shawnbcker-blog

[shawnbcker-blog]

My list of killers and moochers then breaks and accidents!

If anyone wants to know who killed and stole from us it was Cal Quendi who killed me, and I was too busy with therapy to protect an asshole who stole our things and killed me there is no statute if limitations for murdering me with an illegal drug that killed me, my plans, and dreams, anyone of my friends can search him out he was from Kentucky and named Ken and he deserves worse than I ever did, like he lied and said he had EMT training and to do CPR correctly you're supposed to pull the person onto a hard surface and he caused me anoxia/hypoxia which destroyed my basal ganglia and pretty much my whole life, so if any of my friends want to search him out he blocked me from http://eboka.info where I was GratefulDad there, so if anyone wants to search him out and I am sure Kisha Walker remembers the bum P.K. Effect who lived off of us and told me he knew how to do a bunch of things while he lived off of us for free and I think he showed us other people's pictures because all he did was live off of our food and bought alcohol and cigarettes. He never once offered to do anything he said he could do, I always had to show him personally when to do what and how, so I think he got kicked out of his girlfriends house for being a bum, because all he did was use our internet all day, ate our food, and didn't do a thing he said he could and I had to personally show him how to do everything and he never would just go do the things when it was time I always had to ask him to help, with all the knowledge you both said he had, All he did was buy cigarettes, alcohol, and talked bad about me but he rarely helped me with any chores, payed no rent, bills or for any food or anything and he had the nerve to talk about me well everyone who cares about me Cal Quendi on Facebook and Calaquendi on https://mycotopia.net/, http://eboka.info/index.php am GratefulDad there but if you all can send me his pictures and location from Cal Quendi on Facebook that has pictures and locations, just label me a close friend because he is the one who stole a bunch of stuff and killed me, with no remorse, so if anyone wants to search him on Mehamphetamine on Facebook, I would love screenshots of my posts by GratefulDad on http://eboka.info/index.php , but the only way to get pictures and locations is on Facebook, but you can read most of his useless posts by Calaquendi, and the administrator P.K. Effect who blocked my access, but that was only temporarily, I can get on now fine and loggged  to the site fine now, I was  going to say that was my intellectual property but but I had no problem logging now, I could have pobably probably found it on https://archive.org/ the wayback machine probably has all the posts by GratefulDad because I haven't posted anything but a little bit about my accident that was his fault so if you have to send him a friend request to see his page, I wouldn't suggest anyone he knows like my family because he met all of you when we lived in Coloubus, but anyone else that doesn't know him but knows me I don't mind if you all can see his page, I don' know if he's public or friends only because I asked him about things he took and my death but I had it set so no one could see my questions but him and he blocked me on Facebook and now I think he removed the site but I found my extraction in MindVox and he deleted my extraction with purification that was way more thorough then anything he ever posted until Chris Jenk's ibogaine extraction on YouTube. But my extraction has more purification and Hcl is way more stable than freebase, like freebase loses potency within days, but Cal  Quendi on Facebook  or Calaquendi on htp://mycotopia.net and http://eboka.info/index.php but is real name  is Ken, Kenneth, or Kenny but he's the one who  killed me, stole from us, and left Methamphetamine baggies in the bathroom, and ran, so he caused my pain and deserves the same thing at least and I have friends that would like to hold the right person responsible I bet P.K. backed up the data and is waiting for it to blow over how they ruined my brain and life, so it's never going to blow over but my injuries will never get better, so I've been protecting a lying, stealing asshole because I was consumed by trying to recover and though I won't ever fully recover everyone has my permission to return the favor, and I am counting on my loved ones to handle the situation I can't anymore because of how bad he ruined my life in many ways and even if I spend at least 3 hours a day, every day, I will never fully recover I could have lived had he taken a look at me and told me I was too skinny and he wouldn't do it without an EKG(ECG) but he just wanted money for methamphetamine, plus he didn't care and kept our valuables, so he killed me, stole from us, ruined our lives, plans, and dreams and never even apologized, and I am sure my family can remember P.K.Effect's name and I can find his server and his service, so I will figure how to find them both and teach them the same lesson, with a little help from my family and friends, just wait the site may change but that's years of information to be lost for good, yeah right! I will find it no matter if what and I remember every post and still found my extraction on MindVox and it was posted by Patrick J. Kroupa, and there's the Ibogaine Dossier for steps to follow before doing it.. So everyone look up Cal Quendi on Facebook, that liar has to learn the same lesson he taught me, has to be taught the same lesson with a little help from friends and family, I would do it myself but maybe I will eventually get everything back but I have been at this for three and half years and the pain has only gotten worse and I won't be satisfied until I can teach them the same lesson those assholes deserved for years. I'm going to try and post this all but may have to split it up into several posts, we'll see now!

I was dead for 35 minutes and like Astronauts returning from weightlessness of space they have to do physical therapy to prevent osteoporosis or osteopenia and I told them I had a history of opioid abuse and they told me it would be easy to come off Percocet, but instead of waking up clean, they put me on an ungodly amount of Methadone and they didn't tell me it lowers testosterone, which weakened my bones and being weightless in a coma for 40 days which I broke my wrist and clavicle on my skateboard, so when I met my caregiver and Dead Head tour buddy, I told her I had a girlfriend and family I didn't want to lose but my Mom was infatuated with her and had an agenda and asked my friend and caregiver to move in, but I sat my Mom down and told her I had a true love and 3 kids and now 2 grandchildren, so she lied to all of us and told me my friend had nowhere to live, which I'm just finding out was a lie and that my friend had plenty of peoppe asking her to move in. That was only one of many lies my Mom told, so she said in the hospital that she had a flexible schedule, so she would be able to be my backup, and that was a ploy so she could pass the buck onto my friend, and she never could back me up, so the first time I said my left leg was hurting and I scooted to the end of the bed and stood up, and broke my left hip, first, then I was on a day pass from MetroHealth, and my leg was twisted too much, and my Mom thought she would help by pushing me while my leg was twisted too much and I was trying to pick up my foot and she leaned on my left hip and broke it again the first time they put pins in my hip and I was trying to lean over to my hip trying to pick up the trash to put it closer and the pins came loose, so they did another surgery and fixed my left hip again and they put me on so much pain meds I woke up with a 2 year monkey on my back, so instead of waking up clean they put in my records that I was an overdose, when I was actually a detox and I woke up not smoking but on so much opiods it lowered my testosterone and weakened my bones, and lowered my sex drive, too. So because of lying doctors, family, and friends, I had constipation issues, so I was way more independent and I was about to go visit my family and kids and drank some milk of magnesia and was in a hurry to get to the bathroom and I fell and shattered my femur when we would usually have someone in front, someone behind, and someone to help me walk up the stairs on my side but I was in such a hurry, we didn't take all the usual precautions, so on top of not putting special boots or shoes my toes and ankles were pointed down and I woke up from my coma with a great loss of motion and curled toes and when I shattered my femur they didn't measure and my left leg was 3 centimeters shorter so on top of having a normal stance, I was lopsided and I had to walk on my left pinky toe which is so painful as hell and it feels like every time I stand I am not only lopsided but I feel like my toe is about to break and since my left leg is so much shorter I have to step with my left leg first which is excruciatingly painful so much, so I had worked up to walking a half hour a day and then they were pushing me too hard in therapy and was standing with all my weight on my right leg, I said "I can't stand anymore and I feel like I am about to snap!" and then we heard that awful sound and "SNAP!" And that sound again and I broke my right lef again just from standing on it and it broke my right leg, so it broke and I was non-weight bearing for 6 months and after 2 years in therapy I got burnt out and took the summer off and I had started back walking and doing stairs again with lots of help, but I was starting to gain some independence again we were going to start looking for a basket so I could carry stuff around with me and that August of 2015, we found out my Dad had his first heart attack at 44 and was dying at 69, so we went down there and my half brother Joseph wouldn't let us in the house because Joseph said "He didn't have anything to do with him in life, I don't want anything to do with his death until my cousin let slip there was maybe $10-!00,000 in the house and there were cars and my Dad's belongings he got on a plane the next day and flew out there the next day, and my dad was up walking around and talking before Joe showed up, and we called my Dad and said, "Do you want us to come down and see you?" and all we heard was a loud "Sure!". So we tried to make it down and the next day Joseph called and said our Dad's dead and I just broke down in tears even though the last time I saw him I was 12 and he and his wife who almost died in a bad car wreck, so I was down there skateboarding and was scared to go on roller coasters, which all my Dad wanted to do, that and they had to go to a funeral for my Dad's ex-wife who almost died in that car accident, all we did was sit around and watch regular TV, my Dad was to cheap/frugal to ever pay for cable or internet or even a cell phone, all he had was regular TV channels and a landline, that's all he ever spent on technology. So we sat around and watched TV, and when I first got there we all went to Six Flags Over Texas, and while his ex-wife went to her Dad's funeral, I was down there visiting his exes cabin, when I was awakened by her busting out in tears over her Dad dying. So I skateboarded and watched TV with my Dad. So that was my history with my Dad except for When he called once when I was getting ready to fly to The Netherlands the first time to do ibogaine legally because I had an addiction to opiates/opioids when I was from 18 to 21 which started with OxyContin and developed to heroin because it was cheaper than finding pills, the first time I bought them for like $6-8 and soon they were $10 and but I've heard that they can be up to $1 a mg, even nowadays that's ridiculous but using psychedelics made me want to better myself, so I had some interesting eye opening experiences that made we want to do good things like expand peoples awareness and consciousness, so I moved to California where my favorite things were in abundance, plus I toured with the Grateful Dead from 1995 and still getting out once in awhile to close shows and there is always something live and tapers that broadcast live shows over UStream but I was clean and totally organic for 11 years before I fell and broke my wrist and my left clavicle, and wrist I've had many broken bones the first time was my right clavicle when I was like 15-16 I was first tripped. Then I was like 27 I broke my right wrist trying to go off launch ramp that moved and then when I was like 23 I broke a few ribs getting jumped by 3 people in the ghetto, so I moved to California at 34-35 I broke my left wrist and clavicle skateboarding I landed an impossible wrong and the skate board flew out from under me and I fell and decided I was getting too old to do the things I loved as a teen, so I gave it up and then I told that I had an opioId problem when I was young and they told it would be easy to quit, such a low dose well I woke and being around stinky smokers made me want to hit my friends vape pen and soon I wanted bigger clouds and higher wattage's because I liked a little throat hit but a lot of clouds and flavor, so anything under 75 watts was disappointing to me, so I started with a 20 watt Istick, then 50 watts and then a Sigelei 150 Watt with a TFV4 was the best setup I owned and thanks to the coi-lmaster I got to try a bunch of different drippers but you really have to pay attention and make sure you don't hit it too hard for too long or you have to keep changing wicks and really watch out for burnt hits, I prefer a sub-ohm fill and vapor tank that can hold a lot of juice at least 5mls and I have to fill it sometimes 3-4 times a day but I started at 24 mgs and that quickly dropped to 12 mgs after I started to get the clouds and hits I wanted I dropped to 6 mgs. then 3 mgs, and since I broke my tank and couldn't figure out to replace the replacement glass I wasn't getting satisfying hits with only 30 wat1t Istick and I usually am laying down I started getting a little a little congestion from laying down so much, I lost strength, posture, and I am sure bone density too, plus I was a candidate for pneumonia, plus my caregiver will tell me she is going to nap or, not but she always falls asleep right after she leaves the room or up right while I am she tells me wait until this time and she shows up right as I'm trying to do something like type up this post so I am writing this post, so as soon as you are read trying, I can save it, and I heard and her boyfriend laughing, So I figured she was still up laughing that she would rather wait until I take my anti-spasm medicine, so here goes by another day without at least standing, or even sitting up today and trying to do calf raises on what feels like I'm breaking my left curled pinky toe, and I asked could she help me stretch and flex like my left shin feels like it's hurting like a shin splint and I'm afraid I might stand up but then it feels like I might break my shin from just standing up, like the longest I've made it was side-stepping to the commode or wheelchair my when I used to be able to walk the shower now the longest I've been able to stand was side-stepping to the commode or wheeling my wheelchair with me into the bathroom, pivot, and sit on a hard shower chair when I used to have a bench, I needed a padded bench, so that's something Medicaid or Social Security Institution won't pay for like a recliner that helps me stand up and dental implants, that my dentist recommended that cost $2,000-$2,500 per tooth and most people can't afford $80,000 not even me but I just need enough to chew and I still have my left top molars and some bottom and top front teeth, that's how I have to eat now, so I can get 10-20, so I can eat normal but I eat now with only my front teeth, thanks to me getting put on an ungodly amount off Methadone and the biggest habit, I've ever had and detox centers only help you through the first week when it takes 2 weeks to come down 2 mgs and withdrawing off of it a little bit through whole thing and once you come off down to 40 mgs of Methadone and a whole month of withdrawal and certain meds can help but Ibogaine kept me totally clean for 11 years until I fell and broke my wrist and clavicle which I also fell having a tiny girl trying to go to he bathroom and it healed sort of crooked and also I broke my metatarsal, or what is commonly known and is called a boxer's break around 2010, and I just dealt with the pain and swollen hand and left hand third knuckle or right next to my pinky on my left hand, so I've survived through the pain of a super swollen a broken hand and ribs the only I ever took opioids was for compound fractures except my hand, which totally healed wrong like my left hand boxer's break and I only started opioids for true pain from major or compound fractures until I was in a coma for 40 days and nights and I think they may have dropped me since I was in my coma because I fell asleep standing up and fell on my ass without any breaks or injuries I think the 6 months of non-weight bearing helped cause me all the breaks, and so when my half brother Joeseph heard there was a lot of money in the house he drugged up my Dad who would only take 1 or 2 pain pills a day, plus he had a colostomy bag that he had to empty and clean out and I think Joseph heard there was a lot of money, cars and valuable items in the house, he said to my Dad's caregiver go home and get some rest and then he put all her stuff in bags on the porch and wouldn't let her back in because when we finally got there the whole house had been gutted and emptied of all my Dad's collections of valuables and I think he got to make peace with our Father and then OD'ed him because before my Dad's caregiver was thrown out she promised my Dad that she would be there to hold him when he passed and she never got to keep her promise that she would be there to hold him until he found his brother, my Uncle Frank and his dog Spike and that's why I told everyone to block Chris and Jerry Goran and their vindictive the lying assholes, I would overhear talking to my caregiver about my Mom's infidelity , I heard about her cheating with Lynn when I found out she gave up her first child my half sister Lydia who dated a Dead Head, and I heard about my Mom meeting with Kenny a music store owner in my hometown and cheating with both Lynn and Kenny and she was with a neighbor who brutally abused his own kids and he had a secret place in the basement of his parent's and they had a Nazi flag up back there where he made bullets and they were German they had in ground swimming pool, with a diving board and a shooting range way in the back yard and all the newest video games and systems my Mom went to visit Lydia and she dated Lynn, who she gave up Lydia their child for adoption, Michael Koch (pronounced like cook), Mark Mitler, and then she thought she hit the jackpot meeting Jerry Goran, and they got married and I would hear them fight all night about me and I was treated different than any of Jerry's kids like my step brother Jared, and they had two kid's, Joshua Andrew Goran (the cool one who works in a bicycle shop and looks like a hippie), my half brother's Jake who supposedly had mental problem's Jake the youngest who got to live free with my parents until he was like 27, when I either had to pay rent even though they never paid me minimum wage so I worked from about 13-17 under the table, so I didn't qualify for Social Security Disability, only SSI not SSD, even though I worked several jobs as a roofer {industrial}, Sun TV, and sold framed artwork and 3-4 years under the table for my parents who paid $3.50 -$3.75 an hour when minimum wage was $5.50 an hour and they all were allowed to live there as long as long as they wanted when I was given the choice to either pay rent and go to LCCC (Lorain County Community College) or move out, so I tool my true love who's family took me in, where once 11again my Mom took the first opportunity to pass the buck. And I was taken in by my girlfriend's grandmother Ruth Ann Walker (RIP) and so I moved in with my true love and had 3 kid's 94 a boy, 97 a girl, and my 3rd son in 2000, and my oldest is 22 with 2 kids, so yes I'm a Grandfather, all cute, wonderful kids, and two cutest grandchildren, you'll ever see! I love them all more than life itself and they've all had good jobs or are going to school, my daughter was a Manager at McDonald's and now she's going to school to become a nurse and my oldest worked at a nursing home with his Mother, I'm sure I'll have more to say later and my oldest son can freestyle rap off the top of his head amazingly well, I think it would take a lot of hard work but that boy can rap his ass off, I'm so proud of, miss them, and love them so much it physically hurts, but I'm the proudest father to have helped raise such wonderful kids! You can see them all on Kisha Walker's page if you want to see them all, who I've been talking about the grandkids are Taideon Becker and TeShawn Robert Antreas Becker, so I have a legacy already! Amazing beautiful children and grandchildren, so check them out if you get an inkling!

My list of breaks starting with the years or ages in which they happened and why I will set off metal detectors with all the hardware, I think which why I'll have to get a note from my doctor to prove my body is full of mostly Titanium, I think that's okay and doesn't leak into other organs like other metals could. I think that is the reason they use it, anyway here is the start of my list:

1. I broke my right clavicle in 1992-1993 horsing around, I Think I was a Sophmore because I got out of touch typing class, which may be a good thing considering my broken crooked pinky and my left hand tremors, like I have Parkinson's from anoxia/hypoxia which destroyed my basal ganglia and I recommend looking every term I use on Wikipedia or the internet all it takes is picking a search engine and highlighting the word or words you want or need to look up to understand me fully like all it requires is picking a search engine like I recommend like duckduckgo, Startpage or ix-quickpick for secure searching with SSL or there are even more secure ways like routing your searches through TOR, which takes a lot of reading to learn how to configure it properly but anyone can learn how to do it, if they can read and comprehend there is another term to look up like TOR also known as The Onion Router, so no one can trace back to you most of your privacy on the internet, unless your downloading torrents or something but it can make your searches and most internet searches and usage private but you can read all that on TOR's website.

I need daily Occupational, Physical, and I Speech Therapy to try and work on stretching, loosening, and then strengthening my muscle weakness, which took a lot out of me living in Pittsburgh with no food or anyone to go out shopping for me, and I was left more than once with no food except a jar of peanut butter and a box of dry cereal and since I am lactose intolerant, I can't lick a stick of butter without major gas, so even with lactose intolerant pills, cheese still makes me so gassy it hurts, so no dairy, which started in High School and I knew everyday after drinking milk would cause me awful gas and diarrhea.

So I need to dedicate time for Therapy every day, to at least every other day, because everyday an hour spent on each, I started to progress fastest, that way and they gave me several lists of exercises to keep up on at home, but every day but I have to be very careful and work around so many other peoples schedules everyday I am just losing every strength but smarts from reading all over about every subject that even interests me somewhat so I am well informed and can read and write which are two very brain building activities and the other one I had to relearn, after my accident, but I quickly picked that back up and that was doing math on paper the long way but it's easy to type in a problem and easily find the answer online or even a calculator, a calendar and remembering the dates and times everything happened and now a camera that can record times and dates better is essential to building better memory skills, like I can usually remember what happened, the year and the season because of weather and I can look up set lists and dates on where I was touring every show and traveling a bunch every year and during the times off I spent learning and doing hobbies, and I can look back at posts and see what I was learning and what I was doing the times I wasn't on tour like between tours and when I had to take care of family, friends, children and babies, too. So my life was spent doing what were my interests only, but not everything was fun and games and there was a lot of suffering and pain in my life that I didn't want to burden my loved ones with, so although I was open about a lot of things I didn't want to put more pain in the world, which cost me a lot more strife and misery and even killed me for awhile and I acted like the the trustworthy person I have mostly been, I wanted to see in other people but other people take joy in tearing down the ones around them and I hate to say it but most of the world is unforgiving, selfish assholes that just want to put more hurt into the world, so very few people never lied to me and more people than not are lying, hurtful, assholes that just want to spread hate and evil, instead of love and awareness. I think that might be why my kids turned out so well because most of the time I was trying to practice what I preach, and spreading love, kindness, awareness and overall expanding consciousness into the world, instead of being a hater! (end rant...)

2. I broke my ribs getting jumped in the ghetto in Elyria, Ohio and I walked from Elyria to Wellington, you'll have to look up the distance for accuracy a 4 h 4 min (12.4 miles) minute walk it says on Google Maps.

3. I broke my left wrist going off a light weight launch ramp that moved when I was trying a trick on my skateboard around 2002-2003 but it wasn't a compound fracture, so I wore a cast for about 6 weeks until I healed and for that I had a cast on my left arm.

4. I took way too much acid/LSD because I wasn't told each hit was like 10 hits until a couple days later how strong it was and I was like are you sure that's going to be enough because my normal dose was 10-20 hits for a jaw dropping experience then I found out later each hit was like a 10 strip and I took 7 drops and my normal dose around then was like about 5-10 hits, so 1-2 drops would have been plenty at Vegoose in 2005, the papers from the hospital said altered level of consciousness, resolved. On Phil and Friends tour in Las Vegas. And I lost my shit and was swimming toward the channel having visions of the universe and the big bang theory happening and how everyone in the world directly or indirectly effects everyone in world and maybe the universe, as a matter of fact I think that even our small planet in the vast universe effects every other planet in the universe indirectly, probably, and usually.

I woke up in the hospital with no shoes, so I had to walk barefoot down the Vegas strip until I found a Payless and bought some buddies, generic shoes because that was the only store I could find fast and I was barefoot, and they Thorazined me which made me, so out of it I missed the whole second day of shows but I saw Atmosphere and Phil and Friends.

5. I broke my left wrist in Tennessee drinking and I was standing on a hill and fell while trying to piss in the mountainous area on unleveled terrain so, I went to Kentucky and had a metal plate out in my totally broken, compound fracture in my left wrist. I was prescribed Vicodin or Percocet but got clean at home where I detoxed  myself using my own extraction. Maybe around 2007.

6. I broke my left clavicle on The Dead Tour or probably it was Phil and Friends and I lost my shoes again and had no coat and it was pouring rain later that day.. I had to walk to Payless and bought some generic buddies again and had to find my heavyset friend Matt and stayed in Chicago where my supposed friends, who drove me to the show probably just wanted to get rid of me in Chicago, and my supposed new friends just wanted gas money and then drove me to the show wanted to go sleep with this girl he met at the show, she looked more like a punk rocker chick than a Dead Head but she was pretty hot and then when I think they just wanted to get rid of me, and I heard weeks later that they went to her house and had freaky sex over and over for hours, because they towed our car, and they told me they drove around for hours looking for me, and they said I just walked off upset and woke up in the back of a paddy wagon and the cops found me walking around out of it, and I couldn't or wouldn't tell the police who I was and why I was wandering around shoeless and jacket-less and I always wondered if my supposed new friends that picked me up and roofied me also known as Flunitrazepam, also known as Rohypnol because the police saw me wandering around without any shoes and out of my mind, but when I snapped out of it and came to rolling around in the back of the back of the paddy wagon and I started banging on the front wall of the wagon, I guess whatever I told them checked out so they dropped me off in the city and I had to borrow some guys laptop and look up my call records online to find the numbers I had called most recently on the call log was my friend's number I recognized from calling at the show I was hanging out with and I stayed there a week until I got a hold of my Mom and had her buy me a bus ticket back to Athens or as close as the bus would take me and called a friend to come give me a ride the rest of the way home..

7. I was arguing with my girlfriend in maybe 2009 and broke my Ossa tarsi the third knuckle on my left hand I had totally compound fractured what is called Os cuneiforme III and my hand was so swollen I didn't realize I would have needed surgery or to have it re-broken and surgery to fix how low my third knuckle sat so low from the pointer or the one on the left hand next to the pinky which prevented me from learning more and better on the guitar, so I took lessons and learned a bunch of finger strengthening exercises a few chords but it made it almost impossible to hit the right strings with my third knuckle unable to reach the strings with my note playing string finger for chords and note playing hand actually called the Os cuneiforme III.. Another one to look up on Wikipedia if you aren't sure which one I mean.

8. I died because the person I had administering it Cal Quendi, was on speed because my friend lost her Grandmother's wedding ring more sentimental value than the actual ring was worth, we also lost a quarter ounce of great super crystally White Widow, and she found what looked like Methamphetamine baggies in the bathroom and Cal aka Ken, Kenneth, or Kenny, must have left them because no one she or I knew did that stuff, or at least, I thought and I rushed things because my DeadHead friend said and she told this to all The VNA also known as The Visiting Nurses Association were all told if I wanted to move in I had to be clean, and she told Social Workers, Physical Therapists, and Occupational Therapists, all the same story, that if I wanted to move in I had to be clean and I had already used it 3-5 times before and it always worked fine and got me clean after taking my time to get low and get an EKG (ECG)which I told everyone to do at least those 2 things, and then she said she didn't know that but she watched me type out the posts on things to do before taking Ibogaine and it was sort of my fault because I was rushing things because apparently I didn't have to but I felt rushed you can enter into any search engine http://eboka.info/index.php and I am GratefulDad on that website. all my posts they deleted my full extraction and purification I found my type up lower on my page Ibogaine extraction and purification, if you want TA/Hcl/PTA/ (PTA/PTAA), everyone of those I watched the video on YouTube of Chris Jenk's Ibogaine extraction you have trouble reading off a checklist to follow or I recommend watching him do it and using my guide as a checklist to follow because then you have the way I learned and can follow the steps whichever you choose, I recommend watching Chris Jenk's video on YouTube, I suggest watching him do it and then using my write up as a checklist in case you are a visual learner, or you have the way I learned by reading a bunch and learning the way I did by using my write-up as a checklist to go over and make sure you have a checklist that you can go over and check off each step as you do them, so you have both a reference in case you can read and make sure you can read and comprehend it like I had to write up all the steps up and make sure I checked them off each one by one, so I didn't forget a step. I believe it's good to have both ways to learn because I didn't have a visual tool it took me stopping the Ibogaine conference where I could pause or rewind as needed to make sure I had every step and I went back several times and updated and edited it as I was sent more information from Chris and Howard with purification steps added steps as I was given them by the discoverer and first creator Howard Lotsof, There's another search term for you all to put in your search engines of choice.. I learned when they streamed the Ibogaine Conference in 2010-2011, I don't remember the exact date but I am sure you could find it with your choice of search engines...

Really it helps to go through and search from the bottom and start from the first post to learn what all what all I've been going through since I first got taken back to my parents, based on lies and that doesn't talk about how I would sleep outside on picnic tables and walk to catch the bus at the closest place which was either Wellington or Oberlin, Ohio, the first college to allow black people who were just looking to have the same chances to succeed as a basic human right the chance at freedom and to succeed the same as I think everyone deserves, to have the chance at equality, freedom, and the benefits that we stole from the Native Americans but I understand that has been the way the world develops by trying to convert the rest of the world to your beliefs whether it be religion, politics or taking over the most land every major king or ruler, which I've never seen the point in trying to take over the world. My motto has always been "Live and let live!" among other beliefs about freedom and wanting the chance at freedom and to pursue their own interests, whatever that is is different than others but the same by some others, whether it be a larger group or smaller and everyone has multiple interests and they get determine their interests most first and what they choose what's their biggest interest first and follow whichever ones are most important to you... Or that's my philosophy anyway...

9. I was feeling sore on my right hip, so I scooted to the end of the bed and "Snap!" My caregiver and friend thought I dropped my phone but no, that was my first break after my coma..

10.I was in therapy and my therapist was pushing me too hard and I said, "I can't stand any longer, I feel like I am going to break!" And she said no you're not, then everyone in the therapy room heard the "Snap!" Again I broke my right hip so they kept me longer and they showed me a X-ray that didn't show the breaks, so I had to use a sliding board for 6 months I was non-weight bearing for 6 months, which only made my bones weaker and they had this nurse try and pick me up but I was still putting weight on it, which may be why the special orthopedist found the break so easily, and the therapist's sent in a counselor to tell me it was anxiety, I said, “It wasn't anxiety, and if it was what was that sound everyone in the therapy room heard?” I had to make an appointment with specialist who proved me right and had it sent to my doctors who were basically calling me crazy and wrong, assholes!

11. I was healing on my discharge date, I leaned over to pull the trash can closer and the pins came loose so they put me onto to non-weight bearing for 6 months, I couldn't go anywhere or do anything, until I was finally healed..

12. I was going to visit my family when it was snowing so bad, I was still able to bend my legs enough that I could bathe and stand up to trim my taint and cut my ball hair and taint and I could trim all my private areas and now I can't ask another person to help me hold up my balls and shave my taint, so I now need help wiping since I can't do it myself because my taint is so hairy, it's the first place to collect poop, because it's so hairy now, the commode isn't deep enough to try and wipe without dipping my hand in poop, which even with a rubber gloves is gross and takes being able to change them out every time, I soil a glove which is almost impossible to do myself because I have to stand on my pinky toe, and my hands start sweating, my ass starts sweating and I start sliding around on the commode, my butt cheeks start pushing together, I can't push poop out of closed butt cheeks, and my hands get so sweaty I can't change gloves without powder or being large enough if they aren't powdered which every time I stand up with my shoes to make my stance less unstable since, I shattered my femur because I drank some Milk Of Magnesia that morning and instead of taking the normal conditions, with a person in front, behind, and one on the side to help me get my leg high enough to take each step which has only got harder and harder step and I had worked up from doing one lap around the Wellington basketball court up to walking a mile and I felt an incredible urge to poop, because I've been on opiods/opiates so long it causes constipation issues, so I have to take Polyethine Glycol also known as Mirilax a full 32 grams and magnesium to help me poop because Senna causes me unstoppable diarrhea, which is just as bad as constipation and I was starting to eat more to try and gain weight, which I had gotten up to 165 lbs. at one point and my normal weight was 150 and now I am 135- 140 at most, so I need to stay eating all organic non-GMO food for getting better nutrition through food instead of eating fast food mostly and my parents and family eat horribly, lots of fast food and GMO food, which lacks the nutrition I need from whole nutritional food, not GMO food and organic tastes better and has more nutritional value..

13. After I shattered my femur, they didn't measure, so now my left leg is 3 centimeters shorter or 1.1811 inches or 1.2 inches would allow me to stand level and my lift is only a half inch, so I need at least 2 lifts to make my stance less lopsided and then there's the fact that every time I try to stand I have to walk on my left pinky toe and here's another term to search spasticity, to look up on Wikipedia or any search engine, that will explain things better like now I have hammer toe deformity, too. But I have the most trouble because walking on my left pinky toe, because it feels like every time I have to put my shoe in my pinky toe feels like it's about to break, so walking on it for years has become, so painful I can't take standing on it let alone walking on it every time I try just to put on my shoe my left pinky toe automatically curls up, that I need to spend hours every day stretching this problem out or it will never get better..

14. When I heard my Dad was dying it took too long I so we asked my Mom to come down because my caregiver couldn't do anything being no relationship, she couldn't even talk to my half brother but I have recordings of there conversations, and my Mom said she could be my backup, well Mother now would have been the time from saving me from breaking my, and here is another term to look up on Wikipedia, inferior pubic ramus, in two places, but she was too busy playing with her new phone while I got the old crappy Samsung Galaxy III with a cracked screen, "I had to ask my caregiver to zip up my jacket, so I didn't keep catching my thumbs on my jacket, I had time to yell out "I'm losing my balance, and now I'm falling!" Nice backup Mom, that would have been your chance to save me from breaking my left wrist which is now wrapped in Titanium and I always feel like I have to poop and I just got better control over my bladder, but I still can't tell until I'm about to poop myself, that I really have to go, and it takes Magnesium and Mirilax (Polyethylene Glycol), go ahead and search that, too. To see how it helps constipation.

Heart attacks run in my Dad's side of the family my Grandfather died at 53-54.  I have 3 kids and 2 Grandkids, too. I have a family that I never wanted to lose, but my Mom lied to us all even though I sat her down and explained that I didn't want to lose my family to a whimsical caregiver but she lied to both of us and got mad when I didn't want to lose my family of over 21 years. But no one listens to the disabled guy and everyone thinks I'm stupid but I am a bit clairvoyant about people and their feelings and I am surprised she lasted 3 and a half years and she still wants to be my caregiver and friend, when my girl is an STNA and before I had a family and died because I rushed things and didn't follow what I told everyone else, because I had gotten clean 3-5 times before I rushed things because I was told if I wanted to move in, I had to be clean, so I ruined my life because several people lied to me and her both but I died for nothing, apparently she said I didn't have to rush , then don't tell me I need to be clean and I took her seriously when she was just a Dead Head tour buddy.

My list of first concerts:

My first concert was Pink Floyd, https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Division_Bell_Tour Cleveland was May 26. 27 or 29, 1994, USA, Cleveland Stadium or, Columbus Ohio Stadium. Then it was Steve Miller, at one of these shows but that was my first outdoor venue at Polaris Amphitheater, Columbus, Ohio, July 06, 1994, Blossom Music Center, Cuyahoga Falls, Ohio or the 10th 1994, then, but that was my first outdoor venue. Then finally it was The Grateful Dead it was an outdoor Stadium when I first saw The Grateful Dead here: Opening was Rusted Root and then the setlist was and you can check it here http://setlist.com/

06/30/95 (Fri) Three Rivers Stadium - Pittsburgh, PA 

Set 1: Hell In A Bucket, West L.A. Fadeaway, Take Me To The River, Candyman, When I Paint My Masterpiece, Bird Song, Promised Land

Set 2: Rain, Box Of Rain, Samba In The Rain, Looks Like Rain > Terrapin Station > Drums > Space > I Need A Miracle > Standing On the Moon, E: Gloria

Comment: Soundcheck included It's A Man's World and Truckin' And it rained during the opening of the second set, they played 3 rain songs, then it magically cleared up, and I was like "These guys control the weather!" LOL!

My story on LSD purity:

You all must get some weak shit or amber or maybe silver crystal, like http://thebear.org/ purity may cost you some yield because turning iso-LSD and d-LSD you get about 75% purity each time you do chromatography on it you get about 75% purity and you just keep running through the column until you get 98-99% pure, And cleanliness is next to Godliness and you want needlepoint crystal or pure white, believe me 20-30 hits of amber will make me puke and silver is sort of iffy but I've had Black crystal that was strong but you don't want to eat too much or puke city! The faster moving stuff when held under a black-light glows and moves way faster than ISO, so you collect the faster moving stuff and keep performing the conversion until you have white pure crystal. The slower moving stuff eventually becomes almost non-existent and then you know you have 98-99% pure white crystal that will break down in distilled water, everything else you need to break down with alcohol and then you better not put that in your eye or it'll burn like hell for awhile and if you do enough, it hits you so fast, it can cause a bad trip especially on a large dose, while puking but a large enough dose will make you vomit, anyway.