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people have said unalive in real life to my face. like we are reaching new levels of pandering to a group that is composed of people whose goal is to censor and make the real words that happen in real life sound like something unheard of or taboo. please just say death, kill, murder, rape. these absolutely real and horrible things have an affect on people in real life, so of course the words should convey that.

okay is youtube actually known to demonetize people for words like death and killing or are people so used to tiktok that they're applying the standards elsewhere? because i just had to stop watching a video essay when they said the word 'unalive' in reference to the fucking holocaust. modern internet is beyond parody sometimes.

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jokes to make after failure that aren’t self-deprecating:

I’m the best to ever do it

Nobody saw that (best if said loudly)

No one’s ever done it like me

I could be President/they should make me President

Behold, a mere fraction of my power!

The public wants to be me soooooo bad

I’m an expert in (thing you just failed at)

How could this have happened to god’s favorite princess?

Nothing ibuprofen and a glass of water cant fix

I’m being sabotaged

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edibles do not taste fucking good oh my god.

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"i dont listen to rap"

"the majority of rap is about violence/sex/wealth"

the rap experts of tumblr have spoken

fuck killing a victorian child by making them listen to hyperpop all you gotta do is make a white tumblr user listen to rap

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"holy shit they finally confessed, what comes next--"

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"Y/n threw her long blonde hair into a messy bun"

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When you've been a writer for long enough, commas become more of a spiritual practice than a grammatical one.

Could I explain the actual rules of how they’re used? Absolutely not.

Do I rely on sensing a tremor in the force to tell me where to use them? Yes and this has never failed me even once.

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the holy grail types of fanfic

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actually not sleeping barely eating doing drugs all day long and jacking off feels soo goood without a psychiatrist in ur ear telling you that ur bipolar

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If I search for one more “x reader” fanfic and get bombarded with fuckass OC characters im gonna have a hernia im so serious.

STOP PUTTING “X READER” HASHTAGS FOR A FIC THAT IS NOT X READER FUCKKK

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TRUST that i will be bouncing on it crazy style

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the joy of realizing someone is a similar type of freak as you