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woah there BUD!

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recently came across some plates and bowls that would be perfect for a children's hospital

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Let’s play doctor. I'll go first. You owe me $3200.

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I love in grace kelly when mika says he tried "a little freddie" bc it's like mika we are all friends here. let us be honest with one another. there is no way that the amount of freddie that you tried was "a little"

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captain james tea cunt of the mothership enterpussy and his first officer mr. serve

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One of my favorite hoaxes was in early 1962. There was a musical that debuted in 1961 called Subways are for Sleeping that was doing very poorly. For bizarre reasons (ads were banned in the New York subway system lest people take it as permission to sleep there) and normal (the reviews were poor).

But in 1962 an ad came out full of effusive praise from every prominent theater critic in New York. Every single one. From the Times to the Post, all of the famous theater critics in New York LOVED Subways Are For Sleeping

Except...

One of the papers paid to run this ad noticed something...off. Namely, that he knew Richard Watts the theater critic and he wasn't African-American.

It turns out that the producer of the musical had found seven New Yorkers with the same names as the seven biggest theater critics in New York, since while he couldn't lie and say they liked it, but he could pay for *a* John Chapman or *a* Robert Coleman to see the musical and quote them next to their photo truthfully, bc how many people even knew what the leading theater critics in NYC looked like?

Turns out the producer had wanted to do this for ages, but had to wait for the NYT's critic to retire bc he couldn't find anyone with the same name. Anyway it worked: it went from being about to close, to running another couple hundred shows and winning a Tony

Here's the main source for this, btw

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need a trip to m&s, but sadly on the wrong side of the atlantic

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If EVERYBODY in your life hates your significant other then they are the problem. If it is one or two people like a family member you have a turbulent relationship with and one friend who’s always been kind of jealous, maybe they just hate your success. But most of the time that is not the case and the people who are closest to you and love you and have had your back for years probably know when your new relationship is toxic and/or doomed.

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do you ever start writing a comment on the internet and then think “oh what the fuck am i going on about” and delete it

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the working title was "horatio hornblower midshipman fail compilation"

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Thinking ab what episode would be the sexiest for a time loop. The thing is there are so many options. Steranko episode time loop but the steranko is also caught in it & starts preparing for parker. Hardison & eliot at the pool with moreau with eliot trying over and over to make the conversation that much faster, to find the right words so hardison can survive. Dubenich being the one caught in a loop & using that to manipulate them better in the pilot until they figure out that something is fishy.....

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You, Nancy Wheeler, have guns, plural, in your bedroom?

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I’m just saying if they did make Muppets The Iliad, they couldn’t actually depict Achilles mowing Hector down and spearing him through the throat so instead how this would look is Animal dragging a very much alive Pepe the Prawn around in circles and laughing maniacally while an uncomfortable Kermit looks at the camera and does that face where the hand inside him clenches a little.

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Sometimes I just wish I could-

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I'm volunteering for a literary journal right now and there's two things I think you all should know.

1. Most people that submit to literary journals are cis white men. We know this because our journal has an anonymous survey about demographics for people that submit.

2. Most things that get submitted to the creative non fiction section are on the level of middle school "What I did over the summer" essays.

I cannot see the demographics of the people whose essays I'm reading, but guys, if you are wondering if you should submit your work to a literary journal or not, I promise you that just in terms of statistics there are a lot of mediocre cis white men and people in general confidently submitting weird crap that isn't literature to literature magazines. Do it. Submit your work. Please. If you want there to be more diversity in literature, be the diversity. Do it. Do it do it do it.