shotdownbylove

[shotdownbylove]

You took the best of my heart and left the rest in pieces ..

[shotdownbylove]

a year older 🌷

[shotdownbylove]

Oh hi! I’m back?

[shotdownbylove]

Paninindigan kita

Sasamahan ka kahit na

Napapalibutan ng mga problema

Sa hirap at ginhawa

Dadamayan kita sinta

[shotdownbylove]

I was just scrolling sa archive stories ko on Instagram and I saw this.

I remember that day I was torn kung sasagutan ko ba to bc it’s not something to be proud of kasi kapal naman mukha ko kung ganon but I’ll just answer here.

Yes, I have cheated on my girlfriend (the one I have now)

That time kasi hindi pa talaga ako totally moved on sa last relationship ko. I admit naman din sakanya na ganon nga na hindi pa talaga ako ready. But she accepted it and waited for me for almost 2years.

Yep. Almost 2 years, sobrang patient niya with me and sa feelings ko. We didn’t made it hard for each other kaya magkasama parin kami even though “we’re on a break” but I used to talk to a lot of girls (and guys) And I know sa part na yon ang tanga ko. To think na may naghihintay sakin and ready ako tanggapin over and over and over again. I took her for granted. Na ruin ko yung trust niya and still trying my bestest to bring it back kahit alam ko sa sarili na impossible naman mangyare yon.

Dami ko nakikita and napapanood sa socmed about sa “umamin” thingy. I’m not proud sa nagawa ko. I’m still responsible for the damage caused. Di ko alam anong reason bakit niya pa gusto magstay sakin despite everything that happened. I’m so blessed and grateful for this one.

EDIT:

August 22,2022 Our 53rd month. We had an unusual conversation. We talked about our past relationships. Which we didn’t knew would ever happened.

But yeah. I realized na sobrang nagbago pala talaga ako. Before I used to beg for love. I can even remember myself being tanga tanga and hinahabol yung ex ko na alam kong di naman na babalik pero now sobrang different. Iba yung impact ng trauma sakin. To the point na hiniling ko na sana di ko na nakilala yung tao na yon para yung taong mahal ko ngayon sakanya ko nabubuhos lahat ng pagmamahal na meron ako noon.

Nakakapansisi na di ako dumaan sa tamang healing process. Nakakapansisi na we had to go through all these para marealize ko na I’m worthy of the love I truly deserve. Alam ko na walang excuses because nagcheat ako and I will never be proud of it. I regret going through that phase. Sobrang hindi deserve ng partner ko.

I’m lucky we get to talk about what had happened in the past. And I’m more than lucky she gave me another chance. Hindi ko na to sasayangin. 🥺💗

[shotdownbylove]

Tagaytay after work because why not? 🥺💜

[shotdownbylove]

Sabi ko sa self ko “NO” pa eh. Iba yung nagawa ng boredom ko nung Monday.🫣😂

The feminine urge to just dye my hair copper because of Laura Prepon & Sadie Sink😩

[shotdownbylove]

Medjo naloloka ako sa mga kaganapan sa office ngayon. Nagshare yung trainer namin na meron isang floor sa bldg. namin na nasunog at vacant na. Since then, wala nang nakakaakyat don at iisang elevator nalang ang nagoopen pag nakakarating sa floor na yon. We were so curious kaya we decided to go and find out for ourselves. We tried the first 2 elevators (9 ang elevator sa bldg) after nung dalawang elevator hindi na kami nagtry. Pero guess what? NAGSTOP YUNG ELEVATOR SA FLOOR NA YON. And walang nag push ng button for that specific floor. Kasi need na namin umaakyat ng 33rd floor at pumunta ng training room. I can’t help but to panic and ganon din mga kawork ko. Pag dating namin sa 33rd floor yung emotions namin nadala namin at nagulat din kami sa mga nasa labas ng elevator na kaofficemate namin. May isang babae na nagreact at nag tanong kung “masaya ba daw kami.” Sa sobrang takot namin at gulat gawa ng mga taong nasa labas ng elevator dali dali kaming pumunta ng training room at nagresearch abt sa bldg. The guard also confirmed na nangyayare daw talaga yon.

I don’t want to remember that it happened. Sobrang bigat sa feeling. Hindi ako makatulog.

[shotdownbylove]

The feminine urge to just dye my hair copper because of Laura Prepon & Sadie Sink😩

[shotdownbylove]

So broke

[shotdownbylove]

I’m hurt but I’m always silent.

[shotdownbylove]

“For new leaves to be able to grow, old leaves must fall.” -moira

[shotdownbylove]

We’re are moving in together. Just the two of us ay hehe syempre kasama mga furbabies namin. There’s a lot of pressure but yah, I think it’s for the best. Thank you, Lord for giving me such an incredible partner. I couldn’t ask for more.🥺💗

[shotdownbylove]

By clairelou_weekendwander

[shotdownbylove]

Sign of aging rin ba yung nakakalimutan mo kung ilang taon kana? HAHAHAHAHA

[shotdownbylove]

Umiyak na naman po ako kagabi nang dahil lang sa movie.

[shotdownbylove]

When it was no longer you, it was me.