pumbaya

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coupons used to mean something now deals are like HURRY NOW! get 3 free napkins when you spend $75+ 😋

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Guy who goes "yeah, I can see where this is going" and closes the porn tab

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they want you to make fried rice

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three different people on my post about installing a trashcan outside my house have now complained that people SHOULD be holding onto their trash instead of just tossing it in random people's yards ("it's not that hard!"). like... good for you; do you want a fucking prize? we could engrave a nice little "congratulations on missing the point!" placard for it and everything.

meanwhile, my yard continues to not have beer bottles in it anymore.

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Fish bio on tinder:

I ❤️ nutrients, shiny objects and i am 5 minutes old

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Would you rather $1 million or a disgusting old penny

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I hate how people will look at popular indie artists who had one or two songs go viral on TikTok and start making fun of anybody who listens to them. "Oh you listen to Lemon Demon, Will Wood, Jack Stauber, Glass Animals, and Mother Mother? Tsk, don't you know that is stupid TikTok neurodivergent white transmasc preteen music? It's so mid and bad you should listen to real music–" you are a pit of misery

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the author's barely disguised hobbies and interests

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"your friends are an echo chamber" heyyyyy hey. hey. lock your phone right now and put it down. and walk until you get to the shore and then enter the body of water you encounter and stay in it till youre clean and whole with the world again

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let the contemporary record show mr beast was pretty ignorable for his whole career if you were just like, busy.

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imagine how much more fucked up the history of the world would be if eating someone's brains reliably conferred on you their memory and knowledge

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i am going to freak out! and not in a way anyone finds endearing or relatable

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good evening to perverts only. everyone else log off

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probably the biggest hacktivism news of the last few months

im excited to do some reporting based on the data coming out of this leak, i already have a few interesting angles i will be taking a look at this from

disclaimer: please read the article, i had no involvement in this hack (though i knew about it early as i helped some journalists in the background) i am posting this here to spread the news. this disclaimer is unfortunately necessary because people on here always assume ive done every hack i talk about.

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