shieldofapollo

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Not me laughing at this

Yes, yes to all of this

Broke: The batfam separates Tim and Damian to stop them from fighting each other.

Woke: The batfam separates Tim and Damian because they both encourage the others' absurd logic to justify feral behavior.

...

Tim: "See when I can focus directly on a case with no interruptions, my success rate goes up exponentially." (Hasn't slept in 56 hrs.)

Damian: "Statistics don't lie"

Tim: "Statistics don't lie"

...

Damian: "When I adopt more animals, it makes me happy, and if I'm happy, I work better with a team."

Tim: "And you help an animal that needs a home."

Damian: "EXACTLY!"

Tim: "If anything, its irresponsible to let them roam the streets as strays."

Damian: "That's what I said!"

...

Tim: "So one of the executives of this firm has been stealing some stuff, but unfortunately, he also has the resources and status to get him off the hook with a light sentence. Which sucks."

Damian: "What if you add a more serious crime to up the charges?"

Tim: "...That is GENIUS! I have dozens of cold cases that I've solved, but the culprits have already died! Im sure one of them could easily pass as him! "

Damian: "I can help if you need any evidence planted."

Tim: "Sure thing! I'll let you know when i find the right felony to give him!"

...

Dick: "At least they're having fun and getting along?"

Bruce: "This is not better. Stop trying to pretend this is better."

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I love the idea that Dick and Roy were together at one point, with Jason and Roy now being together, simply for Tim's reaction.

The first words out of his mouth just being "what, you fucking down the family line or something?" Followed by a suspicious squint and asking "do I need to be worried if you guys break up?"

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Nice

Bruce: If a stranger came up to you and said 'I'm your dad's friend, he told me to pick you up' what would you say?

Tiny!Jason: I'd say 'You're lying, my dad doesn't have any friends!'

Bruce:

Dick, in the corner: *tearing up* I'm so proud...

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I sometimes imagine that Dick Grayson kept up with his gymnastics in a public setting so that he just. Goes to the Olympics as himself. Several times. Doesn't mention it to his family so there are just several possible avenues of this coming up like:

Jason, watching the Olympics: that could have been you doing that for your country, dickface

Dick: damn, I already won four gold, what else do you want

Jason:.....w h a t

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Sometimes I feel like Jason just needs his own dog. Like Dogmeat (no joke, that is the name) from Fallout 4 who is indestructible, loves you unconditionally, and can occasionally find you ammo.

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I was looking for this. I also took some library science classes and I was shocked. I thought everyone knew about that. It’s in the bill of right for libraries.

newbie asked if we're supposed to look out for 'red flags' in interlibrary loan requests in reference to a request a patron had made for a book about cannibalism. she was looking expectantly at me like she was expecting me to be equally aghast at this........girl why would you work at a library if you want to play book police

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A true work of art

Endou Yuu versus the cosmic unknown 

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I think she just got adopted

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Wow and I thought my pain tolerance was high

Every goon in Gotham feels bad if they break Nightwing’s nose or knock out one of his teeth. It’s a thing. You fuck up the pretty bird’s face and he’s…fine with it? But it’s not fine. It feels wrong, for some reason. You don’t touch his face.

(Cut to Dick peeling off his domino mask in an alley asking Jason if it’s “broken” and his nose is halfway across one side of his face. Dick seems largely unbothered by this. Jason is seething with rage. Damian is already sprinting down the alley ready to exact revenge on the newbie goon who accidentally went high instead of low on a lucky hit. Dick asks Jason what’s wrong. His nose is so badly broken, there’s blood welling up in his tear ducts. Jason just stares at him, at a loss for words entirely)

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give your friends a big ol' smooch NOW

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kinger and queenie

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"You just have to look closely."

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"How is your wife, Kinger?"

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You squealed as the heroes unmasked and kissed in front of the roaring crowds. Wait…you recognize their faces…that’s YOUR best friend and YOUR girlfriend/boyfriend.

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You are a Villain who has always had The Hero to stop you. At first, it was a true rivalry, soon it became a bit more like cat and mouse, you even found yourself enjoying it. One day, The Hero isn't showing up to stop you.

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Sooo cute

Tim who does crochet.

It’s Dick who is given the first gift, long before Tim is Robin and even before he knows who Robin is.

It was simply because he was a kind kid who had been there to witness something horrible and wanted to comfort the poor boy he saw sobbing off two lost loved ones.

Little Tim walked up to Dick with the crochet elephant that was admittedly a little funky looking and held it up to him without making eye contact. He had hidden the small plushie from his parents lest they disapprove of his hobby, just like they did with drawing and skating.

Dick had beamed happily and held onto the toy, saying it was so cute and how Tim should be so happy to have it.

Tim had frowned and shook his head, “It’s for you, Mister Grayson. It’s Tifa.”

Never had Tim seen someone so in awe of his creation as he did in that moment and it made him beam just like Dick had been.

Once Dick took the little elephant into his hands Tim had bolted away.

Bruce was next, being gifted a big fluffy jumper on his first birthday after loosing Jason. It was a soft, light green with too long sleeves that went over his ass. It was big, far too big, and thick enough that it might even be too hot in autumn.

He didn’t wear it for a while, mainly because he ignored the big wrapped present Tim had left in his room out of guilt and shame and even a little frustration.

When he opened it up he put it on and promptly broke down, finding the feeling more similar to a hug than he thought something non-hug could get.

He wore it in front of Tim once to show he appreciated it and then wore it whenever he was injured.

Steph got a few things, mainly tops and one big blanket that he gave her after they reconnected when she came back. It had been his way of saying he forgave her and wanted to be her friend again without using words.

Cass got a big poncho with a hood that was rainbow, bright and loud while still capable of hiding her when she felt she couldn’t be seen.

It took a long time for him to make Jason anything after he came back. When he did, him and Tim avoided each other for over a year until Tim overheard Alfred talking to Bruce about how sad it was to not see his two bright boys getting along.

Alfred had been pouring tea with the pot he made a kettle warmer snug with Lilly of the Vally on it when he said it.

So, Tim had searched through his old photos of Jason’s Robin and made himself recall those old ideals and awe. He made himself remember what Jason also had ripped from him and, while it wouldn’t change or excuse how Jason had brutalised him, it made him understand him more.

He decided that instead of joining to Jason and having a heart to heart, that he should do what all bats did and start off without saying a thing.

He makes Jason a blanket that took him over a month of a floral book cover of Jane Ire.

Tim was relived when it was done and simply left it laid out on Jason’s bed in his latest hideout with a note that said,

“I know little about Jane Ire, maybe you could tell me about it sometime?

~ Tim. D.”

Jason had sent him a text a day later to say he could send him a copy with his annotations if he wanted.

It wasn’t long after Tim had read the book, taking twice as long with all the notes Jason had left in it, that he was then left to make something for Damian.

Naturally, he didn’t want to at first.

Also naturally, he got bored and wanted to make another animal after seeing Tifa again. She was cute, but a little munted with age.

He took one look at Titus and promptly made a plan to create him with crochet. He wanted to give it to Bruce after he was done, but he’s only an asshole when he finds it entertaining.

At heart, he’s a kind boy, so he gives it to Damian.

When he gets an actual, verbal thank you from the new Robin, he makes Alfred the Cat and Ace, then finally Bat-cow and Goliath.

The best thing he’s made, according to Duke, is Signals first ever fan made merch that he wears nearly all the time.

Kate says that wrong because the leg warmers he made for winter patrols have apparently saved her life.

Salina would say it’s actually the cat pawed mittens he made her when he was twelve and never told Bruce about.

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Yep, My mind just has making my way down to own with that last part. Do you think it’s just his background soundtrack. Because that would be hilarious.

The only acceptable trans Tim headcanon would be Tim introducing himself to the batfam as a boy from the get-go with such confidence that no one questions him. Then, his first solo case as Robin is investigating the disappearance of Jack and Janet Drake's "daughter," so he pretends to have a twin sister by forging a bunch of documents and photoshopping family pictures. He then fabricates evidence of her death, committing multiple crimes in the process, and holds a fake funeral at the end. Because if his previous name is dead to him, he's gonna kill it the Tim Drake way