screwbeinghuman

[screwbeinghuman]

Just gonna freak out rq

LOOK AT HIM!!!!!!

HE’S A STUPID IDIOT AND HE DRINKS THE STUPID FUCKING CHOCOLATE MILK CARTONS. GOD I LOVE HIM.

[screwbeinghuman]

The fact that Kenneth’s date of birth is canonically unknown makes me think he probably doesn’t have any legal documentation like a birth certificate. And because he’s a Phelps, clearly an important family line in Nockfell and the cult, and the Nockfell police already cover shit up all the time, AND he probably already had his role as cult leader planned out for him by his own parents, he could probably very easily get away with having no documents.

That got me thinking… If HE has no documentation, it’s just as likely that NONE of the Phelpses have them. Travis’ Date of birth is probably known because he has himself and some peers who know his birthday.

And if that’s the case, imagine how hellish it would be for Travis to try doing literally anything outside of Nockfell if he had gotten out. He has like, NO proof of his own existence. Plus, I headcanon that even though Kenneth could technically use his power to get Travis a driver’s license or a job of his own, Travis probably isn’t even allowed to have either of those because Kenneth wants control. He’d probably get away with going to college though, with his father’s help.

So, he has no documentation, no money of his own, no car or license, no job, and no way to get either of those on his own without having to go through a big hassle of legal circles, and Nockfell’s police would probably catch him and drag him back before he can even get out of state, bro is entirely screwed sideways if he wants to get out.

This little theory of mine has deeply upset me.

[screwbeinghuman]

DUDE LITERALLY, like bro has probably a fucking diocese and other bishops/priests under him too, he’s not… going to wear the clothes of a teenage girl.

I’m not gonna name names but some of y’all need to remember that Kenneth is a homophobic Archbishop.

Please… i BEG of you…. I can’t handle the twinky yassification… that man is STINKY..

[screwbeinghuman]

I’m not gonna name names but some of y’all need to remember that Kenneth is a homophobic Archbishop.

Please… i BEG of you…. I can’t handle the twinky yassification… that man is STINKY..

[screwbeinghuman]

I know the “haha Sal short Travis tall, Sal small shirt Travis big shirt” thing is pretty much just accepted as canon but HEAR ME OUT.

Travis is a string bean. A stickbug. Probably doesn’t weigh over 120 lbs even at his *nearly 6 foot height.

Sal is short but he’s also chunky, I compared their torso sizes and Sal could probably eat him.

So I propose: Travis is a dumb blond who assumes that being tall means being bigger, and he’s forced to borrow a sweater from Sal because his own shirt has blood stains in it. He expects it to be too small.

*edited cause his height was confirmed at 5’11”