sapphademicblackgirl

[sapphademicblackgirl]

!!!

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[sapphademicblackgirl]

Studying with anxiety/depression

Today I wanted to share some tips on how to make studying easier despite mental illness. I chose to mention anxiety and depression specifically because it’s what I have experience with.

Give yourself time -I know this one is easier said than done, especially when your illness makes you procrastinate. But this will help you fight overwhelm so much I promise. Try to start doing things as soon as you can. Talk yourself into starting. Just starting, nothing more.

Divide tasks into smaller chunks -If you give yourself time, then you can work small piece by piece. Writing 10 page essay is overwhelming as hell but knowing you have to write a few words per day or just do research will help you dial the feelings down a bit.

Just start -Tell yourself you have to do this just for 5 minutes. Just 5 minutes. Nothing bad can happen to you in 5 minutes. This will get you started and once you’re in it and going, you should be able to continue for a lot longer.

Something is better than nothing -You might not be able to memorise all 20 pages or write the entire essay right now, but if you start and learn one page or write half a page, you’re already moving forward.

Done is what we’re going for -Just get it done. Not perfect, not even good. Just done. Because sometimes it’s the best thing you can do for yourself.

It’s never as important as it seems -Things always seem huge and scary but ultimately, it’s never that bad. Hell, if you really zoom out you’ll realise the most important thing is just staying alive and a bad grade isn’t going to kill you.

Priotitize -Sometimes you just won’t have the energy to do everything, so pick the most important ones and leave the rest. You might come back to it later, you might not.

Ask for help if you need it -Ask teachers, ask friends. Know you’re not alone.

Be kind to yourself -Do not beat yourself up over failing things or feeling like you’re not doing as well as others. Just realise that unlike healthy people, you’re dragging this huge boulder. Sometimes lighter, sometimes heavier, but it’s always an extra weight. And yet you’re running the same race and you’re surviving. You should be proud of yourself.

Relax properly -Make time for yourself. Do things that doesn’t involve mindless scrolling. Get all the rest you need.

I hope I helped and have an amazing weekend.

[sapphademicblackgirl]

same. 

... i cant believe im having a crush on my best friend and falling into that trope. brb as i go into complete denial and never talking about this ever again in my mind.

[sapphademicblackgirl]

i brush the soft part of my fingertips against your skin, brushing away the hair that had fallen in your face. You had fallen asleep on my arm as I was reading. “”you’re so beautiful, i murmur softly. your lips curl into a small smile, pulling me closer and kissing me on the cheek. I giggle softly, “you heard me?” I ask “mhm”, you hum groggily. “I love you, qt.” 

[sapphademicblackgirl]

I just want to be at an all girls boarding school in London, having a secret affair with a classmate who pins me up against the sink while I’m drying my hands, kissing me until I go numb.

[sapphademicblackgirl]

this is really cute, let's see some color next time :)

lgbt + period kisses

[sapphademicblackgirl]

if your first response after seeing outrage over a black person being shot by police is to bring up their past criminal record:

you’re a shitty person

[sapphademicblackgirl]

hell yeah dude!

if you’re a poc and into dark academia please i’m begging you repost this because i’d love to follow more of y’all

[sapphademicblackgirl]

I listen to rap music as a dark academic to scare the normies. 

Good luck excluding me from a seat at the table in your academia space. I’ve built my own chair, cleared a spot, and I will sit there. Whether you’re afraid of my blackness or not. 

I’ve seen far, far too much erasure of my beautiful, yet sad experience of being a black gay women in dark academia and I said fuck it, and decided that I will take up my own space by any means necessary. 

[sapphademicblackgirl]

Listening to classical music and reading Classics as a dark academic is cool, but imagine you're the only black person in your English class. You're reading poems from America's Civil Rights Movement. On the way to class you listen to NWA or Public Enemy, the music of the 80's that so brutally describes the the reality of being black in America. You listen to this music feel the ambient hum of the anger from your ancestors, to put you in their mindset of freedom and survival, for you are their wildest dreams.

[sapphademicblackgirl]

Let’s go on the rooftop to look at the stars, laying my head on your shoulder as we tell stories about our childhood. I’ll look at you and say no star in the sky could compare to your beauty.

[sapphademicblackgirl]

We to go to the library together, with linked pinkies, strolling in the Renaissance Literature section. I pick up a weathered book of Shakespearean Sonnets, thumbing through the yellowed pages and stopping on my favorite. I look up at her, occupied with another book, and read aloud: 

“Shall I compare thee to a summers day?/Thou art more lovely or more temperate: ...“

Giggling, she watches me read the sonnet to her aloud, my cheeks turning bright pink as I feel her gaze on me. 

On our way out of the library, we stop at the discarded book section. She playfully rolls her eyes as I pile my arms high with books. She drags me away from the area, pulling me into the rose garden. 

"Put them down," she whines.

I place the books on the ground carefully, giving her a questioning smile.

She curls her finger under my chin, inching her face closer to mine, and kisses me. She tastes like sunshine and hope. I hook my fingers through her belt loops, tugging her closer. 

Eventually, I pull away.

“Um,” I trail off.

"I loved your performance in there, qt."

[sapphademicblackgirl]

Two sapphics clearly interested in each other’s conversation: 

sapphic 1: hey qt

sapphic 2: hey gorgeous

sapphic 1: you’re the most beautiful person I’ve ever met

sapphic 2: you’re so powerful and special, I’m so happy we met, I love you.

...conversation continues...

sapphic 1; goodnight beautiful

sapphic 2: goodnight gorgeous

Both individually: yeah not sure if she likes me though

[sapphademicblackgirl]

“You have to go the way your blood beats. If you don’t live the only life you have, you won’t live some other life, you won’t live any life at all" 

~James Baldwin

[sapphademicblackgirl]

When I think about how the world might have looked with cottagecore or dark academia that's not rooted in Europeanness/ Whiteness, I get so sad about the beauty and lifestyle we all must have lost.

[sapphademicblackgirl]

fuck dark academia's longstanding exclusion of everything and everyone not white <3

[sapphademicblackgirl]

I wish dark academia included more black and brown literature and imagery... I’m noticing this slight erasure of POC experience. Yes, the classics are beautiful and highly revered, but literature is more than books written by the white race, it’s capsule into history and time. One has the opportunity to experience different cultures through literature and the academic community is missing out by solely reading literature from one group.