful day when he presented all of his evidence to the school. It was supposed to be a "Gotcha!" Moment, to have Danny admit he was right so he could move on with his life. Instead, as peoples heads began to turn to Danny in shock, all he could see on the boys face was horror.

It wasn't until later that day, when he saw on the news that the Fentons had engaged in a huge battle with Phantom in the middle of the street, that he realized he had fucked up.

It wasn't until he was standing over Danny's mutilated body, having broken into the Fentons Lab just to ease his worries, that he realized just how Badly he had Fucked Up.

From there his actions were a blur.

He could vaguely remember prying the restrains off of Danny with a crowbar, hurriedly wrapping up the worst of his injuries, and hauling him onto his back. He could also remember using his experience as a 3am YouTube prowler to hot wire a random Car parked on the side of the street, and floor it as far out of the City as the gas tank would allow.

He could also remember the burning Hatred in Danny's eyes as he eased him into the Back Seat.

When the Car he had stolen ran out of Gas, he pulled into a parking lot and stole another, this time driving off into a completely different direction. He repeated this a few times.

Eventually the landed in Gotham City, not Wes's first choice, but to be honest it was one of the better places to hide from the authorities. The Police there were famously incompetent (and corrupt), so there was very little chance he and Danny would he found.

From there he tried his best to help Danny. He found a back alley doctor who agreed to stitch him up discreetly, though it took most all of the money he had hastily taken out of his personal savings account (there goes his College fund), and then found an abandoned apartment building they could use to sleep. The remainder of his savings went into making the place livable.

A part time job at a local shop was enough to pay for some Groceries for himself and Danny, but not much else. He made liberal use of Gym Showers, and helped Danny stumble there as well when he wanted one. Aside from that, Danny barely interacted with him.

And he understood. Really, he did. Wes had Ruined his Life.

Despite everything else he had tried to do for Danny in the past few weeks, it was still his fault and his fault alone that Danny was in this situation.

He knew that there was a high chance that Danny would never forgive him. He also knew there was a 100% chance that he would spend the rest of his life trying to atone for his mistake.

As time went on, Wes provided for himself and Danny with his part time job, and kept his head down. He knew the kind of trouble he could get into if he stuck his nose into other peoples business. He swore he would never do so again.

But...

...Well, there was a case on the News about a murder that took place a few blocks away from their building. And in a moment of weakness, Wes had decided to look up the specifics of the case. Then he dug a little deeper, and deeper, and before he knew it he had linked it to 2 other murders and had figured out who the Killer was.

But he couldn't act on it, he just couldn't. He had sworn to himself that he would keep his nose out of other peoples business...but this was important wasn't it? More people would die if the murderer was left to run free...but the Bats or Police would probably be able to solve it on their own right?

Except it had been a week already since he had figured it out. And if he was right, the Killer would strike again soon...so maybe...just this once...?

(And thus, Gotham City got a new Private Detective. Not a costumed vigilante or a dangerous metahuman. Just a concerned citizen, trying to make up for the terrible mistakes he made in his past.)

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it does still make me insane specifically how many queer people lovingly embrace astrology. I went to a poetry workshop yesterday that was genuinely quite good but also included an option to disclose astrology designations during introductions and so many people broke out some variation of "I'm a [x] sum but I have a [y] placement and it SHOWS" girl no it doesn't. that's meaningless correlation you completely invented the causation

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i know i joke about rent-lowering gunshots but i cannot emphasize enough that incest and rape kinks are extremely common. wildly popular. this is something that a lot of people fantasize about, because it’s an easily accessible taboo, it intrigues/scares/interests people and there’s a lot of content out there to absorb about it. it’s really not that out there or extreme to have those fetishes; we are talking top charters on pornhub of all places.

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Was scrolling through AO3 and found this gem

Enemy to parent is a trope we have to popularise lmao

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there are certain . . . downsides. to giving the batman your phone number. and being known, to his family, as nothing more detailed than "that one sorcerer"

it leads to certain . . . miscoummunications regarding what you do

constantine: *answers phone* who is this dick: is this the magic man? constantine: constantine: i desperately wish it weren't dick: good. how quickly can you get to gotham and erase the memories of an entire gala full of people constantine: *internally* what the fuck what the fuck what the-- constantine: uh, never. that isn't a part of my skillset dick: dammit. booze-induced memory loss, then constantine: im pretty sure that's not medically recommended dick: neither is the other option, concussions for all constantine: what even- dick: *hangs up* constantine: *bangs head on table* i'm sure i'll hear about this in the news tomorrow

constantine: *picks up phone while smoking* zatanna, if this is another prank ca-- damian: John. constantine: *chokes on cig* what the fu-- damian: how much would one have to pay for you to magically repair a tooth constantine: constantine: *morbidly curious* repair how much? damian: put it back in the mouth constantine: you do know i ain't a dentist, right damian: i am fully aware. price? constantine: dude i can't even do that. as i said, i ain't a denti-- damian: *hangs up* constantine: i gotta stop givin' out my number.

phone: *rings* constantine: *groans and lets it go to voicemail* phone: *rings again* constantine: *lets it go to voicemail again* phone: *Rings a--* constantine: *picks up* DAMMIT YOU MOTHERFUCKER, I AIN'T A MAID AT EVERY SUPERHERO'S BECK AND CALL-- jason: not a hero constantine: --ESPECIALLY WHEN YA DON'T PAY FOR SH---wait what jason: not a hero constantine: constantine: and what, may i ask, the fuck are you? jason: mob boss and walking corpse constantine: constantine:

constantine: okay, mister mob boss, i'll bite. tha fuck do ya want jason: hypothetically speaking-- constantine: fuck jason: --were one to have encountered the loch ness monster-- constantine: fuck jason: --but living in a lasarus pit-- constantine: *stress smoking* FUCK jason: --what would one do constantine: FUCK

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DP X DC PROMPT

Phantom met the Justice League when a ghost decided to fight Superman. During that fight Danny mentions something about Time Travel. Clark of course heard this.

However Clark comes to the conclusion that Phantom is a Booster Gold/Impulse situation. He’s a hero from the future stuck in the past for one reason or another.

Danny beats the ghost, Clark thanks him for his help. Then Danny leaves, however Clark got curious. After all he’s an investigative journalist, he’s curious who Danny was. Then he finds a photo from a place called Amity Park, one featuring Danny Fenton and makes the connection.

So when Danny calls for help Clark has to ignore it, he knows that if he messes with time he may create a paradox and stop Phantom from ever appearing.

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Danielle Fenton, lounging on her Boyfriend Damian’s lap: “You know, if I had a nickel for every time a random billionaire with a questionable hairstyle got a hard on for the local black-haired blue-eyed super powerful hero that is one of the only members of their species and cloned them against their will with the intent of replacing and/or attacking the hero, only for the clone to turn out a little smaller, and weaker, and like, at least 30% cooler, and then the clone gained free will and escaped, and then that clone ended up dating a robin, then i’d have two nickels.”

Kon, lounging on HIS boyfriend Tim’s lap: “Which isn’t a lot.”

The clones, grinning madly and speaking in unison: “But at least we could share!”

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Dead on main takes care of...

De-aged Batfam! (minus Damian)

Danny: Jay please!

Jason on the phone: No babe, I am coming over there and we are getting them back to normal.

Danny: Come on, Damian is enjoying himself.

Damian trying to stop baby Tim from making an explosive: TODD HELP, THEY ARE TURNING THE HOUSE INTO A FORTRESS! *Muffled screams of terror*

Jason: What's happening over there.

Danny: Aww Damian is playing with them.

Damian unseen: Ms.Brown you can not - *Crashing sound* - HOW DID YOU LIFT THE FRIDGE? NO RICHARD DON'T CLIMB ON THE CEILING! WHEN DID CASSANDRA GET A FLAMETHROWER??? WHERE IS DU-

Duke to Damian:

Jason:

Danny:

Jason: I'll call you back.

Joker goons he was threatening: ......

Goon 1: Uh we are just going to... pretend like we didn't hear that.

Goon 2: Yeah, man. We didn't hear anything but, I know how children are like.

Goons 1&4: What?

Goon 3: Yeah dude, James got kids back at home.

Goons 1 & 4: WHY THE HELL YOU OUT HERE!?!? AND NOT THERE?!?

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Love the 'Danny goes to live X place bc of needing ambient ecto to be a healthy boi', but I'm also a sucker for smart engineering Danny.

So, give this man an ecto-inhaler! Give him an ecto-patch like a nicotine patch! Give him an ecto-pump like an insulin pump for difficult battles!

His parents make weird things out of everyday objects, let Danny reforge medical accommodations to be ecto-support!

What I'm tryna say is, be free, Danny!

And not be stuck with getting shots cuz needles are bleh.

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DP x DC Prompt: Haven

Danny is alone.

Everyone he loves is gone—Amity is in ruins, and he has no one left to turn to. So he calls the number he and his twin Damian agreed on when they were ten. Just in case. A last resort.

Damian doesn't ask questions. He remembers the arguments they used to have when Damian would demand Danny join him in Gotham and Danny refusing because he wants nothing to do with the Bat. Damian gives an address, and promises that Danny will be safe with him. That Damian trusts this person more than anyone else. More than Mother. More than Father.

Now Danny stands outside a cheap Gotham apartment, eyes fixed on the number 203. He's exhausted, haunted, half-broken. He knocks.

Dick Grayson opens the door in sweatpants, blinking at a stranger with Damian’s face. There’s a pause. A silent moment of measuring.

"...Damian?" Dick asks.

Danny lowers his hood. "He told me you were safe. I needed somewhere to go."

Dick lets him in.

Inside is warmth. Laughter in the photographs and art on the walls. Danny recognizes Damian's penmanship. A safehouse in every sense of the word.

Danny sits on the very edge of the couch, like it might vanish if he puts his weight on it. While Danny does this, Dick is reaching for his phone.

Dick calls Damian. The reply is soft, but firm: "Please take care of my brother, Baba. I will be by soon."

Danny flinches at the word brother. But something loosens in his chest.

Damian arrives in record breaking time. He and Danny hug, careful of whatever wounds Danny is hiding.

Danny makes a quip on par with Jason Todd's dark humor. Damian rolls his eyes with his entire body, but does not retreat from Danny's arms.

Danny's answering laugh is ragged but real.

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Smallvillers are Victorian children in that they'd explode if you showed them a spice rack and Gothamites are Victorian children in that they snort six lines before their 16-hour shift at the crime factory

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I had THE most impeccable dream last night.

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how many tons of cement would we need to fill in Silicon Valley, hypothetically speaking