quinndelion

[quinndelion]

Babe, when are you going to return to Tumblr?

today i suppose

[quinndelion]

Hello babe, hope you log back on one day!! <3

your wish is my command <3

[quinndelion]

2023 was a lot.

I can't say I learned anything I didn't already know. I think it was just filled with a lot of disapointment really, and that's sort of the thing that comes with life. That's nothing new. I don't think I was wishing for anything in particular this year. Or maybe I was and I've just forgotten it now. I lose all of my memories to time. I think maybe in 2024 I should start to write my memories down in a notebook or something so I don't continue this cycle I have of forgetting everything that's happened to me.

I started this year in the hospital because I had lost all of my will to live. I seriously think I went insane or something because I went from having something to nothing and apparently nothing was too much but also not enough. If I think back really hard I can remember the food I ate when I was there. I would have the same exact thing every single day. A cheese pizza (it always came in a circle form with it cut into 4s) with extra parmasan, kraft mac and cheese and mashed potato on the side. Sometimes I'd have fruit punch or apple juice or lemonade. On the very last day I got sick of it and got a buger instead, and I only ate a few bites before I had to leave. I met a lot of people there. Some older than me, some younger, all with stories I had never heard. None of us had really wanted to be there, but I can recall so many times where we laughed. We wanted so badly to stay up past curfew and talk to eachother, so we just sat by the doors with our pillows to cheat out way out of it. I was room 13. We could change the color of our room lights. The boy next to me, his lights were always green, and he had been there so long he had pictures of his family on the wall, and album covers he had gotten printed out. My room was a complete mess. My lights were always off. We would sit by the window and look at all the cars below with people, and wonder when it would be us in those cars, leaving that place, becoming normal people again. Then we'd go to bed.

I remember thinking when I left, "I will never see any of you people again." It was sort of painful and relieving at the same time. I think about the boy, in the room next to mine, the most. He changed my vocabulary. His story changed my life. I wonder if he ever made it out of there. I wonder if he remembers the signs I taught him. I will never see him again. I will never see him again.

I got out of the hospital 2 weeks later. I went back to school. I did everything the same as I always did. I never told anyone where I had been. I never told anyone about room 13. I think this is the first time I've ever told anyone about what it was like. It doesn't really feel like anything. I guess it's nice to know that if I ever forget what it's like, it'll be here, written in a tumblr post.

I think I want to thank Mark and Kyon especially, because admitedly drawing comics really helped me through a lot of tough things I went through this year. I don't think they understood the gravity of how much it meant to me. I always got the notion that because I am so passionate and I get super into things that people think I'm odd or strange, but they never made me feel like I was odd or strange. It's why I had the confidence to continue doing fan art, or to give my opinion on things, even if I thought it was embarrasing. I'm really thankful for them, and I hope they have a great new year.

I'd like to leave everything that happened to me this year behind. I don't want to forget it, and I don't want it to disappear, but I want it to stay here where it happened, so I can truly and authenthically move on. My last piece for 2023 was a simple drawing of myself holding a sparkler. It's simple. This year I started out with no spark, and now I have one.

In 2024 I'd like to choose love.

[quinndelion]

are you ever coming back to Tumblr?

i honestly didnt think anyone remembered this blog. i sure as hell didnt. honestly i only used to use this blog for personal me stuff. all the art here is self indulgent and cringe because thats me HAHA

I still use tumblr anonie! I just have a fandom sideblog now that I keep secret lmaoo but I don't know. Maybe I'll start posting my songs and rants and oc x canon stuff here again. Not like a million people follow me here or anything.

thanks for the ask <3

[quinndelion]

what I wanna see more in media r painfully average people being lgbt, let the 40 year old school janitor be trans, let the grandpa who just sits on his porch be bi, let the girl who's on her way to an office job be lesbian, let the guy who's at the same bus stop everyday be nonbinary, and so on and so forth, idk I don't know why people always expect lgbt ppl to be this alt fashion teen/young adult and stuff when sometimes it's literally just some guy

[quinndelion]

Bite :]

Meow! :D

[quinndelion]

of course i love the support but at the same time why are you Perceiving me. that’s not supposed to happen

it's still so incredibly disorienting whenever one of my friends finds my social media. i mean yeah i don't prioritize making it a secret and i have the same username everywhere but at the same time it's like jesus oh my god hi yes i have a tumblr now do not touch it go AWAY

[quinndelion]

it's still so incredibly disorienting whenever one of my friends finds my social media. i mean yeah i don't prioritize making it a secret and i have the same username everywhere but at the same time it's like jesus oh my god hi yes i have a tumblr now do not touch it go AWAY

[quinndelion]

It’s my 6 year anniversary for YouTube :]

[quinndelion]

its important to me as a detrans woman to be vocal about it. its important to me as a detrans woman who initially only had radfems to talk to about detransition, because i couldnt find a single trans inclusive detrans person for over a year, to make sure other people know they have options.

radfems arent your aly if you're questioning your gender. they dont have your best interest at heart. they dont care about helping you explore who you are, theyre only interested in sucking you in to be another transmisogynistic pawn for their violent ideology.

if you're trans/nonbinary now, but are wondering if it isnt right for you, know that you have options. you can talk to me. there are people who have not done a 180 into bigotry who are here to support you.

please reblog, do not just like, this post.

i dont have a large platform. i want this to get spread. i want to remove terfs from the forefront of detrans/reidentification awareness & support. they cannot continue to be the first contact for questioning people.

i am begging you, yes you personally, to please reblog this, and comment or reply in the tags if you're a safe, trans-inclusive detransitioned or reidentified person to approach.

[quinndelion]

one time when i was nine someone told me to please shut up and i’ve never been the same since 

[quinndelion]

Hello dearest darling the one and only Quinn Quinndelion I'm here to tell you how awesome and amazing you are cause you don't hear it enough

You are so so awesome and nice and sweet and such a kind soul you are genuinely one of the nicest people I know and I hope i get to be friends with you forever and ever because you are just so sweet !! You are also very pretty and just very very wonderful and i thought you should know that

Genuinely I say it every single day I put it in my videos and my statuses and shit and there just aren't enough words to explain how much I love my fucking friends like it's so incredibly unreal. It's the shit like this and the "I love you's," and the thinking of me and the "Quinn I found this yellow nail polish it reminds me of you," and the little doodles and sketches and the support whenever I upload god it all makes me want to cry I will never be able to thank you enough for showing me so much kindness every single fucking day. I wish I could be more soft spoken when I convey my affection but I don't know how to put it any other way than I fucking love you. Thank you for loving me, thank you for supporting me, thank you for talking to me, thank you for the compliments, thank you for dealing with the ramblings at one in the morning and the hardcore hyperinterest spam and the stubbornness and the stupid shit I say and do because at the end of the day you stay and that means more to me than anything, seriously. Thank you. I wish I could say so much more. Not enough words in the dictionary and not enough languages to properly express how much love I have for friends old and new and beyond. I know I'm a bit much sometimes, believe me I feel it too, but it's shit like this that reminds me that there are people out there I can give unconditional love and support to. This is a prime fucking example. I love you to the moon and back and a million times more than that. Still not enough words, haha <3

[quinndelion]

Dude I cannot wait to get top surgery it’s gonna be so awesome I’m never gonna have to worry about binding ever again oh my goodness

[quinndelion]

The George drawing from my newest video, and a Dream one as well because I felt like sharing :]

[quinndelion]

It’s not like I want to undermine my skill. I know how to edit and I can draw. I think I could do YouTube if I really commit and I really tried, which I do! As much as I can with an F in algebra, haha. I don’t know, I just see all these people with explosive personalities and the skill to weave any situation into such an interesting story, people my age who do such cool things that I wonder if I truly have it in me to do that full time. To keep people interested, because at the day, that’s what it’s all about, right? I don’t know! I don’t know anything! I’m 15! What the fuck do 15 year olds know! Jack shit!! I just want to do good. 

[quinndelion]

hey friends, i made a uquiz! what season are you?

there are 8 different results all with positive descriptions!

*disclaimer: i'm from america so these mainly describe northern hemisphere seasons and how I experience them, but i hope that doesn’t take away your enjoyment of this quiz!

[quinndelion]

“Don’t let anyone convince you that something you genuinely enjoy is weird. Because they are weird for caring so much about what you enjoy.”

— Dream (the youtuber)