shannonmarateemull

[shannonmarateemull]

Hey everyone, here is an update on the release of my documentary film, Preconceived Perception. Last night I submitted it to the documentary film festival, Hot Docs. God willing it will get in. Thank you for your support. Love you lots always. <3

[shannonmarateemull]

Avoidance

I have a tendency to avoid conflict like the plague! I have always been sensitive, in fact I am an empath. When I was a kid, I was shy and quiet, and then I discovered dancing, singing, acting and playing sports and that was my voice and my outlet. My parents blessed me with these opportunities to come out of my shell. However, that didn't stop my empathic ability to feel others' pain and emotions. I was bullied as a kid, so I understood how it felt to be bullied. Thus, being and empath and sympathizing with those people who were also being bullied made me stand up for the kids who were being picked on! I became a champion for the bullied kids even if it meant that I would be further ostracized and alienated. That doesn't sound like an avoider, right?! Well, I always stood up for others, but never for myself! I became co-dependent on others to affirm me, validate me, acknowledge me, praise me, or I didn't feel like I existed. I had very low self-esteem, low self-confidence, I thought I was ugly, and ultimately, I hated myself. I just wanted to be accepted, and to belong. I didn't want to continually be called "crazy" and weird! I didn't want to stick out like a sore thumb! Yet, in reality, I was the epitome of a so-called stereotypical "nerd"; smart, fat, wearing glasses, with braces on my teeth, with short, curly hair, and pimples on my face. And, I was one of the few non-white kids in my school. So, I was the perfect target for bullying and teasing. I had to learn to be less over-sensitive, to care less about what people said and did, to ignore people, to grow a thick skin, to let it roll off my back, but I was just a kid and it took a long time to develop those skills. As a result, I became a people-pleaser, a "yes" person! I could never say "no" when people asked me for anything, or to do anything, or to try anything because I desperately needed them to like me, as if my life depended on it, as if it would be the end of the world if they rejected me. So, I carried these emotional wounds, this childhood trauma with me into every relationship, into my adulthood. I was always compliant, always willing to make other people happy, never willing to rock the boat, or stir the pot, never telling anyone about my inner sadness or pain, never letting people know when I was upset or when something bothered me. I let things fester in me, and then brought them up in arguments months after the fact. No wonder I had bouts of depression. It wasn't until I finally went for therapy and got professional help to deal with all of these deep-seated childhood issues that I found out my biggest fear is the Fear of Rejection, stemming from being bullied as a kid. Then I started the long journey of healing, and now I can honestly say that I love myself! I love the fact that I'm quirky, eccentric, weird, and crazy! I love that I stand out! I love that I fight against injustice and stand up for the underdog! I love that I'm an empath! I am still not confrontational, but I don't avoid addressing issues in the moment as much anymore. I still do from time to time just because I don't want to hurt the other person's feelings and I want to say the words in a tactful, polite, kind way. I care about the feelings of others and I always will, but I don't avoid talking about my feelings anymore either. Avoidance doesn't solve anything, or help anyone ever! We all have to face difficult situations, but with God and courage, all things are possible! Spread the love! xoxo 🙏🏼😘😻💖

[shannonmarateemull]

At our subatomic level everything is made out of the same matter and energy from the Big Bang. It is so mind-blowing to think that absolutely everything is so interconnected. Have you seen a virus or bacteria under an electron microscope? They are beautiful, vibrant, colorful forms of life. It is so paradoxical that such microscopic, and in the case of a virus, submicroscopic entities could be so deadly. Yet, isn't that the way of all life. Humans have the capacity to be so creative, generous, empathetic, humane, caring, constructive, heartwarming, and loving. However, we also have it within us to be so destructive, inhumane, cruel, barbaric, unkind, critical, heartbreaking, hateful, and evil. It's the dichotomy of the universe. Nothing is perfect. Nothing is immortal. Nothing is indestructible. Nothing is superior. Everything is existing together. We are all in this together. Viruses and bacteria have been around for millions of years; long before humans. It's a humbling thing for humans to be put in our place by a submicroscopic life form, but it reminds us that we are only supposedly at the top of the food chain because we put ourselves there. In reality all living things are trying to survive, including viruses. We all have that basic instinct encoded into our DNA. So, I sincerely pray that we will all love each other more, and respect mother nature more after all of this dies down. I pray that we will see how truly connected we all are, and that we will gravitate more towards harmony and love, and away from greed and avarice. God bless you all.

[shannonmarateemull]

Pluralism

What is the meaning of pluralism that I am referring to? I mean the term in philosophy which is, "a theory or system that recognizes more than one ultimate principle" (oxford dictionary). Basically, a world where anything goes. Well, I don't accept that!! I understand that we are all neurally networked and shaped by our environments, so there is obvious programming, conditioning, indoctrination, and downright brainwashing that occurs. So, technically every person's ideas of right and wrong is relative to their familial, cultural, educational, societal, religious, and friends' influnces. Ultimately, following the doctrines of this philosophy, I can't tell someone what they are doing is wrong, because I am pushing my belief system on them, and indirectly I'm supposedly saying that I am better than them. In plurism, that would be wrong. According to this philosophy, it is not ppssible to say what is right and what is wrong. Everything is ok because it can exist at the same time and it is all equal. I wholeheartedly disagree with this idea. I firmly believe that there is a universal moral code where people know right from wrong and we have an innate conscience. I will never accept Female Genital Mutilation. I will never tolerate acid attacks on women or girls. Having sex with babies to prevent AIDS will always be wrong. Trafficking women as sex slaves is reprehensible. Treating women as possessions is disgusting. Looking at women for just sex is totally dispicable. I will never be a part of that kind of pluralistic, or apathetic world. I care about justice, hope, freedom, and love. Spread the love. 🙏🏼❤

[shannonmarateemull]

Canadian Federal Election 2019

Voting is very important. Not only is a chance for citizens to express their opinions about who they want to call the shots regarding their lives, but it shows that people care about what happens in their country. I firmly believe, if you can vote, that everyone should vote. It is a right and a privilege of a democratic nation and there are some places on the planet, like North Korea, where democracy doesn't exist. There are tons of people who would love to be able to vote in certain parts of the world, and yet some people here just don't care enough about politics to go and vote in our democratic society. I find that very disappointing. It is true that sometimes people feel like there isn't any good choice among the candidates, or they feel like they are all corrupt, but they can go and abstain by not marking the ballot to convey the message that they don't like any of the choices. I voted, and I'm proud of that. The Liberal party is my political party, and they won a minority government. But the country is seriously divided. Alberta wants to separate from Canada because they are an oil province and they are anti the environment, and the Liberals are slowing going to phase out oil. Quebec wants to separate because they want to preserve their French language and culture. So, Canada is so far from being united, right now. I just hope that Justin Trudeau will listen more this time, as the Prime Minister and will show more humility. He has the chance to do things better this time. The people have spoken. That is literally what democracy is about; the voice of the people. God bless Canada, and may our leader be able to bring the country together at this divided time. Spread the Love. 🙏🏼❤🇨🇦😘

[shannonmarateemull]

Canadian Thanksgiving

Happy Thanksgiving! Today is Thanksgiving in Canada. We celebrate Thanksgiving ealrier in Canada than the USA, because our harvest season ends sooner than in the US because we are further North and it gets too cold to grow food after October. We have Turkey, corn bread, stuffing, ham, cranberry sauce, gravy, mashed potatoes, sweet potatoes, carrots, green beans, cabbage, apsaragus, apple pie, pumpkin pie, beer and wine. It is when we get together with family and close friends to express our gratitude for the good things we have in our lives. We usually say that we are thankful for our families, friends, homes, jobs, good food, health, safety, and our country (Canada). I love this time of year. I am so thankful for my life. I am especially grateful for my family, friends, food, shelter, clothing, work, creativity, God-given talents, for my awesome country, Canada, and for all of humanity trying to come together to fix the Climate Crisis and trying to help each other with love and compassion. God bless you all! Happy Canadian Thanksgiving. Spread the Love. 🙏🏼🇨🇦🥧🐖🦃🍺💖😘

[shannonmarateemull]

Bullying

What kind of a world do we live in where a 14-year-old boy gets stabbed in the back by a bully, and dies just steps away from his mother's car while bystanders are looking on and recording the whole thing with their phones instead of stepping in to restrain the bully and prevent him from killing and innocent teenager? This upset me so much! I was bullied when I was younger, and so, subsequently, I always stood up for the underdog. The school system supposedly claims to have a zero tolerance policy towards bullying, and yet nothing was done when numerous incidents of bullying were reported. However, the worst indictment of our society, and of our times, is that all of his peers did absolutely nothing to prevent the situation from happening. They just stood there on the sidelines with their smart phones in their hands recording an innocent boy getting stabbed to death in the back. What does that say about our society? I mean, I know that it is dangerous to get involved in an altercation when a weapon is in the picture, and I understand that the police need evidence to convict a criminal of commiting a crime, but nobody even yelled "stop" or "what are you doing?" To me that is the worst part. I am saddened by the whole incident. And I will always be against bullying in all its forms.

[shannonmarateemull]

Can anyone give me some advice on how to market an indie-doc film?

Making My First Film

So, this feature movie that I am making is kicking me in the behind. Why I ever decided to take on such a monumental task is beyond me. First of all, I am not aggressive or competitive in a fairly cut-throat film industry full of hustlers. Second of all, I have never produced anything before in my life! And last of all, my creations are never ever perfect enough for me. I'm my own worst critic. Yet, all that being said, I felt compelled to make this movie. WHY! Because it is not about me! I will hardly ever stand up for myself, but if I see injustice happening to someone else, I will fight for them tooth and nail. So, over a 6 year period I talked to family, friends and strangers about their experiences with people judging them. I got so many stories, and they kept on flowing. I felt compelled to tell as many stories as I could. It became a passion project to give a platform to all of these opinions and voices that I heard. My film is called, "Preconceived Perception." But, now I'm in hell because my movie is uncategorizable! It's like a documentary except not all of the original people I spoke to are in the film, so the characters are fictional but the words are the real words of at least 100 people. Yet, it's not a regular non-fiction movie either because the peoplen in the movie are saying their true stories as well as representing other people's voices. It is not a regular movie because it is mainly talking, and there isn't that much dialogue, action, or beautiful cinematography. So, it is like a documentary that way. However, the plot is fictional. So, now I'm totally confused. Of course, I would have to make my first film complicated! That's just so typical of me! Lol! Why make life easy when I can make it hard! Hahaha! Basically, I think the film is a hybrid documentary. That is what I'm going with! How would you classify my film?

[shannonmarateemull]

Making My First Film

So, this feature movie that I am making is kicking me in the behind. Why I ever decided to take on such a monumental task is beyond me. First of all, I am not aggressive or competitive in a fairly cut-throat film industry full of hustlers. Second of all, I have never produced anything before in my life! And last of all, my creations are never ever perfect enough for me. I'm my own worst critic. Yet, all that being said, I felt compelled to make this movie. WHY! Because it is not about me! I will hardly ever stand up for myself, but if I see injustice happening to someone else, I will fight for them tooth and nail. So, over a 6 year period I talked to family, friends and strangers about their experiences with people judging them. I got so many stories, and they kept on flowing. I felt compelled to tell as many stories as I could. It became a passion project to give a platform to all of these opinions and voices that I heard. My film is called, "Preconceived Perception." But, now I'm in hell because my movie is uncategorizable! It's like a documentary except not all of the original people I spoke to are in the film, so the characters are fictional but the words are the real words of at least 100 people. Yet, it's not a regular non-fiction movie either because the peoplen in the movie are saying their true stories as well as representing other people's voices. It is not a regular movie because it is mainly talking, and there isn't that much dialogue, action, or beautiful cinematography. So, it is like a documentary that way. However, the plot is fictional. So, now I'm totally confused. Of course, I would have to make my first film complicated! That's just so typical of me! Lol! Why make life easy when I can make it hard! Hahaha! Basically, I think the film is a hybrid documentary. That is what I'm going with! How would you classify my film?

[shannonmarateemull]

A True Friend

I know this subject has been talked and written about so many times, but I just want to weigh in as well. What is the definition of a true friend? Well, we are all born into this world with our id, ego, and superego, according to the psychologist, Sigmund Freud. The id comes first as a baby, "I want this now," and we are not thinking of others or what they want. Then we start to develop the superego which tells us, "That's not right. That's not how people act." So, it is our conscience, and our innate sense of right and wrong, and our programming from our parents and society. After that comes our ego, which is a mixture of the id and superego and tries to find a balance between the two. So, most of us will get what we want in a diplomatic way without hurting anyone's feelings. So, does that mean that everything we do has a selfish motivation? Are we friends for self-serving purposes? That is where a person has to question what their friendships are based on. People form bonds over many things, hobbies, sports, fashion, make-up, food, traveling, music, art, literature, TV, film, gossip, family, kids, playing, being neighbors, school, classes, politics, the environment, art, love and so much more. However, those could be considered social friends. What makes a true friend? Well, for me, it is someone who you are there for in times of need and they are there for you in return, in times of need. Someone whom you can confide your deepest secrets in and they won't tell anyone, and you keep their confidences as well. Nobody expects anything from the other person, but they just know that they can count on each other. True friends are not fair weather friends. They can laugh together and cry together. They have a lot in common and yet, sometimes, can be very different. But, the most important thing is the depth of love between true friends. They can't imagine living in a world without each other. It is not romantic love, but it is pure, unconditional, platonic love. That is my definiton of a true friend. I try to be this kind of friend to my dear friends, and I feel blessed because I have the best friends in my life. What do you think makes a true friend?

[shannonmarateemull]

Mood Perspectives

Does the way we view the world change according to our mood? I truly believe it does! Particularly, if I am sleep deprived, I have a very short fuse. Things I would normally be able to tolerate, suddenly rub me the wrong way. For example, I am brown skinned living in Toronto, Canada, which is a very multicultural city, and normally I love being surrounded by a sea of immigrants. But, when I am tired, and I am in a bad mood, I feel like the lone Canadian born, native English speaking person and I wonder where all the white people have gone. But, the irony is the brown people look like me, but they don't sound or act like me. So, I feel strange. But, I don't feel that way unless I am tired, or in a bad mood. Normally, I love the ethnic diversity and highlight it. I just think it's interesting how a mood can change one's perspective. What do you think?