rundownbluejeans

[rundownbluejeans]

WHEN IT DOESN'T HURT

[rundownbluejeans]

When I was a kid,

I drew two wings on a giant paper and cut them,

Just to ten minutes later my dad come and tear them apart.

You'll never learn how to fly, he'd yell at me,

While I was just staring at him with tears in my eyes.

I was a kid,

Of course I couldn't fly with paper wings,

I knew that.

But I wish he had just picked me up while I wore the wings and just pretended,

Maybe if he did,

Now I wouldn't be so afraid to try to fly on my own.

[rundownbluejeans]

bravá!!!

well done bro

Weight of moving on

In the quiet of the night, hearts whisper low, A tale of love, of letting go. People say, “Move on, find someone new,” But hearts aren’t clocks, they don’t tick on cue.

Forcing love is like a fragile glass, It shatters dreams, leaves scars that last. Two souls entwined in a forced embrace, Can only find sorrow in that hollow space.

Healing takes time, like a gentle rain, Washing away the deepest pain. To rush the heart is to miss the song, Of finding strength where we belong.

So let the heart mend at its own pace, In its own time, in its own space. For love that’s true will find its way, In the light of a new, unhurried day.

-Ayaan

[rundownbluejeans]

gulmohar

I love like the sky filling the space between the dry branches of the gulmohar tree

spilling red,yellow,oranges to the cracked concrete

with the flowers fallen on your hair

pollen dusting your watercolor cheeks

kissed with love by arriving spring

sheltered by the woody tree

-R.D.

[rundownbluejeans]

Teacher

When I was little I loved to read,

A home out of paper,

A printed paradise,

But with time the ink had faded,

And so had my spark,

Teachers that saw words as naught but curriculum,

Their indifference doused the flames,

All but one had stomped the embers,

Only she understood,

It was her inspiration that nursed the spark into a flame,

Her infectious love the kindling for mine,

I may never be able to repay her service,

But if I can do unto another as she did unto me,

Spread love like a most infectious disease,

Perhaps that would be alright,

Perhaps then we could all begin to heal.

[rundownbluejeans]

since forever?

I've loved you before you turned into poetry

I've loved you since the grass stained my bleached jeans

I've loved you since milk toothed days and musicals

I've loved you since you slipped your hand into mine during a festival

I've loved you since you offered to switch with your shoes

I've loved you since you carried bandaids for my awful boots

I love you cause you hold me like your own

It's something really,it makes me feel known

to feel your heartbeat on my chest

to feel your face in the crook of my neck

I hope you feel as incandescent as I do when I'm around you

warmth lights up my ribs with love's wool spinning from my fingers

bound to you by my affections that linger

-R.D.

[rundownbluejeans]

GUYS DONATE IF YOU CAN!!

TW PET ILLNESS.HELP ME RAISE $827.DON'T IGNORE PLEASE COME THROUGH AND SAVE MY CAT

This is my mom's 14-year-old cat "Sleepy" (and my daughter's best friend) My mom passed away on her birthday in 2021 from stage 5 cancer. I could tell you a million stories about how much this furbaby means to us and how much of a blessing she has been to our lives... but that's not as important as getting her help right now.

Just before Christmas my daughter was cuddling her and noticed a discharge was leaking from her nipples. I reached out to a friend who is knowledgeable about everything feline. She recommended we give her a warm shower and clean the area with soapy water and take a picture to send her. The picture made our hearts sink. Sleepy has always had a soft underbelly that droops a little when on all fours. We certainly never noticed anything before. The day after we took the picture she ulcerated (seen in the other pictures) I had sterile wound care supplies from when I took care of my mom, and my friend recommended a product sold at petsmart called silverhoney. I have been applying that and changing out her dressing every day. But it's not healing. I even tried to put a very small amount of triple antibiotic cream around (not on) the ulcerations but I'm not comfortable doing that again as there is too much negative information online about using it on cats. (despite what vets have recommended in the past) because of the infection its spread into her lungs. She's struggling to breathe and with antibiotics she only has days left.

I work a fulltime and a part time job just to keep a roof over our heads. I'm poorer now than when I was on SSI. If I could have afforded to take her to the vet when the first picture was taken, I would have! I feel absolutely horrible about not having any kind of savings for emergencies. I don't even make enough to save... I don't want her to get sepsis or gangrene or develop abcesses or watch her slowly die over an infection that needs antibiotics. I have a suspicion not a diagnosis, and I don't even have enough money to put her down if what's going on isn't treatable. I absolutely hate asking for help when I work this hard at 2 jobs with nothing to show for it but covering the basics. But I'm not asking for me, I'm asking for her. She needs to be seen. Any financial help is so so needed and greatly appreciated.

I have a PayPal. The estimate reflects the only vet in our tricity area that will take donations over the phone but they require the money upfront. I applied for care credit and was denied.

I didn't set up a gofundme as they take too much money out, and the payments take too long to come through. She needs to be seen asap.

SAVE THE LIFE OF MY SLEEPY CAT (P*PAL DONATION BUTTON)

I don't know what else to do. My heart is breaking. She's all I have left of my mom. She's my daughters best friend. God Bless anyone that can help. 🙏

[rundownbluejeans]

*releases pack of dads into home depot* go……be free

[rundownbluejeans]

mood

why must it always be 'peppering'. why can't i salt my lover with kisses. paprika my lover with kisses. 3 tablespoons chili powder 2 teaspoons ground cumin 1/2 teaspoons oregano my lover with kisses

[rundownbluejeans]

🌻show my friend some love

Heartbreak

Crying on the inside

Smiling on the out

My love was one-sided

But it was the most beautiful ride

I am holding myself together

Not knowing what I might do

Just say when I confessed

Your reply was not true

On that cursed day

You told me

You don’t feel the same way

My love still didn’t flee

I, I can’t let you go

When you said you didn’t need me close

But every time you looked into my eyes

I could see my future shinning so bright

I can’t move on still I wish the best for you

I pray

Whomever you be with

Will treat you like I would

-Ayaan

[rundownbluejeans]

an arsonist's suicide note

(T/W:mentions of s/a, pedophiles, bullying,fire,matches,god?)

unscrewed the cap of the cannister

poured it on the bed

locked the doors and windows of the apartment

me and my friends shared

it's not really poetic

but I love to see him squirm

his hands bound by my satin scarf

he's screaming but nobody's gonna hear

death is his fiance

I'll send him for an early visit

she must be waiting at the door

for the coward who couldn't keep to his business

you are a weak man

who fantasizes about barely legal women

you should've been studying for your entrances

instead of taking undue advantage of children

I was thirteen on a cycle, when I tripped and fell

you took me behind the garden wall

saying oh I know how to help

the night I reached home

I scrubbed your handprints from my face

I washed my mouth raw, wishing you'd go away

I begged god to take my misery away

all the girls at school heard what you had to say

the boys whisper oh I didn't think she was easy

truth be told I don't even know what that means

my best friend stopped talking to me, that cut deep

the next thing I know I was standing on the terrace

I screamed through the silent night

for heaven to take me in as a prisoner

the devil said make him suffer, make him pay

how much longer will he make your life a living hell

forgiveness is forgiven

when the perpetrator never intends to change

so I dropped the lit match and set fire to the rain

the angels will cry tears of blood and say

a savior has been brought into the skies

monoxide poisons my lungs

my haemoglobin dying

Now I'm so asphyxiated, I wanna go home

I wanna tell my mother about it, walk in her clothes

I wanna tell my father, that he's seriously the best dad I could ever have

I wanna tell my brother to remember me in his good memories and not be sad

And to my best friend, I hope you think of me the most

the moment I really needed you,

that's when you went ghost

I hope my sacrifice hasn't gone in vain

atleast my absence may have relieved many children of their pain

-R.D

[rundownbluejeans]

dirty dishes

you look like a god washing the dishes

unkempt hair worn in style

beads of sweat dripping down your forehead

you push your brow back with a smile

A month or two I can't remember

I told you the water's too cold for me

I hate the way my fingers prune

and how it reminds me of the sea

You simply sit and listen never lowering your gaze

hold my hand and say I get you

and I don't remember thinking much of it again

It's much past september, the rain is slowing down

I come home to drown my bones in slumber

drenched with heaven's tears

your hips against the counter, your silhouette on the kitchen wall

your hands clean the coffee stains in my favorite cup

you push your fingers in and don't miss a single spot

you trace your fingers around the rim and wash it all out

you notice me much after I notice the non chalance on your face

you kiss me on the forehead

you turned ceramic into gold,

a 21st century alchemist of sorts

a love that only I have known

-R.D