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As a licensed therapist, let me tell you that the most success I’ve found with patients is not being uwu soft happy thoughts guy, and instead being someone that validates all the rage, anger, frustration and sorrow they have. Curbing it with fake positivity is unhealthy and self-destructive. Express it. If you need to cry, you cry, if we need to rage, we rage, if you aren’t good with words, we can do something more physical; I bought cheap plates one time, for this 16 year old girl who just couldn’t communicate and convey properly, then we smashed them together whenever our slow conversation touched on the things that truly hurt her, the idea being that giving a physical component to speech could help her organize ideas better, and it worked.

And after we get all that rage out of you, after we validate and shape it into something that’s nothing to be ashamed of and that needn’t be kept in a little cloister until it blows you to kingdom come, then we talk about how beautiful shit can be once rage and frustration are things you can grab by the throat. Yeah it’s not going to solve everything because a lot of psychological issues are symptoms of a greater root problem, and a lot of times, you don’t have mental illness, you simply don’t have money, but with that wholly on the table? Yeah it becomes easier to navigate potential solutions and increase resilience.

But seriously, “fake it until you make it” has a lot of merits but there’s a big red line that says “FAKE HAPPINESS” that you shouldn’t cross. Can’t blame you if you do, because we are taught “negative” emotions exist (they don’t) and that we have to repress and never ‘fail’. Fuck up a lot, and learn from it, learn how to get angry in a way that helps you and doesn’t hurt others. Way more productive than thinking happy thoughts.

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Unbeknownst to many: last year, at the end of March, I went through a miscarriage, and it broke me in many ways. Some days you forget about it; forget that the possibility existed, and some days you remember, but the sun is shining so brightly, it obliterates the thought. But some days, some nights--like tonight, it's all too real, what could've been and what isn't. And you have to constantly remind yourself you got through it, so you can get through today, right? Or is the miscarriage just an excuse? Is it something to cling to, when you feel sad? Whatever it is, it hurts. It sucks to go through life, not really knowing who really cares and who doesn't. It sucks to have to constantly remind yourself that you are your own advocate, that you can do this, as everyday hinderances try to bring you down even more. It is what it is, as they say... right?

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via weheartit

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to love someone is firstly to confess: i'm prepared to be devastated by you.

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— unknown

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How we fight our monsters mustn't be to create new ones.

We must be better than them.

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its true that crying wont solve things but we dont cry to solve. we cry to release

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While I can't have you, I long for you. I am the kind of person who would miss a train or a plane to meet you for coffee. I'd take a taxi across town to see you for ten minutes. I'd wait outside all night if I thought you would open the door in the morning.

- Jeanette Winterson

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by Peter Przybille

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Intimacy is not just physical. To crave a persons presence and energy rather than just their body is the purest form of intimacy.

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“I no longer have the energy for meaningless friendships, forced interactions or unnecessary conversations.”

— Joquesse Eugenia

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