sleepingbeauty6400

[sleepingbeauty6400]

randomly remembers how my family used to have the monthly panti routine utk ngasih makanan dan hal hal lain during covid.

for a family yg strictly not meeting anyone, setiap nganter sumbangan family ini selalu full team.

my fav item to give back then: kodomo anak krn mreka slalu kegirangan tiap dikasih🫶🏻

how i miss doing all the family’s routine.

now we don’t go to the panti physically to give it, bcs it just too awkward to go there without you @ bapak.

miss you and everything that only you do, miss you and everything that only you say, only you think, and only you laugh

deepest respect to my greatest man ever

nobody’s heart is kinder than yours

miss you so bad bapak, is there any man that is living that could be compared to you?

[sleepingbeauty6400]

:’(

[sleepingbeauty6400]

remember that this odd feeling will fade away. you shouldn’t be put too much effort for something that is too simple, too often being told.

it is fine

[sleepingbeauty6400]

tenang buatmu semesta

tuan dan pikiran

tenang ajakmu buktikan

semua dugaan

tenang bersihkan godaan

lidah tak bertulang

tenang jembatan manusia

menuju nurani

[sleepingbeauty6400]

over and over.

we found ourselves in silence

[sleepingbeauty6400]

keep telling yourself that you deserve better.

you did everything the best version it could ever be, but still wasn’t enough.

one day someone that shares the same value as you, that would go extra miles for you no matter what, no matter how much times you’ve spent together and still treat you like it’s their day 1, will come.

you’re fine & you did your best.

it’s not your fault; so you’re okay.

tell yourself you’re okay. it’ll be just fine.

you have everyone, you have you, and you have your God, The one that holds your future just fine.

you did everything you can, you prayed, and nothing changed, probably this was also God’s message to you too, that you deserve better.

deserve the consistency of love, the purity, sincerety of it.

this came also from your prayer, and probably it was also best for you to let go.

you’re fine. and everyone around you will support you no matter what. they’re around each time you reach them out. do not be afraid.

tell yourself that.

[sleepingbeauty6400]

males ke dokterrrr Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa malas malass malasssssssssss tak suka

[sleepingbeauty6400]

deadline RAKB update as per Desember, KKUB posisi Desember, Juknis KKUB, SR, persiapan ke KL. my head is exploding. exhausteddddd

[sleepingbeauty6400]

memang tidak mudah

mencintai

diri ini

[sleepingbeauty6400]

111224

yelled at someone at work today. felt the worst feeling ever. but how am i supposed to be chill when it was their fault at the first place??? and how am i supposed to be asked cruelly on something that is not mine to do at the first place???

letting this out here bcs i just cant hold it inside anymore. i think they know i’m mad, as i obviously went home straight after the discussion with grabcar that costs me almost 100k to home but THIS ONE’s needed to keep me sane.

heavy chest go away!!!😔😔😔😔😔😔😔

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA i want to scream

[sleepingbeauty6400]

when life gives you honey and stars but then trash Gus Miftah video underestimating ice tea seller passes by and you’re just left amazed and cry over how people can be damn too cruel to other people👎🏻👎🏻👎🏻

[sleepingbeauty6400]

since nobody’s even here.

i just want all things about you are captured well, not only just in my memory.

sometimes i look you up on internet just to make sure that somehow you’re still living somewhere…

bapak, gaby rindu kali lah :’(💔

masih rindu, masih sedih setiap ingat bapak udah nggak disini

mau peluk bapak :’(

bertahun2 ga hilang2 rasa sedih dan rindu buat bapak

sepinya hidup gaby tanpa senyum bapakku sayang ❤️ tanpa peluk bapakku sayang❤️ tanpa telfon bapakku sayang❤️

susah ternyata buat bisa cerita ke org lain tentang perasaan gaby ke bapak. udah 3 tahun dan bahkan cerita ke org DATE juga gaby belum mampu.

bapak, gaby rindu❤️❤️❤️

[sleepingbeauty6400]

gila mungkin ini udh basi ya

tp i’m still amazed sometimes, how life got me so far. ternyata terbukti bahwa emg kl mengandalkan Tuhan ga sia2. ga 1-2 org anak Columbia yg scr obvious tidak ingin menjawab pertanyaan2 waktu preparation, but somehow i managed to stay strong (back then - i also dont know how) - paralel debrief TCB, persiapan TCE, RAKB OJK - that was my worst sleeping schedule.

All that with literally no help from other except Primanta. literally cuma Primanta doang yg bener2 genuinely helpful. lalu Tuhan beneran kasih kelulusan. less than 30 people get in from accross the world lho. God do i really deserve this?

I really don’t know how to thank You. I hope my friends can also get in there so we can share happiness together. but still God, you give me assurance when I wasn’t even brave enough to wish it. I was ready to fail. I thought it was too high too. It’s Columbia. i’m an ivy league student!!!😭😭😭

I was so bold telling my friends 3 months ago, I will show the world, that even without their (the columbians who won’t) help, I can still do it as long as I have You.

what balls pushed me back then? even to tell my head is in ache I sometimes still refuse to speak.

(nangis bersyukur tiap hari krn Tuhan baik)

being one of the top 3 tcb, getting columbia, lpdp 1 shot, I still don’t know how to thank You.

I know You know what’s really inside my heart to all these blessings.

thank God

[sleepingbeauty6400]

just like this rain, all things are crafted beautifully as how it supposed to be 🌧️

[sleepingbeauty6400]

Yesterday’s sunday service told me to write whenever our mind feels tangled.

I don’t know where to start, but I am both excited and scared to have such big responsibilities in my workplace rn.

All sustainable finance portfolios now are on me. No number gets out of the bank unless they are being calculated by me.

What if it was wrong? how big will the consequences be? I know it is not there for purchase or disbursement, but the numbers are there as a baseline for strategy creation.

Ooh God i’m so scared everytime this is pops out but both satisfied when we passed the audit.

I surrender all to You God

[sleepingbeauty6400]

Out of all things i learn in CIMBN, of all people i work with in CIMBN, nothing beats the combination of workloads and people in FI.

I know they did give me hardships there, working my ass off so hard, but the knowledge I gain and the friendship I built with all elderly people has made it worth it.

I pray they all will always be healthy & all things went well in work and in life.

and to me, i’m proud of you too.

[sleepingbeauty6400]

haleluya, haleluya, oh kudus kuduslah Tuhan

haleluya, haleluya, terpujilah nama Tuhan😭💔❤️🙌🏻😭😭😭😭

😭😭😭 thank you dear Lord 😭😭😭