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thank you aigis

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"nothing is real atoms never touch each other youve never touched anything in your life" ok. well when i pet my dog he is soft and when he licks my hand it is wet and that is far more real to me than whatevers going on at an atomic level

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You were given teeth. Use them now and use them wisely.

i liked this ask so much i made it into a sign

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I’ve been obsessed with this tweet for a while so I’m posting the it to tumblr to inflict it on more people

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There’s a serial killer in your town. Unfortunately for them you are a necromancer and you have fun driving that maniac insane.

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girl dad saves the day

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¯\_(ツ)_/¯

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Elf TV: exclusively 300 season-long soap operas

Dwarf TV: How It's Mined followed by a 4½ hr documentary about salt

Gnome TV: those sensory videos for cats where bugs and mice and birds crawl around on the screen. they really like this

Orc TV: Mythbusters and Top Gear reruns

Halfling TV: the most incredible impassioned storytelling you've ever witnessed always neatly contained in 2 seasons max

Fairy TV: imagine Impractical Jokers except theyre capable of stealing people's faces . this is the only show that fairies have

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aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

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Sushi burger.

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My terrible LLDR was saved by a familiar calming face.

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sometimes i like to just check and see if the madden giferator is still working and still bans completely random words like “destroy”

it is and it does

in case you were curious

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As an australian, this is all I know about american geography