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ON MAIN BLOG NOW

@alphaweeb

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@im-always-a-slut-for-kakyoin

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NEW (Not really) BLOG

Find me @im-always-a-slut-for-kakyoin

I’m on there more often than not, Im lazy when it comes to logging out and back in... 

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me:

you:

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i saw kakashi in accounting class

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Ok, so the kids at my school keep changing the backgrounds in the computer lab:

So I put this as one of the backgrounds

Yesterday, I found that someone changed my background to something soccer related, so just to mess around with them, I put this

Today, I looked at all the computers around me, plus my computer and

You children…………..

You are playing a dangerous game.

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this is it. this will be my jaeger.

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God bless white people. Home girl just starts fucking chomping here teeth. Like what?

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Without any time traveling shenanigan, Elise can become a grandmother… for real…

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I’m a degenerate person. Please kill me now.

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The Customer Is Not Always Right: Needs To Press Paws

(I am cashier at a pet store. I see a man walk into the store, pick up a large and expensive coffee table book on show dogs, and get in my line. My manager has warned me, and shown me a picture of this man. He tries to convince cashiers to give him a refund for items he has just stolen. I immediately page my manager, who, unbeknownst to me, is tied up with a minor medical emergency in the back of the store.)

Thief: “I want to return this item.”

Me: “Do you have a receipt?”

Thief: “No.”

Me: “I’m very sorry, sir. Without a receipt, I cannot give you a refund.”

Thief: “Give me a refund.”

Me: “Sir, I watched you pick that book up when you came in. I know you did not buy it.”

Thief: “Give me the f****** money, or I’ll kick your a**.”

(Most of the customers in my line start backing away.)

Me: “Sir, I cannot give you any money, and if you leave with that item I will call the police. Please leave the store.”

Thief: “You little a**-hole!”

(The thief grabs the front of my shirt, and rears his arm back to punch me. I throw my arms up to shield my face. Out of the corner of my eye, I see a flash of movement. The next thing I see is a spatter of blood on my counter, and the man out cold on the floor with a bloody nose. My manager, with a paramedic from the earlier emergency, walks up.)

Manager: “What the heck just happened?”

(As I tell my story, an assistant manager calls the police, opens another line, and checks out the waiting customers. The paramedic starts checking on the man, who has a clearly broken nose. The man slowly regains consciousness, and points to me.)

Thief: “She assaulted me! I’m going to sue!”

(I talk to the police.)

Me: “He grabbed me, but I never hit him. I don’t know how he got hurt!”

(The man, a known criminal, is handcuffed and put in the police car. The officers and my manager go to review the security cameras. About ten minutes later, I get called to come back to the office.)

Manager: “You have got to watch this!”

(The camera footage clearly shows the man getting the book, getting in line, arguing with me, and then grabbing my shirt. At that moment, the customer in line after him, a tiny, middle-aged Asian woman, leaps up, grabs the hair on the back of his head, slams his face into my counter, and then calmly steps back to where she had been standing. She did it so quickly, that we have to run the footage back on slow to see exactly what she had done. After the thief is out cold, she walks over to the new line that the assistant manager opened, buys her bag of cat food with cash, and leaves without a word. Apparently, the other customers either didn’t see what she did, or decided to keep their mouths shut. We have no idea who she is, and we never see her again. The thief was charged with assault on me, and arrested. Wherever you are lady, thanks! You’re my personal super hero!)

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telling ur huntys a story like

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why are people in anime openings always running what are they running from?

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Americans: everyday in school we have to get up, stand straight, put our hands over our hearts and chant allegiance to the flag. Oh, and if you don't do so, you can get in serious trouble.

Everyone who isn't American: okay..sounds fake and mildly horrifying but...okay