rorylane1201

[rorylane1201]

We went to see Santa today!

We have all been down BAD with a terrible cold/viral infection. So the last few days have been pretty rough for all of us. We had this Santa visit booked so long ago and it was the only visit we’d booked for you so if we didn’t go, you didn’t see Santa on your first Christmas!

We had booked the John Lewis in Oxford Street but we had decided to drive and park nearby, an absolute god send!

We got up, felt a bit better and off we went! We had a glorious day. You looked adorable in your crochet ‘Santa baby’ onesie with matching Santa hat.

You cried a little with Santa, but he was very lovely and we got the pics we needed. We then headed off for a spot of lunch at an Italian restaurant also in Oxford street. Everything was in walking distance which was so easy. We popped you in the travel pram and around London we went.

At the restaurant, you were in your element. We were sat right in the middle so your nosey little head could look in any direction and catch someone’s eye. You were waving, saying hi and bye and smiling at everyone, and they all adored you! We shared some burrata and garlic bread with you and you had some of your snacks. Then we headed home!

Christmas is filled with so much more magic now you’re here.

[rorylane1201]

So I think it’s about time we go through some of your stats.

Firstly, you sat up at five months. you crawled at seven months. Took your first steps at 10 months.

Your first word was ‘hi’ which was accompanied by a little wave. You used to love doing this in the supermarkets when you were in the trolley.

Your second word was ‘up’ which was accompanied by you putting your hands up and asking to be picked up.

Your third word was ‘wow’ this one used to come out a bit randomly you would kind of just say it whenever you felt like it.

You also started to point to things that you want the main one being the remote control you point to it if you want us to change the channel.

I’m still breastfeeding you’re 11 months and yesterday we went for our yearly checkup. The health visitor told us that you are advanced for your age. She said you’re on the 50th percentile for weight 50th percentile for head circumference and 75th percentile height

[rorylane1201]

We had a lovely day today!

First, we only had one wake up last night which was incredible. Going from 3-4wake ups back to 1 seemed like a dream. Let’s see what’s in store tonight.

Then, we went to Sam’s house to see Grace, Dora and Olivia. We were having breakfast, bacon sandwiches and hash browns. The meet time was 9:30am and I was worried as you were due a nap then. I popped you in the car at 9 and drove around and you went down for a nap about 20 mins later! I ended up being 20 mins late but it was no bother and you’d had your short morning nap!

I’m trying to give you a short morning nap and then a longer afternoon nap in your cot. It seems to be working well sleep wise but it also gives me a little freedom. Your first nap I can be out and about and the second nap I’m home and you’re in your cot.

We had a lovely time at Sam’s house. It really gave me the feeling that these are some of the best days of our lives. Going round my friends house with my baby and them having their babies and us all getting on and discussing new motherhood is a dream come true. I’m so lucky to have it.

We left Sam’s house at about 1pm. You were due a nap but I wanted to get you home and try to get some lunch in you before putting you down. I can’t believe it but I managed just that! With a lot of help from your Dad I got you home, fed, while we also ate our lunch, then breast fed and down for an afternoon nap in your cot.

Whilst you were down i rang the doctors as your eczema has become quite bad on your face. I asked for an appointment next week and they said I could come in today. I had some bits I needed to do in Katherine Place so thought why not! You had an hour and a half nap in your cot, I got you up, fed you, changed you and walked over to the doctors. We had a little wait for our appointment which was a bit annoying but we got what we needed, some new cream for your face. I then managed to go to Tescos and get a dessert, send a parcel, pick up your prescription, get a little battered sausage for me and your dad as a treat and post a letter before coming home.

I then made us all chicken gyros for dinner which you kind of enjoyed? Your eating is better but still not the best. Hopefully it’ll improve.

We’ve now just put you down to bed and you’ve gone down with no resistance at all. What a day. Ten out of ten.

[rorylane1201]

You were an absolute delight today. Firstly, you had us up 3 times during the night (normal 🫠) but you went back down after your 6am wake up until 7:50!! Unheard of.

We then had Gymboree so I had to pop you in the car and drive around to give you a nap before that. Another drive to Leverstock Green! Then onto Watford for our class. You’ve outgrown your class 🥲 I’m proud but also sad! I liked that little class. Next week we’re going to another class which is for walkers (!!) and an hour earlier than our usual class.

You ate three full meals and basically finished them today! You had your porridge, ate the entire thing. Then for lunch you had veggie waffles, mozzerella and cucumber, left a bit of the cucumber but ate all the rest! Dinner was veggie pasta, avocado and cream and a bit of chorizo. You are all the pasta and avocado but didn’t have the chorizo, I think it was more of a texture thing. Then you had some natural yogurt. Easily, the most you have ever eaten.

You had an excellent afternoon nap, where I was able to sit down and watch some Charmed with a cup of tea and a biscuit. Absolute bliss.

I’m curious to see how you eating more affects your sleep, but I’m not holding out hope for too much! We’ve tried everything and it never seems to improve your sleep much, so it is what it is.

A lovely day with you, where you were an absolute joy as usual.

[rorylane1201]

Gosh it’s been a while! Truth be told I haven’t come on here as we’ve been through a very tough patch recently!

Your nighttime sleep became awful. Not wanting to go down, having to be fed or rocked to sleep. Waking up every hour, sometimes 45 mins. We were dying!

Your naps had also become terrible, completely refusing to nap in the cot. The only way to get you to nap was a contact nap or driving around. I now have a new route to Leverstock Green and back which gets you to sleep as it’s fairly straight!

You’re still cruising. You are standing more independently each day, but you seem somewhat nervous about it so hold on for more of reassurance than necessity. I am sure you will be walking very very soon.

The kitchen and utility room is finished! We finally have a working house and it has made life so much easier.

Today, your Dad is in the office all day so it’s just me and you. We had a terrible night but your Dad let me sleep until 8am and did breakfast etc with you. So it’s just me and you today! We don’t have anything planned and I’m kind of enjoying that? We might pop to Nanny’s, we might go shopping, we can do whatever we want. That is the magic of maternity leave.

Speaking of, I am becoming increasingly aware maternity leave is coming to an end soon and my heart could literally shatter into pieces. Yesterday, was the 3 month countdown mark to the day I go back. I don’t want to go back, I love being off with you. I keep having flash backs of times during this year and I just want to go back to those times and do it all again. The late winter walks around the park with you when you were tiny and in your bassinet. The summer, walking in the sunshine and popping to the corner shops, having ‘nappy only’ days as it was so warm. Waking up, looking at you and saying ‘another day of just you and me’ knowing I had months ahead of me to soak you up. Each moment feels so precious now.

I keep telling myself work will be good for me, and nursery will be good for you. I do truly believe that. Plus, it’ll be so nice to not have to worry about money again. It’ll be nice to enjoy the weekends without feeling guilty we’re spending money. Good things will come from the end of maternity leave, but days like today, where it’s just you, me and time to waste. I’m not sure they’ll ever come back.

[rorylane1201]

It’s been a while.

Everything’s been go go go recently!

You are now crawling! You’re also standing up lots, pulling yourself up on furniture every day. Yesterday, we even got you cruising along the side of the sofa. Walking feels imminent!

I’m sitting in the car currently, as you nap in the back. Sleep is still a struggle, naps are sometimes contact naps as you refuse to go down on your cot, and at times a car nap is the easiest way to get you to sleep. The amount of petrol we’ve used to get you to sleep could keep me up at night - pun intended.

Nightime sleep is still not great, you’re now starting to wake up twice instead of once. Sometimes you go down fine and sometimes you don’t. It’s very hit and miss, as is the amount of time you stay down for, and the time you wake is up in the morning. Me and your Dad have given up now and we just take it as it comes. If you sleep, great, if you don’t, it is what it is. We’re too tired to keep trying these different tactics to get you to sleep more, as they never work!

You’re a delight though. If I had a pound for every time someone says ‘such a happy baby’ I wouldn’t have to return to work. Our family, friends and strangers all have the same thing to say about you. You’re a happy baby. You make us so happy. Your little personality is starting to come through and you are a funny little fella. You make me laugh so much!

I wish I could continue but I need to get you up from your nap or you won’t sleep tonight!

[rorylane1201]

We’ve had a wonderful few days.

Yesterday, I was kind of at a loss of things to do. Nanny and Grandad are in Spain, and I usually go to theirs when I have little to do. We have caught the back end of a hurricane so the weather was horrific, therefore cancelling out any plans to go to the park.

I’d done all the shopping I needed to do, and just wanted to do something else. After putting a post on peanut, someone suggested baby cinema club. I pondered it, then decided against it, then after a short conversation with your Dad I went ahead with it and booked a ticket! I then looked out the window on this grey, miserable day and was overcome by nerves.

The timings worked out quite well, you were due your nap at the time I needed to leave. I left a little earlier than necessary and you had a small 40 minute nap in the car. I managed to get a parking spot right outside to my delight and I nervously headed in with you.

I had the best time. The cinema is set up with little sofas and I had my own one with you. I had a little tray where they popped my free coffee and cake (a flat white and a brownie) and settled in for the film.

I was so proud of myself as everything I brought with me I needed to use, and I had all I needed. I played with you during the trailers, keeping you entertained. I then put a little blanket down and popped you on the floor to play. Then got you back up and you fell asleep on me! It was a beautiful moment. I sat you on my lap facing me, you cuddled into my chest and fell asleep. It was such a comfortable position and I soaked up every moment. I got a good 50mins of pure film watching, although I spent most of it cuddling you. I teared up a few times as I was just so happy. You then woke up and I fed you, I was that comfortable in the cinema to breast feed you, I couldn’t believe it! Then we watched the rest of the film ‘together’ with you sat on the sofa next to me. You then did a poo so I had to go change you, which was a shame as I missed a bit of the film but I didn’t mind!

When I left I just felt so proud of myself. So proud of doing something on my own, that I’d never done before. It was late and I’d had no lunch, so I drove home and stopped at wagamamas with you. I ate a katsu curry while you played in your high chair and I remember feeling this sense of freedom. All day, we were fine. We were great! I’d been out all day and I was coming home with you rested, fed, and changed. What an accomplishment.

[rorylane1201]

Today you were christened!

It was a beautiful day, and everything went perfectly! You woke us up at 5:20am, which I must admit didn’t feel good. However, it worked well as you were then due a nap and could get a good hour in your cot before the service.

We got to the church a few minutes late, again not perfect but not terrible. We sat down, surrounded by all your loved ones and the service began. My darling, you were a delight. You were so well behaved. You smiled at the reverend. You didn’t cry when they put oil or water on your head. The reverend even remarked about how you smiled when he put a cross of oil on your head! I haven’t been to many christenings, but I am guessing this is rare.

Everyone remarked on how well behaved you were, how happy you are and what a lovely baby you are. We were so very proud of you.

We had half an hour to kill between the service and the booking at the pub, so we drove you around and you had a 30 min nap which worked perfectly to get you ready for the pub. Something I had worried about in the days leading up to the event!

We then went to the pub with all your godparents, your grandparents and Julie and James. You were passed around and celebrated and so very, very loved.

We came home, spent some time together as a family and have just popped you back into bed. You have made us so very happy my darling. You are so loved.

Your Dad and I skipped lunch at the pub as so much was going on we just didn’t get a chance. We ended up having a McDonald’s at gone 3pm so didn’t want dinner. Now you’re in bed we’re eating a massive packet of crisps each and finishing off your cake! Very grown up parents.

[rorylane1201]

I love you, baby.

Things are getting so good with you. Your sleep has improved massively. We’ve had 4 good nights so far and we’ve actually managed to have good sleep! Summertime is finally here and the sun is shining. Whilst this does make things slightly more difficult with keeping you cool, having an actual summer during my maternity leave has been great.

I’ve spent time working on your room, I used my birthday money to buy a lovely nursing chair with a footstool. I love feeding you in it and in your room. Your Dad reads you stories before bed in the chair and today you napped on me in the chair!

Contact naps are becoming less and less, and whilst this does make me a little sad, I am so happy you are more settled and you love your cot so much. It seems to be your favourite place to sleep which makes me so happy. It means we chose a good cot and it also means you’re home.

Sleep training is finally paying off, bedtime tonight took 45 mins which is so rare. Me and your Dad get our evenings together. It’s slowly starting to feel like a more normal life.

Weaning is still a challenge. You’re not massively into it still, but we persist. You just don’t seem to enjoy any of it. You eat it but I don’t think you’re enjoying it. I know they say food before one is just for fun, but I don’t think you’re eating enough at all! Hopefully one day it’ll just click and you will start to enjoy your food more. We shall see.

I am becoming more and more aware that maternity leave is such a short amount of time. We’re halfway through and I am trying to make the most of every single day. Sometimes I get overwhelmed by panic, thinking about the last day of maternity leave. How it’ll feel, when will I do certain things for the last time. I’m also taking moments to enjoy the slowness of maternity. The strolling around shops with you, with no where to be and no one to see. Going for walks with you, the length of which doesn’t matter. Waking up every day, knowing I get to spend it all with you. Going to bed every night, knowing tomorrow I get to spend it all with you.

I love you so much my darling. I am so proud of you and I could burst with joy every single day I get to be your mum.

[rorylane1201]

Last night went well!

You slept for 6hrs to begin with. Going down at 7:30pm. We had to do a few pop ins but we got there in the end. You woke and stirred an hour and a bit into your sleep, but you then put yourself back to sleep and went down for a while!

We then did the middle of the night feed, put you down and you went down for about 3hrs. You got us up at 5:30am which wasn’t ideal, but I got you to sleep on me for an extra hour whilst your Dad slept and then he took you downstairs and I got an extra hour.

Me and your Dad didn’t sleep very well at all, but I’m hoping tonight we will be better as we’ve done the first night now.

I was an emotional mess last night. I knew deep down that you going into your own room was the best thing for you, but I was so sad about it. I was so sad that those days are behind us now. I am excited for the little bit of extra freedom that you being in your room and with an earlier bedtime brings, but I’m so sad that those newborn days are long gone. You’re growing up so quickly! It’s incredible but also so heartbreaking.

[rorylane1201]

We had a good day yesterday. You went down for your naps quite easily and you slept for a good amount of time for them! I felt like I was finally getting in my groove, I was productive, but I also had chill time to relax.

Then, when nighttime came, you would not go to sleep. You screamed and screamed and seemed so uncomfortable. We came to the conclusion that you had outgrown your next to me and should probably be in your big cot now. You wanted to turn over in your next to me but couldn’t because it was too small.

We moved you to your own room and you fell asleep in your cot. I then decided to sleep on the futon in there with you. I went to bed hopeful that this might be the change we need to finally get you sleeping well.

I was wrong.

You woke up 2hrs and 45mins later crying. I got you up, went next door and fed you. We settled you down and you went back to sleep.

A few hours later you woke up and you had been sick all over your bed. I had to pick you up, your Dad dressed you, we fed you again and then put you down.

You then woke up again at 6:30am and slept on me for an hour. Then you went downstairs with your Dad whilst I got an extra hour in bed.

Then, your naps fell apart. You needed a few check ins and they were both really short, back to square one! I surrendered and gave you a long contact nap. To be honest, I was so exhausted I was happy to relax whilst you slept on me.

We’ve put you down a lot earlier tonight in your cot again. I’m debating whether to sleep in the room with you or whether to sleep in our room and see if that makes a difference.

Every single step of parenting is heartbreaking. It’s all hard, it’s all amazing, and it’s all heartbreaking. I’m so happy you’re growing and we’re getting more independence, then I’m completely crushed that those days are over and we’re moving onto another phase of our lives, knowing we will never go back to those days.

I love you so much, baby boy.

[rorylane1201]

It’s been a strange few days with you. Your sleep got to such a bad point both me and your Dad were at breaking point. You just were not sleeping!

We were living off 5hrs a night in 3 separate blocks. You were living off 8hrs all day which isn’t enough for you.

Friday was the worst, I spent 2hrs trying to get you to nap. You were hysterical, I was hysterical. Your Dad was on a visit in Cambridge seeing a client and had me on the phone crying.

Friday I went to a work event, so Nanny and Grandad looked after you. Me and your Dad then went to their house for dinner. You didn’t really sleep with them either so we knew we were in for a rough night. We got you home later than usual, bathed you later than usual, and put you to bed later than usual and you still got us up at 5:30am.

Luckily, even though it’s July, the weather was a constant downpour on Saturday and so we had agreed to spend the entire day training you to skew in your cot in your own room, independently. You did very well, with a sleep of over an hour at one point!

Then, that evening, you slept for 7hrs straight. Waking for a feed and then falling asleep for nearly 3hrs, giving us a wake up of 7am. Which was delightful. Your Dad and I still felt exhausted though which was very funny. Again, the weather was awful so we again decided to dedicate the day to getting you asleep in your cot by yourself. We’ve completed another successful day and you’ve done so well today. We’ve just put you to bed independently once again and down you have gone. We shall see what the night has in store!

[rorylane1201]

Gosh, time does really get away from me!

So much to discuss.

Firstly, your Dad is on annual leave so we’re having a wonderful time. We’ve done very mundane things but enjoyed them immensely. Today, we went shopping and your dad bought a hat, I bought some glasses for my new matcha latte obsession, and we bought you a shirt for your christening. I can’t begin to tell you how happy it makes me when your Dad is off work. It’s so enjoyable!

In other news, we’ve started sleep training you. It’s been a difficult decision to make and initially I was so against it. But, baby boy, your sleep was just getting worse and worse! We were so sleep deprived, dangerously so, and you were so grouchy most days! We weren’t enjoying you or being the best parents we can be as we had no energy. I spent most days trying to avoid putting any effort into you as I simply had none to give.

It’s been a bumpy ride, with you still not doing amazingly well with naps, and we had one night where you screamed for an hour and a half, but so far, it’s been one of the best choices we’ve made for you. Tonight, you went down within minutes. After simply being put down in your bed. It means me and your dad get our evenings back. We bath you, feed you, put you into bed and then you fall asleep. There has been some crying, but I feel like every night you’re progressing more and more. Sleeping longer stretches too. It’s given us our energy back, and I am so happy for it.

[rorylane1201]

To be honest, I have no idea where today has gone! I planned on doing a big shop in Aldi today, when we wrote down the list I realised just how big the shop was and I thought I definitely cannot do that by myself in one go. I spent the morning trying to get you to sleep in your cot which failed, as is the way recently.

I then went to the brow to drop off 4 Vinted parcels. You started to fall asleep as soon as I got to the house so I extended the walk to the park. Whilst in the park, I saw your future nursery walking the children around the park. I cannot explain to you how happy I am with the nursery we have picked with you. It breaks my heart the thought of not being with you every day, but I am so happy with what we have chosen for you, it makes it just a little bit easier.

We sent out the invites for your Christening today, and I am so excited for it.

Then in the afternoon, you rolled back to front!! You’re growing so quickly it’s incredible. I got it on camera also which I’m very happy about. I then was going to feed you and take you to Aldi, but you’ve fall asleep on my lap and have been asleep for nearly 2hrs 😅

I fell asleep also! I think I had about 45mins of nap, I woke up when your Dad came downstairs to go out on a visit. He left me with some hummus and tortilla chips whilst you still napped on me.

Speaking of your Dad, he got his contract for his new job through. He’ll be starting in October so another big change for us. I’m so proud of him and all he does for us.

[rorylane1201]

We had such a productive day today!

Today was a good day.

It started with a sunny morning in the kitchen making breakfast and getting things done. I washed all your bottles and made myself the best matcha latte. You’re not enjoying your high chair at the moment which is really concerning. I hope once we give you food you will become more comfortable.

Then I fed you in the living room and you had a 30min contact nap. Once you woke up, I went for a shower and brought you with me. Then we went into your room and I started changing our wardrobes over from winter to summer. It was a much bigger job than I had anticipated and took all day! I still haven’t finished. You did get grouchy a few times and we had to stop for feeding and nap breaks. You had 3 contact naps today! Not great, but I’m losing the will to live with attempting to put you down in your cot as it ends up ruining my whole day.

We then cooked a nice dinner and had some chill time where you finally went under your mat!

We’re currently in the middle of bedtime and it’s proving very difficult. You seem to have entered this weird stage where you don’t seem to settle before bed at all. It’s taking hours to get you to go down and it is literally killing me.

[rorylane1201]

We gave you to Nanny and Grandad yesterday so we could go to a wedding.

It was so nerve wrecking. I hated the idea and actually didn’t want to go. But I’m so glad I did!

Me and your Dad had so much fun, we were back to being ourselves, life before you, but not quite. We had all our friends who had also left their babies for the day and we were all discussing the check ins, showing each other the pictures we were being sent from whoever was looking after them.

We just let our hair down and enjoyed ourselves. Other than the joy of you, this year has been so stressful. The house, your various health concerns, navigating parenthood, having no money. It’s been a lot. So it was nice to have a little evening to enjoy ourselves.

Nanny and Grandad also loved having you - although I think you gave them a hard time! You didn’t really nap when you were with them, and they really really tried to get you to! You also had a big, long cry with them which I think they found hard to handle.

Today we woke up and took you to church! We’re trying to organise your christening but it is proving very difficult with all the babies due this year and holidays etc. We met with the vicar and have a potential day set. Fingers crossed it comes through!

We then went out to lunch for Father’s Day. Just to the cafe which we love so much. We walked over and you were in a great mood. The cafe was SO busy! We ordered our food and when it arrived we tried to put you in their high chair. You were ok but not for very long. You then had a full on meltdown which kind of affected all of lunch. We left and you fell asleep in the pram on the way home.

Now we’re home, you had a 2hr nap which gave us some time to relax and now you’re playing under your playmat whilst me and your Dad watch the golf.

Life is so sweet.

[rorylane1201]

Time passes so quickly! I forget to come on here and make the most of the little moments.

Your Dad had an interview today, this job proposal would be very good for us if he were successful, but it kind of fell into our laps and therefore if he doesn’t get it, we’re not worse off.

I dropped him into Watford and then met up with Nanny. You weren’t in a great mood so I had to feed you in the shopping centre - luckily they have rooms for that! - and by the time we were done so was your Dad. He came and met us at your Nanny’s favourite cafe and we had some pastries and a drink.

You sat in a high chair for the first time! You absolutely loved it and it make such a difference. You were so content. I’m so glad me and your Dad were there for such a big moment!

You have two little teeth pegs poking out of your gums now. With that and sitting up, I feel like you’re growing so quickly! You also seem to be making an attempt at crawling. I can’t keep up with you!

You’re still not napping. I miss the days where I could pop you down for an hour or two. Hopefully you’ll get into a better rhythm soon.

I left you with your Dad for a couple of hours tonight whilst I went to a wedding rehearsal. I came back to the two of you in the kitchen, you in the carrier, strapped to your Dad and 50 cent ‘if I was your best friend’ playing. I can’t explain the happiness it gave me to see you two bonding together.

My little family.