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Not Porn For Once

Up until the age i was 13, i lived with my bio father and my grandparents. My mom and dad split when i was 1, so i never knew them being together so it was never a big deal to not have both of them. Well, i guess i cant say it wasnt a big deal. I was always a huge mommas girl. Everyday after school, i would have hours of long conversations with her talking to her about every detail of my day. Just telling her about recess and the playground drama, how the boys would bully me and how id retaliate and kick them in their shins. Just every single detail.

At school, I was someone who didnt put up with shit, almost a bully while being bullied and a hyper perky girl who just seemed so full of life.It was almost crazy to think that my at home life was such a horrible situation. Thinking back on it now, i didnt have those usual signs of having a bad at home situation. Usually you look for the quiet kid, who doesnt seem clean or clothes that are too small or seem raggy or just a child who seems as if they didnt make friends easily. I was the opposite of all those things. I always had brand new clothes, the newest shoes, had SO many friends and wasnt quiet at all, i made amazing grades and LOVED to help the teachers with anything i was allowed. Its crazy to think there was ever anything wrong.

When id come home, no one would be home. Just my little brother and i. We knew immediately to do our homework, we knew we had to clean anything and everything so the house was spotless, we knew NOT to leave the house or have any friends over, we knew not to use the phone or call anyone(id have to wait to talk to my mom until someone came home to listen). If anything wasnt done the way we knew it was supposed to get done, we would get beat and yelled at. If we didnt sweep the kitchen, we were lazy and useless and got beat. They’d check the caller ID to make sure that the phone wasnt used and if it was, we were being horrible children and talking to strangers. Friends couldnt come over because they didnt want strangers in the house nor could we leave because every single person was out to kill us. I wasnt allowed to speak to any boy in any manner.

I particularly remember one time a guy friend of mine somehow got my house phone number and called while my grandpa was home. I was maybe 9 at that point. My grandfather answered, screamed at my friend to never call again and that i wouldnt be allowed to come to the phone ever. When the beep of the end button was pressed, I knew i was next. “Why are you giving our house phone number out to strangers?” “ How many boyfriends do you have?” “Why are you being such a whore?” “You’re going to be nothing when you grow up?” “Is your dream in life to become a baby maker and stay home all day and be a fat lazy whore?” “ You must be known at school as a whore.” I couldnt say anything back, i wasnt allowed to say anything back. When i told him i didnt know how my friend got the number, i was smacked and told i was lying. i was always called the liar. i never told the truth. i was always the whore. i was always going to be the kid who got pregnant at 16, and never would amount to anything.

Im turning 24 this year and yet moments in my life like this still ring in my head as if it happened the other day.

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it’s weird to cuddle with someone you love… it’s like no matter what position you’re in, you can’t seem to get close enough.

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By FDASuarez

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i treat people how i want to be treated until i notice a lack of reciprocity

then i begin to treat them how they treat me

and that’s when people usually notice that there’s a problem

“you acting different”

yeah

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why do people say “don’t be a pussy” when talking about weakness more like “don’t be a man’s ego” because you know there isn’t nothing more fragile than that

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By Dreamshots

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i love Legally Blonde so much. all of the women are so supportive of each other im??

when Elle was supposed to get engaged, none of the girls were jealous, they were genuinely happy for her n helped her get ready for the big dinner

when her bf broke up with her they were supportive

when Elle says she wants to go to harvard the counselor lady is like but ur major is fashion, do u have any backup plan? n elle is like nope im going to harvard n the lady is like okay then here’s what u gotta do.

her friends didnt get why she wanted to go to law school but supported her anyway, and helped her study

when she got 179 on her exam (more than her goal), they treated her like a queen

and that’s only in the first 18 minutes of the movie

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Sources: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

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What a good boy. (via meriah_j)

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we opened at 11 this morning. i watched an old man literally pry the fucking sliding doors open at 10:43 and stand there just staring into the empty store and my coworker & i were like sir. for the love of fuck