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u know what my biggest pet peeve is? when someone is like genuinely very mean to others and when they’re called out on their behavior they’re like “sorry i’m just a bitch xoxo” like yes u sure are!!!!! not something u should be proud of

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god today i ID’d an old dude buyin booze and he pulled out a fake ID with an elvis pic, then laughed and pulled out a matching one but with curly from three stooges on it, and im like okay please and he finally pulled out his real license and his legal name was steve sinner

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yall its been real but if net neutrality gets booted there is no way in HELL i am ever paying to use tumblr

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I saw a Japanese tweet about the size of the shadows for each fish in Animal Crossing Pocket Camp and decided to translate the names of each fish into English! Hope this helps everyone in your fishing adventures~

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The high standards of masculinity that is put upon men is actually enforced by other men, and have nothing to do with women. It is not an example of ways that women “oppress” men

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heres my game theory

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As much as I love Stranger Things, I’m gonna need Eleven and Max to be friends in Season 3 because the ‘female lead sees the only other same-aged female in the group as a rival instead of an ally’ thing was the most cringy part of season 2 and I really don’t need to see anymore of it with these kids. 

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genuinely… is he okay

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there’s nothing funnier than watching two cats stare at each other while one slowly raises their arm to strike for ABSOLUTEY NO REASON

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The signs as three word descriptions based on people I know

Aries: tiptoe through chaos

Taurus: a pimpled goblin

Gemini: horny, but chic

Cancer: the sun’s sugar

Leo: stressed but blessed

Virgo: lovely and oblivious

Libra: pure peachy brilliance

Scorpio: don’t poke that

Sagittarius: don’t smoke that

Capricorn: deeply troubled flannel

Aquarius: that’s a fire-hazard

Pisces: nasty lil grandpa

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What even is smh is it smell my hair

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the first rule of Internet argument is to make sure your profile description isn’t so embarrassing that it can immediately be used against you.