psychic-winged-turtle

[psychic-winged-turtle]

[psychic-winged-turtle]

I love butter!!!! I love salt!!! :D

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[psychic-winged-turtle]

Happy belated Wilford day, gamers <3

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can you please be gay somewhere else i’m tryna play 2048

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MY TA SHOT SOMEONE IN THE FOOT AND THE PROFESSOR WAS SO FUCKING QUICK LMAOOO

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RULE NO. 1 OF WOUND CARE: ignore itttt :33

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Mark making live chat members only cause no one will shut up about mpreg is absolutely peak and not what I was expecting today but we roll

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You, the queen of a fairy tale kingdom, got cursed to give birth to a princess who’s going to live her life isolated in a tower the first 20 years of her life. Narrate how you avoid your daughter’s fate.

[psychic-winged-turtle]

just found out that stoats hunt twice the size of them like rabbits by aggressively and eccentrically dancing around it with their little slinky rigatoni bodies so it can confuse the absolute fuck out of its prey until it can get close enough to jump on its back like some shadow of the colossus shit and take it down

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so we just moved, and the house we moved into has been abandoned for a few years so weve discovered some fun little secrets scattered around as we explored. for example, theres a little room downstairs with graffiti on the door dubbing it 'the dog box'

of course we were intrigued. aside from some storage and a place to put a washing machine, the dog box seems to exclusively contain this old ass piano, with a little window to see into it from outside

also pictured sitting on the piano is a little novelty dagger we found in the grass outside. its all very funny and novel, right? we thought so

that was when we found The Stain

of course, we immediately jumped to some conclusions. the knife outside, the abandoned house, 'do not enter' written on the door. whatever it was, it had dripped through the floorboards from upstairs, from approximately just outside the bathroom. we decided to wait until we finished moving and then grab some peroxide to test it just in case

still, the dog box bloodstain remained a hot topic, and the curiosity was killing me. after figuring out where upstairs the stain wouldve dripped down from, we noticed it had also seeped up through the newly installed flooring, and i decided i couldnt wait to investigate

looking around the dog box, i noticed that there was a section of the ceiling/underfloor that was noticeably newer than the rest of it, meaning the place the stain had leaked through had been pulled out and replaced just before we moved in. suspicious

im using my phone torch to look around in the dark, and when i shine it on the bloodstain it lights up in a distinctly.... glossy way. when i get closer i can see its not matte, but sticky. so i decide to touch it, and immediately im hit with a STRONG smell of something deeply familiar. all the pieces fall together at once, and using my superior investigative prowess i have deduced the culprit

it was bees. there was a fuckoff massive beehive in the floor that got taken out before we moved in and it leaked honey up through the floorboards and onto the floor of the dog box and the landlord didnt feel like cleaning it up. mystery solved

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[psychic-winged-turtle]

I got a laptop with Windows 11 for an IT course so I can get certified, and doing the first time device set-up for it made me want to commit unspeakable violence

Windows 11 should not exist, no one should use it for any reason, it puts ads in the file explorer and has made it so file searches are also web searches and this cannot be turned off except through registry editing. Whoever is responsible for those decisions should be killed, full stop.

Switch to linux, it's free and it's good.

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[psychic-winged-turtle]

reblog if you remember what it felt like to walk into blockbuster

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