shesgoingtonyc

[shesgoingtonyc]

Keep going for yourself

Don't let the past years go to waste. Its never too late to start , loosing all your years of hard work is harder than not starting.

stay kind to yourself and get ready to succeed. Remember to push yourself to the best of your abilities because if you don't do it no one will do it for you

[shesgoingtonyc]

i hate the feeling that people want to get to know me but they never actually get to knowing me

[shesgoingtonyc]

i tell you i missed you, you give me a slow spreading smile. we're only children after all

[shesgoingtonyc]

how do i tell people that my arrogance is a facade, like lowkey u cant be more self conscious than me

[shesgoingtonyc]

god i wish life was easier but im such a fucking mess and even journaling where i know no one will read it i feel like hiding. hiding is actually so instinctual to me its crazy, im loud and angry and bitter and sharp w my words but barking dogs seldom bite

[shesgoingtonyc]

I’ve not been well over the holidays so decided to mock up how i’d illustrate PJO instead lol - all in lorem ipsum so I don’t get in trouble with the big mouse!

[shesgoingtonyc]

im always crying on nye. for some reason, i thought id break tradition this hear. but here i am, glassy eyes. i got a C in precalc this semester, somehow i think that broke me. but if that broke me, it was the fixable type, the broken plates that Japanese people fix and turned into art. the kitsungi-able plates. i think right now, whats making me feel like glass crumbs right now is my parents' reaction to it. they dont think i can handle stuff anymore, and im beginning to think that when father called me average he was right. i dont think he realized that id remember it. but now i want to take AP lang next semester and my mother isnt so sure. she didnt even tell me she hadnt approved my english teacher's email regarding the topic. she hasnt given him the green light to let me level up. and you know the worst part? she didnt fucking tell me she hadnt until now. istg it hurts, it hurts not being trusted to handle my own shit anymore because of one fuck up. i hv math tuition now and everything so please for the love of god, take this one chance on me mama. she told me she hadnt approved the request today, about 10 days later or smthng. and we were baking muffins together and it was so perfect except now i want to die. when i left the kitchen, my mother and sister were talking abt how much of the batter was gonna be muffins and how much cake. and i left the filled muffin tray in the oven, without starting the oven bc they were still debating what to do w the rest of the batter. my mom called me back, shes like abeeha u havent started the oven itll cook right? i told her that when i left they still didnt know what to do w the batter. she said theyd decided tht theyd leave it for cake but after they see how the first batch turns out in case they need to make adjustments to the recipe. she asked me where my mind was these days. that wasnt when i left. i left way before that but she didnt notice i suppose. as for my mind, mama i wish i knew.

[shesgoingtonyc]

okay actually didnt get brain facts done.

all of brain facts for tomorrow. no excuses.

practice problems on unit 1 ap stats

maybe an hour of sat prep

Things I want to have done between today and tomorrow: 

finish chapters 1, 2, 3 of Brain Facts 

start on chapter 4 of Brain Facts

start on unit 1 of AP Statistics and finish atleast one module

finish an episode of rings of power w my sister

[shesgoingtonyc]

5.10 pm and atleast I've done way more than one module of AP Stats. I finished an entire unit actually so love that for me.

Didnt do any of the brain facts yet but ive still got seven hours so one can hope but unlikely.

watched rings of power w my sis

Things I want to have done between today and tomorrow: 

finish chapters 1, 2, 3 of Brain Facts 

start on chapter 4 of Brain Facts

start on unit 1 of AP Statistics and finish atleast one module

finish an episode of rings of power w my sister

[shesgoingtonyc]

Things I want to have done between today and tomorrow: 

finish chapters 1, 2, 3 of Brain Facts 

start on chapter 4 of Brain Facts

start on unit 1 of AP Statistics and finish atleast one module

finish an episode of rings of power w my sister

[shesgoingtonyc]

Abeeha. Creating this blog with the intention of well..focusing on my life. I spend a lot of time on Tumblr, so this blog is my way of keeping me accountable. The primary purpose of this blog is for me to hold myself accountable for my school work, posting my poetry, and journaling. But I also want to use this blog to see how I spend the new year as well, about the movies I watched, the books I've read, the quotes I've loved, the new ambitions and hobbies I take up. I want this space to reflect how much I've tried to improve the quality of my life. I'm going to try to be my most vulnerable self here. I'll probably crosspost a lot of stuff with my main. 

Please feel free to interact. I'm always up for conversations.

tags: #in the grind we trust -> studying stuff and to-do lists #journaling for my sanity -> daily diary/journal entries #my life all mine -> enjoying my life (books, movies, quotes, etc) #an attempt at poetry -> what it says, havent used this yet, may try sometime this year

[shesgoingtonyc]

a girl who’s going to do big things cannot let small things get to her