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Are there any other convenient way to meet other people that doesn't include joining group tours and activities? Dating apps doesn't really work for me. I feel like I am running out of options :(

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The Early Diary of Anaïs Nin, 1920–1923

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Realized how serious SERIOUS the repercussions of my actions were. Like… kailangan ko talagang ayusin to ng mabuti. Why… am I like this? Nasasaktan ako for myself. Alam ko naman di to mangyayari kung maayos lang sana yung way of thinking ko… kung wala akong mental health issues. Ang sakit sobra. Paano na to? Paano na ako?

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Going back to my inner child's dreams and aspirations....

Hope I'll make her proud :)

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I can't believe I put people on a high pedestal because I think so lowly of myself. I thought they were the complete opposite of me, turns out they were worse than me. Can't believe na hinahayaan ko lang yung ibang tao na tapak-tapakan ako kasi feeling ko deserve ko naman. Na doon naman talaga dapat ako. Can't believe na all these years na-condition ko yung utak ko na hindi ako magaling, na di ko deserve na maging masaya, na di ko deserve yung maayos na buhay.

I kept telling it to myself, nagulat nalang ako isang araw naging totoo na nga. Damn. Maayos ko ba yung buhay ko with 5 years of therapy? Disclaimer: This blog really is my online diary. Kasama na 'to sa digital footprint ko. And if people read this and thought na sad girl ako masyado, well guess what? You're right!

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"Trust on the Lord's plans for you..."

Well maybe God already gave up on me! I'm almost 30 pero lost pa rin ako.

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I can do all things through despise that strengthens me.

Somehow teary-eyed while typing this post. All of the years wasted, rotting myself in my house because of the trauma, accepting that I am broken beyond repair. How do you even get out of this cycle?

Wow, Lord, grabe.

We only have one life in this world, but must I suffer this much?

I was reading this book about trauma, and chapter 1 palang ako pero parang di ko na kaya basahin.

"That was a long time ago, but looking back now, I realize I have been peeking into that deserted alley for the past 5 years."

I jut wish God gives me the strength to overcome all this.

"After trauma the world becomes sharply divided between those who know and those who don't"

I promised myself that I will be better, and I will make myself and my loved ones proud.

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just dropping by to say ang olats ko. Hahahaha. This is so hard! How do you even sell yourself? Maybe di pa talaga ako knowledgable about marketing because how come I do not have even an ounce of idea about this. Huhuhuhu. Kaiyak.

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Heart hurts...

I noticed that majority of my posts here are about my misery.

Is this who I am as a person? Is this all I am? Is this the digital footprint that I would want to leave for my grandchildren to discover?

This past week I questioned my bravery and strength.

I realized that I should spend more time with my parents.

Hayyyy... They are getting older and I am still worthless.

I do not want them to leave this earth tapos wala pa akong nararating. I only have 3 goals in my life right now. At ni isa, di ko pa nakukuha. Gadaaamn.

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“I'm a master at speaking silently, all my life I've spoken silently and I've lived through entire tragedies in silence.”

Fyodor Dostoevsky, The Meek One.

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from letters to a young poet, rainer maria rilke

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!!!!

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Y'all... at this point I'm just winging it. There is this job offer with a great salary. And bro, I am so afraid to get out of my comfort zone for this. Parang di ko keri? I don't know why the opportunity came. But they said they're a match for me =((( I do not think I am good enough for this :/ haayyy why am i such an overthinker :(

It's a hair dye company from the US! The funny thing is it's been 2 years since I dyed my hair hahahaha. Tapos I said something along the lines of "For someone who likes to dye her hair a lot, this job is a dream for me" weh???? hahahahaha

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understanding poetry is very simple. poems are good when they make you sit on your kitchen floor and scream

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AAYYYEE??

fatima aamer bilal, from all that is damaging.

[text id: there’s always a home. the one you’re running to or the one you’re running from.]

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Khaled Hosseini, The Kite Runner/Jaun beaur

Almost, Almost, almo...