seeinghcsts

[seeinghcsts]

WITH HIS NOSE IN HER HAIR , all thomas can focus on , for a moment , is eliza's smell . vanilla still clings to her , practically woven through the strands of chestnut , but something earthy clings to her , too . almost crisp , like the distant snow cloaked caps of the high reaching mountains . he breathes her in , holding her close , savoring the sanctuary in which their entanglement was , albeit temporarily , safe .

once the footfall was a trust worthy distance , he breathed a chuckle into the side of her head . " not a fan of man hunt ?? " he crooned , though she had just stated that , a taunting lilt to his words implying that he knew that much was obvious . at her question , thomas shrugs — he knows the answer , but he wishes to prolong their seclusion a bit longer . hidden amongst the brush , with nature as their only witness , nuzzling just behind her ear with the tip of his nose .

" are you in a rush to leave me or something ?? " thomas's voice is possessed by a devious purr , words slippery and dangerous as he brushes his lips down her cartilage's spine . thomas's words are hushed , low in his throat , but not because of those hunting for them , , , he hums , a playful disappointment in his speech ; " we haven't had a moment to ourselves since we got here . "

— FOR A MOMENT , SHE resists , wriggling hopelessly in her captor's cage of steel limbs . one hand is around her wrist , heavy like an iron cuff , and another muzzling her venomous tongue . maybe if eliza was not struggling so fiercely , whining in muffled protest against their palm , she would have caught the familiar scent of cedar & mint lingering off hot , freckled skin . or the rumble of amusement in his chest as it came flush to her spine . though , it is not until thomas's lips part , bidding her to submit , does eliza settle in his arms ( finally recognizing who's they are ) . dragged down to the grassy floor and between bent knees , eliza tries to win back her voice , only to be silenced once more by leaves crunching in the distance . heavy footsteps ( two ? no , three pairs ) shake the earth . their opponents show no effort at caution or tactic ; luke must have thought the game was being played in his favor .

slender fingers curl around his , large & calloused , and peel the mask away from pouting lips . " i don't like this game . i'm hot , i'm tired , i lost camille . why can't we just , like , surrender ? " but she can tell ( a rabbit - heart racing in rhythm with the distant footsteps , the eager twitch of his tensed muscles ) , that thomas is as much in the game as the others . fucking jocks . " where's the . . . flag or , uh , end - zone anyways ?? i swear , i must've run around this entire forest twice already . "

[seeinghcsts]

THOMAS KNEW VERY LITTLE ABOUT ISLA WARDWELL , if anything at all . he knew she was kody's roommate , interacted with her in passing while they were dating , but he had never really known her . her entire state of being seemed to be shrouded in mystery , , , that and he thought she hated him .

so , sat beside her at the bonfire , thomas reclined further back in the chair he was sat in , the hood of his sweatshirt pulled up over his head as the metal tip of his hoodie string was being rolled between his teeth . a look over to her as she spoke , brows furrowing before he looked back at the fire she stoked . the hue of her skin seemed to glow in the warm orange and golds of the flickering flames , their colors complimentary in a way that would inspire the finest of painters . " maybe , " thomas replied around the aglet clamped between his teeth .

" — guess this isn't such a bad place for your soul to get stuck , huh ?? the mountains . nature and shit . "

WHEREABOUTS SECURED: SAT AROUND THE BONFIRE.   TRYING VERY DESPERATELY NOT TO CONJURE SOMETHING. @seeinghcsts

the heat by the fire was oppressive enough to remind her of home, sat so close to the bonfire that isla could feel the hurt of it through the cardigan hardly sat on her shoulders. she hadn't set the fire, but isla took the liberty of stoking it, leaning forward from the sagging recline of her borrowed camping chair to toss in another quarter log. isla spoke with soft malice, almost like she didn’t mean to, but she knew it was just the two of them at the fire, and that made things easier somehow. " you think all the ghosts know it's such a nice night out? " she's sat all placid, picking at a smore ( gone mostly cold ) with her fingers — utterly disregarding that she could have said something so conversationally grotesque. " it's a lil' cold but — anything is better than rain. "

[seeinghcsts]

THOMAS THOUGHT HE HAD QUELLED HIS FEAR OF TRAINS and the rickety tracks they rolled upon . the sound of their squealing wheels , blaring horns — driving forward without means of stopping unless coming upon a station . in a way , he was sort of grateful to be here with milo . at the tracks that cut through the mountain , at least . despite their grievances , more so his than theirs , it almost forced him to grapple with the world's lack of tenderness towards one's ailments . the way it didn't slow down , or soften its edges , to make itself easier to chew for anyone . milo's words still manage trigger a lump in his throat , one he swallows down as he shoves his hands in his pockets , teeth finding the inner side of his cheek and gnawing on the skin there .

" no , " he replies flatly . squashed . is that what had happened to his mother ?? no different than a bug on a windshield ?? not torn to ribbons , or bludgeoned , or struck — squashed . with a look back towards where they had come from ; " you should probably be more careful . " but the advice comes out cruel , sharp , as if he had taken milo's carelessness with their own like personal . " — that's just death waiting to happen . "

he finds a nearby tree and bares his weight against it , pulling his hands from his pockets to pick at his cuticles . he hears milo's question , but he has no interest in answering it . thomas can only think about the tracks , about the world and its cruelness ; " don't mention any of that dumb shit in front of camille . " a look to the other , though there isn't any animosity in his eyes . just a big brother concerned for his little sister . then , a sigh , looking back down at his fingers .

" — but yeah , sure , it's uh , , , cool , i guess . "

🫀 : thomas ortesky @seeinghcsts

📌 : railroad tracks (:

⏰ : august 14th, 2023 (1 day before the disappearance of luke sinclair — luke sinclair's birthday)

they're trying with thomas. it feels weird, not going out of their way to piss him off, but there came a point where milo felt afraid they'd ruin everything if they didn't get it together right away. so, they had to put aside their differences, let go of any holdups. it was hard to try and win him over; the fact was, no matter how hard they tried, they both knew milo was never going to be good enough for camille. but they were here to stay. so they take the chance. it's just the few of them alone for the week, ample time to spend together, to build a case for himself. the last two days, however, milo was absolutely failing at their mission. "you ever been on the tracks when a train is coming? i've almost gotten squashed, like, so many times." he's learning he can't really say anything to make himself sound better. half the time, milo doesn't realize until the words are out that whatever they're sharing just furthers their image as a stupid dirtbag. should he just start lying? would thomas like him better then? "i mean like... once or twice." they kick a pebble, watching it bounce off of the tracks "i'm actually very... ʳᵉˢᵖᵒⁿˢᶦᵇˡᵉ..." their voice is getting smaller, and they clear their throat, hand brushing over the top of their head as they search their brain for something, anything to not sound like a moron "it's cool that you're here. not that i didn't think you'd get an invite— i mean, it's cool that we've got, like, mutual friends.. and shit..."

[seeinghcsts]

HE HAD SPOTTED HER ABOUT HALF A MILE AGO ; a galloping gazelle , clumsy in her footfall , arms splayed as she navigated the foreign terrain of the outdoors . it was adorable to witness , sunburnt nose scrunched in devoted concentration , pigtails bobbing behind her , a clear disgust for what was occurring painted across her features .

it had been almost too easy to reach around the tree he had slipped behind , catching the damsel by surprise as he latched onto her wrist and tugged her out of the herds immanent approach . he pulled her spine to his chest , large palm masking her lips ( silencing the very protest that would have given them away ) before sinking down until the two of them were sat at the trunk's base , tented by foliage . " shhhh , " he cooed into her ear , looking over his shoulder to see if the others were coming this way . his other hand wraps around her waist , pulling her between his bent knees , hand still clamped over petals he knew would bloom in protest ; " relax -- it's just me . "

closed starter ,  thomas ortesky  . found in the thick of the woods , amidst the chaos of an intense game of ' man - hunt ' .

— FUCK REEVE AZIZ . she had zero foundation to assume so , and yet eliza was absolutely certain that he had a hand in riling luke up to play this god - awful game . as if sleeping in the woods was not already bad enough . . . now they were running wild , hunting each other like animals . no matter where she turned or how fast her feet carried her , it was impossible for the fawn to evade the thundering of footsteps , following her clumsy trail of crushed grass and lingering vanilla air .

breath coming in sharp , tired gasps , she dares pause for a moment . soft skin meets rough bark as eliza leans into one of the trillion identical trees lining monte cristo's mountain . sadly , though , her reprieve is a brief one . the haunting clatter of chase quickly grows near , and the woman answers with an exasperated whine . reluctantly , her back straightens and she braces for another half - hearted sprint , but something stops her first . or , someone . a hand closes around her delicate wrist and pulls , dragging eliza behind the large tree she'd been lounging against . " OWW , that hur -- !! " she cries out before a heavy hand can slap over her mouth , cutting the princess's whines off short .

@seeinghcsts

[seeinghcsts]

TWO HANDS RAISE IN PLAYFUL SURRENDER , following the shaking of his head as he lifts his shoulders . " nothin ' nothin' . 's not supposed to mean nothin' . . . " he said , a laugh interwoven amongst the defensive statement that had his lips drawing up in a grin . palms then drop , coming to hook thumbs into the fronts of his pockets , leaning his bare lower back against the counter's edge as he exhales a held breath , another dry chuckle riding on its heels . " you've always been somethin' else , never said that was a bad thing , " he offered , a look delivered in her direction beneath the weight of alcohol-weighted lids . his stare became locked , unmoving , before it shifted to the doorway leading to the living room . surveying the ebbing sea of sweat-slicked bodies , looking for kody amongst the tides of raised solo cups and glitter painted faces .

his jaw tightens , his expression suddenly souring . an irritated look sent in her direction now . " if i keep self-sabotaging ?? " he repeats , not attempting to hide the annoyance that now wrapped around his words . a roll of his eyes , suddenly pushing himself off the counter so he was now a few steps closer to her . thomas levels the woman with a look , one that is veiled in impenetrable fog that makes it practically unreadable . he lowers his voice , causing it to sound like an agitated purr as he tightens his jaw . he speaks through grit teeth , but his words aren't angry . in fact , it almost sounds as if the man is , in some wicked way , amused ; " see , t h i s is just more proof you're the same ol' liza — always finding a way to get under my fuckin' skin . "

retreating , though his gaze remains , thomas only breaks their eye contact when his move to roll in his skull . he moves towards the fridge , opening it , retrieving two cans of shit beer which he stacks on top of each other to be held in one hand . " beats me . i'm not responsible for her lap dog , " then , turning back to face her , he uses his unoccupied hand to ruffle the slightly frizzed hair at her crown . a more playful look has returned to thomas's features , his head cocking as he looked down at her with an almost nefarious mischief in his eyes ; " i suggest tryin' a dog whistle , that'll catch their attention for sure . " then , he moves to pass her , turning his back as he gives a mock salute . " i'm gonna go seek out treatment for my happiness allergy , , , best of luck , though . "

— THE DIP IN HER waist notched comfortably against the island's granite rim , her head lazily tilting to the side , too , as she leaned away . there was a blankness cast over her face , like not a thought existed behind those glittering , drink-glazed eyes . she'd gotten so good at playing dumb , it was sometimes hard to forget she wasn't — not entirely . empty pupils , large splotches of spilled ink , gave the man a quick once - over , narrowing only when they dragged back up to meet his own pools of thick , malted chocolate . " what's that supposed to mean ? " an perfectly sculpted eyebrow arched upward , matching nicely with the hand placed atop her other hip . " i'm the same-old liza , aren't i ? "

sure , a near - decade was a long time , but she was still her . camille's best friend , decorated in hues of pink . a crown of curls , pale brown tickling just below her waist . stubborn , spoiled , and a bit melodramatic at times . always ( well , almost always ) wearing her heart on her sleeve . " and you're the same stupid tommykins . kody's a smart girl , though . " or so she assumed. eliza had never really bothered to cultivate anything beyond an ' acquaintanceship ' . " i'm pretty sure if she thought she could do better , she would . i know you & cammy have , like , mommy-issues beyond the help of modern therapy . . . but if you keep self-sabotaging , you're gonna end up sad and alone and , " green eyes fell away , as did the slight simper toying by the edge of her lips . " ugh , nevermind ! keep being allergic to happiness . i'm gonna go make some of my own —— have you seen cam's boy - toy ? they have my . . . candy . "

[seeinghcsts]

with a brotherly scoff , and an ' annoyed ' roll of his eyes , thomas batted away camille's hand to knock it away from an already disheveled head of curls . " alright , enough . CHRIST , cam , you're gonna give me fuckin' vertigo if you keep tryna knock around my head like that . " melodramatic as ever , the elder ortesky was . his eyes track the cup camille had carelessly discarded on the floor , finishing off his own beer and tossing it alongside her discarded beverage . then , the countdown for how long he'd survive at this function without a drink-in-hand began to tick down . a winding clock with steadfast hands .

bleary eyes returned to his sister , a brow cocked as his lips twisted into a scowl . " from the title's alone , i have my doubts , , , but you're the one with music taste , so i'll trust you . just this once . " he then rubs at his chin , glancing over camille's shoulder before looking back at his sister with a raised brow . " well , you in the mood to keep disappointing some dare officers ?? i know where they're keeping all the extra shit . " because he bought half of it .

the playful frustration that flickered on his features, just as the light reflected off glitter, had been the exact reaction camille was looking for when they poked the bear. ❝            and now you’re telling me to fuck off ? that’s two strikes in about twenty seconds. i didn’t know it was possible to catch douchebag from hanging out with them. i had my theories, but this ? ❞ their hand lazily reached across to mess with his damp curls.  ❝ scientific breakthrough. don’t worry, i’ll name it after you. sinclair would get too much of an ego boost from it. ❞

❝ you’re ridiculous. and irrelevant. ❞  the last of her drink thrown back, cup discarded in the growing stack at their feet. at least the frat boys had some kind of system going ?  ❝ there are no anti drug or alcohol themes in american idiot. in fact, that kinda stigmatised language only further cements your position. ❞ the ONLY one, however… ❝ here ? ❞ shamelessly motioning to the party raging on around them. ❝ absolutely not. here ? ❞ this time motioning just between the two of them. ❝ for sure. if i was a green day song, it’d be burnout. or extraordinary girl. ❞ not that she expected thomas to remember. more accurately, counting on him not to.

[seeinghcsts]

thomas allowed himself to be steered away by kingston , a look of confusion being cast over his shoulders at the guys who were deliberating , quite passionately , about the answer the two of them had given in regards to their debate . thomas offers a loose shrug of his shoulder , dismissing the apology with a trill of his lips . " nah , man , you're fine . ' tommy-ing ' forgiven , , , whatever the fuckin' hell that means . "

thomas then rolls his shoulders back , bringing a hand to scratch at the back of his neck . " yeah , i don't fuckin blame you , " a look off to the side , a subtle scan of the terrain . " this party just feels like it's gettin' weirder by the fuckin' second , yeah ?? "

❝ Thank you, ❞ Kingston let out a breath of relief, as if he had been holding it in fear of Thomas choosing the wrong answer, letting him down in front of this group of people he truthfully couldn't care less about. ❝ I fuckin' knew you'd get it. His beak would be huge, too, dude! Motherfucker could just swallow them whole. ❞ With that, he placed his palms on the ground, pushing his body weight into standing position. ❝ Sorry, guys, I gotta surround myself with similarly minded people, no hard feelings. ❞

He was grinning as he stepped towards Thomas, a gentle arm tossed over the other's shoulder to steer him away from the small crowd on the ground, only releasing the poor man once they'd made it out of earshot and his own shoulders released some of their tension. ❝ Sorry for Tommy-ing you back there, man. I needed a get out card ; those kids were not letting me go. I owe you one. They're cool, but I can only talk about ducks and horses for so long before I start to lose my fucking mind. ❞

[seeinghcsts]

THIS WAS THE SHITTIEST MOMENT OF HIS LIFE . well , if the steering of one's mother to suicide on the train tracks didn't count as a ' shitty moment ' , , ,

thomas , realizing it would be more damaging to his ego ( one already well bruised for reasons outside of this little game ) to continue overreacting , tried to contain his embarrassment . harness it , reel it in , and shove it deep down into his booze filled gut to drown beneath waves of pale ale and accidentally inhaled glitter . the laughter didn't phase him — at least he tried to tell himself that — and he huffed like a scorned child as luke taunted him . a look to that barely contained grin on the man's face , its size restrained only by the will of glinting teeth . then , a roll of thomas's eyes as he heaved a defeated huff .

" yeah , sinclair . you get a gold fuckin' medal for bein' the worst kiss i've ever had . " thomas's words didn't carry that same lilt of humor that luke's voice had . instead , each syllable was tainted with a cruel , irritated bite . as if luke himself had willed the card itself to fall just to subject tom to torment . he really was no better than any of the pledges , just waiting any day now for luke to come to him demanding fraternity dues .

when the card was presented , thomas grit his teeth . the tapping of it to his nose felt like the equivalent of being shot - flaring his nostrils as if he were a bull about to charge .

then , with a scoff , thomas grants his friend a wide , almost shit-eating grin . though there is no sincerity in the expression , just irritancy . " note taken . " the man then throws his hands up in defeat , just nearly knocking the handsy girl beside him with his elbow . she leans in to whisper something in his ear , her breath warm against the back of his neck . giggles dance atop her words , making them even harder to hear over his thundering pulse , but he's already leaning his weight into one of his palms to push himself up and onto his feet - ignoring her completely .

" well , guess i'm out . " thomas then gave the card the man had flicked away an contemplative look , something teeming on suspicious in the gaze he then returned to the man still seated . he folded his arms , gesturing with his chin towards the shrinking circle of remaining players . " let's see those suck and blow skills of yours then . show the novice how its done , , , " a glint that was almost playful flashed in his eyes as thomas cocked his head . " — unless you got what you wanted and are tired of playing , that is . "

laughter danced in the air , the distinct rumble of luke's dry chuckle intermingling with it . his poor puppy was wrought with anxiety , whimpering and whining with his tail tucked between his legs . no , not a puppy . a mouse , led straight into a cheese trap . thomas's face was as red as the halved-heart printed across the spit slickened card , quivering lips barely clutching to its sticky surface whilst his neighbor's claws wound into the folds of exposed skin and faded denim . and , though the man was swift , his grace was gravely lacking . no sooner had thomas spun was the card leaping from his lips and fluttering to the dirty floor , weightless as a feather.

luke did not dive into the kiss . he did not inch forward , press harder , bite hungry fangs into the soft plush of the other's wet lips . he simply sat , expectantly , the kiss ending as unremarkably as it had begun . however , it was not the short embrace that sparked visible pleasure in luke . it was the rippling after effects . a palpable energy that pulsed beyond the confines of their game . a few pointing fingers , stray laughter , whispers , and a hundred leering eyes .

bottom lip rolling between his teeth , luke made little effort in biting back the smile writing itself into every inch of his face . " aw , you're gonna hurt my feelings , ortesky . am i that bad a kisser ? " still , humor permeated within the heightened pitch of his tone .

luke leaned back onto the balls of his hands , tilting his head onto his shoulder whilst the other unraveled . thomas went through the five stages of grief before he finally lifted the card between them , sat like a smoke within the slit of pointer and middle . its bent corner was tapped against the tip of thomas's cherry-red nose . then , luke carelessly flicked it away , grimacing at the tacky remnants that clung to the skin of his fingers .

" better luck next time . and , hey , word of advice : little more suck , little less blow . "

[seeinghcsts]

𝐭𝐚𝐬𝐤 𝟎𝟎𝟒: ᵖᵃˢˢʷᵒʳᵈˢ, ᵖˡᵉᵃˢᵉ!!

" LIZA , did you go through my phone ?? "  

      " not that i got anything to hide but , , , "

                " , , , , s e r i o u s l y , did you ?? "

[seeinghcsts]

AT THE SIMPLE DEMAND FOR MANNERS , all thomas could offer was a tilt of his head , followed by the lifting of brows , before his chin was swaying . left to right , side to side . a low laugh added sound to his otherwise silent dismissal of an offer he had made out of humor , followed by a scoff . he was approaching dangerous territory with churning waters ; the red flag billowing at the sea's edge translating to do not enter .

or , , , maybe that flag meant SWIM AT YOUR OWN RISK .

the empty beer is polished off , the can being crushed beneath his furled fingers as the pad of his free thumb swipes along his lower lip to collect any stale , watery ale that remained . " you're somethin' else , liza , " he mused , adding the ravaged container to the graveyard that had been erected on the cracked , kitchen counter ; splintered laminate with bubbles building beneath its uncleaned , poorly kept surface .

a look to his sister's best friend , followed by the limp shrug of a shoulder . he looks down at his fingers , rubbing thumb across calloused pads . like they were covered in dirt instead of glitter . " i think ko deserves better than just playin' house with me . " thomas believed kody deserved more than him entirely , but that same sheer stubbornness was why he still held on so tight . because he knew she'd dismiss that thought if he were to voice it .

sights lifted just in time to catch her gaze as it returned to his , eyes momentarily distracted from their silent search for something new to drink . he laughed , vision momentarily cutting out as he did ; the kitchen , the lowlight , and her arched form nothing more than a blur as he attempted to blink his eyes back into focus . " harder , " he echoed , humming contemplatively . thomas remained against the counter adjacent to the one she was lounging on , bringing one elbow to rest on it as his fingers mirrored her actions ; brushing the pad of his pinkie beneath his nostrils . there was a knowing glint in his eye as he lowered his voice ; " like i said . you're somethin' else . "

— THE DRUNKEN BUZZ OF his voice was lost to her , blended within the untamed dissonance that encased them . blaring music , faintly muffled by thin walls . the sharp ring of laughter & screams slithering in through an open window . red solo cups snapping under careless feet while glass bottles jostled atop the counter's growing landfill . eliza purposefully distracted herself with the subtle , tinkling tune of the party's soft minutiae ; the small details she always seemed to miss , too busy spinning through the nights' in a daze .

it was not until he leaned in — the lip of an empty can tapping her knee and drawing dulled attention back — did eliza's neck loll , turning a sage gaze back on him . then , a manicured nail was dragging across the marble counter , sliding up the can's smooth metal side & tap-tap-tapping against . for a moment , the only answer she gave was that empty echo .

" say ' please ' . "

however , eliza's kittenish simper , practically sewn to doll-like features , slowly unstitched . despite the haze , the blurred vignette accenting her peripheral , painted by a mixed cocktail of substances , a hum of consciousness remained . she was reminded who exactly stood beside her . and with that slow recognition , his question ( coated with a cruelness he could never understand ) held a bite . the sharp pinch of a needle .

eliza flinched . green eyes paired with a rosebud blush , and her pouty lips twisted as if brushed by something sour . melting off the counter , eliza — possessing a practice poise even with some handful of tequila shots tickling her nerves & blurring the scenery — glided with fluid grace toward the small island adjacent . leaning into it , curious fingers danced over the collection of bottles & cans with mild disinterest . " i'm sure s o m e o n e here would just looove to play house with you . " the words were drawled with slow , painful pointedness . " but i'm getting a little bored with the bottle service . think i might , " her spine arched , twisting to catch his gaze for a brief moment and flashing the mask of a smile . she tapped her nose . " try something harder . "

[seeinghcsts]

" PEBBLE IN THE , , , " thomas trailed , about to ask for clarification before realizing that milo would likely , purposefully , aim to leave him more confused . he never fuckin' understood anything the other said , so he found it pointless to inquire , heaving a sigh as he shook his head .

" — fuckin' hell , nevermind . "

dramatically , thomas's eyes rolled ( he really spent too much time with his sister and her ' bestie ' ) , a scoff sounding around his lime wedge as he pried it from his maw and threw it with far less care than milo into the nearby sink . " i don't wanna know . i don't wanna fuckin' know . really . please , for the love of GOD , keep that shit to yourself , okay ?? " standing up straight , thomas's eyes bleary eyes searched around for some unopened , unclaimed can to crack . " work shit , " he repeated beneath his breath , disbelief and something teeming on disgust filling his huffed response .

finding what he had been searching for , thomas scooped up the beer in an unsteady hand , fiddling with the tab , momentarily watching milo's hands in his peripheral . how the hell were they so steady ?? " both told me they were looking for you , " thomas retorted , clearly not thrilled to admit it . " kody's a big girl . a good one . plays relatively nice with others . but we'll both be lucky if cam doesn't end up in a cop car . " cracking open the beer , thomas shakes his head , muttering so only the two of them could hear lest one of the frat boys catch wind of his words ; " — i won't be surprised if she sends one of these guys home in a BODY BAG without one of us supervising her . "

their smile is positively impish as an exhale leaves tom, an exasperation they're confident only they can manage to pull out of him. they raise a brow at the answer, not calling bullshit but regarding the shot set down next to them. the temptation to take the cup into surprisingly manicured fingers and down it is strong, he claimed it wasn't for kody after all, but they resist. instead, they listen to the lengthy retort, eyes sparkling with either intoxication or humor. at least, it was lengthy for milo, who could hardly string together sentences that long. they stay quiet a beat after he's finished, too, eyes locked as they drink lime juice until titanium is pressed against bitter pith "that's noble, man. pebble in the water." they drop the peel into a forgotten solo cup.

"you shaming me, tom?" it's unmistakably a giggle, a soft, breathy laugh that doesn't reach the eyes. they take another lime into their hands, this time slowly and methodically prying flesh away from peel "work shit came up." the accusatory tone is thrown right back, as if they had any leg to stand on "where's ko right now? ..how 'bout cam??"

[seeinghcsts]

LUKES WARNING IS BRUSHED OF with a roll of his eyes and the trilling of his lips . pft — please , truly , how hard could it be ?? one thing thomas had learned about luke during what felt like a six month long ' friendship test ' was that he was a man who favored melodramatics . he reminded tom so much of eliza , it was a miracle he hadn't ever caught the blonde getting involved with the theatre department ( where he'd find a way to get his name to the top of every cast list , and tom and camille would both have to get an earful about it from eliza every . single . time . ) . the card started going around , and something in thomas's stomach coiled tight . a few close calls were enough to have his palms sweating , and when the ace card finally fell from between two participants — seeming almost purposeful on the male's end — thomas's jaw went slack in silent horror . the card being halved only worsened his distress , an iron rod speared down the length of his spine as he watched the smaller piece of laminated cardboard begin its second rotation .

oh shit .

he notably stiffened , leaning back into one of his hands to play it off , though it was something his companion must have taken note of as luke leaned in to whisper , breath hot and stained with booze as it fanned over thomas's suddenly clammy throat . " fuck off , man . " thomas attempted to jest , hitting the back of his hand into the man's chest as if he were a pesky fly . his gaze , however , drifted to the woman beside him , who was now much closer than she had been when she first sat down and looking at him with a wildly feral gleam in her eyes .

the card eventually reached her , and she leaned with both palms on her neighbor's knee as she received the spit-slicked card from their puckered lips . thomas swallowed as he watched . anticipated . her head seemed to be on an effortless , eager swivel as she spun around towards him . leaning in , she sank acrylic talons into his upper thighs and surged her weight forward . the nameless girl had practically hurled herself into his lap , smacking the card against his mouth ( more so his bottom lip ) . thomas screwed his eyes shut and sucked in as hard as he could to pull its halved body from her lips . distracted by the force of her frame atop him , he had entirely failed to notice her efforts to try and purposefully get the card to drop between them .

desperately eager to turn away from her , to twist his body so his shoulder would knock her off of him ; thomas never realized the card had been lost by the time he had fully turned his head . it was too late by the time he had noticed , mouth stamping against luke's with a such a force it was a miracle their noses didn't crunch together . he tasted peppermint and remnants of liquor . felt lips and teeth . tom's eyes snapped open , the man tearing himself back , an expression that could only be labeled as humiliation painting his face as heat crawled up his neck . the laughter swelled instantaneously , thunderous in his ears where blood was rushing , one giggle to his left particularly shrill as the handsy girl cackled and clapped her hands .

" FUCK - " thomas panted , gaze still zeroed in on luke before he ripped it away , looking around frantically . " where'd the - where'd the , " he licked his lips , brows creasing , breaths suddenly erratic . " where'd the fuckin' card go ?? i had the card !! i - i sucked on it , man !! no fuckin' way it fell . " maybe if he distracted himself with the searching for what to him was now public enemy number one , he'd be able to tune out the song of his own misfortune . to ignore the icy blue stare no doubt sewn to him .

a tongue rolled over rum-stained teeth , hiding the tickle of a humored smile . there was just something about thomas — his eagerness to please , his need to wear the skin of whoever he stood closest to , his innate ability to be anyone but himself . luke had clocked it immediately , mere minutes into their first conversation . for thomas , it must have been a god-sent miracle to be seated beside luke sinclair last semester . for luke , it was simply another moment . another face , another name , another game . the only difference this time was how long good ol' tom had managed to hang around.

an eyebrow arched in response . luke snorted , cornflower eyes rolling . " what —— are you guys ' open ' or something ? by all means , if you're searching for a third in our little pool of players , call her up . " each word was drenched in a thick layer of sarcasm which drowned the gravel of his voice . but , before thomas could have a chance to respond , or defend the sanctity of his relationship ( which , honestly , luke could have cared less about ) , the game had begun .

some guy wearing a rancid hue of yellow started them off . from his puckered lips , the ace was passed to lauryn mercer ( wasn't she fucking banned from alpha delta events ? luke would need to speak with reeve later about the integrity of their blacklist ) . she carried it to another fleeting acquaintance . and to another and another . around the circle they went . until it reached the sloppy kiss of jacob jones . the card fluttered away and , in the same second , jacob's wet lips were mashing into his neighbor's . fuck , he needed to be cut off . they were not having a repeat of the renegades party from last year .

after the jeering and laughter died down , the ace of spades was picked up and — as the rules went — split in half . one side was discarded , while the other remained in the game . suddenly , the stakes were raised and difficulty doubled .

" careful , " luke whispered , watching the halved card continue on its path toward them . closing in . " chick next to you tends to get handsy . hope you have strong lungs . "

[seeinghcsts]

" WHAT , PEOPLE BEING SURPRISED TO SEE YOU HERE ?? " he asked without thinking , words taking him by surprise as they resonated in his ears shortly after departing his slacked jaw . clearing his throat , a means of apologizing without actually having to own up to it , thomas leaned back against the house and tilted his face up to gaze at the inky black sky ; peppered with stars that winked as they caught his eye . he smiled , loose and unrestrained , as a laugh bubbled from grin-split lips . " well , whatever they fuckin' are , i think they're cool . "

he didn't know how to be , , , friendly . was he being too friendly ?? this was kody's roommate , his girlfriend's , , , friend . he'd could compliment her without being weird ( if only thomas ortesky was capable of doing anything without ' making it weird ' ) . " i'm glad you came . sure kody's thrilled . " the cigarette was almost forgotten until he felt the flame crawling up its slender , round body beginning to nip at his fingers . thomas quickly brought the filter back to his lips , adjusting his grasp so he didn't get burnt , eyes weighted as he closed them around it and drew in a deep breath . he feels isla lingering , her presence a weighted shadow in his peripheral , and he resisted the urge to turn to look at her ; opting to either stare at the back of his own eyelids or let his fleeting mind ( faded , induced , warped ) find aimable replies amongst constellations . " yeah , some party is definitely a way to put it . you havin' a good time ?? " he asked in earnest as he rolled his shoulders , an ache having already settled within the muscles encompassing their blades . his vertebrate gave a few noisy pops , and he sank a bit heavier against the siding .

he's then extending his hand , the one nursing the burning tabaco , to offer his smoke in isla's direction . thomas then finally turns to look at her once more , expression lingering somewhere between neutral and reluctant to find her eyes . " i , for one , don't think i'll ever be able to get rid of all this fuckin' glitter . i'll spend the rest of my life finding it all over me . "

barefoot in the grass,   isla walks like she’s forgotten what it feels like to stand.   she carries her heels in her hands,   the coolness of the ground pressing up into her,   but she doesn't feel it.   she’s not connected to anything except the idea of movement,   like if she keeps moving,   the buzz can’t catch up.   then there’s thomas,   standing against the house,   like he’s carved from the same shadows that stretch out from the porch light.   he’s not here for the party.   he’s not even here for himself.   he’s just here.

she doesn’t know him well,   just that he’s kody’s boyfriend,   and maybe that’s enough.   it could be better that way,   knowing nothing more of each other than the red string joining them.   still,   he looks different out here,   away from the chaos.   like he’s just watching,   or trying to distract himself from his hand in it.   " thomas, hi. "   as if he too had become subject of false expectation.   what was thomas doing out here all on his lonesome,   and more importantly  ..  was he wearing kody's top? she watches him react,   but there’s a beat,   a gap,   and for a moment they're just watching eachother. he's surprised.   " seems like that's become a theme tonight. "   tone prods flat but with a glint in her eye that suggested she was enjoying his discomfort just a little.   something more amicable piques from his roundabout compliment.   " thanks! they're—rosettes,   actually. "   she’s smiling,   but it’s a joke she’s telling herself,   a tiny thing,   something only for her.   that is the art of being,   and more importantly,   of conversation: entertaining the many nothings wedged between salient information.   she rubbernecks back to the mess of a house as they brace against its side,   watching people spill from an opening they can in drunken masses before flitting back to thomas.   " some party,   huh? "

[seeinghcsts]

AS ELIZA'S HAND ONCE MORE INVADED his personal space , swatting away at fiddling fingers as they toyed and manipulated the hem of kody's shirt , thomas jumped back as if her almond manicure carried an electrical current . " christ , alright !! fuckin' hell , " he grit , hands flying up with palms facing outwards . " no , i don't wanna ' ruin her vision ' . i'll stop touchin' it . " he bit back grumpily , a scorned child that had been caught doing something they shouldn't have been . the room ebbed and flowed , the drugs in his system making tile look like rolling waves , and he leaned his back against the counter to try and ground himself . he felt light , adrift in the open sea , , , if that sea happened to be made of perspiration slicked bodies of inebriated grad students . thomas rolled out his neck , releasing some tension that had crowded around his joints , before lulling his head to the side to look at eliza once more ; her face now shrouded in a pink hood , features tucked beneath hued shadow .

he smiled limply at her , lazily , submitting to the floaty feeling as he hummed in reply to her chastising . eliza's voice was like spider silk ; clinging to his skin , slipping beneath it , creating webs between his bones . it felt like each vibration caused by her speech was tickling him . " i'm not an artist , " he retorted with a theatric scoff , shaking his head . " — i'm a man who studies artists . i have a sketchbook but i'd hardly classify anything in there as art . it's , , , entirely different . " he thought he was making a point , a solid one at that , but the minute each syllable curled his tongue and each consonant sounded against his teeth ; any word thomas spoke had lost all meaning to him . fluent in a language he didn't understand . swelled pupils ventured once more across the kitchen , overwhelmed by the way it warped beyond recognition , gaze seeking out eliza's to ground him again as he inched closer , knocking his beer can against the cap of her bent knee . " bottle feed me beer ?? i mean SHIT , i dunno , " he replied , a playful song to his coo as he raised his brows at her , his smile spreading across drunk-flushed features ;

" are you offering ?? "

— IN PERFECT SYNC , SOFT hands flattened atop the counter & pushed her small frame up onto the smooth ( albeit , a tad sticky ) surface beside thomas's abandoned beer can . bare legs dangled over the side , manicured nails holding its dripping edges , while a crown of uncharacteristically wild curls tilted to the side . with it , the world began to spin on a topsy - turvy axis .

" kody has good taste , " she replied — spoken like a sure fact rather than soft assurance , quick to catch his subtle change in disposition . she had , after all , known him for nearly a decade . memorized the man's tick's , and learned to anticipate his tock's . swift as an arrow , her hand shot off its perch & swatted fiddling fingers away from the hem of his ( or , rather , kody's ? ) cropped tee . a chiding tongue clicked in warning . " stop stretching it m o o o r e ! don't want to ruin her ' vision ' , do you ? "

eliza's scolding touch retreated back to its place atop the counter , and , mindlessly , two fingers waltzed along ( what was once ) white marble , stepping out of beat with the music's muffled blare . when her gaze returned to his , two thin brows knit together , wrinkling at the center . thomas's stare bore a deep hole between her eyes , and eliza was almost certain he hadn't blinked in at least a full minute . w e i r d o . how high was he ?!

she scooped up the sheer fabric of the spindly pink scarf wrapped loosely around her neck , lifting the accessory over her head like a hood — & casting a shadow over the faint flush of roses budding atop her cheeks . all night she had been dancing , mingling , partying without worry . now , though , under the scrutinizing gaze of her best friend's big brother , she felt transparent . not like he hadn't seen her in worse before . between the pool parties at their childhood homes , and many oversized t-shirts she'd been forced to borrow in high school after an impromptu night out , this dress - up doll's bikini top & mini - skirt were nothin' . not like she c a r e d what HE thought about her fashion choices . prude .

" have camille & i seriously taught you nothing ? hmph , i fear you're a lost cause . clueless to T H E ' lisa frank ' . . . and here i thought you were supposed to be an ARTIST . " though her face had turned away , now surveying the revolving door of people with mild interest — their bodies becoming a blur of fluid movement — a dramatic sigh tumbled through crooked lips . " feeling okay ? memory failing . . . can't dress yourself without help . . . what's next , thomas — needing to be bottle fed beer ? "

[seeinghcsts]

a coy and mirthful grin ornamented thomas's lips as he laughed , head tilting back , the glitter streaked across his throat and down his chest glinting as it caught rays of spring sun . though , he snapped his head up at the moniker , a pointed finger being wielded like a dagger as he aimed it in his sister's direction . " hey . fuck off . " but his expression didn't contort to reflect any sort of malice . instead , hilarity danced in the pools of black tar that had become of his irises as his grin split so wide it ached .

he settled back in , resting his elbows on his knees , tapping the rim of his emptying beer can against his lower lip as he looked at camille through damp lashes . " you're ridiculous , you know that ?? " he mused after her tangent , a cock of his head , the knowing raise of his eye brow . " between the two of us , i think we've done enough drugs and ingested enough cheap alcohol to kill a fuckin' horse , , , and you're worried about my relationship with corporate america ?? are you implying i'm the only ' american idiot ' here ?? "

❝            oh, so only value a woman's input if she's pretty ? ❞  the accusation lacking all seriousness as camille shook their head.  ❝ that's fucked up, tommy. ❞ the nickname thrown in, annoying as any little sister would be. their good mood letting the conversation of ' why are you letting near strangers call you that ? ' for a later date. their stolen moments of joy deserved to go uninterrupted. camille was not naive to the fact they were few and far between.

camille's disgusting concoction of whatever had been left in almost finished bottles and just enough coke to be tolerable swished in the red solo cup as they tapped it against his drink.. ❝ wow, congrats ! ❞ sarcasm clear in her tone.  ❝ willing falling into the trap of a mindless societal pawn. have you never seen a sci-fi movie ? the microchips are always bad. you've just signed your lives away to corporate america. i think green day actually wrote a song about you. ❞

[seeinghcsts]

" i think most of my stickers have abandoned ship , too , " thomas observed , a glance down to ink-stained skin where the remainder of now-saturated emblems of colorful display clung onto peach fuzz with what remained of the tack glue on their undersides . he was kind of disappointed to see them gone ; the scrapbook she had made of his skin disintegrating and floating away . " we can replace 'em once we're out . the glitter , the stickers , " he trailed , brushing his thumb along her lower lip , gently tapping each tooth on its other side with the curve of his nail .

he leaned , after a delayed moment , into kody's hand as it came to cradle an absentmindedly ticking jaw . if it was clicking from the coke or the unaddressed anticipation for the worst , he wasn't sure , but her pruned finger tips buzzed with warmth and soothed his clammy cheek . distracted him , the prettiest boy . something in him coiled tight , an amber heat surging through his veins , one that was amplified when her mouth came to seal against his . thomas pushed the palm resting atop her velvet soft skin through slicked back locks , splayed fingers entangling water-logged strands around them as he hummed into the expression of affection . his tongue laced with lingering hallucinogens and cheap alcohol - inebriated tenderness and unspoken confession - traced the pillow of her lower lip before rows of pearl came to nip at it instead .

" you just weren't what ?? " he mused , drifting his impish smile to press a token of sentiment to the curvature of her jaw . his voice carried a teasing lilt , the whisper somehow finding volume amongst the unrestrained chaos that swelled around them . his grin was transversal across her features before it once more , returned to her mouth ; " — weren't playing fair ?? weren't wanting me to win ?? you were praying on my downfall , weren't you , kody suzuki-braun ?? "

"Oh my god...you're right! All our glitter is gone." Not all of it, absolutely not considering how much she'd doused them in, but enough to leave a thin layer over the chlorinated water which would be a problem for the water filter later. "What are you talking about?? We can both be pretty." In her mind, everything was pretty if you looked at it from the right angle. Beauty was all around them and that most certainly included Thomas. And, not to be shallow or anything, but if she hadn't found him at least a modicum of attractive...she had her doubts about whether or not they would be together. She was an aesthete, sue her!

There was a shift in his eyes, a familiar look she'd noticed over the past seven or so months that would come over him whenever he got self-conscious or anxious and she mirrored his move, hand resting against his cheek as her thumb brushed over his skin. "I'll tell you a million times how pretty you are; starting now. You're so pretty, you are the prettiest boy. You, Thomas, are so -" her words got cut off as he leaned in to press a kiss to her nose, smiled widening until he called her out. "Hey! I do...I just wasn't." She muttered, leaning in close to capture his lips with her own, arm tightening around him to hold her close.

[seeinghcsts]

MEETING LUKE SINCLAIR had been like seeing the lights of manhattan for the first time as a kid ; extravagant , enlivening . like the world was at his fingertips and all he had to do was stretch up his hand to press pointer and middle to the thrum of its pulse . thomas laughed , the sound thunderous and clumsy , spilling out of him like the water sloshing over a glass's edge ( or in their case , booze over that of a red plastic cup's ) as he was commanded down to the floor . ever obedient , more than willing to be a pawn in luke's game so long as he remained on the board : thomas complied - though with an unspoken protest that came in the form of wrinkling brows .

" her name is kody , " thomas reminded the man with a roll of his eyes and a shrug of his shoulder . " — and if anything , i think she'd be more upset with me for leaving her out . " a tentative sip of his beer as swelled pupils surveyed the blooming circle they were now a collective part of . his companion then bumped into him , taunting beneath liquor stained breath , and thomas cut his gaze sharply to luke , scoffing ; " i'm not nervous . " yet his eyes betrayed him , flickering between the forms of their company , finding cerulean mirrors once more before drifting somewhere past his shoulder , his skin suddenly feeling hot - sticky with pool water and perspiration . brooklyn stubbornness steered his engorged tongue ;

" how hard can it be to keep a fuckin' card up ?? "

CLOSED , @seeinghcsts .

" it's only a game , " luke snorted , shrugging nonchalantly as he took his place in the small circle before lithe fingers entrapped the other's glitter-caked wrist , dragging the poor soul down with him . " i think your little girlfriend will get over it . just —— keep your tongue in your mouth . "

thomas ortesky : his newest pet-project . or , well , maybe just pet . to those that knew the man well , luke had a habit of collecting lost misfits . toy soldiers for his army . devotees to follow his fickle gospel . ortesky wasn't the first , and he certainly would not be the last . but , for now at least , he was proving to be the most fun — and most pliable . no matter how high luke told the eager puppy to jump , he always did .

as the final bodies joined the fray , finishing off their game's sphere , luke nudged his shoulder against thomas's . " aw , don't look so nervous . i won't tattle on you . anyways , long as you can keep the card up , you've got nothing to worry about . "