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It started off, as most things involving Daniel did, as a joke.

The recovery of Earth, and the rest of the galaxy, was in full swing. The rubble was cleared, the slapdash emergency shelters to keep safe civilians needing to hide from the elements and eezo storms replaced with semipermanent housing, and businesses started popping up.

Daniel wanted nothing more to do with war, and thankfully Renee was in agreement. Once he was back on his feet he worked construction, part time and then every moment he had to spare once the doctors cleared him, but as rewarding as it was he couldn't quite manage the heavy duty work needed for the more permanent structures. So he had a few quiet talks with his girlfriend, his fiancee, and his wife.

They bought a truck, a barbecue, and a steel canopy. Within a week someone donated three tables and chairs to sit at. Supplies just appeared - napkins, plates, water jugs. They tried just giving it away but soon accepted donations and, finally, putting actual prices on the chalkboard menu.

Then they upgraded to an honest to god diner with a real kitchen. Renee ran the front, because for some reason she loved being a waitress, and Daniel worked in the kitchen. They had to hire a few people and chose to work with employment services for underprivileged refugees, veterans … orphans. A kid of twelve, an art prodigy, painted a gigantic mural along one wall that told the story of humanity's survival. Business leveled off at an acceptable, but not quite comfortable, level.

And then Daniel had an idea while watching the first reboot season of a lip-sync show.

So in a hairnet, apron, and whisk in hand he worked up an omelette while Renee recorded. A couple days later he made a cheeseburger. But the cake… that's what got everyone's attention.

Like, everyone.

He worked with an animal shelter and borrowed a little dog with an ‘ADOPT ME’ bandana. He wore one too, just for laughs and because Renee told him he was an adorable dumbass. He slung ingredients and measuring cups around the kitchen, Renee pieced it together and put it on the ‘net, and the rest was history. Any time there was a new recipe, when a charity needed funds, or Daniel just got too bored there was a new video. He even did a six-hour long livestream one day when some mouth breathing dingbat tried to say the videos were fake and he probably made his wife do all the real work, dancing along to old twenty first century pop songs while flipping pancakes in the air like a seasoned pro *just to prove the haters wrong*.

He still volunteered construction time, once he had enough cooks he could trust to run the place right. He still made sure to spend a lot of quality time with his sister, his wife, his son. Sons. And daughters too, eventually. Even his damn brother, faking at being civil and then cordial and then friendly and then finally getting along after a few decades of fistfights.

But damn, Daniel just loved to cook.

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Origin Story: Daniel Tanner

(aka: the origin story for the ex-Cerberus Vanguard ME3MP/RP character I created ages ago as I stumbled into a group of lifelong friends entirely by accident.)

Porsgrunn is a shithole. Humanity found the solar system, found the Relay, found the stars. Found the fucking Turians, which went great. Humanity found the Citadel, and the galaxy.

And of all the colony worlds humanity chose to take for itself, the Tanner family chose some backwater shithole in the ass end of the Terminus Systems. Mom, Dad, and little David, off on their great adventure into the unknown so they could make their fortune. That went great too.

David was doted on as the eldest. The one with the most promise, they thought, showering him with the best schooling and tutors and books. Then came Daniel. He was more energetic where David was reserved, playful where David was serious. Everything their parents said compared the two against each other instead of encouraging them to get close, so they bickered, then argued, then fought. Petty words turned to shouting matches, turned to fistfights. Split knuckles and stitches, that defined their relationship.

Hannah was an accident. Oops, they knew they should have taken care of that right away after Daniel. Now in addition to a brilliant son and a pain in the ass, they had a baby to look after.

David wanted little to do with her at first and when their parents were busy working Daniel was the one who got stuck with her. That suited all of them just fine – the boys weren’t fighting, and that’s all they cared about. As she grew older, insatiably curious and wanting to explore, it took both boys to keep track of her. They struggled to keep up with her desire to learn, to know. David pulled out his old books, the videos, games, puzzles. Daniel took her on hikes, climbing trees, boulders, chasing each other through the hilly woods near town.

David graduated high school. He had a scholarship to the best universities, on Earth and elsewhere, and pissed off his parents by rejecting all of them in favor of joining the Alliance military as an engineer.

Daniel was left to take care of Hannah, so he gave her as much love as he could manage. Bandaged up her knees when she fell, answered questions he didn’t entirely understand himself, made sure she ate. Hid her when the batarians attacked, again and again, wanting to take away from the humans the world they didn’t even want for themselves.

Daniel listened to the people in the town square while Hannah climbed trees with the other kids. Heard them talk about protecting humanity, doing what was necessary, since the Alliance was too busy kissing Council-race asses to care about the backwater colony worlds. Hardworking colonists deserved protection too, they said, and someone had to step up. Would he be one of them?

He started teaching Hannah other things. How to patch up her own skinned knees, look up the answers to her questions, taught her how to cook. How to talk to their parents so they’d actually do something for her.

‘I don’t want you to go!’ she whispered one night, as he tucked her into bed. She was too old for it, really, but they both enjoyed the ritual of it.

‘Whatcha talking about, bug?’

‘You’re gonna leave, like David.’

He’d taught her too well, he supposed. ‘Yeah. There’s a group, soldiers. They protect people like us. Humanity. They always need strong kids like me to join them.’

‘Can I come with?’

He booped her nose. ‘You’re too little. When you’re older, like me, you can make your decision. Until then you need to stay here, stay safe. It’ll be okay.’

‘...okay.’

The day he graduated high school he skipped the ceremony. His parents weren’t there anyway, they’d already celebrated their star child’s graduation from the Alliance academy and were ‘too busy’ to attend. He didn’t care. His bags were already packed, and he headed to the spaceport after a tearful goodbye with his sister. He wrote her two letters before arriving at his destination.

The station sucked. Tests, tests, more tests. Blood samples, physical endurance activities, aptitude tests. Biotic abilities. Porsgrunn had a small amount of eezo in the atmosphere, and that was apparently enough. That was an exciting day, or so he was told, and he was moved to a different wing of the station; one with a huge, stylized phoenix emblazoned on the triple-bulkhead entrance door.

‘Welcome to your new life, kid,’ his escort said as he was brought to yet another medical office for yet another round of tests.

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Oh no now Daniel's getting injured again

Jensen Ackles || Tracker || Off the books

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Jensen Ackles as Russell Shaw TRACKER | 1.12 - “Off the Books”

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By the time they actually GOT to Noveria, Dan was so tired he basically curled up on top of Renee and fell asleep.  Renee, for her part, was happy to have her snoring nuclear reactor back for a few hours.

DAN AND SCOOTER STUCK IN AN AIRPORT. Dude it doesn't even have to be an AU, maybe the shuttle at the station is idefk i just want bored dan and scooter

“Shuttle 947 to Noveria will be delayed…” The automated voice paused in a way that made Dan think there was actually a real person somewhere on the other end “Nine hours.”

“NINE HOURS.” Ben looked at him, green eyes huge with horror. “Danny I don’t want to waste my precious youth in a damn layover just so you could see your girlfriend at her new job.”

“You didn’t have to come, LIttle Cat, you could have stayed back at the base and..” Dan started, watching as the assorted other sentients started trying desperately to make other arrangements. “And done training drills.”

“You are a sadistic monster.” Ben moaned. “We’ve already been here for four hours, I’m going to die if we don’t eat something soon. Growing baby biotic, remember, Training Officer?”

“Oh now you remember I’m senior Vanguard.” Dan slugged him, and they looked around. “If you can beat me to that Pinkberry stand over there with the really angry salarian, I’ll buy you whatever you want.”

“You throwin’ down with Hurricane, there, Warhammer? Because I’ll do you one better. I’ll beat you to that pinkberry AND the one on the upper level, and get that krogan’s green tea with mochi bits in the process.”

“Oh, you are so on, Little Cat. Throw in the bookstore on the way back.”

“Deal, old man.”

And that is why Dan and Ben were never allowed to go on leave together ever again.

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If anyone wants an explanation of why Daniel acts the way he does, this is it.  Right here.  He’s okay with crying in public.  Hugging his friends or sprawled out on a couch with them.  He’s affectionate with his friends and he’s not afraid to show it, and that’s what keeps him sane.

Straight men who infantilize women’s friendships have no fucking survival instinct. Like my uncle is always making fun of and rolling his eyes at my aunt’s friend lunches and telephone dates with her lady friends, teasing her like she’s a gossipy teenage girl in high school drama. And my aunt just laughs about it but I know for a fact that if it wasn’t for her best friend K, she would have probably set him on fire by now. 

Like straight men are capable of maybe a quarter of the indepth emotional labor and support women do for each other. Like men can literally have one friend named Bob that they go fishing with once a year and still be content for life. Then they think it’s cute and girlish that their wives have these long term, integrated, emotionally intense relationships with women but like…LOL, it’s not because men don’t need those kinds of relationships, it’s just that they get it all from their wives while offering peanuts in return. PEANUTS.

Like if your woman is on the phone for 2 hours with her friend and you think that’s childish of her, just know that she spent half of that time getting the support that you should be giving her (but are incapable of) and the rest lamenting what a giant fucking baby manchild you are.

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Post War

((Where Daniel and Scooter snuggle under a tree in Dan’s backyard while the kids run all over, because Dan just does that with his friends.))

Scooter poked Daniel’s arm to get his attention.  ‘Do you ever miss the old days?  Before the war?  Maybe before Cerberus?’

Daniel shrugged.  ‘Sometimes.  Feels like it’s a galaxy away.  A few lifetimes, a lot of bullets and regret.’

‘It wasn’t all bad though?’

Daniel lifted his arm and brought it around Scooter’s shoulders, pulling him in.  Scooter burrowed into the embrace and rested his head on Daniel’s chest.

‘Nah. Some of it was pretty all right.  Sometimes it hurts to think about that stuff...’

*

‘Danny. Daaaaannyyyyyy.  Wake up.’

‘Ugh.  Ben, I’ve been back for four hours.  I’m tryina sleep here.’

Ben ignored the Vanguard’s protests and flopped onto the bed.  ‘Danny, it’s movie night and it’s an Earth classic and we’re gonna have popcorn and you won’t believe me but we talked Nico and Parker into making a blanket fort for everyone.  And Ethan got me this new shampoo, it’s supposed to smell like...’

*

Daniel sighed.  ‘Times like this, Little Cat, I just try to remember what I have now.  Like us sitting here, eating ice cream, and watching my kids run around like the holy terrors they are.’

Scooter nodded.  The branches of the tree swayed in a light breeze, not strong enough to drag the eezo currents over town and force everyone inside.  Years after the war and Daniel still kept his omni-tool close at hand in case of weather notifications for himself and the others in the neighborhood with small children.  Renee told him about three times a day that he worried too much, and maybe she was right. Okay, she was definitely right.  But Daniel like to think that in the grand scheme of post traumatic stress, having no less than fifty alert notifications set up for various things was pretty tame.  Some of his family, blood and otherwise, had come out much worse.

He buried his face in Scooter’s hair, hugging him tightly, and let himself feel sorry for both of them for a moment.  He felt awful about what happened to Ben and Scooter, guilty for not being there when the kid needed him, for all the little moments when he let his friend down.  He sniffled so his nose didn’t drip into Scooter’s hair and caught a whiff of … mango?

It was enough to drag his mind out of its dive into self-loathing.  The sniffles became a laugh and he hugged even tighter.  ‘Scooter, you turd, were you into Renee’s shampoo?’  Muffled giggles served as enough of a reply.

Yeah, sometimes it was a galaxy of regret.  Others it wasn’t so bad.

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Lunar Melody by renekisselbachphotography

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Candids from Phoenix One and after the war at the Tanner Ranch.

jensen ackles in season 9 gag reel

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((My dash did an awesome thing.))

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 Get to know me meme -  [5/5] favorite male characters : Dean Winchester

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more adventures from Daniel's modern-au college days. XD

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modern AU where daniel has a bit of a personal crisis during his college years while working at the diner

Priestly shirts that were in the script, but didn’t make it into the final cut: “They don’t pay me enough to be nice to you.” and "Don’t annoy the crazy person."

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Ethan Tanner grew to a Child and this is his default outfit.

FABULOUS

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Ain't that the truth.

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so i have a new sims 3 family and this is happening.  the second pic tho

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