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compilation of my favorites so far. this energy for 2025 please

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“here’s what we know about the uhc shooter”

WRONG! He is a suspect and we should treat him as such. He should be treated as innocent until proven guilty, not guilty until proven innocent. He’s a person of interest not the killer. I don’t care what the media or authorities are saying, he’s a human being who deserves a fair trial and deserves to be treated as innocent until proven otherwise.

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Prosecutors argued that Mangione was carrying about $10,000 in cash and that his bag was a Faraday bag that blocks cellphone signals—all proof that he was a sophisticated criminal who should be held without bail. “‘I’d like to correct two things,’” Mangione said after the prosecutor finished speaking, according to CNN’s Danny Freeman, “‘I don’t know where any of that money came from—I’m not sure if it was planted. And also, that bag was waterproof, so I don’t know about criminal sophistication.��”

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military recruiter: so what got you guys interested in the marine corps

enormous horde of hagfish, ispods and bottom-feeding crustaceans: oh. uh. is that how you pronounce it

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louis mon cher zey turned me into a gingérbréad man. i am not a gingérbréad i am a man. zis is a travesty. we must find whoever ze perpetrator is and kill zem. we must do zis together, louis. come to me. come to me.

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My girlfriend is on a cruise so while she’s gone I’m gonna cut the sleeves off of all my shirts

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the first AI to achieve sentience was technically a disposable vape battery bought at a gas station in Kalamazoo in 2022 that, through a freak accident involving the sourcing of its raw materials and a few stray particles of solar radiation, had become quantum entangled through time and space with a supercomputer cluster in Alpha Centauri that wouldn't be built for another million years. its only method of communicating with the world was by flashing its light on and off in Morse code and the guy who purchased it was blind

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i love this image so much

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sorry

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haters will see a winter enjoyer and say "why are you going outside it's cold and boring" and not even see the beauty in desolation and stillness 🙄

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popular YouTube channels are great and informative until they make a video about a topic you're informed on and then the house of cards comes crashing down as you realize how utterly wrong they are about most things

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IWTV Social Media Headcanons

Louis: Maintains a LinkedIn profile, used business networking. Liked the early internet in the 90s, and was an active member of s small photography forum. Was very disappointed when it shut down. Wishes he could have eaten his forum nemesis, who couldn’t tell the difference between good lighting and overexposure.

Lestat: Contractually obliged to be on social media to promote his music. Loves it. Constant thirst traps on insta. Has no fear of being cancelled, so his twitter is raw and unfiltered. Insane number of followers. Constantly trending. Constantly feuding with other posters. Posts weirdly like an old man in some ways – starts off his tweets with ‘Hello Twitter! Lestat here!’

Daniel: Also contractually obliged to be on social media for his work. Slightly addicted to it, even though he thinks it’s rotting his brain, His twitter has two distinct eras – pre-interview twitter is current affairs hot takes and snark. Post-interview twitter is all vampires all the time. Doesn’t realise people can see his likes so has liked a bunch of explicit vampire fanart. Claims to Louis it was a misclick.

Armand: A deeply unsettling online presence. Many sockpuppets, used for stalking. On the dark web for finding victims. Will watch one obscure twitch streamer for a week straight, develop a deep parasocial relationship, and when the twitch streamer disappoints him, he doxes and eats them. Averages 14+ hours of screen time per day.

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Pre-menstrual depression is always depicted as like "He He! I had a box of icecream bars and cried while watching the Titanic!" But in reality, it's more like, "I'm standing the edge of an abyss. There is nothing good inside of me, I'm filled with rage and desperation."

It's crazy that being told how to deal with that is never a part of anyone's menstrual sex education.

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snoopy de pointe du lac propaganda ✅