robynlauda-blog - Tumblr blog

[robynlauda-blog]

@willblackwell: Over it. Ready to get away next week for a very long time.

@robynlauda: @willblackwell batmaaaaaan #thataintcute

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Cause you said you wanted to and if it makes you happy, you should go for it.

And why’s that?

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You should go for it.

I think I’m gonna take up boxing.

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Hmm. No, not really. I like you as a boy. Yeah, but I can always just wear my chucks with them. I'm 5'9" anyway. I don't know. That you're a great person but she just doesn't like you that way? She can't be that evil of a person, Will. And if she is, what's to like? If only it was like that but girls do like guys that are mature, not that I don't think you are cause I do. Hmm. Okay then. Don't talk to her about your feelings but, I don't think she's aware of whatever's going on, Will. How would you even know she won't give you a chance if you've never spoken to her about your feelings? That's unfortunate. I guess that's the downside to caring for just one person and only that one person. What? So you're done with me too? Is that it?

Well, would you rather me be a girl? Aren’t you supposed to wear heels with a dress? Because what else would she think? It’s obvious she pities me; I want someone to respect me like I’m their equal not look down at me because I’m younger or not as mature. No, she’d already chosen him before I had a chance to talk so I just decided it wasn’t worth it. Spilling my feelings would do nothing but hurt and embarrass me so there’s no point. God, I don’t even give a shit about him, I regret bringing him up. I just thought maybe if she gave me a chance then I could prove it to her, y’know? But she wouldn’t have given me a chance if it were my last days on earth. I don’t care about seven billion people, I only cared about her. But that’s done now and she’s out of my life and that’s the way it’s gonna stay. And I’m so beyond done with girls, so that’s the end of that.

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Well, when you think about it, it can be pretty scary. Being that vulnerable and giving someone the power to break you into a million pieces. It's scary, but at the same time, the thought of finding someone who will hold you when you need it the most is amazing.

I’ll never wrap my mind around relationships. Such fragile and complicated things.

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You really are a boy. Heeeeeyyy, it wasn't funny. It was humiliating. I swear on Olympus, I'm never wearing heels with a dress ever again. Ever. How can you possibly be sure she thinks like that? Have you talked to her? Has she said it to you directly? One of the most amazing rules in accounting that can be applied in real life is this: never assume unless stated otherwise. I think you're strong for having the guts to do something about your feelings. Some of us just eat it for breakfast, hoping it will go away, but it doesn't really work that way huh? Hmm. So the rumors are true then? About you and-- you know, the girl whose name rhymes with Pony. So you've talked to her about your feelings and she rejected you? And I'm guessing the guy we're talking about here has the name that rhymes with Pam. Maybe she has her reasons for liking him. I don't think anyone's that delusional to think someone's perfect. We're all flawed and that's the beauty of it. Finding someone who appreciates you for you, flaws and all. Don't you think it's too early to give up? I mean, she may seem like the world or something to you but, there are seven billion people in the world, Will. Seven billion people. I'm positive at least one of those seven billion people like you for you. You just haven't found the girl yet or maybe you just don't notice her. You're not always firmly stuck on the friendzone. You have way too many good qualities to be stuck in that. Unlike yours truly who is in a much worse state than the friendzone, I'm brozoned. I practically outbro the bros.

Well, it certainly wasn’t unwelcome. Plus it was pretty funny for a bit there. Yeah, well, I’m pretty sure she thinks I’m both of those things and more. I can’t even look at her anymore because I don’t know if I’m more hurt or embarrassed. What are you talking about? I’m firmly stuck in the friendzone with every girl I’ve ever liked. She was only different because I’ve known her forever and I think the feelings were a long time coming. The guy she likes isn’t even right for her. I could be right for her, you know, if I was a little more confident and mature and stuff. Though this guy apparently has no flaws whatsoever. I know it’s a cliché but I don’t understand girls at all. Feelings are fucked up and I give up on them.

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Hmm. I don't know. I'm always the Julia Roberts in everyone's "My Best Friend's Wedding" story. Except I don't even get blessed enough to be the girlfriend even for a while. It's alright though. Maybe one day the tables will turn. Ohh, a dog person too. We have that in common.

They're demented then. I don't see anything wrong with you.

You need a bro to equal your bro… Okay that made no sense, but you get my point. There’s nothing wrong with that, I’m going to be the dog lady since cat’s are the bane of my existence.

I don’t know. Something they see that I don’t realize.

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@robynlauda: hanging out at one of the skateparks in NY earlier today and look at what i saw. i've probably been doing something right to be on this kid's skateboard. #heartfelt

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I don't know. Everyone says a 4.0 GPA is always intimidating. Especially when you're also athletic and your goal in life is to be the first female Formula One race car driver. I don't know. I out-bro the bros all the time. I'm positive I'll be the cat lady one day. Minus the cats cause I'm highly allergic to them.

Why do you think you scare guys off? You don't seem so bad.

Some people find intelligence intimidating. They just weren’t the type of guys you should be looking for.

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Everyone else? You loved it too? Mean. As usual? Just because it didn't work out with this girl doesn't mean it won't with every other girl. And shut up, you're not weak and you're not pathetic. You're a great person and you shouldn't base your worth on getting rejection from someone who obviously doesn't see how special you are. We're all sappy for someone. Even Adolf Hitler was sappy for someone. You don't see the jews calling him weak. Though he probably was morally speaking, because doing something so inhumane as genocide is never acceptable. But you get my point. You're not weak.

That was embarrassing for you, but everyone else loved it, so. Look, I liked a girl and it didn’t work out, okay? As usual. Now I get to be the pussy that mopes around acts like a weak-ass as usual because, let’s face it, I am weak when it comes to girls I like and I’m pretty pathetic. The end.

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I highly doubt you're that bad. I recited all the body parts of a car to a boy on a date once, including all the types of screws, lights, and wires used. And the table of elements and what happens when you mix each and every one of them to another guy. In another date.

You’re telling me. Maybe I just scare all the boys off!

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Well, have you tried? We all have our not so proud moments. Remember the time I tripped and dived in front of Matt Bomer and flashed everyone my knickers? That was pretty embarrassing. And on E! News too. Come on, I'm not gonna judge you.

I can’t. It hurts to talk about, okay? And it’s not something I’m proud of at all.

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Will, suffering in silence is not a healthy way to live a life. And come on, this is me. I'm not just anyone. I'm your best friend. We go way back. Come on. It's not like I'm telling anyone.

I don’t know, maybe I like to suffer in silence. It’s not something I would ever talk to anyone about, don’t take it personally.

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You seemed bothered by it enough though. You know you can talk to me, right?

It’s not worth it, and it was never worth it. And anyway, it’s done. I’ve cut the unnecessary people out of my life.

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That's a very interesting image to draw in class.

Sketched a dick in class today.

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Always? That's a tad bit sad.

Third or Fifth-wheeling is tolerable up to that point when you realise when in a small group of friends you’re always that one on the side.