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almost finished with sunrise on the reaping and i am in fucking shambles

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just finished os, so can someone rec me a fun lil standalone book they like?? something FUN... romantic maybe... with some drama... something lighter than ry ripping my heart out hehe

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i remember laughing one time on the dash in a very unserious way about draco m*lfoy being turned into a ferret and someone in the rpc trying to cancel me for it and posting a series of posts about me right after

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random empyrean thought because i just finished.... y'all think that sloane could theoretically be the key to "curing" venin, if she was able to get close enough to touch them and then transfer the power back into the ground?

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okay but ridoc's signet is actually terrifying and is giving bloodbending

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kinda grateful that i dnf'd fw the first time so that at least 3 books are out already my first time reading and.... i haven't finished os yet so don't spoiler it if we get an answer to this, but in iron flame the second sgaeyl reacted aggressively to seeing brennan and violet was like hey stop!!!! that's my brother!!!! he was like yeah she knows, she just doesn't like me and never has..... um??? red flag, brennan = officially shady as hell

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piper halli/well loves dr pepper and so do i

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I wanted to be where nobody I knew could ever come.

Sylvia Plath, from ‘The Bell Jar’

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me: *is tiny*

me: (ง •̀_•́)ง

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@ FAITHFLED .  a  private and highly selective, independent 90’s based original character inspired by southern gothic themes & the horror genre with heavy musical influences .   21+ for dark , heavy , nsfw, & religious themes present .   explored  by   anna ,   27 ,    she/her.

CARRD † STUDY † REFLECTION † PINTEREST

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please like/reblog my post if you use.

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his heart contorts and resorts to acrobatics in his chest, pumping white hot adrenaline straight through him. he is at the mercy of her every touch, every word. unbeknownst to her, devilish thoughts tap him on the shoulder, try to break down his iron clad defenses of a heart ablaze. ( could you take it if she leaves you again? ) truthfully, he didn't know the answer. he didn't know if it'd finally break him. what he did know ─ it was unequivocally worth the risk.

even if she left him to drown, releasing his hand just before they jump off the cliff of the endless love he'd offer her, it would still be worth it. every shattered piece of his heart when he hit the ground would have been, for a little while, loved by the person whose very being lit a torch within him that made every moon in his sky brighter. long nights spent alone, chasing the distance headlights in the darkest parts of greenery, letting his mind wander ─ he'd look up and think of her. wherever she was, he always carried her with him.

and here she was now, close enough to feel her breathing. the way her eyes lock on him, baring her heart and promising him love every day as long as she lives?

he just knows she means it, and he let himself trust it.

jacob never realized the aching strain in his back until now. the effort to lean forward to feel her warmth, to meet her at her level. it's awkward, even when she rises as high as she can to meet him. he seriously must have grown another inch taller since last seeing her, already towering over her under normal circumstances. he almost wants to laugh at how ridiculous he must look. he gently and reluctantly moves his hands from her face, so carefully, so intricately, as if one wrong move could rob them of this. once he reaches her waist, he wraps his arms around her and delicately cages her against him, lifting her off of the ground with ease. “ damn, have you gotten shorter? ” a breathy laugh finally escapes his lips, and he lies his forehead firmly against hers. “ much better, i think. ” his voice is low, husky in its delivery. their hearts beating as one, all of his senses in overdrive. the pools of hypnotic and familiar brown holding his gaze, eyes that appear now as though they've always been just for him. “ you already know you don't have to beg, bells ─ ” he breathes out, holding her up with one arm and soothingly rubbing her back with the other. “ you don't even have to ask. chance is all yours. ”

he was hers.

his eyes flutter shut, anticipation enough for him to send both of them off balance, but he holds steady. a beacon of new beginnings, of promising safety. his lips lightly graze the softness of hers, and a beat passes that seems like a lifetime before he eagerly presses them firmly against hers. back home to him, they did their time.

bella  is  painfully  aware  that  the  urgency  of  the  situation  has  loosened  her  tongue,    that  maybe  she  wouldn’t  be  spilling  like  an  overflowing  sink  had  she  not  received  such  an  ominous  gift  this  morning.    in  her  own  sick  and  twisted  way,    she  was  thankful  for  it    –    not  death and battle  looming  like  a  dark  shadow,    but  for  the  aggressive  shove  in  his  direction.    she  needed  it,    she  just  wished  that  it  didn’t  have  to  come  with  impending  combat.    the  last  thing  she  wanted  was  to  put  the  packs    –    her  friends  –    in  danger.    if  she  thought  about  it  too  hard,    for too  long,    she’d  regret  ever  coming  here  in  the  first  place.    so,    she  doesn’t  think  about  that.  instead,    she  thinks  about  how  there  is  molten  chocolate  melted into  his  irises.    how  the  warm  kitchen  lighting sets his figure aglow, like an angel hovering before a rising sun.    she  thinks  about  the  way  she  can  feel  his  breath  upon  her  nose    –    how  he’s  basically  a  human  space  heater  and  she’s  always  so very  cold.    she  thinks  about  how  they’re  just  inches  away  from  crossing  a  line  drawn  in  sand  by  a  foolish  girl  bewitched  something  sinister beyond  her  wildest  comprehension.    oh,    how  she’s  desperately  trying  to  fill  it.    pleading  with  the  ocean  to  wash  it  away  for  good, once and for all.  she’s  holding  her  breath,    she  realizes  this  as  he  speaks    –    when  her  words  fail  to  exit  her  throat.    ❛  i  -  ❜    a  soft  nod.    ❛  i  mean  -    i  should  have.    you  shouldn’t  -    you  shouldn’t  give  me  another  one.  ❜    but  she  wants  him  to  so  fucking  bad.    ❛  i  had  my  chance  and  i  -  i    blew  it.  ❜    she’s  stuttering  under  the  spotlight  of  his  unwavering  eye  contact    –    heart  pounding  in  her  ears.    ❛  as  your  best  friend  i  would  tell  you  to  tell  me  to  fuck  off.  ❜    she  pushes  herself  up  on  her  toes,    forehead  pressed  against  his.    ❛  but,    as  a  girl  who  royally  fucked  up,    i’m  begging  you  to  give  me  just one more.  ❜

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plan b is only $8 on amazon right now if anyone needs the resource/knows someone who does before our rights are taken lmao!

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l'avoir est comme posséder les étoiles .    @bravelies​   &   @breedsmisery​ .    ♡

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he's underwater, sunlight beaming from the surface at daybreak in a blanket of warmth, despite the unknown vast sea. despite the monstrous truths of their lives, of her life. the dangers lurking and looming over them. everything is dark and distant, everything but bella. her words echoing, bouncing off of the walls of his mind. two halves of one, the truth meaning of going through hell and coming out on the other side how you were meant to. even if it seemed lost forever, engulfed in the treachery of a dark, unforeseen power he couldn't overcome. thought he never would. edward had taken bella away from him, accompanied with the torture of analyzing the what ifs, had her choice been truly and purely hers.

could it be him?

the home he finds in her eyes anchors him and brings him back to his body, senses rushing back. the rain beating into the roof, the aromas from the kitchen, bella's breathing, the warmth of her body so close to him that if he wanted to, he could close the distance and ─

he loves it when she rambles, and he'd fill his own silence with laughter if he could breathe. he can't help but worry about the timing, the overcasting shadow of dealing with the battle ahead, with what lies in store. the need to reassure bella that she'd live past tomorrow, that she didn't have to say all of this tonight. was it fair of him, to fully succumb to his emotions? then again, he started this conversation trying like hell not to. his heart thumps against his chest, threatening to escape like a caged bird desperate for flight.

what's that thing they say about hope?

he wants to express his unanimous acceptance to her terms. that yes, he wants to hear it every day. several times a day. but the words won't come. he swallows hard, gaze deepening and his breath catching. he leans in until his forehead is almost touching hers, a dam of emotions breaking wide open in front of her. his eyes convey an open book ─ vulnerability, risk, hopeful desire. he's stuck on one thing, one thing he desperately craves clarity for. enough so that he finally finds his voice, the words coming out in a whispered breath.

“  ─ lost your chance ? ”

his  very  presence  was  like  a  golden  dawn    –    a  sharp  contrast  to  the  twilight  she  had  allowed  herself  to  wallow  in;    cold  and  gloomy  in  shades  of  blue  and  gray.    with  him,    even  in  this  dreary  town,    she  felt  the  radiating  warmth  of  summer  sun.    a  beacon  of  of  optimism  that  illuminates  the  lives  of  those  around  him.    how  she  had  allowed  herself  to  become  so  engulfed  by  darkness,    she  would  never  understand.    the  light  at  the  end  of  the  tunnel,    the  suns  rays  that  she  had  missed  so  much,    the  feeling  of  safety  was  here  all  along.    waiting  for  her,    promising  to  be  there  when  she  was  ready.    eyes  roll  at  his  observation,    he  certainly  had  a  point  there.    even  if  the  chili  sucked    –    she’d  grin  and  bear  it.    there’s  a  weightless  feeling  in  her  stomach,    all  the  way  down  to  her  toes.    she  thinks  that  maybe  his  gentle caress  is  the  only  thing  keeping  her  upright,   the  only  thing  keeping  her  knees  from  giving  out from under her.    she  can’t  help  but  feel  bad    –    guilty.    like  she’s  leading  him  on.    but  how  could  she  be  leading  him  on  when  all  she  wants  is  him?    this  time,    she  knew.    he  was  it  for  her.    she’d  known  before  the  immortal  spell  that  had been placed upon her unsuspecting soul.    she  had  chosen  him  first    –    and  she  would  choose  him  again  and  again.    in  every  lifetime.    ❛  mmm - i  had  a  feeling.  ❜    bella  teases, heat rising in her cheeks,    eye  contact  unwavering.    she's forgotten about death looming over her, a predator stalking it's prey. his  confession  escaping  his  lips  and  slithering into  hers  through  sharp  inhale.    she  knows  how  he  means  it.    how  they’ve  always  loved  each  other.    but  there’s  more,    isn’t  there?    every  time  they’ve  said  it,    it’s  held  a  different  weight  to  it.    this  time,    it  feels  heavy    –    mountainous.    like  perhaps  her  love  hadn’t  been  lost  all  along,    perhaps  edward  hadn’t  stolen  it.    maybe  she  left  it  right  here.    within  him, for safe keeping.    subconsciously  knowing  that  she  would  come  back  for  it,    when  it  was  safe.      ❛  i  love  you.    i  always  have  and  i  always  will  and    –    it  feels  so  unfair  of  me  to  say  that.    like  i’ve  lost  my  chance.  ❜    she  can’t  help  but  ramble.      ❛  but  i  would  like  to  say  it  every  day.    for  as  long  as  i  live.  ❜    even if that time is limited. ❛  if  you’ll  let  me.  ❜

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“  well, believe it. i'm just done. ” she could make him believe it, her tongue always her most vicious weapon. push the limits of the truth beyond repair, and do what she does best. lie, like it's an olympic freaking sport. anticipation of regret lingers and forces her to hesitate, but she's no longer the girl he knew. she is a ghost, wandering and empty. “  it's not like i was the great love of your life, you met me on the side of the road. you can run along and pull the same white knight routine with anyone else. ”

❛  easier  for  me?    what  does  that    –    what  does  that  even  mean?  ❜    he’s  racking  his  brain  trying  to  figure  out  where  it  all  went  wrong.    ❛  come  on,    alison,    you've got  to  give  me  more  than  that.    you  can’t  expect  me  to  believe  that  you’re  just    –    done.  ❜

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“  we could ... ” she muses, head bobbing side to side as if debating something. but, of course, the thought's already at the forefront. “  or i could hex him for you? giant bats flying out of his nose for days. ”

it  may  or  may  not  help  anything,    but  it  does  get  a  smile  out  of  her.    ❛  and  do  what?    look  through  his  windows  like  some  deranged  weirdos?  ❜    eyes  roll but  she  still ponders  the  idea.  ❛  let’s  do  it.    ❜