snaillamp

[snaillamp]

Villains and Vampires part 46

Warnings: sappy romantic scene, low self/esteem & self-worth, self-hatred, mental/emotional meltdown, comfort whump

Hero was pretty sure that was intentional -- an effort made by Villain to hide what he was feeling inside. Because the eyes were a window into a person's soul: everything could be seen in them, emotions laid bare.

"Hey... look at me," Hero coaxed. Villain's shoulders lifted and fell in a noncommittal shrug -- he didn't lift his head.

So Hero reached out with a gentle hand to tilt his chin up to see his face -- but did it slowly, giving Villain an easy way out if he really didn't want to let her in on this rare bit of vulnerability he was experiencing

But Villain didn't pull away from the kind touch -- he let it happen.

Hero's heart twinged when she saw the tear tracks running down his scarred face and his red puffy eyes.

"Why are you sad?" She asked carefully. "We won the fight. Mocha is alive and safe. It's over now. What reason is there to be sad?"

Villain glanced away from Hero's face to stare elsewhere, his voice coming out raw and hoarse. "Did you... Did you really mean what you said, at the end of the fight? That you... love me?"

He added extra emphasis to the 'me' part of his last sentence, as if it was outrageous to even consider such a thought as Hero loving him.

"I meant every last word," Hero affirmed.

Villain shuddered, his eyes fluttering closed. “It’s just… no one’s ever said that to me before. I don’t know what comes next. I want to be a good partner if we’re really going to give this a try, but… I’m not a good person. I’ve taken lives, committed the most violent of crimes. What if I hurt you because I lost control like I did in the fight?”

“You won’t,” she assured, “because I’ll be right there to pull you back from the edge again like I did before. I can be your tether to sanity, if you’ll allow it.”

Villain gave her a wobbly, uncertain smile.

“I’d like that,” he rasped. “Thank you. For… For all of this.”

Hero bit her lip and nodded, reaching her arms out to pull him into a reassuring embrace -- but her hands paused an inch away from him, giving him the choice to retreat if he didn't want it.

Villain recoiled a hair, but stopped, and stared at Hero for several long beats with a blank face.

Hero stared back. An awkward silence stretched between them that lasted for way too long.

She was about to lower her arms and back off when Villain finally moved, shifting close enough to lean into her with a small shiver.

Trusting, for the first time. Risking coming out of his shell. Choosing to let Hero comfort him instead of pushing her away like he usually would.

Hero couldn't help smiling as he hugged him tight, letting him bury his face in her shoulder. She was distantly aware of the familiar tingly feeling that brushed over her skin in a cold wave, alerting her that Villain had thrown a shadow cloak around them both to disappear. Hiding in plain sight.

It tickled.

⏪️ Back Next ⏩️

Masterlist

@scoundrelwithboba @lumpofsand @isikedmyself878 @iamheretohurt @fleur-a-whump

@ay5ksal @otterfrost @sausages-things @togzy @whump-till-ya-jump

@cravesunconditionallove @whumpwritinglover222

@nevermore-ramblings @mj-or-say10

@morning-star-whump @f1sh-bone @everynameistakencarrots @snaillamp @writing-with-olive

@written-in-the-stars135 @neverthelass

[snaillamp]

Villains and Vampires part 45

Warnings: sappy romantic scene, low self/esteem & self-worth, self-hatred, mental/emotional meltdown

Because he had friends now. Friends to tease, and hang out with, and have fun with. Even earning one friend was more than he’d ever hoped to obtain.

He sat back down on the couch next to Hero, overwhelmed with relief.

Anisa and the healer – Makita, as she'd introduced – struck up a conversation, and Hero listened politely, nodding at regular intervals -- but she noticed Villain staring off into the middle distance, looking lost.

"Hey. Penny for your thoughts?" Hero nudged Villain's leg with her own.

Villain smiled, but it didn't reach his eyes. "I think I just need some fresh air -- it'll do me good after all I've been through today." He awkwardly got up, his posture stiff and closed-off as he stuffed his hands in his pockets and wandered toward the front door to leave.

Hero knew better than to believe his answer completely, so she got up and trailed after the villain to check in on him, leaving Anisa and the healer behind to step outside.

She stopped right outside the door, looking both ways in surprise to find that Villain had totally vanished. Probably using his powers to disappear -- he didn't want to be found.

But after working with him for so long, Hero had gotten good at predicting his moves and noticing the subtle trails his powers left for her to follow.

So she squinted, searching for any sign of--

There. The entrance to the alley next to the healer's house. There were thin tendrils of shadows retreating into it, quickly blending in.

Hero trotted over to investigate, slowing to a casual walk as she entered the dark place.

The alley was still and quiet and empty, and she knew that that was precisely why Villain had chosen it as his safe space to retreat to. Plenty of shadows to hide in, and away from prying eyes. Hero knew him all too well.

She let her eyes adjust and scanned the alley for any sign of life, past the dumpsters until her eyes finally landed on a faded, shadowy figure sitting leaned up against a brick wall with knees pulled to their chest and head buried between them, curled in on themself.

Villain. He was shrouded in shadows that floated lazily around him, dulling his silhouette -- and if Hero hadn't known what to look for to find him, she would have missed his presence entirely. He was barely visible, his powers doing well at hiding him.

But Villain didn't look as okay as he'd tried to sound when he told Hero he wanted some fresh air. Far from it.

Hero walked over to him and crouched down next to his near-invisible outline, fumbling around blindly and then resting a warm hand on what she assumed was his knee.

Villain flinched, his head jerking up in surprise -- he hadn't noticed her approach.

Hero stared into the twin dark pits of endless black smoke that made up his eyes in this form, his face shrouded in ever-shifting shadows, making it hard for her to focus her gaze on him.

"You doing all right?" She asked softly.

"...No, I'm not," Villain's voice whispered from the darkness. A surprisingly honest answer. Hero had expected him to brush her off and insist he was fine.

"Is there anything I can do to help?"

"...Please leave me alone." Villain's voice cracked, and it sounded like he'd been crying.

Hero gave his knee a reassuring squeeze.

"You can't chase me away that easily," she teased gently. "I told you I was here to stay, that I wouldn't run away from you -- and I keep my promises. Is it... okay if I see you? It's kind of strange talking to nothingness."

They both knew what she was asking.

Hero felt rather than saw the ripple of Villain's hesitation, before he gave in to her request.

The shadows slowly bled from his figure, the cloak of darkness shifting away to reveal Villain's unhidden form.

His head was bowed against his chest, black hair falling over his face and hiding his eyes.

Hero was pretty sure that was intentional -- an effort made by Villain to hide what he was feeling inside. Because the eyes were a window into a person's soul: everything could be seen in them, emotions laid bare.

⏪️ Back Next ⏩️

Masterlist

@scoundrelwithboba @lumpofsand @isikedmyself878 @iamheretohurt @fleur-a-whump

@ay5ksal @otterfrost @sausages-things @togzy @whump-till-ya-jump

@cravesunconditionallove @whumpwritinglover222

@nevermore-ramblings @mj-or-say10

@morning-star-whump @f1sh-bone @everynameistakencarrots @snaillamp @writing-with-olive

@written-in-the-stars135 @neverthelass

[snaillamp]

watch until the end to see the guy's eyes lol, but this video just. making me hunger for sedating leon for the 10000th time

of leon fighting it and having a "tolerance" for the dose he's given.

held down, tied down, and drowsily fighting until the end...

peaceful lookin when he's sleeping <3

and maybe... he gets that much needed rest. 'cause the baddies end up pumping him with a little too much sleepy juice. otherwise he would've been swinging much sooner lol

[snaillamp]

volunteered (not free labor, helping out low staff) to come in today and holy fuckin shit, feels like ive been here a week already... now....

for leon!

insomnia for sure, but of a different kind.

nightmares, night terrors. barely a nap while out on a mission, barely three days since something long enough to terrorize him awake.

its not the worst thing, how his legs ache. uncomfortable, but one of those tolerable pains.

running... the best thing when faced with big uglies and no bullets... that's all he needs and he'll be just fine....

but he's starting to hallucinate. faces in the trees that arent there... shadows... a snapped twig, a whisper in his ear.

he's so fucking paranoid. the aching, the throbbing wounds... its tolerable, for now. but he knows he needs sleep. he knows this will get him killed. but he just cant fucking rest just waiting to get ambushed..

[snaillamp]

relaxing after a hard day's work

[snaillamp]

[snaillamp]

One trend on ao3 that I feel uneasy about is the increased use of “author is trans” “author is disabled” “author is ace” etc tags.

On the one hand I can understand how it can feel like a reassuring sign for readers who are trans/disabled/ace etc that their lives are less likely to be misrepresented in that fic because the writer has lived experience.

But at the same time, when we’re writing fanfiction—about kids who can manipulate the force of the waves, about necromancy, about flying on dragons—I think the suggestion that you need to have lived experience to write sensitively about something is so limiting.

Like if we aren’t exercising the full force of our imaginations and empathy in fanfiction, where exactly are we doing it?

It also makes me sad because sometimes you can tell from the nervousness of the author’s note that the writer felt they had to justify their writing with their lived experience. And I don’t think you should feel ethically obligated to gesture toward personal and often painful aspects of your identity to justify writing you do in your spare time that makes you happy.

Some of the best fics I’ve read about disability have been written by authors that didn’t have experience with that exact condition and did heartfelt research and really let themselves inhabit it. And I think that’s a bravura display of empathy and the very best that fiction can offer: caring about a character enough, and caring about your readers enough, that you want to understand what it’s like.

Sometimes friends have asked me about my visual disability to better understand Zuko for their stories, and I’ve always found it really moving. It means they care so much about the fictional world that they want to get the real world right too. It means they’re learning and growing so they can make stories about disability.

It means they love the show, and it means they love me.

[snaillamp]

been building a collection of posts from like minded individuals

[snaillamp]

When the major injuries have been dealt with and treated to the best of their abilities and the companions can now tend to the less consequential aspects of an injured character's comfort- washing away dried blood from their face; removing any remaining uncomfortably damp or grimy clothing that wasn't necessary to access their injuries; seeing to any minor scrapes or bruises; rubbing balm into cracked dry lips or hands; getting them properly situated against pillows or otherwise comfortably positioned; getting them a drink of water; neatening their hair and getting it out of their face; etc.

[snaillamp]

don’t ever talk to me or my 4500000000 niche AUs ever again

[snaillamp]

Throwback thursday to when I was like 12 and I was putting out new writing DAILY...... Like entire Chapters of my then-current wips just, over an afternoon. What the fuck was I on

[snaillamp]

"You're losing blood" no I know exactly where it is. The floor. Don't ever underestimate me.

[snaillamp]

A character, ill or injured, sleeping in a manner not usual for them as further illustration of their ailment's impact- a character who usually sleeps soundly and curled closely into themselves instead splayed out in a restless, feverish doze; a character usually quite active and liable to wake at the slightest noise instead huddled into a shivering fetal position and so deeply asleep it's difficult to rouse them; a character who usually sleeps under only a single light blanket smothered under a pile of quilts and comforters, or vice versa; a character with one habitual sleeping position instead lying on their opposite side or on their back or with one limb akimbo; a character who is usually very particular about their sleeping environment falling asleep without any of their usually necessary accoutrements or rituals or, conversely, a character who is usually able to fall asleep at the drop of a hat requiring much assistance and coaxing; a character having dreams or nightmares unusual for them, or sleepwalking or talking; a character sleeping with an unusual configuration of pillows or propped up in a particular position- any manifestation of a character's injuries or illness that extend even into their sleeping hours.

[snaillamp]

"get up rookie"

[snaillamp]

ever since i was a little girl i knew when i grew up i wanted to stumble down a hospital corridor leaning on my IV stand, bandages leaking blood as I deliriously tried to escape, not understanding where i was

[snaillamp]

I love when magic/poison injuries cause markings through the skin. Darkening tendrils creeping up the whumpee’s body by day. Raised bumps and spots that burn and glow like fire. Indents from the outer layers of skin being destroyed faster than it can be replaced.

A living clock to show the whumpee is running out of time.

[snaillamp]

if it's good enough for you, then it deserves to be made. don't let anyone else decide if your story is worth it or not.