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Embracing the friendship. Ecclesiastes 4:9-12. 🧸

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Update: being called the "baby version" of my fave resi, she personally encouraged me to pursue OB 🥹

To be trusted by your fave Resi 🥹🙌🏻🤍

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To be trusted by your fave Resi 🥹🙌🏻🤍

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It's amazing to find someone who can read you like a book in just a short period of time. It's a bit scary and heartwarming at the same time.

Still, thank you. I feel so seen. 🥹

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Rise and collapse of a wave. Details of paintings by Michael Zeno Diemer (1867-1939)

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"It's so crazy

Lately

You just understand my feelings

Make me

See I'm capable and fine

And feeling beautified tonight

I'm ready to dive"

If I could summarize what my life feels like recently, this song would perfectly reflect what I feel. Everything feels right ~ that I should not hold back and should dive in ahead because He got me. My days aren't perfect, but they are filled with more glimmers instead of triggers. The people around me are a testament to how much loved and valued I am and of His faithfulness. Grabii, He really answers prayers and makes things beautiful in His perfect time.

Maybe this is what it feels like to see life in a different lens once you are coming from a place of genuine love from the Author of love Himself.

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Clerkship Journal Entry no. 1

I once told a close friend that I think I resonate so much with Dr. Jang Gyeoul from Hospital Playlist and I am convinced that my clerkship rotations would be my living proof for it. 😅

Since day 1, I can't help but feel so grateful because I was grouped with the best PGIs and residents. And I guess I already found my Dr. Lee Ikjun and Dr. Kim Junwan... although sometimes I feel like they found me first. 🥹

Dr. MC 👩🏻‍⚕️ Most PGIs and clerks are not fond of having ER duties with her, but so far, my 1st two ER-OB rotations were the best duty posts that I genuinely enjoyed. Yes, she is firm and strict when it comes to patient care and most people would find it rude or unnecessary but as someone who understands why she acts that way in the ER, I can't help but feel deep respect and admiration for her practicality and wisdom. Admissions are fast, patients don't pile up and wait for hours, and everyone's concern is speedily addressed. She's like Junwan, who has a cold facade ~ some might even say heartless, but idk why, but I can see her heart and passion in her actions. She's also the sweetest resident whenever there's a dip in the toxicity in the ER. She would always offer us food, remind us to sit and take breaks whenever possible and she would always allow us to go home early once all endorsements are properly given to the next team who would man the ER with her. I pray that my next duty-posts with her will always be high-yield but not necessarily toxic. Nawa masarap lahat ulam ni Doc during residency nya ✨️ (1st photo, I was assisting Doc while she's doing an ultrasound on one patient.)

Dr. DDC 👨🏻‍⚕️, my TMC version of Ik-jun. Best in PR and very stellar. He knows everyone and is friends with everyone! He's always ready to teach and assist. He always encourages and would gently tap me on the shoulder or nudge me whenever he senses that I'm feeling anxious or lost during duty. He's really like how Ik-jun mentors Gyeoul in HP. I even remember what he told me when I was tasked by a resident to ask for an initial reading from the Radiology Department, "Kaya mo yan, big girl ka na." Lol 😅 (context: Radio Resis/Consultants usually asks alot of questions about the patient and their case, so before any referral or initial reading you must have a general knowledge about the patient and have seen and talked to the patient beforehand so that you can answer their questions.) I am praying that he will have a successful PLE, residency and practice🙏🏻 (2nd Photo, dokie's stethoscope, when he asked me to keep it for him because he will do a referral to another department)

I am looking forward to all the learnings that I will still have under their supervision and guidance. I pray that all my future Resi's and PGIs in other rotations will be as kind, approachable, and stellar like them 🥹✨️

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D-2

Medical Assessment and Clearance. OB-Gyne courtesy call and department tour. Approachable and kind PGIs, residents, and consultants. Met my groupmates and duty buddies ~ friendly and cool people. Brunch at 3pm. Hot and humid wards. Sudden rains. Migraine. 🥲 Fighting!

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calm before the storm. letting my thoughts drift away from my clerkship jitters. a random playlist ʸᵉᵖ ˡᵃˢᵗ ˢᵒⁿᵍ'ˢ ᵃ ʷᵒʳˢʰᶦᵖ ᵒⁿᵉ.

D-3 OB-Gyne rotation

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"Their emotions shift rapidly, moving from ecstasy to despair in a matter of minutes. This constant ebb and flow can make the Four think their emotions are unmanageable, wild, or out of control."

hang in there buddy 🌻

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note to self: calm down. be still. deep breaths.

my favorite rendition of clair de lune 🌙

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Last day working as medical technologist at a free-standing diagnostic laboratory 🥹

This place became my place of breakthrough and growth. My safe place for quiet time and prayer (after morning peaks and during benign duty days).

It helped me regain and improve my social skills that online classes and long periods of lockdown took away.

I will surely miss the interactions with San Pablo people and the kindest Lolo's and Lola's, Tito's and Tita's. I'm sorry I declined a lot of your 'reto'/dating offers 😅 I hope that the next time I'll meet you, you're all healthier.

Rehab days will be missed too ~ the adrenaline and thrill of extracting, processing, and releasing results for 25-30 patients, I can say that it really improved my phlebotomy skills so much! I will also miss the view of Mt. Arayat from the facility.

Shelter days opened my eyes and gave me new perspectives about PH's mental healthcare system. There's still so much to learn and improve. I hope my kababayans would have better access to mental health services.

Sir MP, thank you for being the kindest boss. For being so patient and forgiving, especially when I was still a rookie.

Sir EGI, "wag kang pasindak" haha 😄 You are the best junior I trained so far. Super kind and attentive. Maybe the next time I'd see you, we're both MDs already.

End of an era.

DLGG, RMT (CMT) signing off.

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Personal Entry (TMI)

⚠️CW: death, su*cide

;

The Lord is so good. One day late, super busy kahapon late ko na naalala yung date... Nagsstream pa ako ng kanta ni Kumareng Taylor nung niremind ako ni Lord about June 18. Imagine having a breakthrough while listening to Daylight 😭 (wala talagang pinipiling time si Lord) 🥲

Eniwiii, cheers to 2 years 🥹✨️ Grabe yung love and grace ni Lord 🙌🏻 Let's make it to 27 and beyoooond 🌻

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D-6 to comprehensive exams. Sometimes, doubt and fear creep in, but I know that if I continue showing up and be more intentional on my study routines, I would be closer to reaching my goals.

Also, some random snaps I took recently.

Miras mu rin 🌻

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Rereading some chapters on obstetrics that I really find challenging. It's still hot and humid, perfect time for an instant iced coffee. I also just love the way the sunlight accentuates the new leaves of our tamarind tree. And as usual, Almond sleeping in front of my pc 😄

I hope everyone will have a joyful May! 🌻

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Some snaps from last week. Finally done with my final exams, I will now prepare for my comprehensive exams. Please pray and wish some luck for me ~ I'm hoping to be promoted to clerkship this June/July 🙏🏻✨️

I also met most of my classmates for the 1st time last week, and some of my cool and good professors (one even bought lunch for us ~ mcdo meal). Excited to do clerkship with these wonderful people! 🤗🌻

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Final topics for pedia and first half of Gyne tonight. Discord with my med-sis, whom I really appreciate!

Almond (my cat) doing all his cat activities, he tried to bite the sides of my monitor screen and play with the plant. Thankfully, he's a good boy and behaved well after a couple of warnings.

A firefly from last night! ✨️

D-5 to final exam