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Texts From Superheroes

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coworker: hey you should come look at the results of a ph test for a customer’s water

me: I’m king of busy rn

coworker: no really just come here

the ph test:

my honest reaction:

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imagine if your boyfriend was like I can smell an ant. and started tracking

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Shout out to people with auditory processing disorder!!!

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Bruce: ...Why do you have a fake ID??

Robin!Jason, sweating: I-I can explain-

Dick: He used it to get a second library card so he could take twice as many books at once.

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Robin!Jason: I hope something good happens!

Years later

Red Hood!Jason: I hope whatever bad thing happens next is at least funny.

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If there are trees you aren’t alone

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Star sapphire Jay wouldn't stop wearing his armor just because he has the ring. The other lanterns constantly make fun of him for taking longer to get ready than the rest of them until his ring runs out and he hits the ground shooting because he's fully masked and geared underneath that lantern suit.

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One of the reasons I like Star Sapphire Jason Todd so much is because it's the classic magical girl trope of "he's gonna fight with the power of love" except the power of love is giving him a machine gun. It's trapping his enemies into airtight bubbles. It's shaping into a chain he's wrapping around you and flinging you around with like a flail. "You gonna kill me with the power of love and sparkling pink, buddy?" why yes. Yes he is.

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more cishet people should crossdress. builds a vibrant ecosystem

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Dick: The real reason Howl kept his castle moving was tax evasion.

Jason: This sounds like a joke but I read the book. This is the literal reason.

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"Haha everything in Australia is trying to kill you" NOPE WE'RE NOT DOING THAT. You will romanticise our flora and fauna or you will shut up. You will marvel in the beauty of our red desert sand, you will delight in the smell of our eucalyptus trees, you will laugh with frivolity at the dances of our frill necked lizards and hear the musicality of the calls of our kookaburras and our magpies. You will unlearn the colonial narrative that this land is savage and deadly, and you will see it for the majesty it is.

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r/selfhelp: Got the divine alchemy of the self confused with actual alchemy, accidentally turned my dick to gold. What do I do?

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Honestly, having grown up in the (genocidal, awful) state of israel, Sara Netanyahu specifically is, like, particularly infamous for being an insane karen

Like, you don’t even understand how much

The stuff in this post is one of her *less* unhinged outbursts

She’s gone viral in Palestine numerous times with recordings of her insane outbursts. Some of her outbursts are long-time memes at this point.

If this is, like, the first time you’re hearing about Sara Netanyahu. i promise you, whatever’s your opinion about her after having read this post, she’s worse than that. Much worse.

least vain israeli

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fujoshi dog