pointlessbanter

[pointlessbanter]

Time Keeps Flowing

Salutations,

I am mostly checking in to prove that I have not given up on this venture. Life has just begun to unfold rather tumultuously lately as the holidays approach. I find myself reflecting a lot and I am left with a decision that is so simple to make yet the thought of everything that decision entails paralyzes me with indecision.

 Until next time friend,

pointlessbanter

[pointlessbanter]

Life is a storm, my young friend. You will bask in the sunlight one moment, be shattered on the rocks the next. What makes you a man is what you do when that storm comes. You must look into that storm and shout as you did in Rome. Do your worst, for I will do mine! Then the fates will know you as we know you”

Alexandre Dumas: The Count of Monte Cristo

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Life, Stormy says, is not about how fast you run or even with what degree of grace. It's about perseverance, about staying on your feet and slogging forward no matter what.

Dean Koontz (Odd Thomas)

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Sentimentality

I have a hard time letting some things go. Many may find the things I choose to carry through life with me, silly, or even a little odd, but my brain relies heavily on associations. These little treasure have the power to grip me by the collar and pull me straight back into the torrid whirlwinds of the intense emotion of a singular moment. Whether the associated memory encourages a good or bad response is something I have become a lot better at being aware of. I have learned to ask myself if these reminders are pushing me toward my highest good or enabling me to dig up old wounds. I have examples of things like this everywhere. On the cork board in my bedroom that I have mounted on the north facing wall, lies pinned in the upper right corner, a small piece of previously folded paper, displaying the number five. It was the number i pulled when deciding the order in which our rag tag group of scorned poets and equally distressed scholars would perform their pieces for the Halloween Poetry Slam. It was hosted in a cozy coffee shop; a stage hidden in the very back of the store. This one small slip of paper (at least I feel) was the first step to knowing myself. Thus far, aside from going off to college in another state, this was the bravest thing I felt I had ever done. Perhaps i can write a short story on the whole experience. Every time I see that number I can feel my heart race, the cold winter wind on my face, the confidence I felt walking home that night welling up inside, the feeling that if I could do that I could do anything. Maybe I just have a habit of romanticizing my life, but honestly if I can use things like this to keep me running toward my goals, why not? What are some things that you carry through life with you to remind yourself of your own personal victories?

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Class is in Session

Hello again fellow homosapien, (and perhaps other sapiens?)

Cheers to another B session of online school.

Much can be interpreted from that statement, but I actually am finding myself, a little excited. I have recently felt a new fire stirring in my belly, an almost overwhelming desire to buckle down and get back to work. I hope to foster this ambition, but I am also aware the attitude is fleeting. Well, we will see what happens. I hope you wish me luck with my endeavors as I wish you with yours.

Until next time,

pointlessbanter

[pointlessbanter]

An Introduction

Hello cohabitants of this terrestrial plane,

I thought the best place to begin would probably be with some sort of introduction. Is it odd that I feel vain in describing myself? I will attempt to write in such detail that you get an accurate picture of who I am without me having to share my face or “real” name. I wish to be perceived through my words alone, for now. Well without further adieu, this is who I am and why I decided to start this.

I am a 20 year old, Latinx, engineering student, who was born and raised in the desert of Southern California. Growing up wasn’t great and going off to college didn’t prove to be any easier, (especially in another state) although it was hard in a different way. Three years ago I never could’ve imagined that I would have ended up where I am today.

Writing is a medium that I have always been fond of using to express myself and I am finally at the point in my journey that I am willing to make time for it. I am not the greatest with grammar or proper punctuation though so you will have to bare with me. This is a learning process for me, which brings me to why I decided to start this...

When I went off to college I told myself that I wanted to have drafted my first book by the time I graduated. Well, I changed my major, and the pandemic hit, so now with my STEM major I definitely have time to start working toward my goal. Something I realized though is that I can’t just go from no writing to, writing all the time. It just doesn’t work for me. So here I am starting another thing that I have always wanted to do, a blog. 

Here I will be sharing bits and pieces of my life, my thoughts, my opinions, etc. I may share a short story or two as I start writing more and especially when pitching the book. When I am feeling particularly melodramatic you may find a few sad poems or some blatantly forlorn prose sprinkled around. As time goes on perhaps I will expand on the mediums through which I share myself with you, but here we are for now. 

I hope you’ll stick around and read along because as someone I love once told me, “I feel as though I could write/speak forever in an attempt to understand and to be understood.”.

Just putting it out there,

pointlessbanter