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OOC

I hate goodbyes more than pretty much anything. That being said, you are very honestly the greatest writers and some of the best people I have ever met, so I definitely don't want to leave without saying how much I love you all for the thousandth time. Your writing has definitely changed mine for the better over the last nine months and made me much more comfortable with sharing my writing with other people. And besides the insanely good writing and roleplay, you guys have really helped prop me up while I have been struggling and I can't tell you how much I needed or appreciated that.

I want to make it very clear that I am not leaving because of anyone here, or because of the roleplay itself, because I have never felt more challenged and excited when writing before. Some things have come up in real life with my family and I am having trouble dealing with my anxiety issues, and I can't write like I want to right now because of it. My hope is that I will be able to keep in touch with you all, and I would love to come back to APV when things get better.

You can find my personal blog here and you may message me here or there for my Skype username if you do not already have it. I love you all and I'll miss you tons! <3 

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[He nearly took back his words when her expression fell apart, sensing he had crossed a line, but it wasn't like him to apologize and she had already answered him, anyway. He felt anger wash over him again, though directed at the Carrow boy now rather than the Order.]

If he did something to hurt you, Salazar, you just have to say the word Alecto...

Leave Me Alone || Open Chat

Wonderful I’ll look forward to seeing you then..

"Is there something on your mind, Alecto? Besides Azkaban"

[It was too unexpected for her to hold her face in a mask and a wave of heartbreak transfigured her expression as she looked away from him quickly.]

I’m so alone. I’m all alone. No one will ever���

Amycus and I are…not speaking. I don’t believe I’ll be speaking to him again. I…we… That’s all.

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How are you and your character similar? How are you different?

//I would like to think Rabastan and I are nothing alike, not even 1% alike, but we are. He is, after all, a good vent for crazy and I have enough of that to fit into his brain as well as mine. Haha.

Differences: Rabastan is a psychopath with no morals to speak of, no code to follow beside the scraps of manners instilled in him by his parents and Pureblood society, and no authority to respect besides the Dark Lord. He is a murderer and, on a few occasions, a rapist. He enjoys the pain of others. Besides those obvious differences, Rabastan has grown to embody characteristics that are the polar opposites of my own. Where I need control to keep together, Rabastan feeds off chaos. Where I am logical, Rabastan is incredibly emotional—even if he does not feel emotions as “normal” people do. I fight for equality, Rabastan for supremacy. Where I am extremely introverted, Rabastan is very extroverted. He is a showman in the most terrifying sort of way.

Similarities: I reflect some of the worst parts of myself in Rabastan, and that is where we are similar most of the time. I find myself looking down on my peers often, though I never vocalize that, and I channel that into Rabastan’s character in an extreme way. It makes him a good supremacist. But I also feed him my great insecurity, especially when it comes to Rodolphus. The mantra I live by is “fake it till you make it,” as awful as that is, and many of my social interactions and reactions are very much forced. I channel this into Rabastan in an extreme way as well, as he forces himself into a human suit in order to interact with others in a way that will save his own hide from the Dementors. Lastly, Rabastan and I both struggle to find coping mechanisms and end up venting in ways that damage ourselves--Rabastan has become a drug addict. I can thankfully say that's not how I cope!

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adaav:

Precognitive dreaming

Genesis.

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[He paused at her comment about having no one taking up her time, caught the pain in her eyes before she buried the look. He wondered what had happened, but he kept his mouth shut.] I suppose I will have to do that, then.  It is easy to forget you are still in school. But no one is better suited than you to be our eyes and ears there. Of course I will visit you...Is there something on your mind, Alecto? Besides Azkaban. [Well, he had tried not to say anything.]

Leave Me Alone || Open Chat

[We will make sure of it. Alecto tilted her head to the side. She would never be glad that any one of her friends had suffered through Azkaban, she would have only wished the place on her worst enemies, but it was…reassuring to have someone who… he said it for her. They understood one another.] 

You’ll have to come visit me then…in Hogsmeade since I’m to be back at school for a matter of months. It will be good to see you more…and it’s not as though I have anyone taking up all of my time at the moment. [She thought of her…of Amycus and a wounded expression flickered in her eyes for a moment before they hardened to blue chips of ice.] It’s refreshing to be able to say that. You will visit, won’t you?

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Rabastan caught her quizzical look following him as he folded his suit jacket over the back of the chair across from her and slid into it himself. A look of recognition flashed over his features then, picking up on the little pieces of her face that she shared with her son. A witch, indeed. "No, thank you, Mrs. Longbottom. I am a little embarrassed that I failed to recognize you before." Of course I've ended up sitting in a Muggle cafe across from the mother of an Auror. I've gotten good at this sort of thing recently. He hadn't quite decided yet whether that was lucky or not. "I am Rabastan Lestrange. It is a pleasure to meet you."

Turning when the waitress came back, he said, "I will have whatever the special is for the day and coffee for the lady and I." He couldn't help it if his eyes drifted to the table where the information intended for him was hidden, but the chance to speak with the woman was nearly as intriguing. "What brings you here this morning, may I ask?"

Crossing Circles || Rabastan & Augusta || Convo

Augusta did not frequent Muggle establishments often, but lately she had been eager for a reprieve from all the stress and anxiety the wizarding world was stirring up inside her. The only problem in surrounding herself with Muggles was the absence of magic, something she almost found herself forgetting when the poor waitress dropped her cup. She hadn’t been expecting to man who helped to speak with her, but when he did she stared for a moment, trying to place how she knew him.

She suddenly remembered her manners and realized she was ignoring his question. “Of course you may; thank you.” This young man was a wizard, she knew that much, but who he was still escaped her. He looked to be around Frank’s age and Augusta wondered if he wasn’t someone her son had known at school. Once he was seated she decided to introduce herself. “I’m Augusta Longbottom.” 

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Crossing Circles || Rabastan & Augusta || Convo

It was a brighter scene than Rabastan was used to as of late, and, getting his bearings, he couldn't decide whether that was a comfort or an abnormality that would eventually cause his skin to itch with the incongruity of it. Azkaban was a far cry from the sunny place. But the Muggle cafe had been his contact's choice, not his, and he could appreciate the logic behind it. The place wasn't Auror-bait, somewhere that such meetings were busted on a biweekly basis. And that just meant extra security for him. But he was still relieved when the man he knew to be a wizard stood up and left a table halfway down the strip of floor-to-ceiling windows, leaving his message concealed there.

But just as he began to toss his coat over the back of the chair, the waitress beside him fumbled a mug of coffee. His quick eyes caught the movement of the woman at the table as well, a twitch of her hand like she was used to reaching for something to stop a mess before it could be created when she wasn't in the middle of a Muggle establishment. Like she was reaching for a wand. "Allow me, please," he said quickly to the babbling girl bending to scoop up the shattered mug. She quieted, and stood red-faced until he had put as much of the porcelain on the tray as he could. Looking at the customer herself, he said, "Would you allow me to sit with you for lunch if I replace your drink?"

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Do you think you're a good person?

I do not try to be. Goodness is useless in this war.

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Who do you think is the most dangerous Death Eater (outside of Voldemort of course)

There is not a single one I consider the most dangerous. Rosier has cold hard strategy on his side, Alecto has her fury, my brother and Bellatrix their power and eccentricities. I could go on all day if you would like.

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You're so pretty

Thank you.