pinkladybug

[pinkladybug]

Cheers to a wonderful year!

[pinkladybug]

My christmas date 😘😍

[pinkladybug]

Merry christmas from the Figueroa girls!

[pinkladybug]

Tulin ni Lourdes ngan Fidel :)

[pinkladybug]

The Figueroa girls.

[pinkladybug]

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Sandie (@sandiesirable)

Ayala triangle. (at Ayala Triangle Gardens)

[pinkladybug]

The face of a grateful heart. #typhoonnona #nonaph

[pinkladybug]

The Nona aftermath

[pinkladybug]

[pinkladybug]

Im no super human.

[pinkladybug]

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Sandie (@sandiesirable)

Christmas is fun in the Philippines :)

[pinkladybug]

Im both excited and scared in preparing this one. With the on going exams Im actually worried how I can manage everything but I am blessed with a great team. I know this will work out fine.

[pinkladybug]

12.17.15

[pinkladybug]

Then third year comes. You learn to live for the day. You learn to survive each moment.

We need to talk....

…about some things that no one tells you about medical school. Medical school is akin to running a marathon at a sprint pace the whole time, and this can be really fucking exhausting. Yes, people talk about how hard it is, but there’s always a note of cheery optimism - “I got through it and so can you! How hard can it be?”. 

Well - really really hard.

First year is exciting and new; you’re drowning in new material so you always feel like you’re learning something new. But you’re also treading water constantly trying to stay above the tide of material, which means that by the end of the year, you’re exhausted. Exhilarated, yes. But also exhausted. Then comes summer and you come back in second year thinking, I’ve got this, I’m well rested and ready. The thing is, second year is more massive chunks of information. This is the part where you feel like you’re running a marathon at a sprint pace, except now you have blocks of cement on your feet; more information to shove in and it feels like there will always be new facts to learn. And I haven’t even started studying for the Step yet. 

Maybe it’s just me, but the more time I spend in a classroom and away from patients, the more I feel like I’m dragging. The more arcane facts I memorize about tuberculosis and mesothelioma and hypertrophic obstructive cardiomyopathy, the more I forget why I came here in the first place. It’s easy to lose sight of your goals in the face of the fifty-odd cardiology lectures you need to get through by Monday for your final. 

I’m not sure what the point of this post is. Maybe just to remind myself to breathe, to remind myself that I’m here for a purpose. To remind myself that sometimes it all clicks and that’s a really great feeling. To remind myself that I’m not slow or dumb, just worn down and doing the best I can. To remind myself that at the end of the day, it’s about patient care and connecting with people, which I’m really fucking good at - even if I can’t remember the 12 causes of gallstones. To remind myself that I came here for a reason and that I can finish this marathon at a sprint pace. And to remind myself to never, ever, EVER ask someone “How hard can it be?”. Harder than you can ever imagine. 

[pinkladybug]

Signing of with this message. :)

[pinkladybug]

Growing means learning to adapt to change and leaving the old ways behind.

[pinkladybug]