puppylovebites

[puppylovebites]

wrong

wrong

that word

what is that word

it's so cliche

didn't you see it?

can't we just laugh about this in a couple years

i hate this feeling

So fleeting

[puppylovebites]

TUMLBR POSTED MY FAVORITE DRAFT??? IM ////// MYSELF IM HAVING A HEART ATTACK GENUINELY

[puppylovebites]

Tumblr deleted my favorite draft I'm crashing out

[puppylovebites]

Roly-poly bugs curl up nice and small

And their hearts are so big

Why can't they stick with a colony?

Why must they turn down invitations to the hive?

They wouldn't have to hide

So curled up

But they love how fresh the dirt is in their habitat

So they'll curl up and hide

When dangers comes

[puppylovebites]

Do you understand?

I'm not her

This cycle repeats again

Tug-o-war

Back and forth

Merry-go-round

I'm letting go of the rope

But this is how I win

This is how we win, ☁️

This is what she wanted

But she's not here to see it, not anymore

She lost

That's how the game is played

[puppylovebites]

a cherry comes with two on a stem

frequently bought together

a set

do not separate

salt and pepper

your spice stings and my salt burns

paprika and cayenne

north and south pole

polar bears and penguins

anemone and clownfish

i mention you in every sentence

i know they're getting tired of it

i'm a broken record of experiences

if i were them, i'd get annoyed

if i were me, too

where did i go

now that you've consumed me

i don't know if i miss me

i was sad

i had to be in everyone's thoughts and prayers

so i could be in everyone's thoughts

it's so strange to forget how that felt

when it was all i was and all i thought i'd ever be

"i have to accept that i am sui•idal, i always will be"

no, actually, i won't.

it's been eight months

and i've been completely fine

maybe because of me. maybe because of you. maybe because of being on the right meds, who's to say?

it's also been ## days

like tug-o-war

what does that mean?

i needed to

but it's not the same feeling as before

i just wanted to control the sickness with something lighter

and I'm feeling better.

[puppylovebites]

What’s in a bond 

Glue and time

For the glue to dry

I could know you for years and never really know you at all

I could know you for a day and know you like myself

So what’s in a bond

Some birds mate for life

Some move on as quick as the wind

Do I know you as a swan

Or a common house finch

Or a mourning dove

When you fly south for the winter 

Will I love you in the spring 

[puppylovebites]

You are nestled in a place between my ribs

In-between my lungs

Underneath my heart

Warm and fragile

I'll store you there until it's safe

You compress my ribs

Steal my air

Damage my heart

Only because I've nestled you there

Only because you were raised a certain way

I close my eyes

And continue walking

[puppylovebites]

When you spend months trying to shove the item back into it's box

You find yourself missing it

Once it's already shipped

Returned at the post office

So you make your own

You play pretend.

Sometimes it's still there

A glint in your eye

A smile on your lips

Sometimes the stitching tears and the glue peels away and it all crumbles down

More oftentimes

Most of the times

And you find yourself putting that back into a box too

And relearning who you are this year

After shipping away the last

Hopefully you like it better now

Because you can't return to the past

You stop trying

You'll order a new item soon enough

That's how this works

That's how you live

That's how you die

[puppylovebites]

I know, you don't let yourself believe in anything for too long

Denial is the first stage, but you never really get to acceptance.

Because you're never 100% sure

You hate lying yet you lie to yourself

But you're right. There isn't anything worse

Than being wrong.

You do make assumptions though, you just never believe them.

I think that maybe believing that you can't be loved is wrong.

Poetry needs to be vague, or maybe I do. That subtley lets me say what I need without you really hearing it.

Because, I need this ambiguity to stay.

I'm sorry, but there needs to be doubt.

I do tell you though, when those words are meant for you. If you're unsure, then are they really yours? So whose words are you misinterpreting? Which feeling have you intercepted as your own?

Hope. Is there hope? Does that hurt? It hurt. And then I fixed it. Do you know how to fix this? You won't make this mistake again

[puppylovebites]

the words on my hand overlap

piled one on top of the other

little reminders of what to do

i accidentally wash them off

so i keep writing on top

scrawling my list of chores

the ink takes over my arm until only specks of skin are left

it seeps into my skin

each addition only contributing to the poisoning

and i can't stop

because how long do we have?

every minute has to be filled

because i only exist when perceived

my own mind forgets me

i am safest near you

no, not you

anyone

but the ink grows

and i will soon be nothing but a glob of it

[puppylovebites]

Two bros jamming in a bathtub

(with a lil process gif)

Keep reading

[puppylovebites]

me waiting (im)patiently for tumlbr to notify me that my bestie has posted more ramblings/poetry (I need to EAT where is my food)

me waiting patiently for tumblr to notify my bestie that I've posted more ramblings (it's been like 4 days she's a fake fan)

[puppylovebites]

I've been clawing at empty glass for longer than you'd think

Sometimes, when the light shines right,

I see specks of dust inside

So I claw some more

I pry open the lid

Only to find nothing

Trick of the light

I close the jar

And then I claw

And I claw and I claw and I claw

I hold the jar to the light

Hoping to see that trick once more

I don't care if it's not real

I will claw my way to you

And I will hold you to the light

[puppylovebites]

"The blood on my hands can be mistaken for yours if I hold you tight enough" Okay in this essay I will explain what this means. Wait the melatonin is hitting zzzzzzzz......

Okay when I read this I Lowkey wish I wrote it differently. It kinda sounds like the blood on narrators hands is "you"s blood but actually I meant it like "I can frame you for this crime if I'm close to you" like external judgement will see the blood on "you" and decide that "you" committed a crime. even though the blood has only rubbed off from narrator holding "you" so tightly. because they are close. i think it would be cool to explore the themes of "the blood from my hands will be mistaken for yours if I keep holding you this tightly" as in external judgement believes narrator guilty of hurting "you" when actually narrator is hurt??? like some type of codependent situation like a metaphor for loving someone too much and holding onto them so tight that both parties end up hurt. BUT I'M RAMBLING! In the original sense, it's supposed to mean "I have committed this horrible crime, but if I hold onto you then external judgement will think you did it." Or in more realistic terms "external judgement will see your crime and overlook mine." and playing off the other lines, narrator seems to believe their crimes to be of a much higher caliber with "Whatever evil you've committed I've done tenfold" so that need to cover it up is there. In terms of why I personally wrote it, I was feeling evil 😈 !!!! And was being dramatic. and felt like I could be absolved of my guilt because the spotlight was on "you." and the fear of external judgement stopped being there because they've already exhiled us for your perceived crime (which really was nothing.) I'm half asleep on melatonin so this doesn't make sense.

[puppylovebites]

me waiting patiently for tumblr to notify my bestie that I've posted more ramblings (it's been like 4 days she's a fake fan)

[puppylovebites]

old poems I'll never post/finish because they're embarrassing/unfinished