satanicspeaks

[satanicspeaks]

[satanicspeaks]

[satanicspeaks]

tumblr users on halloween

[satanicspeaks]

"You've posed a really strong hypothetical."

"That's what my mom was addicted to, by the way."

"Hypotheticals?"

"Hypotheticals."

"Wow. Yeah, in theory, they're very dangerous."

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why is computer fun and phone evil

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Fuuuck we left the back door open last night andthe whole kitchen got out

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sure, i'll drink the pink swirly potion that released a little heart shaped cloud when you uncorked it. what's the worst that could happen

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rb to take a bite out of prev. just one good solid bite. no holding back. full force.

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redraw of old minotaur drawing

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Shoutout to this customer at work who didn't know the difference between a bolt and a yard of fabric and put in an order for 8 bolts and then freaked out when it got here and said she didn't want it. we have enough burlap to clothe a small village because of you. What the fuck are we supposed to do with this. We could make individual sacks for every fucking potato in Idaho. We could supply table runners to every single rustic themed white lady pinterest wedding in the continental united states and still have enough to become a rice bag manufacturer. I hope you dream in burlap

[satanicspeaks]

i think i cracked the code on converting regular underwear into packing underwear:

easily

using only a pair of sacrificial underwear

looks good (inside and out!), AND

keeps ur packer firmly and comfortably in place

if there is interest I can be persuaded to share my secrets

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last night i woke up at like 3 am after dreaming of a cartoon villainess who was a 3 inch tall evil sorceress and frantically wrote her name down in my notes app terrified i wouldn’t remember what it was

[satanicspeaks]

Who else thinks sex is lowkey intimate

[satanicspeaks]

Boop PSA, for Mobile Users:

To Boop - either tap the boop button next to someone's name or go to their blog and tap the cat paw icon

To Super Boop - go to someone's blog and hold the cat paw icon until it spins once, then let go

To Evil Boop - go to someone's blog and hold the cat paw icon until it spins twice, then let go

Can't Boop - either you or the person you're trying to Boop hasn't opted in yet

To Opt In - go to your feed and you'll see the boop-o-meter and the option to opt in

I'll update this when I know how to get certain badges and such.

[satanicspeaks]

dude your cervix just fucking bit me