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— F*CK ENGLISH SENTENCE MEME
based on conversations had in the discord server my friends and i made, affectionately referred to as the “fuck english discord server”, and some of our dms outside of it. feel free to change pronouns/diction/etc as necessary. tw; swearing and nsfw themes
“ chocolate spread on toast is and will forever be the superior thing to put on toast . ” “ being bi means loving women and ___ . ” “ what time was the mishapocalypse ? ” “ spoiler: awesome toilet seats inside . ’ “ bottoms up for christ, my boys . ” “ SQUARE UP DOLPHIN MOTHERFUCKER . ” “ we know you’re gay, __ . ” “ to err is human. to forgive is… kind of our thing . ” “ AND YOU HEAT IT IN THE MICROWAVE, FUCK IT ON YOUR TOAST, EAT IT, AND SHIT IT OUT . ” “ what is gasbagging ? ” “ i’m tired and cranky don’t touch my fuckin’ pie . ” “ i’m not fueling your mommy kink . ” “ i was standing at the bathroom sink in my underwear like ‘i wonder what it’d be like if i had a dick’ . ” “ remember, i’m the exception to the no flirting rule . ” “ he wants to vore you . ” “ it’s angst hours my guys . ” “ sometimes men are just like that . ” “ the behavior you exhibited was aquarian . ” “ good morning i need a caption for these selfies i’m about to drop . ” “ live fast, eat ass . ” “ guess how many pairs of underwear i’m wearing . ” “ five. it’s a diaper. spank proof . ” “ does anyone wanna trade siblings ? ”
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security called me at work today and told me they saw me outside chasing a frog around on the security cameras. i wasnt in trouble they just wanted to let me know they saw me. i didn’t catch him.
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“I wish it could always be like this.”
“You’re always there for me.”
“The stars are the only thing that makes sense.”
“There’s more out there, you just have to be patient.”
“It doesn’t all have to be existential dread.”
“You’re so much different when we’re alone.”
“I like it when the worlds quiet.”
“There’s a place for us somewhere.”
“They’ll name constellations after you one day.”
“Your hearts beating so fast.”
“They don’t know what they want.”
“You don’t know what you want.”
“That’s what they’re supposed to say.”
“We really don’t know what we’re doing.”
“I miss the old you.”
“Nostalgias a trap.”
“Aliens are out there.”
“Did you hear that?”
“I really want pizza right now, think it’s open?”
“What time is it?”
“But why would they abduct cows?”
“We’ll all be dead soon enough anyways.”
“I wish we didn’t have to sleep.”
“What do you believe in?”
“What happens after we die?”
“Seems like a silly thing to say, don’t you think?”
“And what’s your excuse?”
“You’ll get it together soon.”
“Sometimes I feel like I’ll never have it together.”
“It’d be better if people weren’t so afraid of their feelings.”
“You keep quiet and we both lose.”
“I wish I could save this forever.”
“When did you realize you were in love with me?”
“The rooms spinning.”
“I loved you long before you knew.”
“I’m not afraid of death, I think it’ll be peaceful.”
“The Universe is too big for that.”
“Do you think we’ve met in other lives?”
“I’d come back to haunt you.”
“Would you come back to haunt me?”
“What’s alternate universe you doing right now?”
“Tell me a secret.”
“Why haven’t you told anyone?”
“I wish we knew each other sooner.”
“You’re a game changer.”
“I’m a game changer.”
“Don’t ignore fate.”
“Ignorance isn’t bliss.”
“What, is that a conspiracy theory?”
“It’s probably the Illuminati anyways.”
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starter call !! ( @churchvoid )
❛ ----- what do you think REALLY went down in the production meeting for WORM ON STRING ? ❜ sie’s mumbling, her focused expression really showing the passion behind that strange ass question she asked. vision flickers upward, to the other as she tilts her dial, causing bangs to sway ever so gently to the right. A HAND, it extends, landing on the opposite’s shoulder, ❛ and did they know they were going to be creating such a revolutionary incredible TOY ? ❜
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starter call !! ( @oflunars )
boy problems by carly rae jepsen plays in the background. ( and yes, that is the GREATEST ; song ever made. ) sie’s spread over the moon’s lap, a default simper etched upon tanned features. optics wide shut for a brief period, before they shoot open - it seems an idea sprung upon the KITTEN ! ❛ OKAY, BABY. HEAR ME OUT. what if - we got matching tattoos ... right NOW ?? ❜
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i’m here, i’m gonna do a few more of those starters! c:
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lets get this BREAD?! starter call
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twllight:
‘ ‘is nothin’ . ’ the words are almost SPAT out , a defence mechanism kicking in , his hands TWITCH as mitchell’s head feels like static . “ FUCKING IDIOT !! should have hid it better , you were doing so WELL keeping your little secret . ” it’s what his mind is screaming at him as a hand reaches up to slam its palm against his forehead . repeatedly . ‘ idiot , fucking idiot .. ’ is muttered with each resounding SMACK as the male grows more and more agitated , ‘ it’s nothin’ , sie , jus’ get the fuck out ‘nd leave ‘es alone !! ’
❛ … WHERE AM I MEANT ---- ❜ to go ? sierra didn’t bother finishing her sentence, it really didn’t seem worth it. as she takes in his reaction, the guilt begins to creep over her - she wanted to stop him, grab his hand & tell him he wasn’t an idiot - but she fears that’d make the situation worse. maybe it was wrong of her to even ask what it was ? it’s none of her business, after all. ❛ you don’t have to tell me. i apologise for asking. ❜ spoken in a HUSHED tone as she brushes past him, hastily making her way toward the exit.
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twllight:
his heart drops to his stomach as soon as mitchell turns from locking the door and notices the bag in her hand , it’s panic that sets in then . NO , NO , NO !! no one was supposed to find out , least of all SIERRA , and he can’t stand the look in her eyes that he views as DISGUST , HATRED , it’s not long before he strides of to her and rips the baggie from her hand . hands shake in … anger ?? FEAR , as he turns his back to the elder , ‘ the fuck were you t’inkin’ goin’ through me shit , sie ?? ’
❛ ... ? - i was just looking for batteries ... ❜ & it seems his heart isn’t the only one to sink. the way her question is ignored, the way the bag is ripped from her grasp - it confirms it. ❛ it was just - there, mitch. ❜ she’s hoping the softer tones in her voice are helping to convince she isn’t angry - SHOCKED, maybe a little upset but - not angry. ❛ WHAT is it ? & uh - is it ... yours ? ❜
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bunny lisa 🐰
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‘ can i be excused for the rest of my life? ‘ from abigail
spongebob memeos / accepting !
. ❛ I THINK … i think that’s called dropping out & yes - you could easily do that. ❜
#asphaltkissed#ᵃˢᵏˢ﹕ ( slide into. my not quite dms )#my brain froze on this one#comedy brain death time
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send in 🤝 + a friendship and i’ll tell you who:
texts the other memes at 3 am:
tries to convince the other to do an idea that definitely sounds questionable:
is the designated driver and who always gets wasted:
always has to host the impromptu sleepover:
who’s netflix account gets mooched off of:
brings all the snacks and who supplies the movie:
is usually the first one to say sorry after a fight:
is the ‘ mom friend ‘:
calls the other at 12 am to wish the other a happy birthday without fail:
is the better wingman to the other:
‘ the strong must protect the sweet ‘ , who’s the ‘ strong ‘ and who’s the ‘ sweet ‘:
pulls the other up for karaoke to sing a duet together:
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yestodcys:
‘ okay, this might sound dumb or something, ’ she giggled. ‘ but why do people go to all of this extent for valentine’s day ?? ’ the mermaid asked, looking around at all of the decorations in the various stores. ‘ shouldn’t you love your significant other the same each day ?? you don’t need to act like that for one day only. ’ // @sierrcr
❛ uhhh - it can get excessive. i agree. but i think ... it’s just a chance to go that extra mile i guess ? sure you can do that everyday but ... it’s nice knowing that millions of other people are feeling the same way as you are on that day. that’s how i see it anyways. it’s a big big warm mini holiday !! ❜ optics peer down & narrow upon some of the more ... QUESTIONABLE gifts lay out in front of them. sie giggles, ❛ but there’s a line DEFINITELY ! ❜
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starter call !! ( @asphaltkissed )
optics wander around the room aimlessly, no particular goal in mind, simply just taking in her surroundings. although, sie’s definitely thinking about PANCAKES ... so it’d be nice if one of them popped up somewhere. but at a nightclub ? next to impossible. maybe she should just dip & go get food - this place blows anyways ... what’s this ? ( not a pancake, but - ) someones looking her way, and of course, like it’s the most natural thing in the world, the blonde responds with a series of incredibly weak finger guns.
#asphaltkissed#ʳᵉᵖᶫᶦᵉˢ﹕ ( utter nonsense. probably )#brought to u by me who was thinking about pancakes
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starter call !! ( @punkassdaegu )
let me just go ahead & set the scene real fast. just so - y’know everybody is on the same page in regards to what exactly is being walked in on ; HOTEL ROOM SERVICE BY PITBULL ... FULL BLAST. sierra, in her pjs : she’s in complete twerk mode. a cheeto hanging from her lips, the words ( hotel, motel, holiday inn ) are being muttered softly ... & now that we’re up to date, there’s a creak of the entrance to her room, causing the girl to pause, her eyes going wide.
❛ HEY UHH ! - ❜ aaaaand she’s down, ❛ NOT YOUR ROOM DUDE ! ❜
#ʳᵉᵖᶫᶦᵉˢ﹕ ( utter nonsense. probably )#THIS IS THE WORST THING IVE EVER WROTE#punkassdaegu#imagine walking into a hotel room and seeing that id set it on fire
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starter call !! ( @epiiphcny )
she’s panicking. being the literal HUMAN DISASTER sierra tends to be - the sight of another she finds even slightly attractive will send her into a frenzy. hence the nervous laughter & fiddling of the sacred bangs ... some say they hold a secret THIRD EYE ! ❛ i uh - uhhh - D-DADDY LIKE A PRETTY BABY ? ❜
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starter call !! ( @busanbunnie )
her heartbeat. she can … HEAR it ; for it bangs in her chest with certain aggression. the nervous feeling - pulling her back, threatening to knock her from her feet - but alas, she continues forward. eyes spot her there ; as beautiful as ever. it feels fake ; unreal, other worldly. it’s always odd seeing someone in real life after only being able to view them through a screen for such a long period of time, ❛ HANA ? - ❜
#ʳᵉᵖᶫᶦᵉˢ﹕ ( utter nonsense. probably )#busanbunnie#hakuna matata what a wonderful phrase#hakuna matata aint no passingpahshsee
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