richielipschitzaot

[richielipschitzaot]

I ask a lot of questions because it's my JOB. And while I would like to disprove that, I did say I wouldn't experiment on you and I'd prefer not to lie! Unlike you, I am a bigger person. That was rude. What I said I mean. Sorry.

But thank you! I. Hahaha not like I couldn't go in there without your permission. Okay I'll be in there in a second hahahhahahah ha ha hahbnnnm

best regards, E

----------------------

{ There's a rhythmic knock at the front door. Despite the clear attempt at a beat, it's frantic and hard to discern. }

Okay..

[He hesitates and goes to open the door, looking at him tentatively.]

“Uh. Hi.”

[richielipschitzaot]

Yeah on inspection from afar, no gills. That makes sense I guess. You are a shapeshifter after all. Do you have to be in specific conditions to change into your fish form? Like submerged in water? Maybe if you're drowning the gills come in as a danger response.. Noted! Is ocean acidification why you migrated to land? Can I come in yet or am I supposed to wait out here for you to get me. F. Not get me in a kill sense. That would be unwise.

bessttthhjbhhh . Regarding E

( ps. You say okay a lot)

You ask a lot of questions. I keep telling you, I’m not a shapeshifter! I don’t have a fish form! Or gills!

I didn’t migrate to land, because I’ve always lived on land.

You can come in, if you want..

Best Regards, Richie

[richielipschitzaot]

HAHAH RICHARD. Try as I might I don't know what the fuck you're talking about with that manga. But it's ok I'll. Figure something out. I see you by the way! I'm outside your house!! Somewhere. I'm good at hiding I think. Say cheeseeee-

Best regards, E!

( p.s I'm afraid you're associating with the wrong crowd. They're kind of mean. )

Okay…

[richielipschitzaot]

I don’t know..

HELLO. "RICHARD liPSCHITZ". Creative name you got there, sad that I've seen RIGHT THROUGH IT . HUH? YOU TGINK NO ONE WOULD NOTICE?????? I HAD MY SUSPICIONS ALREADY SINCE YOU ARE RELATED WITH ( PROVEN LIZARD PERSON) PAUL PERKINS MATTHEWS. BUT WHAT I HAVE FOUND HAS MADE ME SICK.

YOU SHAOESHIFTING

WATER DWWLLING

BEAST OF CARNAGE

I KNOW. UDDDOJT THIN K YOU'RE CLEVER. YOU ARE OBVIOUS. THE BLUE TINT TO YOUR DISGUSTING HAIR? UH. YEAH. THINK NO ONE WOULD NOTICE? IDIOT. I WILL FIND YOU AND DESCALE YOU.

Best regards, E ♡

What are you talking about.. that’s just my name?? Paul isn’t a lizard person??

What the fuck are you talking about?? This is hair dye.

[richielipschitzaot]

He told me to give this to you.

"HEY. YIU. I rESENT THAT NOTION. I AM MYSDLF AND NOTHING MORE. DO NOT COMPARE ME TO THAT. ?????!?!! I DON'T KNOW WHAT SHE IS YET BUT THERE'S SOMETHING WRONG WITH HER. SHE WAS TOO NICE TO ME WHEN I WAS OUT WALKING. WHO DOES THAT???!?!?????? FUCKIJG FREEK IS WHO. ANYWAYS I DONT LIKE YOU AND I'M GOING TO GET YOUR FAMILY ADDICTED TO HEROIN. CHEERS

WORST regards, E "

HELLO. "RICHARD liPSCHITZ". Creative name you got there, sad that I've seen RIGHT THROUGH IT . HUH? YOU TGINK NO ONE WOULD NOTICE?????? I HAD MY SUSPICIONS ALREADY SINCE YOU ARE RELATED WITH ( PROVEN LIZARD PERSON) PAUL PERKINS MATTHEWS. BUT WHAT I HAVE FOUND HAS MADE ME SICK.

YOU SHAOESHIFTING

WATER DWWLLING

BEAST OF CARNAGE

I KNOW. UDDDOJT THIN K YOU'RE CLEVER. YOU ARE OBVIOUS. THE BLUE TINT TO YOUR DISGUSTING HAIR? UH. YEAH. THINK NO ONE WOULD NOTICE? IDIOT. I WILL FIND YOU AND DESCALE YOU.

Best regards, E ♡

What are you talking about.. that’s just my name?? Paul isn’t a lizard person??

What the fuck are you talking about?? This is hair dye.

[richielipschitzaot]

Ok that's good I was worried I would have to CUT YOUR TONGUE OUT or something haha thank you for being so understanding! I'm sorry for threatening to cut you open with a rusty scalpel I woul d only do that to bad people. But you're not a person so your badness doesn't count! The spyware is worrying though I might need to use a skin suit to look like someone else as to not be prosecuted by the space outlaws who are always watching. Do you want me to buy you something or are you sappy and gonna say something like " my family being safe is all I need. " ( wrong, by the way. Your family is temporary and materials are forever. I could get you a funky little figurine or something I know they appeal to you.) Haha aaawwwwwwwwwwww h hh do you know what you taste like. I'll be over at your house in 19 seconds.

Best regards, E!

( P. S I appreciate your adaptation to my sign off, that tells me a lot about you and your species! )

Okay..

I don’t think we have spyware.

Um, I guess? The newest manga of Moon Tami would be nice..

Uh, no. Okay.

Best Regards, Richie

(P.S 👍)

[richielipschitzaot]

You drive a hard bargain alevin. Can I at least inspect you or something? No cutting or experimenting needed! And I'll take the cameras out as requested! If I remember where they are at least. Do you have gills? Have you adapted to the land enough to not need them? Weird. Can I bring my own camera and take some pictures that's ok right. Is Paul home he might kick me out. nevermind forgot I could check! Do you have spyware in your house. Will you suck my brain out with your tongue.

Best regards, E

If you take the cameras out and leave my family alone then.. okay. But only inspecting!

I don’t have gills because I’m not a fish. If you want, I guess..

I don’t know. Maybe? No, why would I do that?

Best Regards, Richie

[richielipschitzaot]

I HAVE CAMERAS IN YOUR HOME. TRY TO FIND THEM INF YOU WNAY BUT YOU NEVER WIKL YOU LYIJG MONSYER. I OUGHTA THRWOW YOU INTO THE SEA AND LET A FISHING BOAT DEAL WIH YOU. PAUL AND YOU MAY HAVE DENIED IT BUT I KNOW! I KNOW I KNOW I KNOW I HAVE PROOF IKNOW IT'S REAL I KNOW WHAT I KNOW YOU CAN'T TRICK ME vhhhh SLIPPEERY LITTLE GUPPY.

Anyways would tuesday be ok I'll use a clean scalpel? ♡ 💞 I have sedative in my shed you won't feel a thing x ill buy you something to compensate. Anything

Best regards, E

WHAT?! HOW DID YOU GET INTO MY HOUSE?!

I’M NOT LYING TO YOU! I’M NOT A FISH! I’M A HUMAN BEING!

… If you get to see me in person, will you please take the cameras out of my house and leave me and my family alone?

But you’re not experimenting on me.

Best regards, Richie

[richielipschitzaot]

Lkkhuhhhhhbjsjsjdbksbh AAAAAAAAAAAA please? I'm trying so hard to be kind and caring and not just kidnap you and cut you open with a rusty scalpel right nowwww x O xo I promise i won't take anything out I just wanna look

Best regards, E

I don’t want to be cut open with a rusty scalpel! I’m a human being, not someone for you to experiment on!

Leave me alone!!

Regards, Richie

[richielipschitzaot]

What if I ask real nicely. Fish boy. X pleaaaaase just let me vivisect you mate

Best regards, E

No! And I’m not a fish boy!

Regards, Richie (?)

[richielipschitzaot]

hi richie!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! how’s paul doin ?????

I think he’s doing okay, I haven’t talked to him since yesterday

[richielipschitzaot]

YOUU ARE HUSYSG AS STUBBOR N AS YOUR CRYPTIF RELATIVE. LiAR LIAR LIAR LIAR LIAR I KNOW WHAT JUOHA ARE I'M SURE OF IT YOU CAN'T FOOL ME. USELESS HORRIFYING SEA BEAST. EEVEN THEN YOU ARE BRAINWASHED. HAVE YOU EVER TGOUHHT ABOUT IT? " HAIR DYE"? DIE IS RIGHT IN THE NAME! IT'S JUST ANOTHER WAY TO POISON OUR BRAINS AND MAKE US SLAVES. IDIOT. FUCKING FKSH.

But if you would agree I would like to run some experiments on you to learn I hop e you agree! You could be very helpful heart heart x love you

Best regards, E

I’M NOT A SEA BEAST! I’M A HUMAN BEING! I’m Richard Lipschitz, I’m human.

I’m pretty sure it’s just made of harmless chemicals and colouring.. and no!! I don’t want you to experiment on me!

Richie, (I guess??)

[richielipschitzaot]

HELLO. "RICHARD liPSCHITZ". Creative name you got there, sad that I've seen RIGHT THROUGH IT . HUH? YOU TGINK NO ONE WOULD NOTICE?????? I HAD MY SUSPICIONS ALREADY SINCE YOU ARE RELATED WITH ( PROVEN LIZARD PERSON) PAUL PERKINS MATTHEWS. BUT WHAT I HAVE FOUND HAS MADE ME SICK.

YOU SHAOESHIFTING

WATER DWWLLING

BEAST OF CARNAGE

I KNOW. UDDDOJT THIN K YOU'RE CLEVER. YOU ARE OBVIOUS. THE BLUE TINT TO YOUR DISGUSTING HAIR? UH. YEAH. THINK NO ONE WOULD NOTICE? IDIOT. I WILL FIND YOU AND DESCALE YOU.

Best regards, E ♡

What are you talking about.. that’s just my name?? Paul isn’t a lizard person??

What the fuck are you talking about?? This is hair dye.

[richielipschitzaot]

ooc he’s being held by his scruff. that’s his. uh. cat friend.

ooc I drew one of your clones.

Why is Ven getting carried by a cat.

OOC: HHHH I LOVE HIM

[richielipschitzaot]

[He runs off sobbing about how no one understands his love for ham. This happens. Daily.]

(Stapling ham to his forehead, the walls, anyone he comes in contact with.)

Richie, what are you doing?!

[richielipschitzaot]

“I WAS SHARING THE BEAUTY OF HAM WITH YOU!!”

(Stapling ham to his forehead, the walls, anyone he comes in contact with.)

Richie, what are you doing?!

[richielipschitzaot]

[The ham flaps on his face whilst he shakes him. You cannot see his eyes.]

“YOU SCOUNDREL!”

(Stapling ham to his forehead, the walls, anyone he comes in contact with.)

Richie, what are you doing?!