probablyaraccoon

[probablyaraccoon]

i made rolls and mashed potatoes for dinner and they were really good.

[probablyaraccoon]

"Odysseus gets around" XD

[probablyaraccoon]

Got inspired from this

[probablyaraccoon]

spirk except I have art block and dont like drawing kissing so they’re sock puppets

[probablyaraccoon]

Bruce: Just heard Dick two aisles over go “Hey, I think this is that special glass that doesn’t shatter when you drop it” followed by the sound of shattering glass. I’ve decided that when the employees come looking for his guardian I’m gonna pretend I don’t know him

[probablyaraccoon]

Supportive parent Bruce Wayne

Damian showing him all his artwork because he knows that he will get the brightest smile and a “That looks beautiful sweetheart” every time

Dick being so excited to bring his dad to his gymnastics show because he knows that Bruce will start crying every time he lands a trick, without fail, and that means the women that come to watch will have someone else to fuss over

Someone at WE mentioning they don’t trust Tim because of his age and Bruce immediately scheduling a company wide meeting so he can express just how exceptional his son is. Tim’s face is the most red it has ever been the entire time

Cass doesn’t even have to do anything, he is just always looking at her with a fond little smile and on the verge of tears but sometimes, when she wants a little more then normal, she will take one of Jason’s books and read as much as she can aloud. That man absolutely loses it and hugs her as tight as he can while sobbing about how far his baby has come

Jason acts like he could care less about Bruce’s support, but the first time he overhears Bruce talking about him at a gala, telling some rich idiot who was questioning business decisions that Jason is the most competent man he has ever known and would trust him with not only the WE weapons department but his life, Jason pointedly does not look at Dick, who has a shit eating grin on his face, and walks as fast as he can to the bathroom

The best part is that Bruce doesnt even have to try he is just genuinely that proud of them

[probablyaraccoon]

The best part about DC canon being a sandbox is that you can combine different parts of different timelines into your Frankenstein ideal just to give Bruce Wayne more gray hairs

Observe

Bruce: Dick you know you’re 26 you can’t keep working as a gymnastics instructor on a volunteer basis you need a career.

Dick who has been working as a lawyer in nyc for 3 years now: hmmm yeah you’re totally right B maybe I’ll take some classes

Bruce: Tim you need to get your GED, I cannot allow you to give up on education at highschool.

Tim who got into ivy university and has been zeta-ing back and forth: …hmmm maybe I’m kinda busy

Bruce: I have no idea what Jason does in the day

Jason catholic priest Todd: … yeah I got nothing

-this shitpost was brought to you solely to remind everyone that JASON TODD WAS A CATHOLIC PRIEST IN ANOTHER DIMENSION THANK YOU

[probablyaraccoon]

never had it before

[probablyaraccoon]

Joker dies bcs during his big dramatic speech of the day he tries to be be all insane and funny by pretending to shoot himself in the head with his BANG! flag gun but he fucks up getting distracted by flirting with Batman and mixes up his guns and he shoots himself in the face in front of the bats. Jason, who was being bodily held back from shooting him himself by Bruce and Dick for the past 15 minutes, laughs so hard he fractures a rib and has to be carried back to the batmobile

[probablyaraccoon]

fave character expressions series compilation

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Jon: Oh, oh! I-I-I think I'm having... ah, what do you call it? A headache with pictures?

Damian: An idea?

[probablyaraccoon]

I definitely feel like Jason can cry on cue and it’s so damn realistic it’s Oscar worthy. He did it all the time as Robin, and it worked phenomenally on Bruce even when he knew most time it was ruse. Not so much Alfred after he figured out his little trick and would publish him w/ chores for it. Eventually he grew out of it, but he still could do it on command. So imagine years after his death and resurrection, he just pulls out all the stops when he wants to manipulate his siblings into doing something for him. They are instantly stunned when this 6’5 boulder of a man eyes begin to water and his knees buckle as he’s begging them to help him. He could ask them to commit literal crimes against humanity and you better believe they are rushing and throwing all morals out the window to get Jason to stop crying.

[probablyaraccoon]

Let me introduce you to this concept: batkids pick a silly t-shirt of the week, in which Brucie will be “accidentally” caught by the paparazzi.

Dick, as a millennial he is, chooses something with mottos like yolo or jokes about coffee. He also has a special love for quotes and puns, which nobody but him finds funny.

Jason does not participate, because he refuses to think about Bruce more than it’s absolutely necessary. And if some t-shirt reminds him of his dad Bruce, well, he just passes by.

Barbara, although she has a wonderful sense of humour, uses her power to spread awareness instead. When an important social or political event takes place in Gotham and beyond its chapels, the choice is hers.

Cass loves matching t-shirts, because it makes her feel that she belongs. Every time it's her turn to pick, newspapers spread out the touching headlines like “Bruce Wayne was caught with his daughter in I'm with stupid t-shirts”.

Steph simply goes to the women's department and chooses one of those ugly Eiffel Tower or a rhinestone “princess” t-shirt. They're also usually pretty tight, and, trust me, the press just loves it.

Tim wake up and choose violence Drake prints t-shirts himself, always putting some brainrot words on them. That's how “what a sigma” and “skibidi toilet rizzler” appeared in Bruce's wardrobe.

Damian takes great pride in his t-shirts, because he draws pictures on them by hand. Nobody could convince him that it's not, in fact, a competition, and he has to make sure that he is winning.

Duke always gives Bruce some niche band t-shirts. Plot twist? These bands do not exist. He just creates them himself and then proceeds to gaslight people, because “what do you mean you don't know batshit on the rooftop? You, uncultured pig! Their music literally changed my life!”.

[probablyaraccoon]

imagine ody acting like a dad to the younger crewmates

LOOK AT THAT PERFECT ✨️DAD SIT✨️

abracadabra there's a part two-a

[probablyaraccoon]

[probablyaraccoon]

Tim: Ah yes, that time Ra's send his sister to rape me

Damian: My grandfather did what?

Cass: Oh yes, I remember that.

Damian: WHAT?

[probablyaraccoon]

I just wanna say that ur Apollo and Hermes gives off the song Tongue Tied by GROUPLOVE. They have that vibe /pos

I thought I didn't know the song until I searched it up and yeah. Yeah that checks. The vibe is very good.

Doodle of them while I was listening to the song :3