skyguyslittleproblem

[skyguyslittleproblem]

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Star Wars - All Media Types Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: Major Character Death Relationships: CC-2224 | Cody/Obi-Wan Kenobi Characters: Obi-Wan Kenobi, CC-2224 | Cody Additional Tags: CC-2224 | Cody and Obi-Wan Kenobi on Tatooine, Established CC-2224 | Cody/Obi-Wan Kenobi, Hurt No Comfort, maybe a little comfort, Medical Inaccuracies, probably, How Do I Tag, No Beta, Grief/Mourning, Post-Star Wars: Revenge of the Sith, Post-Order 66 (Star Wars) Summary:

Obi-Wan and Cody reunite on Tatooine. However, life has never been too kind to them and it won't start now.

Today (actually it was like 6 days ago, i just forgot about it) I bring you a new fic. I could convince you to read this, however, I believe my friend’s reaction after he finished this fic are, in my opinion, a better way to market this:

[skyguyslittleproblem]

caitvi x wolfwren part 1😋

[skyguyslittleproblem]

I’m so tired of living in the- “find out” -era when I didn’t fuck around in the first place

[skyguyslittleproblem]

I miss Booby-Wan Kenoboob. 😞 I just wanna stick my face in dem titties.

-Commander Cody probably

[skyguyslittleproblem]

no but really, like 

i know that some folks love telling creative people that “you should be doing it for fun because you love it not for the compliments” but creative people thrive on feedback whether it’s critical or just complimentary

so when i write fanfiction and don’t get any actual feedback i feel like i spent all that time and energy doing it for nothing because i’m not getting feedback from the people i wrote it for 

doing something you’re proud of and then presenting it to the sound of utter silence is like the worst feeling on earth 

[skyguyslittleproblem]

im always suuuuper chill when i see that service unavailable page

[skyguyslittleproblem]

venting under the line, trigger warning for eating disorder, self-harm, sexual assault and suicide attempts.

I don't talk about being fifteen often. Maybe I should, to let it all out and all that jazz, but it's hard. It's hard remembering everything that had happened, trying to piece together all the memories I purposefully blocked out and figure out who exactly was at fault, so I think I need to start at the beginning.

My biggest nightmare, the person that will never stop haunting me, someone I considered my best friend and the love of my life, who I will refer to as V. We met at summer camp, I was 12, he was 14. We both hated each other's guts, he was one of the weirdest dudes I have ever met and I also thought he was pretty ugly. I skipped summer camp the next year, as did he. But the year after that, when I was 14 and he was 16 and when I saw him again, after two years, I developed the biggest crush ever. He grew his hair out and got really tall, he was dorky and quite awfully dreamy in my eyes. He didn't speak much to me, but I treassured every word that was addressed to me. He had this deep voice now, unlike the screachy sound he made two years prior. And the guitar, the way he held it like it was the most precious thing in the world, the way his fingers could produce the most beautiful sound. This is going to sound really silly, but he played Kara's theme, the one from Detroit: Become Human, my favourite game since the first moment I saw it, and I was sold. Everything about him was dreamy in my eyes. He didn't really care about me though. The camp ended, but my hopes weren't crushed yet.

I turned 15 in September and he 17. Our birthdays are four days apart. My best friend from camp, the girl he was actually into, had a boyfriend at the time. So she, we'll call her T, helped me out and steered him in my direction. We talked, but he still wasn't interested, he was only talking to me to make T happy. But as time went on, we got closer. He helped me pick out a guitar in October and taught me the basics. In November, we hung out properly for the first time. And it was nice, I think that was the moment he started thinking I'm not all that bad sometimes. I've had insomnia ever since I could remember and the only thing that would help me, was someone reading stories to me, so he called me every night and read until I fell asleep. I was so happy. In December, he came out to me as bi, me being the only queer person he knew. I told him I knew for at least two months.

31st of December 2020 will forever be engraved in my memory. V stopped replying to my messages and a few days earlier, he told me his mental health wasn't great. He was first diagnosed with depression when he was around 12. Mine wasn't great either, but at least we could lean on each other. I was scared, we were both hurting ourselves at that point, and what if he went too deep? What if something happened? I called him and he picked up. He was sobbing and I couldn't understand him a word, but he was alive. Later he told me I had saved him back then. That he wanted to kill himself that day and if I hadn't called, he probably would.

I had a lot of problems, I still do. My eating disorder, which I had since I was 11 (thanks mum), was beating my ass, I was cutting myself every other day and I thought about dying way too much. He made me go to the school counsellor. It was the 6th of January, I was listening to OK Computer by Radiohead, Electioneering was playing when I stepped off the bus and snow was everywhere. I'm pretty sure I still have the photo I took at that moment. The meeting was shit. I talked about how my parents put me down, how they make comments about my body, always yell about my bad marks, but never mention the good ones, how they laugh at me. That it's been like that for ages. The counsellor told me that I should go for a walk sometimes or read a book, because she called my class teacher and he said my marks were good, so obviously my issues weren't that bad. I convinced her to help me and so she told me, she could probably get me a therapist. I asked if she could perhaps not call my parents and she said she wouldn't. She did, they were at the school for at least two hours and then they came home and yelled at me for hours.

The therapist was an idiot. Told me I should do yoga and sit up straight. When I told him I had issues with food, because of my parents, he told me I should cook for them. I never went back.

We got together on 15th of January 2021. He told me he loved me that day, on a bench in a park. I wasn't sure if I loved him too just yet. I was never in love before, how was I supposed to know? But I said it back anyway. I didn't want him to leave me. He kissed me and I liked it. Few days later, when we hung out inside for the first time, we made out. He started touching me and when I said I didn't want to do that just yet, he said he respected that. After that, he touched me again. I let it happen that time, I didn't know how to say no.

I didn't learn how to say no for a long time. When I did, he told me he needed sex and I let him happen again. Every time I said no, he convinced me. Sometimes I cried. I didn't know why, I didn't realise I didn't want it, because I did for him. The crying only stopped him sometimes, sometimes he would just ignore it and do his thing. He wasn't the first person, who touched me like that without my consent, but I didn't realize that it wasn't okay, not until I was seventeen.

He had to go to a mental hospital in spring. He called me every day, crying that he didn't want to be there. I just cried because I had no idea what to do. I wasn't eating, I wasn't sleeping, I wasn't paying attention in school, I wanted him to go home. With every call I begged him to go home, he was hurting himself even in the hospital and sending me photos and I was so lost. I didn't know how to deal with everything, I was fucking fifteen. He was the older one, yet I was the one, who felt like his mother. He returned after two weeks, it just made things worse. It was the worst two weeks of my life.

I grew attached after that, I didn't want to be without him. I'd make a scene every time he went away for longer than a night and couldn't call me. He went on a trip for a few days, he couldn't have his phone on him. I threw a tantrum. I threatened him, said I would hurt myself if he went. He said he'd call my parents and tell them. I just cried after that and he went on the trip. I made the trip terrible for him. This happened many times, sometimes he'd leave the place he was to come to me and comfort me, sometimes he didn't and I got so angry I ingored him, leaving him in worry. He never knew if I did something to myself, if I was even alive.

He threw tantrums too. We lived around thirty minutes from each other if I took the bus, an hour if I went by train. Sometimes he'd text me, saying he was feeling like shit, asking if I could come over. Sometimes I was in the middle of something, once it was baking. He blocked me or just didn't reply, I can't remember, but there were cookies in the oven and I had to wait for them to finish baking before I could catch the bus. I remember running to his house, sick with worry that he had tried to kill himself again. He didn't that day, but this situation happened once a week.

We were slowly breaking each other. For a year and a half, this is all we did. The same scenarios over and over again. I had a temper and he did a lot of stupid childish things. It was always the same; he would fuck something up and I would yell at him for being stupid.

I started planning to break up with him in the summer of 2022. A mutual friend warned me, said his dad was like V - his parents divorced earlier that year - told me to get out while I still could. I started opening up my eyes that day.

I planned the break up for weeks. His parents were gone for a week, so I moved in for the week. When he was sleeping, I hid everything sharp and all the alcohol in his room. I let his closest friends know, which day I'd do it, so that they could come over and be with him.

I let him know, gently, that I wanted to break up. He cried for hours and I held him. When he stopped crying, his friends came and I left for the evening. Somehow his mother found out and yelled at me for two whole minutes, how dare I do that to her. She was yelling at a sixteen-year-old. I hung up and cried, before eventually returning to his house. I think he was drunk, I stayed for the rest of the week, until his parents returned. We were broken up, but still together at least once a week for another half a year. I cut him off after that.

Many things happened, that I can't remember clearly enough to write about. I know I tried to kill myself a few times by getting drunk, eating pills and falling asleep on my back. I don't remember how many times or when I did that.

I know he was possessive after we broke up, texting me where I was and who was I with all the time. I know other things happened, bbut I can't remember what exactly.

I don't remember so many things, it haunts me sometimes.

I don't know if I was a bad person or if I was just a kid and I don't think I ever will.

[skyguyslittleproblem]

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types Rating: General Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: CC-2224 | Cody/Obi-Wan Kenobi, Padmé Amidala/Anakin Skywalker Characters: CC-2224 | Cody, Obi-Wan Kenobi, Anakin Skywalker, Padmé Amidala Additional Tags: Codywan First Kiss Bingo 2025, Codywan First Kiss Bingo, Alternate Universe - Victorian, Mentioned Alpha-17 (Star Wars), Mentioned Ahsoka Tano, Mentioned Sheev Palpatine | Darth Sidious, Love Letters, Letters, POV CC-2224 | Cody, CC-2224 | Cody-centric, Former Soldier CC-2224 | Cody, Well invalided home former soldier Cody, Operas, secret kiss, Pre-Relationship, Until the very end, Happy Ending, Obi-Wan Kenobi & Anakin Skywalker are Siblings, Injured CC-2224 | Cody, I should say relatively mildly injured Series: Part 1 of Codywan First Kiss Bingo 2025 Summary:

Cody is invalided home from a war after taking shrapnel to his face and finds an unlikely companion who turns into something more whilst seeking help.

My fill for secret kiss for @codywanfirstkissbingo​!

Bingo card is below the cut!

Keep reading

[skyguyslittleproblem]

oh my god, this is amazing!! i love it so much! <3

For @codywanfirstkissbingo Free space! Just wanted to draw bandmates!codywan

Obi-Wan's design is inspired by this drawing by @skyguyslittleproblem which has been slowly rotating in my mind since I saw it

Bingo card and alternative coloring with fluorescent lipstick under the cut

[skyguyslittleproblem]

i had a 4 hour drive today so i put on the revenge of the sith audiobook and the part where palpatine tells anakin to kill dooku came on right around the time that i saw a cybertruck and for a brief and beautiful moment when he said "do it" i had the urge to ram my honda full on into that shitty ass car

[skyguyslittleproblem]

wip wednesday

my tablet is still broken and will be for some time, but i wanted to post something, so here you go.

paintings i haven’t gotten around to finishing in months and probably never will

[skyguyslittleproblem]

[skyguyslittleproblem]

For the @codywancomfort event, I finished my modern AU fic ‘Call and Response’ [6123 words], and threw a quick kiss in there too. Inspired by @jinn-exe‘s post which can be found here, as well a comment by @badwolf36 on the same post.

Also, shout out every creator who reads this - this fic took far more time and effort than I expected, and I’m genuinely amazed by how talented each and every one of you are. Hope you enjoy reading :)

Summary:

Cody was pulled out of his thoughts abruptly as someone slammed into his shoulder, causing him to stumble slightly. “Sorry!” he heard a voice gasp as Cody noticed a small, blue object tumbling to the ground. Instinctively, he reached down to grab what he realised was a phone, when he looked up at the stranger and immediately forgot how to breathe.

A young man, maybe slightly older than himself, stood in front of him with the fair skin of his cheeks tinged a lovely shade of pink. Ginger hair fell down to his shoulders in gentle waves, which just skimmed the top of his soft-looking beige sweater. Bright blue eyes met his, and Cody could’ve sworn that the world tilted on its axis.

Or: Five times Cody picked up Obi-Wan’s phone + One time he didn’t

[skyguyslittleproblem]

tcw characters as my english teacher's quotes

(+ a bonus one from a different english teacher, because it was too funny not to add)

[skyguyslittleproblem]

bring back tumblr ask culture let me. bother you with questions and statements

[skyguyslittleproblem]

Glub shitto judging Mr. Puppy Eyes

[skyguyslittleproblem]

some WIPs

my ipad's broken (yay me) so i decided to post some wips based on A Stop Along The Way by the amazing @viceroyfallacy

if you haven't read it yet, go give it a chance, hopefully you'll like it as much as i do!

cody with the little bow is so cute, probably my favourite fan art i made.

a rough idea of *the* tunics from naboo

also a rough idea of obi-wan's tattoos (the braid will change once i get my hands on my ipad again)

and last but not least

cody in a dress but! just the dress and maybe some lipstick (this is what i do with my life instead of studying for my finals, jesus)

the dress is so impractical and so so self-indulgent for me, but it is what it is

i plan on changing so many things, but until the tablet's fixed i can't :,)