sagzwrld

[sagzwrld]

“Death must be so beautiful. To lie in the soft brown earth, with the grasses waving above one's head, and listen to silence. To have no yesterday, and no to-morrow. To forget time, to forget life, to be at peace.”

Oscar Wilde

I have nothing I want to say, or rather anything I want to say publicly. Just that I hope from my rotting body flowers shall grow and I am in them. Absorbed back into the earth that birthed me.

May 4, 2024

[sagzwrld]

“The happiness of your life depends upon the quality of your thoughts: therefore, guard accordingly, and take care that you entertain no notions unsuitable to virtue and reasonable nature.” (Marcus Aurelius)

I have been thinking a lot. Thinking brings me happiness. When you think you’re more cognizant of the world around you and you start to break out of the monotony it becomes easy to fall into. For me I feel like I get so lost and caught up in the study everyday, do homework, when I finish let my brain rot. Watch YouTube, play video games, watch Netflix, go on social media.

This way of living makes me feel like shit. No wonder. What is my quality of thought? Nothing. I have no thoughts because I’m too busy wasting my life on bullshit and not thinking, just getting sucked into the traps of modern life. Stepping away and reading the meditations of Marcus Aurelius, Utilitarianism by John Stuart Mill, and Fundamental Principles of the Metaphysics of Morals by Immanuel Kant is truly life changing. I’m not saying you need to study philosophy to have a good life but doing something that makes you think and improves your quality of thought is amazing.

I don’t want to be a piece of shit. I want to be happy. I want to do things. I want to think.

April 20, 2024

[sagzwrld]

I’ve been thinking a lot about space and the uncomprehendable size of it and the infinitely small likelihood to exist. And not just exist but exist at the same time as you. Over billions and billions of years i happen to be born a month away from you. I only had to exist a month on this world without you. Isn’t that beautiful. There has not been a single day, a single minute, a single second of your life that I haven’t been here on this earth with you. As soon as you came into existence I’ve been here. Waiting for you.

Im glad I didn’t have to wait long to share my existence with you.

“Between seas, galaxies, and moons I was lucky I stepped on the same land and I dreamed under the same stars as you”

~

I’ve been reflecting a lot on you and us. Maybe tomorrow I will be more selfish and write about myself.

Jan 22, 2024

[sagzwrld]

I love nature

She is so beautiful. Quiet. Peaceful.

You can stand still listen to wind carry conversations of the tress talking amongst each other of the little creature standing in their domain. Birds chirping, enjoying the serenity with you. The faint whispers of flowing water. The blood vessels of our mother. The life force from which we drink to sustain life. All around you tiny green moss carpeting the forest floor.

It truly is beautiful to just enjoy and listen and watch. Separating yourself from society and enjoying the serenity of being alive and present just spending time with nature and experiencing vibrant life all around you.

It must be sad to be a person living in a city. Surrounded by concrete. Walking in man made textiles from Vietnam or Bangladesh. Looking out your window at more concrete. The only light you see being LED.

It is so ugly. Loud. Chaotic.

I wonder if nature loves us back.

Jan 15, 2024

[sagzwrld]

“I saw that you were perfect, and so I loved you. Then I saw that you were not perfect and I loved you even more.” – Angelita Lim

I am clearly still thinking about my post from yesterday.

The words in this poetry are very relatable for most I assume. When meeting someone you love all you can think about is how perfect they are; the prettiest I have ever seen, we have so much in common, the way they sweep me off my feet. But as you get to truly know someone yo I find their flaws. But their flaws enrich your love for them. Who would want to live a person who is perfect when all the imperfections are what truly creates beauty.

Anyway, that’s all for now.

Jan 14, 2023

[sagzwrld]

I am in love with a woman. I love her dearly. She reminds me of misty mountain tops and her eyes of the glistening pristine water upon those mountain tops.

She makes me laugh like no one can. Even without trying and when I shouldn’t or when my laughter makes her angry with me. I can’t help but laugh and smile when I am with her. Her smile makes me smile, her eyes make me smile, her presence makes me smile. As I write this abstract I can’t help but smile. God how good it feels to be in love with someone and for them to love you back.

I would do anything for this girl. Things I would be ashamed of but if she asked she would receive.

She reminds me of the cosmos. So beautiful just like super novas and galaxies forming. Maybe she reminds me of these because my love for her is as vast as andromeda.

I want to do everything with her. Celebrate, suffer, experience, grow, live, and die.

This may not be poetry but no poem could suffice what this woman means to me.

Jan 13, 2024

[sagzwrld]

What is the most important thing in a man’s life. Most would agree with me in saying a wife is the most important thing for a man.

Many have different views on the role of a wife. Aristotle (Greek philosopher) believed women were naturally subordinate to men thus believed a wife should be a homemaker (kind of boring). Although, Plato (Greek philosopher) advocated for a more equal role of women with them educated and a involved with politics. Epicurus (Greek philosopher) thought that the importance of a wife was to provide companionship and friendship. Lastly, stoics tended to believed that the role of spouses was to support each other.

Today it seems that the sanctity of marriage is fading. You see much higher divorce rates and lack of commitment to marriage. Some don’t even believe in marriage because they prefer not to stay with one partner.

I tend to agree with Plato, Epicurus, and the stoics. I believe the role of a wife is to be your best friend, and your main support system. I do not care if a wife is a homemaker or bread winner. Your wife is there to support you through all your decisions and difficulties. Without a wife to support I can not comprehend how a man is supposed to feel fulfilled without the opportunity to share their life with with another person. Waking up to another person everyday and falling asleep with someone every night and having that one constant in your life seems so important in your life. With a life and universe so unpredictable it must come with a sense of relief to have one constant thing in your life.

I think a marriage should be a commitment you make for the rest of your life. It’s an important decision that should take tremendous thought. Through sickness and health you should always be there for your spouse. I only believe in closed marriages as marriage is a union of two people, two souls, before and after death.

These thoughts are my own way of pondering the philosophy of our infinite confusing universe and sharing my brain.

Sept 20, 2023

[sagzwrld]

A sick and twisted mind filled with, perversion, cruelty, sadism, and debauchery.

Gaius Julius Caesar Augustus Germanicus, better known as Caligula, was Rome’s third emperor. He is one of the most infamous and enigmatic figures in Roman history, known for his extreme cruelty, extravagance, and erratic behavior during his brief but tumultuous reign. However, his mental state deteriorated rapidly, and he soon exhibited signs of megalomania and sadism. He engaged in lavish spending, constructing grandiose buildings and hosting extravagant entertainments that drained the Roman treasury.

To understand how he became mentally unstable lies in his upbringing. After his father and brothers were murdered he was ordered to live with Tiberius (the emperor before Caligula). Tiberius lived in a lavish villa on the island of Capri where he engaged in large orgies and sentenced people to death by having them thrown off a cliff or publicly tortured, this must have been an extremely traumatic childhood for Caligula. Caligula grew to enjoy these executions and orgies truly corrupting his mind.

When Caligula first seized power he was beloved. He lowered taxes, he eased up on persecution, gave wealth to the people, and increased entertainment for the people by hosting more gladiator games and feasts. However, this quickly changed, it begun with Caligula falling very ill. The senators had prayed to Jupiter to take them in the place so that Caligula may live. Upon Caligula recovering he forced the senators to kill themselves to fulfill their prayers, this was just the beginning. Afterward he had married his sister, made his horse consul (just to insult the senators), and tortured subjects publicly.

After 4 years as emperor he was stabbed to death followed by his wife and baby daughter.

Although this post is mostly history there’s teachings I like to take away from it. It goes to show the importance of having a stable home for children and the effects that absolute power has on the human brain. It is quite fascinating really.

These thoughts are my own way of pondering the philosophy of our infinite confusing universe and sharing my brain.

Sept 19, 2023

[sagzwrld]

In such a vast tapestry of existence it makes sense to attempt to unravel the thread of the universe that is life, and like most humans I too contemplate the meaning of life.

Many philosophers have tried to tackle this topic. Epicurus (Greek philosopher) believed the ultimate goal was was happiness and tranquility. Stoics such as Epictetus (Greek philosopher) and Marcus Aurelius (Roman Emperor) believed the meaning of life lay in harmony with the natural order of the universe, which emphasizes the development of virtue, inner strength and wisdom. Socrates (my favourite philosopher, also Greek) believed in self examination and the pursuit of wisdom, as an unexamined life was one not worth living.

Today many still agree with the teachings of ancient philosophers. But many also believe in vastly different ideas such as devote yourself to god, make impact on others lives, live selflessly, do good in the world, to reproduce.

I think it’s meaningless. I think what I do today is meaningless, I think what I do tomorrow is meaningless, I think writing my thoughts online is meaningless, I think my entire life is meaningless. Why do I think this? Good question, (although the answer is meaningless ;) ) how long has the universe been around? only 13.7 billion years, if I live to 100 that will make my life 0.000000008% the age of the universe. What I do in my entire lifespan is a speck in this infinite and beautiful universe. All to be forgotten eventually, realistically in 1000 years there will be nothing left of my existence. I don’t mean this in any kind of negative way, I’m just being realistic.

So, what does this mean. What does a meaningless life mean. Corny answer, it means what you want it to mean since you’re the only one who can give it meaning. I believe your life should be motivated by self interest, now I don’t mean be a greedy piggy narcissist as who enjoys that. I think most people find value in relationships, and caring, and living by a set of values. To me this is the only possible meaning of life. Live your life for you and do what you believe is right regardless of what others think and try to let your short time in this infinite universe be something you are content, proud, and happy with when you pass.

These thoughts are my own way of pondering the philosophy of our infinite confusing universe and sharing my brain.

Sept 18, 2022

[sagzwrld]

I like to think about women.

In the sense that their history is absolutely fascinating, how can a group of ppl so sought after and so desired have such little power for the majority of history? The Trojan war for example was started when Paris, son of King Priam, stole Helen, the wife of King Menelaos. The lust and desire for a woman caused all of Greece to conquer Troy.

Even today a lot of men will drop to their knees and do anything for a woman just to be around her for the chance of a relationship. It makes you curious how they can be so powerful over a man yet are often victims of injustice and abuse.

I sometimes wonder if thinking they are victims of injustice is an incorrect way of looking at the topic. For example when you think of an emperor what do you picture. Someone who looks after a group, someone who’s ppl give them wealth, someone that has people carry out their commands. Sounds familiar no? In the nuclear family model a woman is the person who cares for and keeps a family operating, a man provides for his woman, a man works and builds and carry’s out (mostly) manual tasks for his family and woman.

Perhaps it is empowering for a woman to be in this model and external forces have told us what is right is wrong and we believe it because after all humans are meant to think collectively. Perhaps it is not and time for a change of the family model. In my opinion not every person is the same and craves the same desires so of course the family dynamic should not be the same for everyone.

These thoughts are my own way of pondering the philosophy of our infinite confusing universe and sharing my brain.

Sept 17, 2023