redlimvs - Tumblr blog

redlimvs · 11 months ago

Text

They're Cheap (I'm Free) // Zero Day (18+)

Calm winds before a strong storm, between a name and a prayer, was there really a difference? The stars in the night sky could never compare, so why did it matter? Why did anything matter if everything was going to be taken to the grave?

Bit by bit, flesh by flesh, everyone was the same, everyone had only one life to live, so they all figured to make the most of it all, becoming the worst people for that single life they chose to live.

Calvin watched as he stared off far into the night sky, his hair flowing gently as the cool breeze ran through him, watching as the trees rustled before the big storm. He was up on the roof again, the roof of his house where he found himself most of the time. He breathed in the cold and wet air, his heart pounding gently with every beat.

He sometimes would wish he was who he was before, someone who was so pure and grateful for everything, even as he rewatched old video tapes of him when he were younger, he wished to be taken back into his younger self. But now, he felt lost, stuck in an eternity of limbo for years to decades, feeling that if he asked for too much, he would throw up.

Calvin had very little troubles in school, he had a good enough friend group, somewhat stable grades, but good things never exactly happened to people for very long. The only good thing he could recall in his life was meeting his best friend, Andre.

While to others, the two appeared to be like every other kid in school, Andre participated in a few sports here and there, and the two seemed to have a few people they would consider their friends. But Andre and Calvin were close, far closer than anyone else to them, they shared their deepest thoughts, their embarrassing secrets, no one else around him seemed to have gotten as far as they did with each other.

Rachel noticed this, feeling that Calvin acted so differently and cold when he was around Andre. She worried that Andre had been saying things to him, but he was quick to deny it all and defend his dear friend, unaware of what she had been telling him.

He looked down at the ground below him, a good nine to ten feet away from where he was sitting. He recalled the times where he had Andre’s back and Andre had his, the sweet and enjoyable moments the two spent together to hide the fact that they were planning something drastic.

“What are you doing up here again? Our plan’s supposed to be tomorrow and if you stay up any later we’re gonna have to restart the god damn mission.”

Calvin didn’t bother turning his head, the two had gotten so close with each other it was easy to distinguish their voices from everybody else. He felt as Andre shuffled beside him, sitting down to just stare at wherever Calvin was staring, which was him.

Andre meant so much to Calvin, feeling that the two had gotten closer over the course of their planning, it saddened him with the fact that they weren’t going to see each other anymore, after they succeeded, the two would pull the triggers on themselves, just like how Calvin suggested it. For a period of time, Andre was reluctant, feeling that he wasn’t ready to give himself up and instead came up with a second option, the option to simply flee and never come back.

“You’re stupid for coming up with something like that,” He remembered telling Andre the day he brought up his own idea. It would be pointless to run away, they would be searched and found soon enough rather than quickly get it over with.

Calvin’s mind was set, nothing was going to change the fact that suicide was the only way out. It didn’t mean he couldn’t enjoy himself a little longer before they had to put their plan into action.

He remembered the first day he placed his lips against Andre’s, it was the night of prom, just hours after it had ended. While he had taken his friend, Rachel, he couldn’t help but keep his mind on his friend, who said he wasn’t going to go to “some stupid dance with more stupid people.”

On the ride back, Calvin hesitated before asking the driver to take him to Andre’s house, not forgetting the way everybody else in the limo began to choke and snicker at the request. They weren’t his friends, they were just people Rachel was friends with, and Calvin didn’t like any single one of them.

He rushed into Andre’s house without taking a second glance of everyone who was still in the limo, picking up his pace as he made it to the door. When the car pulled away and Andre opened, his eyebrows furrowed.

It was late, his parents were now asleep by this time, and Calvin just pushed his friend away and went into Andre’s room, where he followed behind, not saying a word until they sat on his bed.

“So, how was the dance? You danced and kissed Rachel?” Andre asked annoyingly, his arms crossed as he asked Calvin. Calvin said nothing, his hands fidgeting with each other the entire time. Andre grew frustrated and opened his mouth to speak even more, but that was when Calvin turned to him, grabbed him by the face, and pressed his face against his, tilting it slightly to interlock their lips together.

The kiss was rushed and messy, Calvin quickly pulling away after realizing what he had done. He was stammering, shaking, in complete disbelief with what he had just done, neither of the two were gay, at least Calvin thought he wasn’t gay, but he was so sure that Andre was completely straight, he was ready to be yelled at and get told to leave his house and never speak to him again, though it pained him to think of such things, he knew it was coming.

What he didn’t see coming was the way Andre leaned towards Calvin, eyes flickering to his lips then back to his face before he kissed him, only more softer than the first time. He shuffled closer, his hands placed on his own lap as he kissed Calvin.

There was no feeling of self acceptance, no idea what it was like to feel some sort of worth in life. Slowly but surely, he planned to make himself known, he wanted the world to know everything, he wanted to feel important for once.

Yet, together, away from all of the shit, he could give everything a rest. He wanted one more day before their plan, one day to make himself feel happy, he couldn’t wait to leave prom the moment it ended, couldn’t wait for the limo to take him to his friend, couldn’t wait to promise forever to him, even when they succeeded.

It seemed Andre was thinking the same thing, sighing once Calvin kissed him back, the two embarking in sweet and loving kisses every now and then.

“Are you thinking of gay shit right now? Quit staring at me,” Andre said brutally, but all Calvin did was laugh softly, knowing fully well that he didn’t mean it that way. In truth, he had stared at Andre for a bit longer than he thought, and like Andre said, he had been thinking of stuff, but he smiled at him endearingly, brushing his hand against his friend’s before holding it tight.

“Jeez, what’s got you acting like this...” Andre muttered, shivering slightly as Calvin’s fingers began gently rubbing his wrist.

“Sorry...I’ve just been thinking, about tomorrow,” He answered sheepishly.

“What about it? Don’t say you’re gonna back out now, I’ll hate you forever.”

Calvin laughed again and shook his head before staring back at him. “No, it’s not that. I just thought, why not enjoy the last night we’ll share together, before it all goes to shit, you know?”

“I...I guess? What would we even do during this time?”

Calvin had an idea, but it made his cheeks flush pink and his body all warm. It was embarrassing, but it excited him greatly, to be with Andre for the final day, then he would gladly blow his brains out the next day.

“...I want us to enjoy each other one final time, I want to make you feel good, Andre. Let me take care of you, please.”

Andre’s face only shifted slightly, and even while his face remained still, Calvin would feel his hand slightly shaking underneath him.

“Shit...” Andre breathed out a small laugh. “Fuck, I mean. Go for it, last time for good luck, right?”

Calvin smiled, nodding before moving closer to Andre, holding his cheek with one of his hands as he stared at him softly. “Last time, I’ll make you feel good,” He replied before pressing a gentle kiss on his lips, standing up on the roof to climb back into his window, Andre following right behind.

The rain spoke quietly, the soothing sound hiding the fact that it was just silent. Calvin slowly pulled Andre closer, pushing him down gently on his bed before climbing on top of him, enjoying the sight of his friend simply laying there, his eyes sparkling. Calvin’s hand slept at the lowest depth of his back, his palm sculpting out a perfect arch as Andre gasped at the touch.

His fingertips danced along Andre’s skin, his shirt now lifted so that Calvin could see all. He laid there, watching as Calvin moved gracefully like an artist in motion, brushing his chest and stomach as he painted his body with his mouth, sucking and biting gently at his skin until he let out a breathy moan.

Andre had the urge to trace over the spots Calvin was last, the urge to feel the bite marks that painted his shoulder and neck, he had the urge to inhale his strong aroma, the urge to taste his lips and comb at his hair with his fingers.

But Calvin did his own things, planting a few more kisses before removing both of their pants, Andre feeling completely exposed in the middle of the night.

“You’re amazing...” Calvin whispered, his hands drifting down to grasp at Andre’s hips. He’d never thought words would get him so tipsy, so addicted and craving more of it as they kissed. As he watched Calvin prep himself, he couldn’t help but think of what was going to happen the next day.

It was never his idea to kill themselves, it was never his idea to surrender himself to the gun and shoot himself. He could have imagined another life where the two had fled the scene, driving away in Andre’s car to escape the police before they found them and ending up in whatever city they ended up in, Andre had a different approach to what they would do, but Calvin overruled him.

With little surprise, Calvin groaned gently once he was in Andre, quiet gasps and groans filled his bedroom, and Andre was going crazy. He grabbed Calvin’s shoulder and clawed at his skin as Calvin was pleasuring him, enjoying the sight of Andre hiding his face and the sensation of his nails in his skin.

He pushed, causing Andre’s back to lift up a bit as he opened his mouth, though no sound had come out of him at that moment. His movements hushed and steady, yet it brought so much pleasure to Andre.

His body ached at the feeling, an intimacy Andre had never known.

In the darkness, two shadows would reach through the hopeless, heavy dusk. Their bodies would meet, fitting together unlike the rest. The two had a bond no one else did, so emotional that the two were connected immediately.

Calvin’s lips met with Andre’s a final time before he gasped, the two trembling before he rested next to Andre, staring at him again as he stared back, no words needed to be said in that moment. While they would soon be gone tomorrow, Andre was more than happy to have shared such an experience with Calvin, interlocking their hands together before he dozed off, his mind solely filled with the next day.

#andre kriegman #zero day 2003 #caldre #calvin gabriel #zero day #army of two #cal gabriel

16 notes · View notes