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Impact

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At school today my son got his shit rocked on the playground for expressing the belief that human beings are able to change for the better

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squeeb is in fine feather

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mom said it's my turn to recontextualize prior gravity falls episodes into something sad 👓

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Yup another year my stupid ass ruined both the cantata and the jubilee well i guess its up to the only friend i got that dont hate me right now named Peppemint schnapps to take care of me until i cant think anymore maybe somepne will finaly take my aparts as metal scrap while im out cold in the icy streets since im no good no more but maybe my sweet holiday prince will take me in and save me but i dont think thats very likely since im just a insane fuck up that dont even deserve no chunka coals or spank on the behind

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when you’re telling a funny story and they are laughing too hard to hear the rest of it so u just give them time to breathe

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let me tell you driving from Ohio to Washington in a SmartCar with everything I owned was funny enough on its own but once I got west of the Rockies, every. single. time. I stopped ar a gas station, random dads would just spawn beside my car. like there was some sort of dad portal following me. and they’d see my ohio plates and go, “did you DRIVE through the mountains in that?” and every. single. time. I’d go, “well, they didn’t airlift me!”

it killed. it absolutely cleared ever time. never failed to make the dads laugh. they were obsessed. i said it the same every time. it was like I was in a groundhog day timeloop on interstate 70 westbound gas stations. and you know what? I was happy.

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Knowing a fic author through AO3 is like attending someone’s thesis presentation and politely clapping at the end, knowing a fic author through this hellsite is like going over to their house at 3AM to watch them eat mayonnaise out of a jar

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deeply obsessed with the salmon edit by _olive_ridley on TikTok

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I love watching birds fly south for the winter

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Can you teach me the ways of the horny salmon

do you want to know how to recognise them or how to be them

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Been talking about this with friends so I present to you, the cursed spectrum of media literacy

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im actually cleft in twain right now can i call you back

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by kelly pringle

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