reddawnmultimuse

[reddawnmultimuse]

[ ok so i remade my side blog. but I'm being extra super duper careful not to use any naughty words so daddy tumblr doesn't get mad again. It'll be for sin, a sin blog. if you're interested, visit us at the @reddawndistrict ]

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Deidara is nonchalantly eating an onion like an apple. Why were people breaking into Kakuzu's room through the window? He has a door.

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Hidan wasn't the biggest fan of sweets. But, he decided to treat himself to his one cookie after so much hard labour. As he chewed on it, he looked at Konan for her reaction. And what a reaction it was. She had stars glittering in her eyes. As she proclaimed it the best thing she ever ate, Hidan laughed. Not at her. He just laughed.

"Yer gonna make me blush harder than a pig in make-up, Angel! I'm glad ya like it. Got at least a dozen here, so treat yerself! N' do it quick. Once Pink-Eye and Blondie git back, ain't gonna be none left, I reckon."

Nothing much was left between the two of them. Kakuzu loved it because it meant no food waste. But it also meant buying ingredients every time Hidan wanted to cook. And he had to use them then and there. Otherwise, they didn't survive come next morning. He once caught Deidara casually eating an entire red onion. Like an apple!

She would chuckle quietly at his comment, looking up from the cookies but immediately having to look away after he winked. Her cheeks warmed as an uncertain feeling coiled. It wasn't intimidation, but something about catching his gaze had her stomach flip.

She would pondered that thought, trying to name the unfamiliar feeling whilst he cooled the cookies down. Her daze broke as he offered her one after all that time waiting.

It looked so perfect she almost didn't want to eat it. In fact, she felt the twang of guilt build in her mind at not being able to preserve it, but she would push that thought down as she took a small bite.

Covering her mouth and her smile as she chewed. The flavours and warmth were something she had nothing to compare to.

"This might be the best thing I ever ate."

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The meeting place was a jagged cleft in the rock, high enough above the valley floor to be hidden from prying eyes and eavesdropping ears.

Sasori stood with arms folded, cloak swaying faintly in the wind, his gaze fixed on the lone figure hiking their way up the cliff face. The Iwa spy approached, hood shadowing their face, and gave an acknowledging nod.

"Report," Sasori said.

The spy cleared their throat. "Aye, weel, yer lot's been causin' a right stramash doon the wye. Kumo's fair radge aboot it, an' the Tsuchikage's tellin’ us tae keep oor neb clean, ken? But yon envoy’s went pure agley, an’ the stuff’s stuck up by the brae. Oh, an’ watch yersels, there’s blathers o’ Kumo Jōnin roamin’ oon the road, nae jest fer the craic."

Sasori blinked, staring at the Iwa spy for a long, awkward moment before finally turning to Deidara. "What the fuck did 'e say?"

Deidara let out a sigh, flicking his hair back. "He says we’re causing trouble, Kumo’s pissed, Iwa wants to stay out of it, supplies are delayed, and there’s Kumo Jōnin patrolling nearby, hn."

Hiruko's eyes narrowed. "Why the fuck didn't 'e just say that?"

"He did say that, Danna."

The spy grinned. "Och, that’s whit ah said, right enough. Maibe yer puppet heid’s jist stuffed wi’ sawdust, nae brains."

Deidara burst out laughing. "Aye, yer spot oan, mate," He fired back to the spy, his own Iwa accent on full display.

"Ye think he aye scrans wi’ that greetin’ puss, or is it nailed oan?" The spy asked Deidara.

"Nailed oan. If he smiled, the hinges’d rust." Deidara gestured at his own face.

"Bet he’s the sort tae polish ’is ain face in the nicht."

Deidara laughed again. "Aye."

Hiruko's bloodshot eyes flicked between the two gibberish-speaking Iwa-nin. "…I’m assuming this is about the mission. For your sakes."

"Aye," Deidara said before catching his slip-up and clearing his throat. "Yes, Sasori-no-Danna."

[reddawnmultimuse]

[ funny thought of sasori and deidara having to speak to someone from iwa and sasori having no idea what they're saying so getting deidara to "translate". and then sasori having no idea what either of them are saying as they talk to each other. ]

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Hidan finally pushed off the wall, turning just enough to glare down at Ino. Before she could react, his fist tangled in the front of her shirt. With one sharp yank, he picked her up on her feet, and slammed her back into the wall. "I'm not apologizin' for shit."

"Ya think you can just drop out of the ceilin' n' ride me like a damn rodeo bull?" His voice was low, more akin to a snarl than a question. "I was walkin' my happy ass down here to patch ya up. But no. You just had to git outta yer bindin's n' piss me off." She wasn't bleeding anymore, either. Had she healed her own wounds? Clever girl.

Before she could answer, his other hand shot up, gripping her jaw hard enough to force her head back against the wall. The pressure on her throat wasn’t enough to choke, but it made every breath shallow.

"I was gonna fix you. Now?" His lip curled into something between a sneer and a grin, exhibiting rows of gapped, white teeth, fake and real. "Now I’m thinkin’ maybe I should see how many holes I can put in you before ya black out. Or bleed out."

Then, something shifted in his expression. Ino couldn't see it, but Hidan just had a lightbulb moment. Like in a cartoon. All of a sudden, he tossed her across the basement as if she weighed nothing.

"Let's make this interestin'," He jabbed a finger at the bloodied knife on the floor. The one Ino removed from her side. "Pick it up, Princess. Go on. Let’s see which one of us can stab the other first."

He might as well have fun. He hadn't had the pleasure of facing her back in Konoha. So, he wanted to see what she was capable of when her life was on the line. Would she take the bait and try to attack him? Or would she flee?

“Fine! Thank you for not killing me despite me telling you to get on with it! There! Now you apologize!”

Of course she wasn’t going to give up on that apology without a fight. He certainly wasn’t making it easy to stay latched onto him however. His movements were violent, and she had to squeeze her legs tight around him to prevent herself from flying off. And then he had to annoyingly bend his arm back and grab a fist full of her long hair and yank it, making her yelp, 

“Hey! You can’t pull on a girl’s hair! That’s cheating!” Ino pulled his hair again in retaliation. Completely ignoring the fact that she had been pulling on his hair the entire time. It was fine for her to pull his hair but not the other way around! That's not how things worked!

Hidan’s attempts at getting her off was only causing Ino’s body to grind up against his back. He could feel all her curves and her large chest pressing up against him. That is, until he smashed her against the wall. The impact knocked the air out of her lungs. She was so lucky he didn’t crack her ribs in the process. Her legs loosened and she dropped off of him, letting go of his hair as her feet dropped to the floor. Ino couldn’t fully drop to the floor due to his large body keeping her shoved up against the wall,

“O-okay fine, you win! I let go! Stop trying to crush me with your fat ass!” Ino tried to shove him off, even if she knew it was pointless. It was like the guy was a metal wall. She wished she had Sakura’s strength so she could just throw the guy. If she got out of this, she really needed to work out more. Not that it would ever get her close to Sakura’s freakish strength. 

[reddawnmultimuse]

[ i'm in a music mood. so here is the main song i associate with each of my muses. ]

Funny Little Feeling by Rock 'n' Roll Soldiers [ deidara ]

Eternity by IAMX [ sasori ]

Death (Synthwave remix) by Æther Realm [ uchiha itachi ]

Fallout by UNSECRET X Neoni [ hidan ]

War by Poets of the Fall [ for konan & nagato ]

Modern Crusaders by Enigma [ hoshigaki kisame ]

Broken English by SCHAFT [ kakuzu ]

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[ was reminded of the best movie soundtrack by @shisui-uchiha-anon and would like to share my go-to song for itachi & shisui ]

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I spent 4 days of my life drawing nonstop to bring you the most convoluted shipping chart I could manage

[reddawnmultimuse]

The Chaotic Good Tsuchikage

Following the sudden death of the Fourth Tsuchikage, the succession process in Iwagakure, drenched in ceremonial tradition, unexpectedly named Katsu Deidara as the next in line, and the notorious missing-nin and former Akatsuki member was declared the Fifth Tsuchikage.

The Elders were outraged. Not only because he was ex-Akatsuki, but a Katsu. However, they were politically cornered. Overturning the decision would create a scandal, so they grudgingly allowed his coronation, assuming his rule would be short-lived, either through political failure or assassination. They thought he’d burn Iwa to the ground.

Deidara did think about it. For about five minutes. Then he realized something better. He'd make Iwagakure perfect. An Iwa for everyone to be proud of.

And so began the reign of the most spitefully benevolent Tsuchikage in Iwa’s history.

He swallowed his pride and stood in front of the cameras to apologize to Gaara for his assassination and attack on Sunagakure. He reinforced the peace treaty with Konohagakure, even shaking hands with the Rokudaime Hokage, Hatake Kakashi. He signed new peace treaties with Kumo and Kiri.

He poured ryo into war veteran care, free lunches for underprivileged academy kids, and infrastructure so solid it would take decades to wear down. He even created an art grant, obviously.

Every law, every program, every single "good deed" was another thorn in the Elders’ side, because the moment they tried to undo it, they’d look like the villains.

Privately, Deidara understood his days as Tsuchikage were numbered. He worked with urgency, determined to pass as many enduring reforms as possible before the Elders inevitably had him killed.

While Deidara’s initial motivation was undeniably petty, designing "good" laws to sabotage his successors, the role changed him in subtle ways.

Though he never openly admitted it, those closest to him believe that doing good--truly good--was the first time in years he felt at peace with himself. Even if the spite that started it all never truly faded, he seemed to find a strange pride in the fact that his "art" this time was building something instead of destroying it.

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[ late night thought of deidara getting amnesia and falling in love with the nearest uchiha. ]

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Hidan froze for half a second, feeling her legs lock tighter around his waist and her arm dig into his throat. She could not be serious.

"Oh, you’ve gotta be fuckin' kiddin' me…" But Ino was not, in fact, fucking kidding him.

He snarled, jerking his shoulders violently to try and shake her loose with no success. He twisted hard to the left, then the right, but she had her legs locked in. The hair-pulling wasn’t helping either, every yank made his temper burn hotter.

"You should be thankin' me I ain't delivered you a slow, and painful death!" After this, though, she may not have such a luxury.

Then, in one sudden motion, he twisted his arm all the way backwards with an unnatural, mechanical grind. Bone wasn't meant to bend like that. Except, it wasn't bone. His hand grabbed onto her blonde hair and yanked hard to wrench her off. Again, to no success. She was on him like a baby possum onto a mama possum.

Hidan snarled. "Alright, fine. Have it yer way!"

He took three fast steps toward the wall, planted his feet, and slammed his back into it. The whole wall rattled from the impact. Hell, the whole house must've quaked.

He turned his head, glaring through strands of wet hair that clung to his face. "Ya done yet? Or do ya want more?" She pushed himself back, sandwiching Ino between him and the brick wall. If she didn't let go, he'd just crush her to death.

“Yargh!”

A loud battle cry erupted from above Hidan as Ino dropped down from the ceiling on top of him. Her arms went around his neck and her legs around his waist from behind to make it harder for him to buck her off. She grabbed and pulled on his hair with one hand while the other arm was attempting to choke him,

“You bastard! You left me with a knife inside me! Thats so fucked up!”

Now she had more things to be offended by than just the nude. On top of that, the knife could have caused an infection! Not that he would care, he’s going to kill her anyway but she cared! Ino took note of the things he dropped when she suddenly came down from the ceiling. It puzzled her. They were all medical supplies. Was he planning on bandaging her up? That was an awfully nice thing for him to want to do after his outburst,

“You owe me an apology! A big, major one!”

As Ino was pulling on his hair, she noticed it was wet, and he smelled clean. So nice that he got to shower and be comfortable while she was left suffering in the dirty, gross basement! But that means that they were in a house of some kind. She was under the assumption that she was in the basement of some creepy warehouse. Maybe she was still in the village? Or not far from it? Really how far could he have gotten while she was knocked out?

Ino had doubts she would be able to escape but at the very least she can make herself an annoyance like she was right now. He really wasn’t making it easy to stay latched onto him. She was trying her best to keep a tight hold onto him the entire time he was trying to pull her off,

“Apologize!” Ino demanded again as she tugged on his hair.

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Would Kazekage Sasori get bitches tho? 👀

"Hmph. What a rubbish question. If you’re askin' whether they’d flock to me? Of course. Power draws people in, and as Kazekage, I’d have more than enough of it. But I’m not interested in fleetin' attention or shallow affections."

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@thatsneakymedic: Just a reminder that Orochimaru killed Garra's dad to uses the Sand Village to destroy the Leaf. Sooooo, how do you think THAT would happen if Sasori is the Kazekage?

[ that's a great question! since sasori never joined the akatsuki, he doesn't have as much of a hate boner for orochimaru. but, here's my thoughts off the top of my head: ]

Sasori would NEVER trust anyone from Konoha. Especially a Sannin. He fought in the Third War, he saw what Konoha was capable of. Not to mention all the anti-Konoha propaganda they were likely fed.

Plus, Orochimaru’s entire pitch would reek of manipulation. Sasori would see through the bullshit and "shared enemy" angle instantly. Orochimaru’s offer essentially boils down to "help me destroy Konoha." But what does Sasori actually gain? Territory? Resources? Even if they succeed, Konoha’s allies could retaliate, starting a Fourth War. Also, Sasori knows Orochimaru is untrustworthy and self-serving. The risks would outweigh the rewards.

If the plan went south, Orochimaru would happily abandon Suna to take the fall. And joining forces with a known rogue like Orochimaru could make Suna look desperate or reckless. Suna was very proud and staunchly opposed to seeking help from others. You get a look at this when Konoha was brought in to rescue Gaara. Chiyo and Ebizo openly expressed their disapproval. Maybe because they saw what happened to Rasa.

Seriously, Rasa asked to die. Orochimaru was already notorious for betrayal. His defection from Konoha, his crimes in forbidden jutsu research, and human experimentation were common knowledge. Everything about it literally screamed, "will betray you the moment it benefits him.". Rasa knew exactly who he was dealing with and still agreed to join forces! He deserved to get his face ripped off and his body left to rot in the desert.

So no, I don't believe Sasori would agree to join Orochimaru. Though it brings an interesting question about what would happen otherwise. Would Orochimaru just go to another nation? Maybe Iwagakure. Even though Iwa did have a peace treaty with Konoha, it was only because Minato wiped out their entire army. So, it was to avoid being taken over. I'm positive they had a grudge. Maybe Kiri? It's a fun thought experiment.

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Sasori as the Fourth Kazekage

The Third Kazekage’s "mysterious" death would still be Sasori’s handiwork, except instead of disappearing with the body and vanishing from the village, he covers his tracks perfectly. He lets the Elders believe the death was an outside assassination, then steps up as the natural successor. His reputation as a brilliant tactician, unmatched weapons designer, and war hero from the Third War makes his ascension seem almost inevitable. The Kazekage to lead Sunagakure into the golden age.

With war fresh in everyone’s mind, and Suna is still licking its wounds after having to withdraw due to overextension, poor supply lines, and the heavy loss of manpower--no thanks to Sasori himself--Sasori positions himself as the only one who can guarantee those mistakes will never happen again.

Sasori would approach leadership of the village as his ultimate puppet. Every Elder, clan head, and military leader would be evaluated for "strings", leverage he can pull to keep them compliant. No one truly acts independently; he knows too much about everyone’s secrets. The Suna Council would shrink in influence. Many of them would find themselves "agreeing" with Sasori’s policies because opposing him might make them disappear.

Suna’s shinobi would lean heavily into puppetry and mechanical warfare. Sasori would push for every genin to be trained in puppet control, trap-crafting, and poisons. Instead of mining gold like Rasa, Sasori would turn Suna into the hidden world's top supplier of lethal weapons and poisons, selling them to allies and enemies under the table to finance his own personal projects. He’d focus on making Suna less dependent on imports, developing automated farming tools, water filtration systems, and puppet labourers to combat the desert’s blistering heat.

His diplomatic approach would be less about mutual trust and more about calculated intimidation. If Konoha or Iwa thought about testing Suna’s strength, they’d soon discover that Sasori wasn't as weak as the Third. He wasn't going to let them push Suna around like they did in the Third War.

Civil unrest? He’d quell it not with brute force, but with fear, sending in eerily lifelike "watcher" puppets to patrol streets, silently observing everyone. The people would never be sure which were human ANBU and which were puppets. Turning Suna into a surveillance state. The village would become efficient, secure, and feared, but also cold, paranoid, and eerily quiet. Festivals and frivolity would go extinct.

Other villages would nickname him "The Puppet King" and whisper rumours that the Fourth Kazekage is not truly alive, but a puppet himself, animated by some forbidden technique. Sasori would do nothing to dispel this myth.

If Sasori remained Kazekage long enough, Suna could rival even Konoha militarily, but it would be less of a traditional shinobi village and more of a war machine.

[reddawnmultimuse]

[ idk why, but i've dedicated this year to playing video games that were critically trashed and 100%ing them so i can judge for myself. are they trash or golden poop? my games so far and brief reviews:

dragon age: veilguard: 1/10 - fuck this game. as a dragon age fan from the very beginning that experienced it all, books included. fuck this game. they took the lore and characters and wiped their asses with it. ya know that joke in naruto that goes, "danzo did it"? yeah, the fucking elves did it. oh, and the ending. the fucking ending. the hatred i have for this game could snuff out the sun. this series is dead and buried. i fear for mass effect.

forspoken: 8/10 - i loved this game. i loved the combat. i loved the plot. it was created by the team behind ff15 (rip) and you can feel it. yes, the dialogue was very, very bad. and frey and cuff were insufferable. i had to mute dialogue to play. and the maps were WAY too large. however, i liked the plot twist and ending. and frey and cuff were better in the end. it was a solid 7/10. the dlc pushed it to a 8/10. it's a fucking shame we'll never see a sequel. i mourn this series.

anthem: 3/10 - a nothing burger. positives: flight and combat feel great. and that's it. story? garbage. characters? garbage. enemy variety? garbage (though i liked the concept of the scar). the ending? what ending? this game was so hyped up by ea for zero payoff. you can watch a review from the day anthem came out, and literally everything is still accurate. they did nothing for this game, and it shows. it's just very disappointing. a game you'll play and immediately forget about the next day.

marvel's avengers: (tba)

suicide squad: kill the justice league: (tba)

[reddawnmultimuse]

[ this concludes the draft dump. apologies to everyone's dashes. ]