sheepfics

[sheepfics]

*uses an em dash and a colon in the same sentence* we're done when i say we're done.

[sheepfics]

Schlocktober: A Fake Event Where Anything Goes

While other people are out here dropping Kinktober prompt lists with 9000 stipulations, I bring you this.

It's not a real October event, but it could be if you believe. The prompts are here for anyone to enjoy anyway.

Why "schlock"?

It means trash/junk, and that's the quality of content I'm striving for with these prompts. It's also fun to say.

But, y'know, if you want to take a prompt and turn it into a masterpiece of a whumpy longfic, go for it.

What fandom is this for?

Whatever fandom you want.

What ships can I write/draw?

Any of them.

Even [my fandom's most despised ship]?

Especially [your fandom's most despised ship].

What if I want to combine prompts? What if I want to write or draw things out of order? What if...

Go for it.

Are crossovers okay?

Do. Whatever. You. Want.

What if I want to create something problematic?

Send me the fucking link.

What does [prompt] mean?

You tell me. It's all open to interpretation.

Are there any rules at all?

Sure.

No AI use. If you need an LLM to write your schlock for you, consider a long walk off a short pier. If you need it to do your editing for you, use a beta reader instead. A stick figure drawn on the back of a napkin is better than soulless AI art.

Tag appropriately. 'Creator Chose Not to Use Archive Warnings' means anything goes. 'No Archive Warnings Apply' means your work is guaranteed not to contain any of the major archive warnings (non-con, major character death, graphic violence, or underage sex).

No irl bigotry. Your characters can be problematic as all get out, but if you try to post a weird pro-JK Rowling essay or something you're not going in the collection, bud. Don't kill the vibes.

What are the vibes?

Just have fun.

But other people are having fun wrong!

Shut the fuck up.

Are you going to be doing this?

Probably not.

How do I participate?

There's an ao3 collection right here:

Schlocktober on ao3

Otherwise, just hashtag #schlocktober or something, idk. I don't expect anyone to actually do this.

Text version of the prompts under the cut.

Day 1:

Quadruple Fisting

Inappropriate Use of Labubus

Sex-Related Injury

Day 2:

Quesadilla Cocksleeve

Taking Notes During Sex and Grading It

MyPillow Humping

Day 3:

Erotically Burning Hair

Nostril Worship

Fuck or Live

Day 4:

Gap Tooth Kink

Pegging with a Square Peg

Peeling Sunburn

Day 5:

Not Squirting, Not Pee, but a Secret Third Thing

Nipple Sounding

Enemas to Lovers

Day 6:

Defiling a Puritan

Room Temperature Play

Edging on an Edge

Day 7:

Bidets

Too Many Legs

Shallow Throating

Day 8:

Lingerie Made of Crabs

Not Water Sports, but Water Leisure

Masturbation Pollen

Day 9:

Nonconsensual Consent (NCC)

Afterneglect

Last Time

Day 10:

Human Centipeding

Ball Slapping

Fuck or Die Trying

Day 11:

Sex on Meth

Plucking Hair by Hand

Harem on Strike

Day 12:

Second-Hand Creampie

Haggled Use

Age Progression

Day 13:

Cactus Insertion

Antibreeding Kink

Mechanical Bull

Day 14:

Banned on TikTok

Predator/Predator

Prey/Prey

Day 15:

Scissoring with Scissors

Butterplay

Cannon (Artillery) Compliant

Day 16:

Dueling Gloryholes

Inedible Cum

Purple Nurple

Day 17:

Pimple Popping

Lap Riverdance

Pain Without Pleasure

Day 18:

Nonconsensual Soloplay

Weakness Kink

Genital Swap (Not Whole Body)

Day 19:

Chip Clip Nipple Clamps

Spatchcocking

Wound Fucking

Day 20:

Boot Blasphemy

Understimulation

Gamma/Delta/Sigma (G/D/S)

Day 21:

CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Torture)

CBT (Cock and Ball Therapy)

Asparagus

Day 22:

Autocannibalism

Actual Jackhammering

Extrasensory Deprivation

Day 23:

Going in Dry

Aroused by the Smell of Rubber Cement

Sterilization Ritual

Day 24:

Genitals Stuck in Zipper

Ennui Kink

Earwax Wax Play

Day 25:

Actual Handcuffs (They're Under Arrest)

96ing

Sex as a Sedative

Day 26:

Hospice Roleplay

Gas Station Sex Pills

Balls So Blue They're Practically Purple

Day 27:

Extreme Temperature Cockwarming

Promiscuity Cage

Salt Daddy

Day 28:

Sex with Crocs

Anal Toeing

Breaking a Sex Contract

Day 29:

Coming in Someone Else's Pants

Clowns

Cloning Gone Wrong

Day 30:

Lube As Spit

Pet Work

Clear Showers (Character Is Adequately Hydrated)

Day 31:

Pumpkin Seed Snowballing

Candy Apple Coating

Ghost of a Sex Offender

[sheepfics]

If you see this you’re legally obligated to reblog and tag with the book you’re currently reading

[sheepfics]

yeah bro it's a character study. the 2 thousand words of blowjob is vital to the study of the character

[sheepfics]

someday i will write an essay on the way fandom likes to recreate the exact same flavor of aggressively heteronormative relationship dynamics in every popular slash ship ever invented regardless of how the characters behave or interact with each other in canon.

[sheepfics]

I am putting Shang Qinghua in incredibly specific blenders. Come read him smoke in his dingy apartment and then try and rebound from a breakup he initiated by fucking his Biggest Baddest Villain.

Chapters: 19/19 Fandom: 人渣反派自救系统 - 墨香铜臭 | The Scum Villain's Self-Saving System - Mòxiāng Tóngxiù Rating: Mature Warnings: Major Character Death Relationships: Shang Qinghua/Tianlang-jun, Mobei-jun & Shang Qinghua Characters: Shang Qinghua, Tianlang-jun Additional Tags: Implied/Referenced Suicide, Post-Canon, Reverse Isekai and Transmigration, Unhealthy Relationships, Smoking, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, Self-Hatred, Non-Explicit Sex Series: Part 2 of Airplane's Last Flight Home Summary:

Shang Qinghua hates being cornered.

Shang Qinghua wants to go home.

Sometimes, the only way home is through a different realm.

And sometimes, you pick up your Biggest, Baddest, Evil Demon along the way.

[sheepfics]

If anyone wants a fic where Tianlang-Jun lounges around in a Hawaiian shirt. This is the fic. 

Chapters: 19/19 Fandom: 人渣反派自救系统 - 墨香铜臭 | The Scum Villain's Self-Saving System - Mòxiāng Tóngxiù Rating: Mature Warnings: Major Character Death Relationships: Shang Qinghua/Tianlang-jun Characters: Tianlang-jun, Shang Qinghua Additional Tags: Reverse Isekai and Transmigration, Post-Canon, Unhealthy Relationships, Domestic, Smoking, Non-Explicit Sex Series: Part 1 of Airplane's Last Flight Home Summary:

Tianlang-Jun has been banished to the Heavenly Realm.

He does not know how or why he got there. (He does not really care)

He is offered an opportunity to escape. (By someone he did not expect)

Who is he to pass that up?

[sheepfics]

Scum Villain character by the noise they make in bed

Shen Yuan: naturally very vocal but he actively bites it back. Moans border on yelling.

Shen Jiu: iron trap. He has to be 8 consecutive rounds deep to make a single noise and even then it’s going to be the quietest little “ahh-mm” you’ve ever heard.

Luo Bingge: focuses on talking his wives through it. He’s not actually enjoying the sex all that much.

Luo Bingmei: cute, high little “ahh mmm please yes mnnn”.

Yue Qingyuan: doesn’t make any noise. No matter how long he’s been at it, no matter how much he’s enjoying it. He’ll try if you ask him to but it will sound very awkward and forced.

Liu Qingge: easy to work up into pitchy moans. If you work him into overstimulation he starts whimpering and crying.

Shang Qinghua: moans like a porn star. Ruins it by saying shit like “hot diggity dog” “zoowee mama” “awooga” and “hot tamales”.

Mobei Jun: he purrs.

Tianlang Jun: moans like a porn star. Ruins it by saying shit like “daddy likey”.

Zhuzhi Lang: whimpers. Soft, high whimpers that get a little louder the longer you go, but not by much.

Sha Hualing: groaning and yelling.

Liu Mingyan: a few grunts, otherwise she’s too busy taking mental notes.

Su Xiyan: too focused on dirty talk for moaning. Be a good puppy and do all the moaning for mommy.

[sheepfics]

personally I think an underutilized ship dynamic is "this is so ill-advised that we are both aware on some level that it cannot possibly end in anything but a breakup so acrimonious that we'll spend the rest of our lives hunting each other for sport, but we have decided to keep making out with each other anyway."

[sheepfics]

i am about to create an au SO self indulgent. the target audience is 1 person and that person is me

[sheepfics]

I'm working on something. I promise.

[sheepfics]

all those posts that are like "why am i researching currency debasement in the 1860s for a fanfiction no one is going to care" are full of shit, i just DNFd a fic for being obviously incorrect about the history of plumbing

[sheepfics]

I do think the fandom has the unfortunate habit of babifying Shang Qinghua, due to both shipping and crocodile tears. I personally like the fact he’s a stone cold shark.

This guy set up an event so deadly it killed a significant number of teenagers— some from his own peak that he trained personally— without any visible trace of remorse. SQQ spent years wallowing in the guilt of throwing his little sheep into the abyss, which he knew he would survive. Meanwhile SQH did that and an unknown amount of other shit without batting an eyelid. That man would sell you out for pocket change.

No wonder Mobei Jun thinks he’s hot. Murdering someone in cold blood must be the demonic equivalent of a sexy hair flip.

[sheepfics]

Shout out to the people out there with friends who are active in the fan spaces you're also active in. If you and your pals are all into the same thing at the same time remember how baller the feeling is.

[sheepfics]

I ♥️ putting Shang Qinghua in a blender

[sheepfics]

Man. Me and my curse of writing the same fic from two different POVs

[sheepfics]

Will the Three Other Guys who think Tianlang-Jun/Shang Qinghua is a funny idea please come forward.

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: 人渣反派自救系统 - 墨香铜臭 | The Scum Villain’s Self-Saving System - Mòxiāng Tóngxiù Rating: Explicit Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Relationships: Shang Qinghua/Tianlang-jun Characters: Shang Qinghua, Tianlang-jun Additional Tags: Anal Sex, Anal Fingering, Hand Jobs, Canon-Typical Body Horror, Crack Relationships, Chubby Shang Qinghua, Look I Do Not Have An Excuse For This One, Hook-Up, Breeding Kink, Switching Summary:

Shang Qinghua wrote some bad baihe when he was a disciple. Now his protagonist’s overpowered dad wants to fuck him.