phoenixhavoc
Just Another Weirdo
285 posts
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
phoenixhavoc · 7 months ago
Video
Hey now, you’re an all star
listen to what I orchestrated
SoundCloud
YouTube
Instagram reel (please share directly from my own account)
190K notes · View notes
phoenixhavoc · 5 years ago
Photo
Tumblr media
soooo I did a thing.
35K notes · View notes
phoenixhavoc · 5 years ago
Text
...fuck is that not what I was supposed to do?
Fate, but all of your aspects must come from TVTropes.
427 notes · View notes
phoenixhavoc · 5 years ago
Text
Everybody Is John
The whole party plays one character
773 notes · View notes
phoenixhavoc · 5 years ago
Text
Dont shame me like that! Poor Ireena had enough to deal with before a murder hobo wanted to kill her for a necklace (plus I'm pretty sure that would mean insta tpk once Strahd learns what happened)
As a DM, discourage the party from derailing the campaign by crying every time they do something unexpected. Oh, you want to kill the kind NPC that was supposed to guide you to the Big Bad’s Evil Lair later on? Sure, just lemme grab my tissues…
567 notes · View notes
phoenixhavoc · 5 years ago
Photo
Tumblr media
i finally finished my baby girls’s ref sheet. Meet River, the 15 y/o Aasimar Sorcerer who hates people and hates standing buildings just a bit more
46 notes · View notes
phoenixhavoc · 5 years ago
Photo
Lol this is exactly like when my players had to fight an Abyssal chicken. Rip the aasimar
Tumblr media
It’s a lovely morning in Whitestone and you are a horrible shadow demon.
(I was using weird goose mouths as reference for drawing my version of Orthax, so here we are.)
4K notes · View notes
phoenixhavoc · 5 years ago
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Stevonnie!!
19K notes · View notes
phoenixhavoc · 5 years ago
Photo
Ok but its a cute dress with pockets!! Ill take 3
Tumblr media
💎 𝗡𝗲𝘄 𝗶𝘁𝗲𝗺! Dress of Many Pockets Wondrous item, common ___
This dress has six pockets that can be magically shown or hidden. While wearing the dress, you can use a bonus action to cause any number of its pockets to appear or vanish from it. The pockets can be located anywhere on the dress, and needn’t be in the same place each time they appear. Each pocket is large enough for a small parcel, measuring no more than 4 inches in any dimension and weighing no more than 2 pounds. While a pocket is hidden, its contents are magically moved to the inside of the dress and evenly distributed throughout it so as to not affect its delicate appearance. ___
✨ Patrons get huge perks! Access this and hundreds of other item cards, art files, and compendium entries when you support The Griffon’s Saddlebag on Patreon for only $1 to $7 a month!
173 notes · View notes
phoenixhavoc · 5 years ago
Text
Snakes learning time travel, colorized; 1956
Shortly before the time cops beat all snakes to death. The remaining refugees are currently in modern day Ireland where the Cheese Pope forces Cheese Catholicism upon their broken spirits.
A fun fact about this is that Saint Neil Patrick Harris of Ireland was known for making the contraceptives using snakes, driving them to extinction in Ireland. So these are the first snakes to arrive in Ireland since then. Saint Harris and his husband Gregory the Goat never produced children due to this.
Modern Snake culture consists mainly of slithering, hissing, and serving Queen and Country when geese rampage in town. Despite often dying in vain, they proudly continue to wield cheese spears during these attacks.
It should be noted that other species that descended from snakes are not subject to being beaten by time cops. Notable examples include: The Japanese Snake Girl, The Grecian Medusa, and the American Lawyer.
For further examples of snake culture please make a request with the Cheese Papacy who is currently in the middle of burning most of the heretical texts snakes have written including many texts disparaging Saint Harris. If requests are denied you may make further inquiry by approaching the Vault of Souls and Knowledge directly at the following coordinates: [REDACTED]
Anyway thanks for coming to my TED tall, grandma.
Tumblr media
Image prompt
4K notes · View notes
phoenixhavoc · 5 years ago
Photo
Endgame had representation?
Tumblr media
4K notes · View notes
phoenixhavoc · 5 years ago
Text
Tumblr media
The Foundation says Trans Rights
24 notes · View notes
phoenixhavoc · 5 years ago
Photo
Tumblr media Tumblr media
uh. can somebody call him back and get a clarification on our omen
3K notes · View notes
phoenixhavoc · 5 years ago
Video
This is beautiful
youtube
It finally happened. During last night’s Ravenloft D&D game, I put on my best Rob Cantor impersonation and unleashed Actual Cannibal Shia LaBeouf on my players.
I have accomplished all I ever wished to as a Dungeon Master.
I opened the encounter almost verbatim to the song:
“You’re walking in the Svalich woods. There’s no one around, And you suspect the sun is dead. Out of the corner of your eye you spot him, Shia Labeouf!”
The players were stunned silent.
“He’s following you About 30 feet back. He gets down on all fours and breaks into a sprint. He’s gaining on you. And you can see there’s blood on his face! My god, there’s blood everywhere!
…roll initiative.”
Tumblr media
28K notes · View notes
phoenixhavoc · 5 years ago
Text
Peter : What’s an orgasm?
Tony : Where did you hear-
Steve : It’s when you fold paper to look like birds and stuff.
Bucky : That’s oregano you-
Tony : stOP-
10K notes · View notes
phoenixhavoc · 5 years ago
Photo
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Goth noodle artificer Ju They have 5 strength, rip to them.
182 notes · View notes
phoenixhavoc · 5 years ago
Text
Already exists, it's called Dear Elizabeth
Roleplay by mail.
567 notes · View notes